Insomnia
by KittykatMC
Summary: Back in high school Jamie suffered a terrible ordeal in the hands of a psychotic Sniper who threatened him. But when Jamie finally reveals the truth can the Reagans race against time and find the killer before he finds Jamie again? CHAPTER 25 NOW UP!
1. Chapter 1  Sibling Concern

**INSOMNIA**

**Author's Note: **This is my first fanfic - I love Blue Bloods and the Danny/Jamie dynamic! This is more of a backstory for Jamie and takes place when he's 16. Tell me what you think! I own the plot not the characters!

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><p><strong>INSOMNIA<strong>

**Chapter 1 – Sibling Concern**

_**June 6th 2000**_

Jamie dumped his school bag on the floor and slammed his room door shut. He stared at himself in the mirror. The dark circles under his bloodshot eyes had become even darker and his skin was much paler. He slapped his cheeks trying to stop his heavy lids from drooping.

"Must stay awake," he murmured. He couldn't go down to dinner. It was Joe's birthday, meaning the whole family would be there and he knew they wouldn't lay off him, especially Danny… God if they ever found out…

Jamie decided to keep busy in order to stay awake so he spread his books out among his desk and tried to study his Spanish verbs for the test tomorrow.

"Seria, serias, seriamos, seriais, serian – conditional present tense – and…" he broke off in a yawn and rubbed his eyes. "present subjunctive is – is – uh, sea, seas – seamos, seais, sean," he agitatedly tapped his pencil on his face to try and stay awake. "And the imperfect subjunctive is – is – is – fuera, fueras, fuera, fueramos, fuerais – fueran," Jamie's eyelids were closing, "and the imperative….is…um…"

He was wondering down a dark alleyway, now he broke into a run, faster and faster unable to get away. He heard the evil laughter in the background, the laughter that haunted his dreams every night since the event. Jamie tripped and fell face first into a wall, hearing a crack and feeling the blood flow freely through his nose. He kept on running, the fog quickly starting to surround him.

"Kid! Hey kid!" Danny! He heard his brother! If anyone would help him get out of this Danny would! Vaguely he could make out a figure behind the wire mesh fence, it was Danny, and he was frantically trying to get to him but he couldn't. Jamie reached the fence and tried to grab onto Danny's hand.

"Danny! Danny! Danny you have to help me," Jamie screamed, "he's going to kill me!" Jamie glanced over his shoulder and to his horror saw the silhouette of his murderer spread over the wall. He screamed and tried to shake the fence. Danny, his face twisted with determination, climbed over the fence. Jamie tried to grab onto Danny's hand but he felt like a ghost. A hand was creeping up behind him.

"Jamie!" Danny's face was contorted with worry, "Look out!"

The hand grabbed his shoulder, "Jamie," he shouted, he had Joe's voice… huh… Jamie jerked awake. It took him a few seconds to realize that he had fallen asleep on his desk and Joe had been yelling at him from the landing.

"Jamie, dinner's ready!" Joe knocked his special knock on Jamie's room and entered, "Jamie, Ma wants you to come downstairs." Jamie nodded but didn't say anything, expecting Joe to just turn around and go back downstairs. Instead he cautiously walked towards Jamie and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Are you okay?" he asked his little brother, voice filled with concern.

"Yeah," Jamie lied, "I'm just studying for a Spanish test tomorrow. So, how does it feel to be twenty-three?"

Joe laughed, "The same as being twenty-two! Either way I'm so glad I'm not in high school anymore!"

"Being a rookie cop must be so much better," Jamie said sarcastically.

"You know it! Instead of being shut up in my room studying verbs, I get to cruise the streets every day and night arresting drunks and giving directions to tourists in Times Square!" Jamie smiled weakly. Joe's smile faded as he looked at his brother's pale, tired face. "Look man, if there's anything wrong that you don't wanna tell Ma and Dad about, you know you can always come talk to us about it. Me, Erin, Danny are always here and we're not going anywhere!"

Don't count on it, Jamie thought bitterly remembering Danny in his nightmare. "Joe! Jamie! What's up there a black hole? Get down here so we can eat!" Danny chimed.

Joe laughed, "We'll be right there!" he hollered back and the two of them went downstairs. As soon as Jamie entered the dining room, just as he expected, all eyes were on him. His mother rushed over to feel his forehead.

"Honey," she said fussing over him, "have you got a fever?"

"No, Ma stop," he muttered, pushing her hand away and glancing at Danny, "I'm fine."

"You sure as hell don't look fine kid," said Danny worriedly walking towards him and rubbing his thumb under Jamie's eye. "You have pander eyes now how much sleep have you had?"

"I've just been really busy studying for a Spanish test tomorrow," Jamie mumbled, sitting down at the table. Everybody else quietly took their places and after Joe said grace they all began eating.

"Jamie, you didn't answer your brother's question." His father's quiet yet booming voice acknowledged his presence at the head of the table.

"About what?" Jamie asked innocently watching Danny roll his eyes in impatience.

"About what? You know what, your sleep, how much are you getting?"

"Well… I dunno, here and there."

"What the hell's that supposed to mean?" Danny asked angrily.

"Daniel!" Mary scolded, "please refrain from using such words at the table if you can help it!"

"Sorry Ma, but I'm worried about Jamie, I mean look at him!" Everyone turned to stare at Jamie again. He felt his cheeks flush and wished everybody would just stop.

"Danny's right Jamie," Linda said softly, "you need your sleep, especially if you're studying."

"After my exams are over I'll sleep for a week I promise. Look I'm not the only one okay, Dean and I both stay up and -"

"I don't give a damn about Dean it's you I'm worried about!"

"Well don't be! Look I'm just really busy with school and basketball practice, we have a game coming up, nothing's wrong," Jamie caught Joe's eye and looked away quickly.

"Son maybe you should cut down on some of your extra-curricular activities, you're doing too much." Frank suggested gently.

"No way!" Jamie yelped, "I need to do all that stuff!"

"You're on the basketball team, debate team, glee club, Spanish club, National Honours Society as well as being Yearbook editor and President of the Government, Law and Human Services and you still find the time to volunteer down at the animal shelter three days a week and maintain your decent grade average!" Erin said exasperatedly, "maybe you should cut back just a tad!"

"Yeah just a tad," Joe repeated with a laugh.

"I told you I can't," Jamie sighed, "I have to do all this extra stuff to even think about getting into a decent college. I bring food to the homeless shelter on weekends as well."

"Be careful kid, you're in danger of overdosing on virtue!" Danny said laughing and shaking his head.

"What's an o – oerdose?" piped a three year old Nikki from the corner of the table.

"Thanks," said Erin sarcastically to her brother before shovelling more food onto her daughter's plate to shut her up, "never you mind honey, eat some veggies now, good girl."

"In my day we didn't need to do all that extra nonsense! You were accepted into a college based solely on your performance at school and who you are as an individual," Henry interjected sharply.

"I know Pops, but sadly these days that's just not enough," Mary said passing the salad round.

"He's not even graduating until two years from now!" Danny said incredulously.

"He? You know I am right here!" Jamie said waving his fork at Danny who just grinned mockingly.

"I highly doubt any decent college is gonna care about whether you sang in glee club or not," Johnny said curtly. Erin shot her husband a sharp look for saying something so tactless to her brother.

"Brown cares! Columbia cares! Princeton cares, they all care!" Jamie whined.

"My baby brother, the over-achiever!" Danny announced to the table.

"Don't bust my balls Danny!" Jamie said in annoyance and in doing so arousing an "EH!" from nearly every adult around the table save for Danny who had collapsed into a silent fit of laughter. Jamie tried to be mad at him but couldn't, he smiled sheepishly at his older brother who winked at him. He couldn't hold a grudge against his big brother whom he held as a hero just because of a stupid dream. Besides Danny did try to help him in the dream but he couldn't grab hold of his hand. Nevertheless that same feeling of unease settled within him and even though he was grateful for the talk about college, Danny's latest case and Joe's usual round of rookie anecdotes, he still felt scared. He didn't want to go sleep in case he had those nightmares again. Those nightmares which have haunted him for the past week now, these dreams he can't seem shake no matter how much he tried.

He prayed every night to God for forgiveness in order to stop this punishment. He even tried talking to a priest after school yesterday and confessed what had happened but it still ate him up inside. Jamie hastily gulped down his whole glass of water to stop himself from throwing up. Jamie knew he shouldn't be keeping this secret to himself but he didn't have a choice. If he told anyone, he'd be dead. He had survived an awful massacre last month, one casual Saturday at the mall with his friends turned into an afternoon of hell. He'd only just recovered from that… or so he thought.

Danny watched his baby brother occasionally throughout dinner, his brotherly and cop instincts telling him that Jamie was not all right and the whole studying excuse for his sleeping patterns was all bullshit. Danny knew Jamie his whole entire life and always knew when there was a problem or when he was lying. What bothered Danny the most was that his brother was in obvious trouble and couldn't tell him what was wrong. He had made it very clear to Joe and Jamie while they were growing up that their big brother was always going to be there for them whether they needed him or not. There was only a year age gap between him and his sister which is why she stubbornly claimed to not need him back in high school. However he knew that was a lie and he was always there for her anyway. But Joe was three years younger than him and Jamie was practically decade younger than Danny which meant that he'd always shouldered a responsibility when it came to the youngest Reagans. Deep down Danny had a feeling that it had something to do with the Kings Plaza shooting. Nobody brought the subject up around Jamie because they knew how badly affected he was by it.

Jamie willed himself to stay awake. He felt so tired yet he couldn't go to sleep. He knew these nightmares would always be there.

After dinner, when everybody had sung Joe a happy birthday, Jamie and Danny were commanded on dishes duty. Danny was grateful for the opportunity to spend some time with Jamie, just the two of them, so they could talk and hopefully Jamie would open up to him.

"Listen kid," Danny whispered as they filled the sink, "they're all in the other room so you can drop the golden boy bullshit."

"I don't know what you're talking about!" Jamie said defiantly.

"Oh come on Jamie, it's just us!" Danny said with annoyance, "I know when you're lying, something's definitely going on." He lowered his voice, "is it bullies?"

"What?" Jamie laughed, "no way! How old do you think I am? Ten?"

"Okay," Danny continued irritably, "then… is it some other kind of school thing?" Jamie didn't say anything. Danny felt the knot in his stomach tighten as he prepared himself for his next question. "Jamie is it – have you – are you… oh Jesus I never thought it would be this hard…"

"No." Jamie said shortly, dipping a plate into the sink and scrubbing it. Danny turned to him in surprise.

"No? What?"

"No, I'm not doing drugs and I don't have an STD."

"Right. Thank god. Well look, you're sixteen I have to ask these things!" Danny said impatiently, catching the amused look on Jamie's face.

"You sound like Dad," Jamie muttered, "no correction you're worse than Dad!"

"Yeah, well, someone's gotta be! Who else is gonna keep you in line huh?" Danny blew a handful of bubbles into Jamie face just he used to when they were younger. Jamie laughed and flicked a few foam bubbles his way. Jamie had to admire him. At twenty-six, Danny Reagan sometimes had the mind of a fourteen year old. That's why it was so much fun when they were younger, at nineteen, twenty, when most guys would rather be seen dead than with their ten year old brother tagging along, Danny would always make time to hang out with his, playing cops and robbers, games of one on one, football…

"You'll make a great Dad in five months," Jamie said proudly.

"You think so?" Danny asked nervously.

"I know so," Jamie answered firmly.

"Thanks kid," Danny said with a warm smile, "that really means a lot to me, to hear you say that. But to tell you the truth… and don't tell anyone this cause I'll only deny it and flush your head in a toilet… I'm actually kinda terrified."

"Terrified? You? Why?" Jamie asked in surprise, "I mean you looked after Joe and me a lot, when Ma and Dad were always working or too busy."

"Yeah," said Danny nostalgically, "I remember. We used have fun together didn't we?"

"Yeah we did, until Erin pitched in." Danny laughed.

"She sure was set to be a lawyer back then huh?"

"Yeah. And what about me?" asked Jamie hopefully. Danny dried his hands and surveyed his baby brother.

"You… you'll make an awesome cop," he pulled his brother into a hug and ruffled his hair, "Detective Reagan!"

"Danny get off! Stop!" he pulled out of his brother's embrace and smoothed his hair. "But seriously, do you think I'll make a good cop like you guys?"

"You're a Reagan. It's in your blood."

"Well Ma doesn't seem to think so," Jamie murmured, "she preferred it if I went into law like Erin." Jamie sighed, "That's why I've been working so hard to get into an ivy league school Danny. If I study pre-law at somewhere like Brown or Columbia then I could go to Harvard or Yale law school!"

"Do you feel pressured to become a lawyer Jamie?" Danny asked with concern. Jamie looked at the floor.

"Hey," Danny tilted his face upwards to look him in the eye. "Have you told anyone how you feel?"

"Well, I talked to Erin," Jamie said nodding, "and she was really enthusiastic about it at first, but then she could tell how unenthusiastic I was. So she just laughed and said that she just wanted me to be happy."

"That's what we all want for you kid. Who knows, maybe you will be happy being a lawyer. But I know you'll be even happier being a cop!" Danny added with a wink.

"Yeah but Ma -?"

"It's not up to Ma!" Danny said abruptly, "It's not her life it's yours. Our lives aren't written in stone kid. We make it up as we go along. You can change your path at any time, just you remember that."

Joe and Erin walked into the kitchen laughing, a plate of cake and ice-cream in each hand.

"For you both," Erin said handing a plate to Danny and Jamie, "for doing such a good job on the dishes."

"Aah, thanks sis!" Danny said with a laugh. The four siblings sat down around the kitchen table like they used to when they were younger, all of them munching on cake, laughing about old times.

"When was the last time we did this?" Erin asked, shaking sprinkles on her ice-cream.

"Before you got married?" Danny said, casting a sly glance at his sister.

"Hey! I always made sure I had time for you guys!" Erin said indignantly, "I even dragged Johnny with us on our annual Fourth of July camping trip back in 96 remember?"

The boys all looked at each other, hands covering their suppressed giggles. Erin frowned at them. Danny saw her reaction and snorted. Once he had broken the seal, Joe and Jamie burst out laughing.

"God that trip was so funny!" Jamie chuckled, pinching the bridge of his nose to stop himself from laughing. "Danny stole his bucket of fish and then when Johnny was chasing him, he tripped on that tree root and fell into a bush of poison ivy!" They all laughed harder except for Erin.

"Stop it you guys!" she moaned sternly.

"He was itching like crazy!" Joe snickered, ignoring his sister. "And he kept threatening to kill you Danny but – but he was so itchy, we couldn't take his threats seriously!"

"Shut up you guys he can hear you!" Erin hissed.

"I couldn't stop laughing myself!" Danny guffawed, "And that just pissed him off even more!"

Erin rolled her eyes at them disapprovingly and absently tucked a strand of hair behind her ears. Jamie suddenly stopped laughing. He noticed a small purple bruise on the right side of Erin's head.

"What happened to your head?" Jamie asked his sister.

"What?"

"There's a bruise on your head!"

Joe and Danny calmed down fast, turning to their sister.

"Oh that!" It was Erin's turn to laugh, she quickly covered it with her hair, "That's just Nikki's handiwork. Never fall asleep and leave a three year old alone with a marker! Remember that Danny for future reference!"

"Got it!" Danny said dismissively waving his fork at her.

"So," Joe started giving Danny a pointed look, "are you guys okay?"

"Yeah," Danny glanced at Jamie, "we talked about careers and stuff, didn't we Jamie?"

"You know," Jamie started without looking up, "if you wanna ask me about the mall shooting you could just ask me. You don't have to keep stammering around the subject all the time."

Danny and Joe exchanged a stupefied glance, "How did you -?"

"Please. I grew up in this family, need I say more."

"Well you're not exactly open about it and we're not one to force," Danny said spraying whipped cream on his dessert.

"Er correction you're the one to force and we just let Jamie come to us," Erin said smugly, leaning towards Joe.

"Exactly, which is why the poor kid is terrified out of his mind!"

"Do you think you he'd be more resilient if he hadn't been involved in a massacre?" Joe asked Danny in frustration.

"Why do you even have to ask me that? Of course he'd be more resilient; he rode the Screamonater six times!" Danny said aggravated, "and he was only ten!"

"Oh my God," Erin eyed Danny in revulsion, "you're unbelievable you know that Danny? How can you even compare the two?"

"You know how Erin," Danny pointed his fork at her, his voice on even keel, "I don't want to keep surrounding our baby brother with intense negativity all the time. Ever since the damn shooting, all he's ever had is people tiptoeing around him, asking about what happened and what he did that day. They don't give him enough credit for it!"

"Yeah, maybe because he's so young!" Joe stated emphatically.

"Exactly! So he should be admired for surviving something like that! I'm sick of walking around egg shells! He's a Reagan and he should be treated with the same respect as we do when we come home from a job -"

"Danny have you ever listened yourself talking?" Erin asked heatedly, "Maybe for Christmas we could buy you a tape recorder so you can record yourself and play it back. Hopefully then you'll realize what a complete asshole you sound like twenty-four seven!"

"Stop, guys stop! Enough!" Jamie yelled as Danny was about hurl a tirade of abuse towards their sister, Just, please stop fighting." Jamie begged, "It's Joe's birthday and… well after everything, the last thing I want is to have my brother and sister fight, over me. Especially when I say there's no problem."

Danny and Erin exchanged an apologetic glance. "Always the words of wisdom aren't you baby bro," Danny said playfully slapping his brother on the cheek.

"Yeah, so what d'ya say you two call a chocolate truce shot?" Joe said leaning back on his chair and grinning.

"Done!" Danny quickly found two shot glasses and filled it with chocolate sauce. "I haven't done a truce shot since I accidently deflated Jamie's basketball back in 95. Remember those continuous games of one on one we used to play every Sunday after dinner."

"We should really do that again you know," Joe said nonchalantly, "it'd be interesting to see what would happen now."

"Hold on, accidental?" Jamie asked Danny suddenly, frowning, "there's never an accident whenever you're involved! Admit it, you were just a sore loser and didn't want to continue getting crushed!"

"Oh, please!" Danny scoffed, "I could've easily gone ten more rounds with you… I was just…"

"Tired of letting me win," Jamie said mockingly. Danny raised his brow and pointed at him threateningly.

"Aah, lay off him Jamie, it must've been hard for a twenty-two year old to get his ass kicked by his eleven year old kid brother!" Joe said smirking at Danny, who stuck his middle finger up at him.

"What is this nostalgia avenue?" Erin asked in amusement as Danny gave her a glass.

"Yeah I think it's right next to uh, what was the name of that place? Oh yeah, memory lane," Danny said heartily raising his shot glass. "I'm sorry sis, truce?"

"What the hell, truce!" They both downed their shots and Joe and Jamie applauded.

"So, Jamie how's everything going between you and Zoe?" Joe asked, all of them turning back to their dessert.

"Okay," Jamie said blandly.

"You don't sound too enthusiastic," Erin said with a small smile.

"Well, she said that she'd like me to be more committed."

"Chicks," Danny muttered, adding more chocolate sauce. "They can never be happy unless they have something to complain about."

"Committed how?" Erin asked ignoring Danny.

"Please don't tell me you're thinking of getting married?" Danny asked suddenly.

"No, no! God no! She says I'm…distracted a lot." Jamie said absently running his hands through his hair. His siblings all exchanged looks.

"You know Jamie," Erin said softly, "it's natural to have problems. Especially after what happened."

"But it happened to her too. And she seems to be dealing with it fine!" Jamie didn't mean to whine but it just came out like that.

"We never know what goes on behind closed doors though." Erin reached across the table and squeezed her brother's hand, "what you've been through, I can't imagine, but different people deal with their problems different ways."

"Yeah, for example, if you were Danny you would probably be punching a wall every second until it makes you feel better!" Joe stated with a serious face.

"Or if you were Erin you would be cleaning everything until it was spotless!" Danny said with a smirk. Erin stuck her tongue out at him.

The four siblings enjoyed spending some time together then as soon as the clock struck ten, they decided to go their separate ways.

"Hey," Joe pulled Erin to one side, "okay the bruise, no way is that a pen mark." Joe suddenly turned angry, "Did Johnny do that to you?"

"No! What kind of a person do you think he -"

"Then who's done it?" Joe demanded. Erin didn't say anything, just continued to stare guiltily at her brother. The realisation dawned on Joe. "Erin… please tell me you never…?"

"I had to Joe!" Erin said desperately, "He seemed so… helpless. I went over there yesterday to try and talk to him and… he flung a vodka bottle at my head and told me to get out or else."

"He did what?" Joe asked sharply.

"It's okay," Erin added hastily, "Joe it's okay, the bottle narrowly missed me -!"

"No it's not okay! It's nowhere near okay! Erin, we've tried to help Ronnie as much as we can but he refuses to listen!" Joe whispered in frustration, "I mean God only knows how much we've tried!"

"I still think we should give him the benefit of the doubt." Erin said, determined not to give up.

"Give who the benefit of the doubt," Danny asked, appearing round the corner, putting his jacket on.

"Ronnie Clary," Joe said with distaste.

"What's he done now?" Danny sighed.

"Joe -"

"That bruise on Erin's head isn't felt tip!" Joe said abruptly, "It's not Nikki's handiwork it's Ronnie's!"

"I'll kill him!" Danny growled.

"Shut up both of you!" Erin hissed with a glance towards the hallway where everyone was gathered. "Now is not the time to turn our back on an old friend."

"No, but now is also not the time to turn our back on our own brother either," Joe said with resolution.

"What are you talking about?" Erin asked, confused, "I thought he was just shaken up."

"Nah," Danny dismissed, "It's more than that."

"Sweetheart," Johnny's impatient voice called from the hallway, "Nikki's falling asleep."

"Okay be right there honey!" Erin called back to her husband and then turned back to her brothers. "I'll talk to you tomorrow." She kissed them goodbye and left with her husband.

"So what do we do?" Joe whispered to his brother as soon as they were out of earshot.

"About Ronnie Clary?"

"No, no! Jamie! Danny, I'm worried about him, he's not sleeping well… he's got that haunted look in his eyes…It's been one month since the mall shooting. He spent like what? Half-an hour lying in his friend's blood? I don't expect him to have recovered from that after such a short amount of time, but damn it he can at least talk to us! We're his brothers, his family! He shouldn't have to put on a brave face, not after everything he's been through!"

"It's just who he is," Danny said with a sigh, "we can't fault him for that."

"So what do we do? Just sit back and watch him self- destruct!"

"No I said we'll just do what we've been doing his whole life! We'll keep an eye out for him and see what happens over the next couple of days." Danny said trying to calm his brother down.

"Right, sure."

"Are you off now or are you hanging around for a while?"

"Didn't you hear? There's a leak in my apartment and it's going to take at least two weeks to get fixed," Joe said dejectedly.

"Damn, so I guess that means your crashing here?"

"Yeah looks like it."

"Well in that case, uh," Danny dropped his voice to a whisper, Joe leaned in closer, "maybe you can keep an eye on our baby brother? See what's really going on?"

"Well, I was planning on doing that anyway!"

"I know, just checking bro," Danny said with a laugh before he bid his brother a farewell and then left.

Jamie who had heard everything from the kitchen and dreading the night to come hastily made himself a cup of coffee. It was going to be a long night.

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><p>To be continued...<p> 


	2. Chapter 2  Panic Attacks and Paranoia

Hey here it is - the next chapter! Thank you all sooo much for the positive reviews, it really sparked my confidence! This chapter deals a lot with Jamie's psychological issues and some Jamie/Danny arguments. Tell me what you think!

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><p><strong>Chapter 2 - Panic Attacks and Paranoia?<strong>

Jamie lay in the bathtub that night, letting the warm water wash over him. He sighed in relief. It sure was good to feel relaxed again. He hummed himself 'Teenage Dirtbag,' as he added more bubbles.

"Listen to iron maiden baby with me, woo… woo…" he felt himself drifting off in the warm, warm water.

"He lives on my block and drives a … simply kick my ass if he knew…" The water slipped behind his ears, he felt himself sinking further in the tub. "I'm just a teenage dirtbag baby like you…"

_He was back inside the Nintendo store with Jared, Dean and Josh when he heard the gunshot, it reverberated around him a million times, shattering his insides, he threw himself to the floor screaming, "No!" Jamie tried to crawl but his leg wouldn't move! A hand closed around his ankle, "Oh god, help!" Jamie tried to kick his captor but his leg seemed to just kick air. Dean pulled Josh to his feet and they hurried over to Jamie. He needed to get to Zoe! And Jared? Where was Jared? Why wasn't he with them? Jamie swiped at the air trying to stay up, he was floating. He was finding it really… really hard to breathe…the whole store was swimming with water… _

Jamie's eyes flew open; he had been thrashing around like crazy in the bathtub. He heard Joe banging on the door.

"Jamie! Jamie are you okay?" he called from the other side.

"What?" Jamie wiped the soapy suds from his eyes, "Uh, yeah I'm fine!"

"Are you sure? You were yelling?" He was? What was he saying?

"It's okay, I – I think I just fell asleep."

"In the bathtub?" Joe said worriedly, "That's dangerous, you could drown! What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing!" Jamie said annoyed. He hoisted himself out of the bathtub, "Look I'm fine, just go back to sleep okay Joe?"

"Yeah, you get some sleep too." Jamie waited until he heard Joe's footsteps disappear before he wrapped a towel around his waist and wiped the steam off the mirror. He could see the sheer terror in his eyes. These dreams just kept on getting worse and worse no matter how hard he tried to block them out.

Once he got ready for bed, he shut himself firmly in his room and tried to find something to keep him occupied but he couldn't. He had that prickling feeling on the back of his neck, he felt like he was being watched. He couldn't sit still unless he checked outside. Jamie knew he was being stupid but he just had to check. Very carefully, he prised the slits of the blinds apart and peered out into the darkened street which was held aglow by the auburn streetlights. There was nothing there except the murky bushes, a cat curled on next door's doorstep and…Jamie did a double take. A small car was parked right under the streetlight. The headlights were off but Jamie could make out a shady figure in the front seat.

He frowned, okay that's weird. Why would someone park their car randomly opposite their house at this hour? And why would they be sitting there unless they were waiting for someone or –

Jamie let go off the blinds as if it had burned him! No, no, it can't be him, he wouldn't be here would he? Jamie's chest felt like it was closing in, pressing down on him. He couldn't breathe! He slipped off his chair on all fours and tried to take deep, rasping breaths counting to ten until his breathing gradually returned back to normal. It was half-past eleven and he would not let himself fall asleep. He couldn't afford to put his mental sanity at risk just because of these stupid dreams.

'I'll just wait until a little more time has passed and then I can sleep normally,' Jamie told himself, ignoring the panic which was threatening to overcome him. He managed to read 'Jekyll and Hyde,' and write his book report.

"And so it is the true evil that is hidden within all of us that finally wins out eventually." Jamie read the last line of his report out loud and clicked 'print.' "Very true," he muttered. He checked the time, it had just gone two. His head was throbbing and his heart was racing, but he wasn't going to give in to sleep.

Jamie paced his room for a few minutes, tossing his baseball and catching it, remembering the many hours Danny had spent with him on their front lawn, teaching him how to catch. He even cleaned up his room a little.

Checking the clock he saw that it was almost three so he tried to read Great Expectations but he couldn't get past the second chapter without drifting off. No matter how much Jamie tried to concentrate, his mind kept wondering back to that night… he had to do it; he didn't have any other choice. If he didn't agree to keep his mouth shut then he would've been killed just like Jared. He did what was asked of him didn't he? So why was he losing so much sleep over it? Not only did he have his own, but also his whole family's reputation to protect. That still didn't stop him from feeling like a total coward.

The Sniper ruined his life in more ways than one. Not only had he murdered seventeen people, including his friend and injured over twenty, but now he's dragged Jamie into his mess, forcing him to become a traitor to his own family. Nobody knew who the sniper was except Jamie, Dean and Jared. And nobody had ever seen a massacre coming, especially a year after Columbine and in New York City, where the place is literally crawling with cops.

A small gleam of daylight peeked from the rims of his blinds; Jamie tried to read a few more lines, five minutes later, his head slammed on his book…

_People were screaming, running around in terror, crawling on the floor trying to find a safe hiding place. Dean raced past him, he screamed at him to hurry up! Jamie just stood there, rooted to the spot, he couldn't move, no matter how much he wanted to! These people were dying! What's wrong with him? He was Reagan, and Reagan's are fearless! Right?_

"_JAMIE!" Jared's face swum before him in terror, he tried to grab onto his hand but he couldn't. _

"_I can't see him, where is he?" Jamie cried._

"_Jamie…" Jared's face was contorted with desperation, "We have to tell the truth!"_

"_I can't do that he'll kill us!" Jamie screamed in horror. Another shot was heard!_

"_Tell the truth!"_

"_Jared… I'm sorry, I'm so sorry but I can't tell anyone!" Jamie wept._

"_You can't let me di -!" He heard a gunshot followed by a shrill scream…_

Jamie's eyes snapped open as his alarm clock which he strategically placed next to him rang penetratingly through his brain. He groaned and smacked it but it wouldn't shut up so he picked it up and hurled it across the room.

"Jamie!" he heard his father coming down the hallway to his room. Very quickly, Jamie closed his book and jumped inside his bed. Frank opened his door, he was buttoning up his shirt and had his tie slung loosely round his neck. "Wake up, time for school!"

"Okay, I'm up! I'm up!" Jamie said, messing his hair up slightly.

"Get dressed quickly if you're catching a ride with Dean." Frank left quickly and started yelling at Joe to get up. Dean. Right. Jamie remembered his dream vividly.

_**June 7th 2000**_

Jamie splashed cold water on his face about ten times to wipe the non-sleep out of his eyes. He stared at himself in the mirror, not really thinking about anything… just staring… The Sniper's menacing face flashed behind him! Jamie whipped round and grabbed the razor instinctively as a weapon. Only the bathtub was behind him, The Sniper wasn't there. Jamie could've sworn he saw him peering in through the window... he took a deep breath, his heart was thumping madly. Sighing with relief and humiliation Jamie got dressed and went down to breakfast, his ears ringing. He took great care not to let his deliberate lack of sleep and paranoia show. He entered the kitchen and turned the volume of the radio right up to drown out the ringing in his ears, before pouring himself a large mug of coffee. Mary immediately turned the radio down, phone balanced in one ear and a hamper of washing on one hip. She poured herself some coffee one handed and sighed.

"No Ma I haven't…well it's like I told you yesterday the charity auction is this weekend and I have a lot of stuff to do before then… yes I know he wants to see - okay don't exaggerate Ma! Hold on,"

Mary turned her attention to her youngest son who was fishing inside the cereal box for a prize.

"Jamie," she said hurriedly, "I'm working late at the hospital tonight and your father's also working so it's just gonna be you and Joe. There's some mac and cheese in the fridge just heat it up. Homework done after dinner, no staying up too late do you understand?" Jamie, his mind still on the face in the mirror just nodded and rattled the cereal out of the box just as Danny came barging in through the back door.

"Morning mother, little brother!" he said cheerfully, nodding at each of them.

"Hey!" Jamie greeted.

"Wipe your feet Daniel," Mary ordered sternly.

"Yes mam!" Danny mock saluted his mother as he wiped his feet on the mat.

"And knock off the cheek!" she added strictly and turned back to Jamie who was ferretting around in the fridge for some milk. "Are you even listening to me Jamie?"

"He's sixteen of course he's not," Danny muttered snatching up a spoon and taking Jamie's bowl of cereal.

"I said knock it off!" Mary quickly turned her attention to the phone, "No it's okay I'm still here Ma!"

"Aah is Nana stressing about Grandad's heart again?" Danny said shaking his head. Mary just nodded and rolled her eyes at him.

"Ma," Jamie started tentatively, with his back to her so she couldn't see his expression, "I need to talk to you about something I saw -"

"Not now honey, I'm on the phone to your grandmother and she's -! No, Ma I'm still here… yeah I'll be there in half an hour tops – well you live in the Bronx Ma, it's not – okay!"

Jamie found the milk and also to his annoyance that Danny had stolen his bowl. He tried to glare at Danny but his brother deliberately avoided his gaze, very slowly pouring himself some coffee from the pot. Pointedly, Jamie set the carton down and retrieved another bowl from the cupboard and slammed it down on the counter. Danny sipped his coffee slowly and watched him from the corner of his eye, trying not to laugh.

"Yes, okay Ma I'll drive him to the doctor personally!" Mary said exasperatedly, pouring the last drops of milk into her coffee.

"Do you always have to be such a jerk?" Jamie hissed, trying to tip the last dregs of milk into his bowl.

"Ooh! Touchy!" Danny teased. "What's up with you anyway? You're supposed to be the passive one!"

"I'm sorry." Jamie apologized quietly, rubbing his tired face. "Although technically you should be the one apologizing to me."

"Well you've said it now so ha!" Danny jeered.

"Seriously Danny, how old are you?"

"Okay love you too, bye Ma," Mary hung up the phone. "Jamie, hurry up and eat, or you'll miss your bus!"

"Actually Ma I'm catching a ride with Dean as usual."

"Wait, wait what?" Danny said through a mouthful of cereal, "Dean? As in Dean McGowan from next door?"

"Ma! Hey Ma, I can't find my clean shirt!" Joe yelled from the staircase.

"Well how many other Dean's do we know?" Jamie asked Danny irritably, "We've only been neighbours, oh, I dunno, my whole life…"

"How many times? It's on your bed!" Mary yelled back, wiping her hands on her apron and hurrying out of the kitchen.

Danny turned back to his brother and surveyed him. "Why would you still want to hang out with Dean? I heard that after the – you know, he totally flipped out."

"He's not the only one," Jamie mumbled shamefully.

"What'd you say?" Danny asked leaning in. Crap! I didn't know he heard me, Jamie thought, desperately trying to find and excuse and not let it show on his face.

"What? I didn't say anything."

"Yeah. You did. You said he's not the only one… Jamie," Danny moved his chair closer to his brother who backed away, "Is something wrong?"

"No!" Jamie snapped again, "God," he ran his hand frantically through his hair, "I just wanna catch a ride to school with my friend, so what's your frigging problem!" he put on his jock jacket and hastily packed his bag.

"My frigging problem is that I've seen that kid down at the station more times this past couple of weeks than I see my wife in a month!" Danny said jabbing his spoon at his brother.

"Everything always has to be so dramatic with you!" Jamie said exasperatedly, "Why do you always have to be so protective? You've known Dean since he was like, three!"

"I don't care. People change. And he's not the kind of person I want my little brother hanging around with." Danny said indifferently, turning back to his cereal. "He's a bad influence on you."

"I think he's cool!"

"I think he's a douchebag!"

Jamie was just about to retort when a dark figure quickly dashed past his eye! He immediately turned round and grabbed onto the chair for support. Danny, completely oblivious to his brother's strange behaviour just carried on eating and rambling. Then Jamie saw him. Standing outside, just gazing through the window into the bright kitchen. The Sniper! No, it – it can't be that's crazy! He would never show his face here! I didn't do anything, Jamie thought frantically, I never said a word! Not one word!

"And you know what else kid," Danny continued, munching his cereal, oblivious to Jamie's sudden behaviour, "one of these days, and believe me this day will be sooner than you think, you're gonna remember this conversation and think, damn, my big brother Danny was right about everything I ever thought was… Jamie?"

Jamie stood frozen to the spot, his eyes fixated on the window, he looked paralyzed with fear. Danny slowly rose to his feet, eyes glued to his brother's.

"Jamie?" he placed a hand on his shoulder, he felt it trembling. "Kid?"

Jamie blinked, hard…praying he would go away… please go away, please go away… Jamie opened his eyes, the figure had gone. Had he been here? Or was it all in his imagination?

"Jamie what the hell is going on?" Danny demanded belligerently, a horn hooted twice in the distance.

"Jamie!" Mary called from upstairs, "Dean's here!"

"Danny I gotta go," Jamie grabbed his bag and tried to head out of the kitchen but Danny held his arm.

"No kid, you're not getting away from me that easily and you're definitely not riding to school with that delinquent, I'm driving you."

"What? Don't be so stupid -!"

"This ain't up for negotiation!" Danny interrupted loudly. Jamie backed down, knowing it was pointless to argue with Danny. "Now go tell him- no on second thought," Danny took his jacket off the back of the seat and put it on, "we'll tell him together, let's go," he said frogmarching a sullen Jamie to the front door.

"Hey, you guys off?" Joe greeted coming down the stairs and buttoning his wrist cuffs.

"Yep, I'm taking our kid brother to school today," Danny said simply. Jamie just glared at him.

"Really?" Joe asked in surprise, "what about work aren't you supposed to be on a case, junior Detective?" Dean hooted the car again, impatiently.

"Postponed," Danny muttered, opening the door and ushering Jamie out. They walked towards Dean's car but Dean was too busy rocking along to the radio to notice Danny. With some reluctance, Jamie tapped the window; Dean rolled it down and nodded at his friend.

"About time! How long does it take you to put all that make-up on?"

"Same as you!" Jamie retorted, "Listen man… I uh, can't ride with you today… sorry."

"What? Why not? You got a better offer?" Dean asked cockily.

"Actually yeah," Danny said casually, appearing out of nowhere, next to Jamie and leaning into the window, "me." Dean recoiled slightly and Jamie sighed with embarrassment.

There were a lot of people Jamie knew that were intimidated of his big brother and Dean was one of them. Back in middle school Jamie used it to his advantage all the time; no bully ever touched him after Danny Reagan, in all his rookie glory, stepped in. But now that Jamie was in high school it was embarrassing. Danny however, knew this and didn't care. In fact it only made him more protective if anything.

"Oh, hey Danny," Dean said meekly, "I – I uh, didn't see you, where did you come from?"

"Sixteen years and you still ain't figured it out!" Danny joked, "I got Jamie so uh you can go," he patted Dean's car, Dean immediately saluted Jamie with two fingers and tore off down the street.

"Well thanks for that," Jamie said with sarcasm, as they watched Dean's car become a tiny red blur, "are you done embarrassing me?"

"No, ain't even started," Danny opened the passenger seat of his car, "now get in." Jamie shot Danny another dirty look before he flung himself moodily into the car and crossed his arms. Danny tried to bite down on his grin as he shut the door, shaking his head in amusement.

The drive to school was not a pleasant one. Danny wanted to listen to one specific radio station and argued whenever Jamie tried to change the channel. "My car, my rules!" he said, slapping Jamie's hand away from the radio.

"I didn't ask you to drive me!" Jamie finally yelled after what seemed like the seventh time.

"Well maybe I should just let you walk to school, huh?" Danny responded crossly.

"Go ahead," Jamie mumbled, "it's a lot colder in here than it is out there anyway."

"Don't make me put the sirens on kid!" Danny warned.

"You wouldn't!"

"Try me!" They pulled up outside the school and Jamie was glad to get out. "Hold up kid," Danny said grabbing his arm and holding him back. "Don't think this conversation is over cause it's not, not by a long shot."

Jamie couldn't get out of that car quick enough. He breathed in the cool Spring air and hurried into the building.

Danny watched his baby brother run into the school, a heavy feeling settling into his heart. He slammed the wheel of his car, cursing. He didn't mean to argue and fight with him but Jamie doesn't exactly make things easy!

"So what do you think Shakespeare is trying to convey in the character of Hamlet, in this scene?" Mr Morrison paced the classroom and returned to the front, looking down upon the teenagers who were either doodling in their notebooks or gazing at the same page, either way they literally couldn't care. "Anyone?" he asked, a hint of desperation in his voice, "Anyone at all?" he spotted his star pupil who was tucked away in the corner of the classroom, staring out the window, a tired and worried look etched upon his face. "Mr Reagan?"

Jamie tore his eyes away from the calm blue sky and returned to the stifling atmosphere of the classroom. "Oh… uh, well this scene shows Hamlet out of control. It's the first scene where we really see the madness that has become of him. The way he behaves around Ophelia, a woman he's supposed to love…" he caught Zoe's eye, she smiled and turned back to the front. "Yet he behaves like a total maniac." A blur quickly dashed past him. Jamie jerked and squinted towards the hallway.

"Mr Reagan?" Mr Morrison prompted, his eyes following Jamie's frightened stare. Jamie blinked several times; he could've sworn that he saw a shadow lingering near the door.

The bell rang, signalling the end of class. Thankful for the escape, Jamie grabbed his bag and made a swift exit to the door.

"Jamie!" he heard Zoe call his name. "Jamie, wait!" he slowed down as she caught up with him. "Hey, are you okay?"

"No I'm not! Zoe, there's some weird shit going on here!" Jamie whispered desperately.

"What?" Zoe asked in alarm, "What are you talking about?"

"Not here," he escorted her to the Chemistry lab and they quickly sat down in their assigned seats. Jamie checked to see if he was out of earshot. Most of the kids were just talking or goofing around. He turned around to Zoe's bench, "Look, lately things have been happening, weird things that I haven't been able to control, I can't explain it. I don't know if it's all in my head or if I'm just being paranoid."

Zoe watched Jamie in concern, "Are you talking about the nightmares? Have they come back?"

"Yes and no. Just listen," Jamie quickly told her everything from the nightmares to the strange hallucinations. Zoe just stared at him, stunned.

"Yeah," Jamie could feel his face burn, "I know, you think I'm crazy don't you?"

"I – well, Jamie no," Zoe stuttered, "I don't think you're crazy I think the whole situation is crazy, it's insanely crazy!"

"What's insanely crazy?" Josh appeared next to them and took his seat next to Jamie. "So you ready for the test?"

Jamie's stomach flipped, "Test?" Oh shit!

"Yeah me neither," Josh said reading Jamie's expression, "but I guess I'm gonna have to bullshit my way through covalent bonds again."

Jamie slammed his head onto his arms and groaned. "How could I forget? God damn it! I was studying Spanish!"

"Spanish isn't till tomorrow morning. Dude, chill it's only one test," Josh said glancing back and forth between his best friend and his twin sister. "Am I – am I missing something here?"

"Listen to this," Zoe said, leaning towards her brother and filling him in on all the details about Jamie.

"That's crazy Jamie!" Josh said loudly.

"Shut up!" Jamie hissed, "And seriously, will you guys stop calling me crazy! I'm just trying to tell you what I saw."

"Yeah that's just it that makes it crazy!" Josh said pointedly. "You're saying you saw The Sniper looking into your bathroom one second and then you turn around and he's gone. Then you see him standing outside your house in broad daylight!" He dropped his voice lower, "When he's supposed to be dead!"

"I know, I know all that!"

"Josh, just cool it, I'm sure there has to be a logical explanation," Zoe said as calmly as she could, watching Jamie's face grow more frightened.

"The only logical explanation is that I'm slowly losing it," Jamie said, his face contrite.

"Maybe you should talk to the counsellor," Josh suggested after exchanging a worried glance with his sister.

"Oh, what a great idea!" Jamie said sarcastically, "I can tell her the truth about The Sniper and then when she goes screaming to the police, I'll dig my grave first, and then Dean's and we can both jump in together!"

"Don't be so dramatic, we're not saying you have to tell her the truth!" Zoe snapped with irritation. "Just tell her about the dreams and stuff."

"So everyone can wave goodbye as cart me off to the nuthouse? I don't think so!" Jamie replied annoyed.

"Yeah but Jamie, if The Sniper did show up around here, and I'm not saying he did but if he did, then he'd be risking a hell of a lot! He's got bigger problems than making sure you and Dean keep your traps shut." Josh said resoundingly.

"Oh yeah? Like what?" Jamie asked sceptically.

"Uh, like staying dead for starters…" he trailed off as he realized his girlfriend was already seated next to Zoe. "Oh, hey Kelli."

"Why were you talking about The Kings Plaza Sniper?" Kelli asked curiously.

"Jamie's been having nightmares about the guy and seeing him all over the place," Josh said casually.

"Thanks Josh." Jamie said sourly, "Maybe you could run to the Principal's office and announce it to the whole damn school over the PA?"

"Why are you bringing this up again Jamie? I thought everything was okay now," Kelli said in a serious tone.

"Is it though?" asked Jamie, whipping round in his seat to face Kelli, "What I did was -"

"The only thing you had to do," Zoe finished, her tone hinting that she really didn't want to talk about it anymore. "

Jamie glanced at all his friends. None of them seemed to care about this at all! Then again, they weren't the ones that had been threatened. They weren't the ones that were lying to their families every day. They could sleep peacefully. They just didn't understand the seriousness of what he had done! He was withholding information about a very important case! He had never felt so alone and helpless. His chest suddenly began to feel tight, really tight; Jamie grasped the edges of the bench, his vision getting blurrier by the second.

"Jamie?" Josh's panicked voice rang in his ears. "Are you okay?"

"I – uh…" Jamie took a deep shuddering breath and counted to ten again. His breathing slowly started to return to him. He glanced at Josh who looked stunned, "I'm okay, yeah." He muttered.

"Okay everybody in your seats," Mrs Calhoun strode in and immediately started handing round the papers, "names on the front, periodic tables are at the back, your hour starts now, good luck."

"Yeah," Jamie whispered to himself, turning over his paper, mind going completely blank at the first question.

Later on, Jamie sat in the back of History class, staring at the clock wishing it would just move. The classroom was hot, too hot. Even Mr Howard was fast asleep. Jamie tried to read the chapter on the Cuban Missile Crisis but he ended up re-reading the same paragraph five times. He tapped his pen on his cheek impatiently, tapping his foot, glancing at the clock. Much to Zoe's protests he had downed two red bulls at lunch and was feeling very agitated. He chewed on his pen, heart racing. Jamie bent down to underline a passage when he noticed to his shock, the red bloodstain seeping through the page of his textbook! He gasped in disgust as the blood spread onto the table and dripped onto the floor! He looked at his hands; they were covered in blood!

"Oh shit!" Jamie cried in shock, staring at his hands.

"Jamie!" Zoe's distant voice snapped him out of his trance. He glanced around wearily. The classroom was buzzing, and people were gaping at Jamie like he'd lost it. Maybe he had. He looked back down at his hands, the table, the book…clean, it was all clean! What? No…that's impossible, Jamie thought, checking the floor, the table, opening and closing the textbook and rifling through the pages about three times.

"Mr Reagan?" Mr Howard tentatively approached him, "Are you all right?"

"Sir, there was blood – there was blood, there was blood right here, right here on the book and now…" Jamie was aware that all eyes were on him. "It was here, it was – I saw – I swear it…" Jamie inspected the pages of the textbook again, "It was all over the book! And the floor!"

"Mr Reagan I understand if you need to take some time out-"

"No!" Jamie shouted. Mr Howard stepped back in alarm. "I swear to God there was blood everywhere –here - look!" Jamie flipped through the pages in a frenzy, "Where is it, where is it, come on…"He found the page and stabbed the spot with his finger, "Here! It was right here! Right here! In blood!"

The whole classroom fell silent immediately. Jamie could see everyone watching him in what looked like fear.

"Mr Reagan perhaps you should see the nurse." Mr Howard said sympathetically. Jamie stood up, rubbing his forehead, shaking and feeling stupid, knowing he had gone bright red. A few of his classmates whispered to each other as he gathered his things and left. He caught Zoe's troubled stare as he left the classroom.

Jamie stared back at her for a few seconds, and then he slammed the door shut, stumbling along the hallway and then sliding down the lockers to the floor. He took four steady breaths, wondering if he should just skip basketball practice after school and go home. No, that would draw too many questions. What was that stuff, was it really blood or was it just his vision going red. But then that message – what's going on? Jamie could feel someone watching him. He had that prickling sensation on the back of his neck; call it intuition whatever, he felt different.

The bell rang, shrilly through the school. The doors opened and students began spilling out into the corridor. Jamie swiftly picked himself up and hastily weaved his way down the hall to the toilets on the other end, desperately needing some alone time to figure this out. Jamie's chest started to tighten again, this time it felt worse. He doubled over and grabbed onto the sink for support.

"Help!" he uttered, but he couldn't even talk. I'm dying, Jamie thought fearfully, I'm being punished for keeping this secret… it was his fault Jared's dead and now he's being punished for it! Jamie couldn't breathe at all, he sunk to the floor, gasping for breath. He heard the door bang open, some laughter and Dale Timms terrified voice but… it was so distant.

"Jamie? Oh my God! Help, Mike go - get some help! Go now!"

* * *

><p>To be continued...<p> 


	3. Chapter 3  Danny's Tale

Thanks for all the reviews on the second chapter! This chapter deals more with Danny and Jamie together. Tell me what you think!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 3 – Danny's Tale<strong>

Danny stopped by the house on his way back from his shift, hoping to talk to Jamie some more. He passed his father on the way in.

"Hey Dad, Jamie in?"

"Yeah he's on the couch watching MTV," Frank said buttoning his jacket, "he was sent home early today."

"What? Why?"

"The school called, he had some sort of panic attack in the bathroom."

"What?" Danny whispered in shock, "Oh my God."

"That's not all," Frank continued gravely, "Apparently he had been hallucinating… he said he saw blood all over the place during History class."

"Dad! Tell me you're kidding?" Danny said in horror.

Frank turned to son in anguish. "I really wish I was. I think we need to get him some help Danny. I think the shooting affected him in more ways than we know. He's been distant, not acting like himself and he hasn't been sleeping at all. I haven't seen him like this in months, not since the day after the shooting."

"Do you think that's what's wrong with him?" Danny asked with worry. "The panic attacks… it's because he's remembering the shooting?"

"I thought it got better for a while but…" Frank didn't have to say anymore, just finished his sentence with a look.

"So why the hell won't he say anything?" Danny demanded angrily, "He knows how much we wanna help him!"

"I know Danny," Frank said placidly, "but between you and me, he thinks he can handle this all on his own."

"Damn Reagan pride," Danny muttered in a huff.

"Well you should know all about that!" Frank chuckled.

"All right, so I guess I'll talk with him… figure something out." Danny said with a sigh.

"If anyone can get through to him it's you son. Just remember that he's your brother, not a suspect in questioning." Frank advised sternly.

"I know Dad!" Danny said slightly offended, "It just makes it harder because he's my brother…I don't know," he shuffled his feet awkwardly.

"Danny I've been doing this job a long, long time and I've watched people come and go. It's always different when it's someone you don't know. You forget about them in time. But, when it's your own flesh and blood, someone who you've watched grow up, that protective feeling will always be there, no matter what." Frank clapped his son on the shoulder, "You're going to be a father soon and then you'll be able to understand everything I did and everything I continue to do for you and your brothers and sister, is out of pure good intentions."

"Thanks Dad." Danny said softly.

"I gotta get to work," Frank said with a smile, he was halfway down the front steps when he turned and called back to Danny. "By the way, don't be too hard on yourself for the static in your relationship with Jamie. I think it's actually because you and him are a lot similar than you both realize."

"What?" Danny laughed, "Me and Jamie? What are you talking about? We couldn't be more different!"

Frank just shrugged his shoulders, "It's just an observation. I'm just making a point, one day, years from now, that might come in useful." He turned to leave.

"Observation? What like a cop or a father?" Danny called out. Frank just tipped his hat and left.

Danny found Jamie curled up on the couch in the living room, just staring at the television, not really watching it. Danny cautiously sat down next to him. "Hey kid, you feeling any better?" he asked softly. "Dad's really worried about you."

Jamie tried to watch the guys from Sum 41 jump around the stage, he didn't want to talk to anyone right now.

Danny turned the TV off, leaving Jamie to just stare at the blank screen. "I heard about what happened in school today;" Danny said hesitantly, "Dad said that you were like this… you know, the day after the shooting." Jamie still kept quiet. "Is that what this is all about?"

Jamie glanced at Danny but still said nothing. Danny leaned towards him, "Jamie has something happened? Has something brought it all back?"

You don't even know the half of it, Jamie wanted to say. He wanted so badly to just tell it all. Danny nudged him, "Talk to me kid. Look whatever it is it's better out than in." Jamie swallowed hard, "We can talk about it."

"It won't help," Jamie suddenly moaned.

"It will kid. Remember what Ma used to say? Something about halving your troubles so you can share them ?"

"No Danny," Jamie sighed, "it was, a trouble shared is a trouble halved."

"Right, sure, basically you don't have to go through this alone." Danny stared at the floor for what seemed like the longest time before he finally said quietly, "I do know what you're going through you know."

"No you don't." Jamie said automatically.

"I do."

"You can't."

"I watched a kid die too. Remember the Dalton robbery, October 1996? You had just turned thirteen at the time. Me and my old partner, Louis, we were trying to stop a robbery in some grocery store in Midtown. So anyway there we were, trying to keep this – lunatic calm, he had this boy in a headlock and held a gun to his head. This kid… he was the same age as you were."

Danny tried to smile at Jamie but his eyes were shining. "And the whole time I just saw you. Held in that grip." Danny clenched his hand into a tight fist. "So there I was aiming my gun at the robber," Danny re-enacted the moment, using his fingers as a gun.

"He was holding a gun to the kid," Danny aimed the gun at Jamie's head. "And Louis was gonna tackle him from behind. I stupidly, signalled at him. The guy saw and… long story short Jamie… he blew the kid's head off and then shot my partner over his shoulder. It all happened so fast, I felt so powerless."

Jamie watched his brother tell his story, he wasn't ashamed to be honest and Jamie admired that. "That must've been… really hard to watch." Jamie said sensitively. Danny nodded, staring at the floor.

"Louis survived, but the kid didn't. I didn't even know his name until I saw it briefly mentioned in the paper. Luke Coleman. When it happened I remember it so well. You just can't forget something like that. I felt numb inside, and so alone. But you're not alone. You've got me," Danny said firmly, "you've got all of us. I'm your brother and I know we've had our moments but I would walk through fire for you."

Jamie swallowed hard over the aching lump in his throat. This was the first time in forever when he and Danny have ever had a deep conversation. Never would Danny have admitted that if Jamie wasn't in any kind of trouble. Danny thought that after he said that to Jamie, he'd feel very awkward and embarrassed, but honestly he didn't. Instead he just felt this strong, fuelling desire to help his brother and get the truth out of him.

"Tell me what's on your mind kid," Danny coaxed.

"I already told you, talking won't help!" Jamie whined, burying his face in a cushion, "Nothing can help me."

"Sit up," Danny ordered, "come on, get up." He tugged the cushion away from Jamie and pulled him up.

"No…I don't want to…Danny can't you just leave me alone?" Jamie asked wearily.

"No! Do you really think I'm gonna let you just sit here and wallow in peace?" Danny challenged.

"When have you ever let me do anything in peace?" Jamie retorted with exhaustion.

"Look, lying around isn't going to help either. I know you feel…everywhere you turn… you're reminded of Jared."

"Danny I really don't wanna talk-"

"And I don't blame you! After the robbery, I went walking down Little Italy to try and clear my head. Everywhere I looked, there were kids, boys your age, like Luke Coleman, running around, hanging out … living their lives, just like they should be doing. I just couldn't get away from them. Even when I was at home. Sometimes I'd stand and watch you from the window, playing basketball with Joe and thinking, that kid would never shoot another hoop again. And I felt so angry and so upset and I didn't tell anyone what had happened. Apparently, according to grandpa, it's ordinary to watch people die when you're on the job, no matter how old they are. Well it didn't feel that ordinary to me. I was Joe's age and only on the job a year. I just kept it all bottled up inside." Danny heaved a sigh and then continued.

"So I'm sitting outside this restaurant, with a huge glass of wine, and then this girl comes up to me, she must've been about twenty something. She said that she'd been watching me and I had an interesting face."

They both let out a small laugh. "Not handsome, or charming, or gorgeous but interesting. Anyway she turned out to be an art student or something and she wanted to sketch me. So she's sitting there with her sketch pad, I'm sitting there with my wine and I don't know what happened but it all just came, pouring out." Danny turned to Jamie, "Everything. She just sat there for a long time and didn't say a word. Then she said to me, that I needed time to grieve. And I told her; I said to her, I said, I barely knew the kid and it happens all the time in a cops world. That kid was a victim. She said no, he wasn't a victim. He was a person." Danny broke out of his trance, "Then she got up and walked away."

"Did you ever see her again?" Jamie asked, enthralled by his brother's tale.

"Yeah," a small smile played around Danny's lips, "so have you."

"I have?" Jamie replied in surprise.

"Yep. Three years later I married her."

"Oh!" both brothers laughed. "I never knew that."

Danny shrugged, still smiling, "Yeah well I never told anyone that story before. It seemed embarrassing for people to know me in such a weakened state."

"I guess it makes sense now. When you and Linda first got together I thought she was definitely not your type," Jamie admitted. "When you were in high school you had different girls calling the house every month. Linda just… didn't seem like one of them."

"That's what something like this can do. It changes people. And sometimes not for the better."

Jamie swallowed again.

"But my point kid is that Linda was just a stranger then, and I felt so much better after. Just letting it all out, after talking about it." He placed a comforting hand on his brother's shoulder, "And you will Jamie if you just talk to me."

"It doesn't matter," Jamie said, tears threatening to spill, he bit down on his lip and forced them away. "I don't deserve to be a cop anyway."

"That's not true!" Danny said, astonished by his brother's lack of self-esteem, "You'll be an awesome cop!"

"You're wrong!" Jamie whimpered.

"I know what you're like."

"You don't know anything!"

"You are an amazing person," Danny said soothingly.

Jamie just shook his head. "No I'm not." He wished Danny would shut up, he didn't know what he was saying!

"And when you graduate from the police academy," Danny continued, thinking he was making things better but unaware he was actually making them worse, "I'm gonna be there to remind you that you're just like all the other Reagan boys. Another boot in a suit! Jamie, you're gonna be one of the best cops in the city."

"I'm not good enough to be a cop! I'm not even good enough to be a Reagan!" Jamie spat, with complete and utter self-loathing.

"Don't say stuff like that Jamie!" Danny ordered, taken aback by his brother's disgusted tone. "Don't you ever say that again, you've had a shock and now – now you don't know what you're talking about!"

"I'm a traitor!" The words tumbled out of Jamie's mouth.

"No you're not!" Danny dismissed, after a very heavy pause. "Come here," Danny wrapped his arms around his brother and pulled him into a hug to shut him up, just like he used to when he was little.

"Danny get off! You don't know me like you think you do!" Jamie said through gritted teeth, trying to break free of Danny's strong embrace.

"Yes I do -"

"I'm not the golden boy you think I am! I'm a bad person Danny!" Jamie whispered, in a childlike manner .

"Don't you dare say you're bad!" Danny commanded. " I've known you your whole life and I know there's not a bad bone in your body!"

"But – but I've done a really bad thing Danny," Jamie sniffled.

"No!" Danny denied, trying to stay strong, "I'm – I'm sure that's not true."

"It is true!" Jamie said forlornly.

"Then what have you done? What could you of all people, have done that's so bad?" Danny asked trying to inject some control back into his voice.

"I can't tell you!" Jamie groaned. "I want to but you won't want to know me when you do."

Danny sighed in frustration. "Jamie, do you remember the time when you were about six years old and you accidently rode over a small badger with your bike?

"Yeah I remember," Jamie sniffed, the memory suddenly soaring to the front of his mind.

"You came running into the house, you were crying so hard, and you wouldn't tell anyone why. Then Joe and me found you in the tree house and you were still crying, and you kept saying you did something bad." Jamie nodded, "Then in the end you eventually told us what happened and you clutched onto my hand and led us to the badger. We found out that he wasn't really dead, he was just hurt. Can you remember what happened next?"

"You guys bathed him and bandaged him up!" Jamie said smiling. Danny nodded and returned the smile.

"We took you to the vet, he fixed the little guy up and everything was all right!" Danny said reassuringly.

"This is never gonna be all right though!" Jamie said panicking.

"It might be," Danny said decisively, "I might be able to make it all right."

"You can't!"

Danny placed a reassuring hand on his brother, "Either way, you'll feel a lot better if you talk about it. Trust me." Jamie didn't say anything. He couldn't. He didn't even know where to begin.

"Jamie, this thing that you did whatever it is… when you did it at the time; did you think it was the right thing to do?"

Jamie could feel Danny's cop stare burning into his eyes. He looked away and contemplated. "Well… I -I wasn't thinking straight – but – yeah I guess so! If you knew the situation then you'd know that I had no choice and it seemed like the only thing to do at the time-"

"Exactly! Exactly! So how can you be a bad person if it was the right thing?" Danny asked fiercely. "How can that little kid who could be so upset over a badger, a kid who begged Ma to let us keep the thing until it was better, could ever be bad?"

Jamie bit his quivering lip, "I don't know what to do Danny!" His brother hooked his arm around him quickly.

"Why what happened? Just tell me!" Danny demanded.

A wave of dizziness suddenly hit Jamie again, his throat was getting tighter. "I can't tell you!" Jamie leapt up from the chair and ran into the kitchen. He leaned against the counter, his back to the door, counting to ten carefully.

"Jamie…" Danny burst into the kitchen and stopped when he saw Jamie hunched over the counter. Jamie, without realizing it, just sank to the floor. With caution, Danny knelt down next to him and grabbed Jamie's head gently with one hand.

"Jamie I promise you that whatever you tell me, I will not think any different of you!" Danny whispered firmly, "I have watched you grow up! I taught you how to ride a bike and tie your shoes! Whenever anyone has ever threatened or bullied you didn't I make sure they never touched you again?"

"You're gonna hate me," Jamie warned again, trying to twist his head out of his brother's grasp.

"No!" Danny shook his head, "Listen, I might be an NYPD cop but I was your big brother long before I joined the force and I will be long after! So whatever you did, I am on your side!"

Jamie lent against the cupboard, feeling the hard wood dig into his back. He drew his knees up to his chest and hugged them. "I guess I still think back to that day at the mall. It was the worst thing I'd ever seen. When I was lying face down on the floor, listening to the sound of the gunshots and people screaming, all I kept thinking about were the good memories I had with you guys and how I thought I'd never see any of you again. Camping trips, birthday parties, locking ourselves up in the tree house every Halloween, the time you and Joe dared me to go into that -!"

"I – I get it, Jamie I get it," Danny nodded in understanding and sympathy.

"I know we always fight but I love all of you guys and being in that mall at that place, at that time was the worst experience of my life!" Jamie banged his head repetitively on the cupboard.

"Stop it!" Danny protectively placed his hand in between his brother's head and the cupboard. "Look, Jamie if you're worried about the Sniper, don't be, he's gone and he's never coming back."

Jamie felt his stomach plummet, his heart started to beat faster, he felt overwhelmingly sick.

"So what's been eating you kid?" Danny asked quietly. "And I want the truth this time."

Jamie took a deep shuddering breath. Okay, here it goes, it was now or never.

"Danny, there's something I need to tell you about that day. Something you need to know." Jamie said timidly.

"Okay!" Danny tried not to sound too relieved but he was glad his brother was finally opening up.

"Danny, Jared's death… it was my fault."

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><p>To be continued...<p> 


	4. Chapter 4  Shutting Down

**Author's Note: **Hey guys, thanks once again for all the reviews! And yes I know this story can be relatable to the terrible incident in Norway therefore I dedicate this chapter to those poor victims.

This chapter is an important, pivotal moment for the story so read it and tell me what you think!

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><p><strong>Chapter 4 – Shutting Down<strong>

"What?" Danny stared at him in astonishment, "What did you just say?"

Jamie saw the shock in his big brother's eyes and his heart plummeted. No way could he tell him the whole truth. So he decided to tell him half instead.

"I – I didn't protect him. I should've." Jamie gulped. He couldn't tell him. He felt sick and hated lying.

"Jamie, listen to me," Danny said desperately and he tried to turn him around but Jamie just couldn't look him in the eyes anymore. "Don't let him do this, don't let him win!"

"It's not a game Danny!" Jamie yelled, pushing his brother's hands away and fleeing for the stairs.

"Hey, Jamie!" Danny called out to him but Jamie just ignored him. He couldn't believe that he had come so close to spilling out everything. Once inside his room, he flung himself onto his bed, his hand automatically reaching for Fudge, the soft bear Danny gave him when he was three. He used it as a pillow, breathing deep, uneven breaths into its fur…. His eyes were closing…

_The Sniper saw him, he'd seen him! Oh shit, shit, shit! Jamie tried to run away but he couldn't, his legs were firmly frozen to the ground._

"_He's gonna kill me!" he screamed," PLEASE… SOMEBODY HELP!"_

"_Jamie don't move!" Zoe's terrified voice came out of nowhere, "Jamie… behind you!"_

_First he heard the gunshot and then he felt himself fall face first, onto the floor. His arm was leaking blood, oh god, oh no, this can't be happening!_

_Jamie couldn't breathe, he felt like he was going to die from the pain. Grandpa made out like being shot in the arm would be a small graze and you'd hardly feel thing. Jamie could feel every nerve system shattering… pools of blood was everywhere…_

Jamie shivered as his eyes snapped open. His arm was still throbbing and so was his head. He groaned and tried to sit up but a wave of dizziness forced him back down again. He counted to ten, eyes tightly shut, taking in deep, steady breaths. "It's just a dream," he whispered desperately to himself, "I never even got shot so - it's not real," he could feel a tear trickle slowly down his cheek. "So why can't I get it out of my head?"

"Get what out of your head?" Joe's voice rang loudly through the dark room, Jamie gasped, and flipped round and propped himself up on both elbows. Squinting into the darkness, he could just about make out Joe's silhouette, seated on the desk chair opposite him, casually tossing a baseball in the air with one hand and catching it in the other. A tiny sliver of moonlight draped across one side of his face.

"Joe? God, what the hell are you doing? Sneaking up on me in the dark!" Jamie snapped.

"Um, I wasn't sneaking up on you. I was already here."

"My point being," Jamie said exasperated, "What are you doing here."

"I'm keeping both eyes on you." Joe said in his cop voice. Jamie just rolled his eyes. Joe slowly rose from the chair and sat down facing his brother. "What's going on Jamie? I want the truth this time."

"Just… dreams that's all."

"Dreams? What kind of dreams? Is it about the shooting?" Joe whispered.

"It might be," Jamie said meekly. He shifted away from his brother, "Look, Erin said that what happened to me was a terrible ordeal. But you and Danny go through worse every day -"

"No! We never had to endure something like that when we were sixteen. It's different when you put on the uniform." Joe said firmly.

"How?"

"It just is."

"Yeah but how?"

"You know, my first day on the job… I saw a woman being hauled out of the canal with a baby. Obviously they'd been in there for some time. I dreamed about it for weeks, couldn't get it out of my head." Joe paused. "And then a few months later, I saw a man get shot. Some, gang war gone wrong, I can't remember. Point is… I didn't even bat an eyelid. It just became part of my everyday life. But that's a cop's life. You are still in high school and for a high school student; you held your own really well."

"Thanks Joe. But I still feel really... why did he have to do it Joe?" Jamie squeezed Fudge's neck, "Why did he have to murder all those innocent people? I know everyone always says I'll understand stuff in time. But this is the one thing I'll never understand - ever!"

Joe's face of concern suddenly twisted into a scowl of rage. "Jamie... there are just some people in this world that we'll never be able to figure out and this Sniper guy is one of them. It's so easy to just brush him off as a psychopath but really, he's soulless."

Jamie nodded in agreement. "I know. The way he shot Jared, there was no emotion, nothing."

Joe frowned. Jamie realized what he had just said. Crap!

"Be - behind the ski mask," Jamie added quickly, "I could just tell. And his voice... it was so cold."

"Yeah well, there you have it." Joe said grimly, "That little brother, is the world we live in. You know it's funny. Dad, Danny and I have spent your whole life protecting you from much lesser things. Like high school!"

Jamie forced a laugh but his heart was still thumping. Before he revealed too much, he decided to call it on their heart-to-heart. "I don't know what we'd do without you Joe," Jamie said sincerely. "You always know what to say to make us feel even a little bit better."

Joe smiled."Anytime, I'm always here you know that. Literally! I'm right next door! Sleep well okay?" Joe ruffled his brother's hair and left, closing the door behind him.

Jamie was struck by an odd, throbbing sensation in his arm and neck, he tried to rub it, but it hurt too much. It really felt like he had been hit by a bullet. He couldn't go back to sleep now! Jamie adjusted his pillows, flicked the bedside lamp on and carried on reading Great Expectations until the sun came up.

_**June 8th 2000**_

The next day, Jamie made himself two cups of coffee, ignoring the strong throbbing pain in his arm and neck which had now spread to his chest. He heard Dean impatiently hooting outside, taking it as his cue to leave; he gathered up his stuff and ran out the front door.

"Whoa," Jamie said in surprise as he hopped into Dean's car, "you look like you haven't -"

"Slept in days," he nodded with a weak smile and then pulled out of the driveway, "that's because I haven't."

"You too huh," Jamie said with sympathy, "I know exactly how you feel."

"Yeah, about that," Dean started hesitantly, "I can't believe you're even coming in to school, after what happened yesterday."

"Oh," Jamie said embarrassed, "you heard about that did you?"

"I was there dumbass remember? I saw you flipping out all over the place!" Dean said laughing.

"Yeah," Jamie said blushing slightly, "well, yesterday seems like one big…blur."

"So, you didn't see the blood?" Dean asked.

Jamie turned to him curiously."Why do you wanna know?"

"I guess maybe because messed up stuff has been happening to me too," Dean said with a shrug.

"Really?" Jamie asked intrigued, "You don't – get like – nightmares and stuff do you?" Dean glanced sideways, at his childhood friend.

"I might do. Do you?"

"I asked you first!"

"Well I asked you second!"

Jamie sighed. "Maybe. Maybe I've been having these nightmares about The Sniper… and that day at the mall. And maybe I've been thinking a lot about Jared. And the role we played that night." He looked straight over to Dean who was quiet for a few seconds. "And are still doing."

"We're doing what we have to do," Dean said softly yet firm.

"Yeah but at what price?" Jamie tried to stop his voice from shaking, "I mean, I'm not sleeping, I can't eat, my grades are messed up. Every time I close my eyes it's like he's watching me and I don't know how to get rid of it!"

"I heard sleeping helps," Dean suggested simply.

"You know what," Jamie said with annoyance, "if you're not prepared to take any of this seriously then don't but please don't think that I'm gonna -"

"Who says I'm not taking any of this seriously! I'm only thinking of the long term effects of this whole insomnia thing."

"You've lost me."

"I researched it last night. Sleep deprivation. There's only so much time that a person can stay awake. If they go with more than forty-eight hours of sleep then their body starts to shut down in order to re-charge itself." Dean explained.

"Re-charge? You make it sound like we're batteries or something." Jamie laughed and shifted in his seat. Dean glanced at him again.

"What's up?" he asked very obviously.

"Nothing," Jamie answered back, "just feeling a little – you know…"

"Irritable? Yeah that's one of the many, many symptoms of the shutdown process. Along with hallucinations, periorbital puffiness which is basically your panda eyes, aching muscles, memory loss, hand tremors, you name it." They were silent for a few seconds.

"Dean," Jamie asked tentatively, "what happens after your body shuts down and it starts to… re-charge itself?"

"You fall into a coma." Dean stated after a while. Jamie's heart sank.

"A coma huh? For how long?"

"Nobody knows how long it can last."

They didn't say another word to each other until they arrived at school.

Jamie shoved his school books into his locker, trying to gain some control of his unsteady hands. A hand grabbed his shoulder! Jamie jumped in shock and stumbled round, sliding against the locker.

"Whoa!" Josh held his hands up, "Hey, are you okay?"

Jamie swore in relief and gave his best friend a quick shove, "No! You don't just creep up on people! Why does everyone keep doing that to me?"

"Umm, maybe they're not… maybe it's all in your head?" Josh said daringly.

Jamie shot him a cautionary look. "Don't Josh okay?" He slammed his locker shut, "Just don't."

"Honestly I'm surprised you're even in school!" Josh continued with concern, echoing Dean. "After what happened yesterday."

"I'm not gonna let him win!" Jamie said angrily, storming off to Algebra, "If I do that then that means I'm his next victim!"

"Yeah, but, okay hold up!" Josh hurried after him.

"I don't know how long I can keep up this pretence!" Jamie whispered, afraid.

"Pretence?"

"They're gonna hate me!"

"Jamie," Josh grabbed his shoulder and forced him to slow down, "I think deep, deep, down you know that no matter what happens, your family will take your side over the law any day. And if, it'll never happen, but if they ever didn't, Danny's probably the only one out of all of them who will fight in your corner. Hell he'll probably even want to fight your fight himself!"

"That's not what I mean," Jamie said worriedly as the entered the classroom and sat down. He leaned across the desk to talk to him. "Dean and I…We know exactly what he looks like and the only reason we're keeping it to ourselves is because he threatened to kill us in our beds."

"Jamie that could just be emotional blackmail…" Josh' voice was becoming a strange buzzing sound; his face began to waver before him. He was talking to him, his lips were moving and his expression was tense but Jamie found it hard to hear what he was saying. As the bell rang shrilly, Jamie rubbed his tired face and settled into his seat, wishing that this aching feeling in his arm would subside.

It hadn't even been five minutes into the lesson, until the class had slipped into their sleepy composure. Jamie yawned and tried to concentrate on the problem Mr Chalk was scribbling on the board. Algebra was definitely not the class to be in if you were trying to stay awake, Jamie thought bitterly, his eyes growing heavier and heavier.

He glanced up at the board and to his utter horror he saw The Sniper peering in through the classroom window! Jamie blinked several times and frantically looked around the classroom. Everyone was just gazing at the front, each of them mirroring the same bored expression, including Josh and Dean. They couldn't see him. Jamie swivelled round to the front and shut his eyes tight, "I'm asleep," he muttered. "He's just a hallucination, he's not real, he's not real! I need to wake up. I'm going to wake up and he'll be gone." His head was spinning and his muscles started to tighten, he almost gasped in pain. "Wake up!" he begged, "come on, come on, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up, wake up…"

BANG! One gunshot was all it took, everybody scrambled over each other to fight their way to the nearest exit. The Sniper took aim again and fired, Jamie turned and tried to grab the gun, but The Sniper just backhanded him with it. Jamie was falling, falling, falling through the floor…

"AAAAARRGGHH!" Jamie screamed, the classroom all jumped and gasped in complete shock.

"Mr Reagan, are you all right?" Mr Chalk's alarmed voice brought Jamie back round. His heavy breathing was almost subsided, he felt his body, to check it wasn't broken from the fall... Jamie gazed sheepishly around the room; everyone was staring at him in unease except for Josh who looked terrified. He caught Dean's eye.

"What the hell?" he mouthed in infuriation. All Jamie could do was shrug. A sharp searing pain stabbed across his heart, and then his abdomen, he gasped and doubled up.

"M -Mr Chalk," he stammered in a shaky voice, "I – I need to be excused."

"Of course, of course," Mr Chalk said sensitively, "off you go."

"Thanks," Jamie shoved his books in his bag and quickly headed towards the door, avoiding eye contact.

"Reagan's gonna be sick!" Gabe Trotter hollered after him, a few people sniggered.

"That's enough Mr Trotter...!"

Once Jamie was safely out of view, he slumped against the nearest lockers and sunk to the floor, clutching his side in pain. He remembered the last time he was in this position… why does he always have to end up here! Another bolt of pain shot through his body as he tried to stand up. He moaned and grabbed onto the locker for support, his legs shaking.

Things got progressively worse as the day wore on. Jamie couldn't focus at all, in any of his classes. His muscles were beginning to give in and it took all the little strength he had left, to keep himself together. In Biology class his hand was shaking so much, he accidently beheaded the frog he was supposed to be disecting. Whenever anyone asked him what was wrong, he just brushed them off and told them it was nothing. Even at basketball practice they had to keep stopping because Jamie was feeling too dizzy so the coach sent him home early.

Jamie stumbled into the house, clutching his head; he needed something to make it stop spinning. "Ma!" he called, "Ma, do we have any aspirin?"

"Jamie?" Mary emerged from the kitchen wiping her hands on a dishtowel, "You home already?" she glanced at her watch.

"Practice finished early today." Jamie lied.

"Sweetie are you sure you okay?" Mary asked her youngest with concern, gazing upon his thin, pale face.

"Sure Ma," Jamie tried to smile, "I'm uh- just tired that's all."

"Well try and get some sleep then! Honestly, I don't know what's wrong with you kids! I'm on my way to the hospital for my shift; Erin and Joe are in the kitchen if you need anything." She grabbed her coat and headed out. Jamie started to walk towards the kitchen, and then he heard Joe angrily mention Ronnie Clary. Jamie stopped short. Ronnie Clary… of course.

For as long as Jamie could remember, Erin and Joe always kept in contact with the youngest Clary. When they were kids, Danny, Erin and Joe occasionally used to hang out with the Clary's but Jamie was too young. Instead he hung around with the other kids in the neighbourhood, his age, like Dean and Kelli… and Jared. The Clary's lived right next door to Kelli and she used to swear she heard screaming coming from the basement. Jamie, Josh and Dean then overheard Danny telling one of his friends that Mr Clary called his youngest son Cellar Boy because he had moved into the basement. During those days of pre-adolescent summers, Jamie and the other kids used to make up stories about Ronnie Clary. Jared always went around saying that he was a monster who used to eat children if they ever walked past the house. Until Joe found out and furiously confronted Jamie, telling him that Ronnie was an ill person who deserved to be treated with just a little bit of respect. Jamie didn't understand why Joe was so upset until now. Everybody was probably saying the same thing about him behind his back. Jamie Reagan, the lunatic. But deep down they don't realize that he's sick too. Jamie couldn't deal with his siblings right now so he headed for his room.

The sharp pain struck across his stomach again, he gasped out in pain and clutched his side, leaning onto the bannister for support. He continued up the stairs, the pain struck again, this time harder, forcing him to sit down and lean against the wall while he took several deep breaths. Jamie could hear the argument between Joe and Erin grow more heated.

"Joe, where are you going?"

"I don't know how much more of this I can take damnit! I'm sick of having to keep bailing him out every night!" Joe stormed out of the kitchen and marched straight past Jamie into the living room. Jamie seized the opportunity to creep back up the stairs and disappear into his room. He collapsed face first onto the bed, wishing the dizziness would just stop. Jamie took another deep breath; a wave of dizziness hit him…and all went black.

Erin finished feeding Nikki and shoved a frozen pizza in the oven. Joe came in and they made brief eye contact but they didn't say anything. She was still mad at him and vice-versa.

"I'm going to go and get Uncle Jamie okay, honey," Erin told her three year old, giving her a quick kiss. "I'll be right back, just stay there and finish your drawing for grandpa." She glared at Joe again before calling Jamie down for dinner.

After ten minutes she called him again. When she got no reply she stomped up the stairs. "Jamie!" she called indignantly, "Jamie! Are you deaf? Dinner's almost ready!" she burst through his door and laughed when she saw him sprawled out on his bed.

"Okay, sleeping beauty it's time to wake up," she nudged him. He didn't budge. "Jamie," Erin was started to get more irritated, "come on, I'm not playing around," she shook him more roughly, "seriously, wake up!" Still Jamie wouldn't move. "J –Jamie?" Erin said a little uncertain. She began to shake him even harder, "Jamie? Jamie?" Jamie just lay there, not moving at all. Starting to panic, Erin checked her brother's pulse, to her immense relief she found it weakly thumping underneath her fingers. She tried shaking him awake again, "Jamie wake up! Jamie?" His eyes were tightly shut, he was breathing but he wasn't moving. He was completely unconscious. "Oh my god!" Erin started to cry in distress, "Joe!" she screamed, her hands shaking, "JOE! JOE!" she ran out of the room screaming. "JOE CALL 911! CALL 911 NOW!"

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><p>To be continued...<p> 


	5. Chapter 5  A Near Death Experience?

**Author's Note: **Thanks for all the reviews one again, I really apreciate it! This part of the story might seem cliche but it's supposed to be dealing with Jamie's sleep disorders which is really important for the next chapter so bear with!

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><p><strong>Chapter 5 – A Near Death Experience?<strong>

"Whoa, I'm halfway there, whoa-oh livin on a prayer," Danny belted out his favourite Bon Jovi song which was a guilty pleasure of his. He wanted to make a detour after work to see if Jamie was okay. "Take my hand and we'll make it I swear…" Danny turned around the corner of the driveway and was immediately taken aback by the angry flashing emergency lights of red and blue he knew too well.

With his heart hammering under his chest, Danny switched off the loud music which was now giving him a headache. As he crept up the road, his mouth suddenly felt dry. The ambulance was parked right outside the house but that didn't mean it was for them right? He pulled up behind the ambulance, peering towards the house, his heart sinking further when he saw the front door was thrown wide open. He could see Joe standing on the threshold talking animatedly on the phone.

The neighbours were all huddled together, whispering on the corner opposite the Reagan's house, watching Danny hop out of the car quickly.

It's Jamie. Danny thought, a cold feeling brushing over him. He shivered. Jamie's done something stupid, oh God why hadn't the kid told him what he'd done? Danny raced up the steps, taking two at a time, praying. Not yet, he can't die, not so soon after the shooting, please God, please!

Joe's eyes widened and he hung up the phone quickly when he saw Danny running frantically towards him. Danny noticed Joe's eyes were red rimmed and glazed with sheer panic.

"Danny! I was leaving you a third messa-"

"Joe what's happened to Jamie?" Danny demanded, his voice shaking with suppressed fear.

Joe narrowed his eyes, "How – how did you know it's Jamie?"

"Call it brotherly intuition; just tell me what the hell's going on!" Danny yelled, bracing himself for the awful truth to be confirmed.

Joe sighed. "I was gonna call you but I had to call Ma and Dad first, then the ambulance showed up. Jamie's unconscious. We can't wake him up."

Overdose. Danny immediately thought, his chest suddenly feeling very tight. His baby brother took an overdose and now he's dead. "What um… how did, uh…" Danny tried to get the right words out properly. "What do you mean you can't wake him up?"

Joe took a deep breath."About ten minutes ago, Erin called Jamie down to dinner and when she got no reply, she went upstairs to check on him and she found – she found him on the bed and he was, um, he…" Joe swallowed.

"He was what Joe?" Danny asked in a very small voice, it was barely audible. "Joe?"

"Jamie was unconscious. He wasn't moving at all. Erin tried shaking him but he just wouldn't budge. I was in the kitchen with Nikki when she started screaming for me to call 911 so I ran upstairs and saw Jamie lying on the bed. I tried shaking him, he wasn't moving, and he was so still… so I called 911. Ma wanted to come straight home but I told her it was no point, she might as well meet us at the hospital. Dad's going too, he sounded worse than Ma when I spoke to him."

"That stupid, stupid, stupid kid!" Danny roared in frustration, kicking the door. "How could he do this to us? To Ma? To Dad -"

"He hasn't done anything to himself Danny if that's what you're thinking!" Joe said firmly.

"You have no idea what I'm thinking!" Danny growled, pacing up and down.

"I do!" Joe retorted angrily, "You think I didn't think it too?"

Danny stopped pacing. "You – you mean…?" He stared at his brother with a tiny glimmer of hope in his eyes.

"There were no pills, or an empty bottle anywhere." Joe said quietly, "I checked myself before I called 911."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes I'm sure!" Joe snapped, "I checked him, under the bed, I even turned him on his back and tried to look down his throat! What do you take me for?"

Both brothers glared at each other. The tense silence was swiftly broken by the paramedics carrying Jamie down the stairs on a stretcher. He was covered in red blankets and an oxygen mask was attached to his face. Jamie's eyes were closed and his head lolled from side to side like a rag doll as the paramedics carried him down the stairs and hurriedly wheeled him out the front door. Joe followed them to the ambulance.

"Oh God," Danny moaned, glimpsing his brother looking so fragile.

"Danny you're here!"

Danny tore his eyes away from Jamie to see his sister running down the stairs. She flew into his arms sobbing.

"Ssh it's okay sis." Danny tried to soothe. "The ambulance have got him now, shh, they've got him. He's in safe hands."

"It was so awful Danny," Erin muttered, pulling out of her brother's embrace, "I walked into his room and saw him lying there, he wasn't moving and he wouldn't wake up! I thought he was dead for sure. Thank God I found a pulse."

They watched the paramedics lift Jamie into the ambulance. Joe turned towards his siblings and gestured that he was going to go with Jamie to the hospital. Danny gave him the thumbs up to let him know that was okay. Should Jamie wake up, Joe would be more of a calming presence than him or Erin.

"See, Joe's going with him to the hospital," Danny said reassuringly to his sister who just nodded in a daze, watching Joe climb in after Jamie, her eyes brimming with tears.

A car quickly pulled up behind Danny's. Erin's husband got out and ran towards his wife.

"Erin! I came as soon as Joe called me!"

"Oh, Johnny!" Erin left Danny on the doorstep and ran towards her husband.

Danny stared at the ambulance carrying his baby brother tearing off down the street. 'That's the last time you'll ever see him,' an evil voice in the back of Danny's mind teased. Danny clenched his teeth, his heart plummetting.

"Please God," He prayed. "Don't take him, don't take him! Take me instead! You can't take him! I won't let you take him!"

**_Ten minutes earlier._**

_Jamie stood in the Nintendo store. Dean tossed him a game, "Okay, how about this one?"_

"_Hhm," Jamie examined it, "nah, Joe has this one, he said the graphics are crap!"_

"_Well we can't afford anything else!" Josh said moodily, shoving his hands in his pockets. "All the latest stuff is either too expensive or too violent!" Jamie and Dean laughed. "I really need an advance on my allowance if I ever wanna get this one!" Josh grinned and picked up a box from the 'New Release,' shelf, "Blood Massacre III, now this is what I am talking about boys!"_

"_Like your parents would ever let you near that, it's rated R," Jamie said with a smirk._

"_Yeah," Dean said mockingly, "much too violent for their precious baby!" _

"_Hey! I'm Italian, violence runs in my blood!"_

"_Great idea!" Jamie said grinning, "Do they have any Mafia games?"_

"_Hey you guys where's Jared?" Dean asked, noticing he wasn't in the store._

"_I dunno," Jamie shrugged, "hey what about this, the new Bourne game? It could be fun I guess?"_

"_Hey guys!" Jared greeted, running into the store, a hot dog clutched in his hand._

"_Oh nice to know you have your priorities!" Josh chastised, "You drag us out here to find a game and then you run off to buy food – without us!"_

"_Jamie!" Erin walked into the store. _

"_Erin, hey what are you doing here?" Jamie asked in surprise. "I thought you were in the kitchen with Joe?"_

"_Jamie! Are you deaf? Dinner's almost ready!" she said straight at him. Jamie looked and Josh and Dean, they couldn't see her. "Okay sleeping beauty it's time to wake up," she pulled him by the arm._

"_Ow! Erin get off me! I'm not coming I need to stay here!" Jamie said exasperated. _

"_Jamie," Erin looked pissed off, "come on, I'm not playing around," she tugged him harder, "seriously, wake up!"_

"_I'm not coming with you!" Jamie said stubbornly. "I need to stay here and help Jared find a game."_

"_J – Jamie?" Erin said, staring at him uncertainly. She then grabbed him by his shoulders and shook him like a doll, "Jamie? Jamie?"_

"_Erin stop! Stop! Stop! I said I'm not coming with you! Jared needs my help!" _

_Erin pressed her fingers to Jamie's neck, her face etched in panic. She breathed a sigh of relief and then tried shaking him again, harder this time, "Jamie wake up! Jamie?" She studied his face, "Oh my God!" she burst into tears, "Joe!" she screamed, "JOE! JOE!" she ran out of the store screaming. "JOE CALL 911! CALL 911 NOW!"_

_Jamie watched his sister leave, "Why? I'm not going to die am I?" he asked Josh._

"_No," Josh said casually examining a case, " Hey, what do you think of this one?" he held up a case. _

_Jamie made a face, "Uh no I don't think so. That one isn't nearly as good as Ninja Wars."_

"_Hey can you guys hear screaming?" Jared asked._

_Jamie, Dean and Josh exchanged a puzzled look before shaking their heads._

"_What's going on?" Joe suddenly ran into the store followed closely by Erin. They both stared at Jamie in panic._

"_Now what?" Jamie huffed._

"_He's- he's not moving," Erin stammered thickly, her hands were shaking and she kept taking deep breaths. _

"_What do you mean he's not moving?" Joe asked, walking towards Jamie. Jamie could detect a hint of fear and concern in his brother's voice. _

"_Oh come on!" Jamie moaned, "Gimme a break!" _

"_Erin!"_

"_He's breathing, I checked his pulse, he's alive but he won't wake up." Erin stayed near the door. Joe just stared at Jamie._

"_Guys it's okay I'm fine!" Jamie tried to say but Joe crossed the room in two strides and started frisking him._

"_Hey! Hey, Joe stop it!" Jamie scolded, embarrassed, "Joe leave me alone!" _

_No one paid them any attention._

"_What are you doing?" Erin asked frowning._

"_Yeah, thank you!" Jamie said in a sulk. "I don't know what his prob -" Jamie was suddenly gagged as Joe started forcing his mouth open and looking down his throat. _

"_Something you didn't do! I'm checking for pills!" Joe answered angrily._

"_An overdose? Joe he hasn't tried to kill himself!" Erin hissed, "He'd never do that! Just call 911!"_

"_He's –he's clean," Joe said, staring into Jamie's eyes._

"_OF COURSE HE IS, JOE DON'T JUST STAND THERE! GO AND CALL 911!"Erin screamed._

_Joe jumped as though he'd been electrocuted and ran out of the store, Erin close at his heels._

"_This game looks like fun," Jared tossed a case over to Dean who examined it closely. _

"_It's my brother!" Joe said speaking very fast, walking back into the store and staring at Jamie, "He won't wake up!"_

"_I'm awake!" Jamie snapped, "Joe I'm right here! Look!" Joe just shook his head._

"_No, he's definitely still alive. I think maybe he might've passed out on the bed." Joe screwed his face up, "no he's not on any medication. Well not that I know of! I –I don't know, only he can answer those questions but he's unconcious!" Joe walked back out._

_The store wavered slightly. Jamie's vision was becoming more clearer. The people in the store were becoming clearer and Joe and Erin who had just appeared by the door were becoming more and more blurry. Their voices were becoming a mere whisper, Jamie couldn't hear them. Then they gradually faded out completely._

_Jamie shrugged and carried on searching for a game. The boys spent a good two hours experimenting with the different styles on the test screens, laughing and joking. Jamie thought he could hear Danny at one point but his voice sounded too muffled. _

"_Okay," Josh walked over to them with a case clutched in his hand, "I am positive that this one is the one for -" _

"_Shh!" Jared said suddenly, silencing Josh with his hand._

"_What?"_

"_Can you hear that sound?" He asked, frowning._

_Jamie could hear small popping noises which sounded like firecrackers. "Yeah it's probably firecrackers."_

"_In the mall?" Jared said seceptically._

_Jamie was about to answer when a man burst into the store, clutching his shoulder which was stained a deep scarlet. Jamie thought it looked horribly like blood._

"_There's – there's a guy shooting people!" he gasped, "We have to get out now!"_

"_Oh God!" Josh cried, shooting Jamie a terrified look. _

_BANG! The windows shattered, glass spraying everywhere, triggering screams and terror. People were pushing and shoving each other to try and get out._

"_Everybody get down!" Jamie shouted, grabbing Josh and Dean, and forcing them down. "Jared? Jared?" Jamie lifted his head up a few inches, trying to see if he could see Jared anywhere. "Jared?" Jamie's calls grew more panicked, "Jared! Jared don't do this to me!"_

"_Jamie!" Jared suddenly appeared in front of him. "Wake up!"_

"_What?"_

"_Jamie you have to wake up!" Jared begged, "Come one! Wake up!"_

"_I – I don't know what you're talking about!" Jamie said frantically, "I'm already awake!"_

"_No you're not! You just think you are! All of this is a dream!"_

_Jamie gazed around him, as soon as Jared said the word 'dream,' the people in the store vanished and was replaced by a steady beeping sound. Jamie looked for Josh and Dean but they too were gone. It was just him and Jared. A warm and peaceful glow began spread into the store which was melting into the auburn light. Jamie wanted to just stay here forever._

"_Listen, Jamie, if you don't wake up right now, then he's won!" Jared said fiercely, breaking Jamie out of his peaceful reverie. "If you don't wake up, you won't be able to catch him!"_

"_But I –I don't want to catch him!" Jamie whimpered, his memory painfully coming back to him. "I want to stay here!"_

"_I know." Jared smiled sadly. "But you can't stay here. You don't belong here -well, not yet anyway."_

"_Why not? You're here?"_

"_Uh, dead remember?" Jared said forcefully. He helped Jamie to his feet. "Come on J, try and focus on waking up, otherwise you'll be here way ahead of schedule."_

"_Jared!" Jamie gasped pointing to his best friend's chest._

_A dark red stain was seeping through Jared's shirt, spreading across his chest._

"_Oh that!" Jared laughed, glancing down, "That's good! It means you're aware that you're dreaming."_

"_But- but this feels so real!" Jamie exclaimed in astonishment. "Am I really dreaming all this?"_

_Jared shrugged, "It's up to you. Call it whatever you want. All I know is… unless you're some kind of psychic, dreams are the only place where the dead can talk to the living face to face."_

"_Are you a ghost? Or my conscience?" Jamie asked fearfully._

_Jared gave a hollow laugh. "Skip the clichés please J!"_

"_Cliches?" Jamie said annoyed "You're talking to me in my dream when you're supposed to be dead!"_

_Jared's eyes widened but he didn't say anything. Jamie wanted to tell Jared something but he couldn't. He desperately wanted to apologize for his tragic and violent death but the words just wouldn't come out of his mouth. It really was a dream._

"_What's going on out there?" Jamie asked as the beeping grew louder. "That sound is annoying!"_

"_Hhm," Jared looked up, contemplating. "My guess is that they're trying to wake you up." He smirked, "But they can't do that! Only you can wake yourself up!"_

"_But I'm asleep Jared," Jamie said pointedly, "I'm not dead."_

"_No," Jared started cautiously, "but you know you could die any second now."_

"_I know, I know. Lack of sleep means lack of oxygen to the brain. I get it."_

"_So if you knew all the damage it could to do you then why were you deliberately staying awake?" Jared asked with narrowed eyes._

"_Well," Jamie swallowed, "I guess it's all that guilt I have. And these dreams. I thought sleep was the one place where you could just forget about all the bad stuff in your life… but it just makes it worse."_

"_You need to face this problem, otherwise it'll get even worse," Jared said worriedly._

"_I know that!" Jamie snapped. "But I can't tell anyone without…"_

"_Without ending up like me," Jared finished quietly._

_Jamie heaved a sigh, "Jared I'm sorry. It's not just me that's involved, it's Dean too."_

"_All the more reason to get this guy!" Jared said angrily. "I mean for God's sake! You come from a family of cops! Your grandfather was the Commissioner! Your brother's a detective now!"_

"_I know," Jamie mumbled in shame. "I just want this ended with. I'll tell them as soon as I wake up."_

"_So focus. Try and block all of this out." Jared advised._

"_Okay." Jamie closed his eyes tightly; the steady beeping sound was getting faster and louder._

"_That's great Jamie keep going!" _

_Jamie opened his eyes, his surroundings were swimming, shapes and colours whirred past him. But Jared started fading away. _

"_Jared!" Jamie tried to call him but he was just fading away, disappearing into a bright white light which burned into Jamie's eyes. He shielded his face with his arms as the light enveloped him._

Jamie's eyes sprung open, his arms and legs were being held down by four people. Terrified he glanced around him. What's going on?

"Jamieson? Are you awake?" A deep melodic voice drifted towards him. "Yeah he is, okay back away slowly."

Jamie could feel the pressure lift off his arms and legs. He just lay there, his eyes wide and scared.

"Jamie?" A man with dark brown hair and the bluest eyes was leaning towards him trying to smile. "You gave us quite a scare there young man."

"Where am I?" Jamie asked, his throat hoarse.

"You're in the coma ward Jamie. I'm Dr Carter, I've been looking after you. You… started convulsing when you woke up." Dr Carter said slowly. "Your family are waiting outside, they're all really worried about you."

"They are?"

"Yes."

Jamie was quiet for a moment. Then he asked softly, "How long have I been asleep for."

"I'd say about four hours."

Shit, he didn't know he'd been asleep for that long!

"Why was I convulsing?" Jamie asked in a small voice.

"Well, we think you might've experienced a night terror," Dr Carter said simply. He hesitated. "Do you get night terrors often?"

Jamie nodded.

"What about your legs? Do you always kick a lot in your sleep?"

"I never used to," Jamie answered truthfully, "but only recently, it's been getting worse. I try and stay awake as much as I can because I'm too scared to go to sleep."

"So you deliberately stay awake?" Dr Carter asked with a frown.

"Only because I don't want to sleep!" Jamie said in desperation, "I – I'm just waiting for the nightmares to stop and then I'll go back to normal. I- I just gotta wait."

Dr Carter was staring at Jamie with the strangest expression on his face. Jamie didn't like it at all. He heard a gasp from the door and saw his mother beaming in the doorway.

"Jamie you're awake!" Mary cried, rushing towards her youngest. Jamie tried to smile at his mother as she stroked his cheek fondly. "I knew you'd wake up! How are you feeling honey? Better?"

"I'm uh… I don't know." Jamie said tiredly, "Better now I guess ."

"Everyone's waiting outside to see you." She said excitedly, "They're all very worried of course but you're awake now, so we can stop them from worrying! Oh here honey, let me arrange your pillow for you," Mary reached behind her son and started to adjust his pillows. "Now lie back, there, are you comfortable sweetie?"

She was fussing over him again. Jamie sighed. He was grateful for her affection but sometimes it just got too much. As the youngest he felt constantly suffocated by everyone's attention.

"Would you like some food?" Mary pressed, "How about a drink, water, juice, I know you must be thirsty -"

"Ma!" Jamie suddenly yelled, Dr Carter looked up in shock, "I know you mean well but please can you just leave me alone for two minutes!"

Mary looked scandalised. "Oh, okay," she stammered, "sure honey, if that's what you want."

"I'm trying to remember my dream." Jamie muttered in agitation. He wanted to remember it while it was still vividly fresh in his mind.

"You had another dream?" Dr Carter asked, snatching up his clipboard.

"Yeah. Jared was in it and he told me to wake up. Ma, I think Jared saved my life!"

Mary looked as if she were about to faint. "Honey, I know you've had a shock. But Jared's dead and he can't come back."

"I know that Ma!" Jamie said very quickly, "I'm just telling you what I saw. He – he told me to hold on and… stuff," he added lamely. Dr Carter and his mother were looking at him as if he were insane.

"Mrs Reagan I'm gonna need a word with you outside," Dr Carter said hurriedly, gesturing towards the door.

Mary nodded. "I'll be right back honey," she kissed Jamie's cheek again and left with Dr Carter.

Jamie sank back into his pillows. He couldn't ignore that sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach that things were progressively going to get from bad to worse.

He was so busy staring at the light fixture in his room, he didn't notice the sinister face which peered in through his window, watching him.

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><p>To be continued...<p> 


	6. Chapter 6  Beyond the NYPD

**Author's Note: **Hey, a HUGE thank you to all those that reviewed especially the one who reviewed twice ;) You know who you are! I'm in Florida at the moment so all I want to do is just write, which is why this chapter is so long! Enjoy! Oh and please review! :)

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><p><strong>Chapter 6 – Beyond the NYPD<strong>

Time in hospitals seemed to drag on endlessly. Jamie's family all sat in the waiting room right outside the coma ward, waiting to hear news about the youngest Reagan. Linda watched her husband pace up and down, knowing how much he wished he could be in there instead of his baby brother. Both he and Joe would exchange a glance from time to time, each wanting the same thing and kicking themselves for not sorting this out sooner. Danny was too agitated to drive so Linda drove them both to the hospital, and told him that he was a cop not a doctor and there was nothing he didn't do to try and help Jamie. Danny couldn't even listen; he just wanted to see his brother. Linda prayed that Jamie had the strength to pull out of this coma. She shuddered to think about what Danny would be like if he didn't. He'd be inconsolable.

Danny paced up and down the waiting room, rubbing his clean-shaven face, he just couldn't sit down. He felt useless; he needed to be doing something, anything. What was taking those doctors so long? Would Jamie ever wake up? When he arrived at the house and saw those flashing sirens his mind immediately going to Jamie and suicide… God, he felt like he'd been punched in the gut, all the air drained out of him.

Joe told him that Jamie didn't move at all in the ambulance, not even when Joe had slipped his hand into his and started praying. Apparently, Jamie's hand just clung on lifelessly to his brother's. When Danny heard that, he couldn't breathe or think. All he wanted to know was if his brother was going to live. That's all he cared about right now.

Danny observed his parents and grandparents, each and every one of them were trying to mask their fright with bravery. The last time Danny had seen them like this was when Jamie had been caught up in that massacre.

His mother was almost in tears; his father had his arm wrapped protectively around her and his grandmother. His Nana Nimah had her rosary beads clasped tightly in her hand, muttering a silent prayer. Both his grandfather's, Henry and Seamus sat opposite each other looking worried, Henry was rolling and unrolling a newspaper in his hands, Joe was leaning against the vending machine; hands in pockets, looking tired and lost.

"Joe!" Erin called, snapping the forlorn atmosphere. She came running down the corridor, looking over her shoulder, a carton of coffees in each hand, "Don't freak out but Ronnie Clary's behind me!"

Joe stared at his sister, half-shocked, half-exhausted. "He's what?"

"What? Cell - Eunice and Kevin's youngest?" Mary sniffed with distaste, still clutching onto her tissue, "What's he doing here?"

"With that boy's checkered history, do you ever need to ask?" Henry huffed.

"Grandpa!" Erin scolded. "He saw me downstairs and we got talking. I told him about Jamie and then he asked if you were here, so I said yes and then -"

"You did what?" Joe said in controlled anger. "Why did you that for?"

Erin blinked in surprise. "Be –because he wanted to see you."

"Why were you even talking to him in the first place?" Danny asked harshly.

"Because he's my friend!" Erin snapped back.

"Yeah and we have more important things to worry about like our brother coming out of a coma!" Danny retorted through gritted teeth. "We don't have the time or the energy to deal with whatever shit Ronnie Clary's got himself into now!"

"Stop it you two, stop it, just stop it!" Mary hissed shrilly. "I can't deal with this right now." She sighed, "I just can't."

"It's okay Ma," Joe said hurriedly, striding towards the exit, "I'll go and see if I can get rid of -" Joe stopped short, everyone turned to the doorway. Ronnie Clary staggered towards Joe, his nose heavily bandaged.

"Oh God," Linda murmured to herself, knowing exactly what was going to happen now. She watched her husband suddenly straighten up.

It was hard to tell who looked more pissed, Danny or Joe.

"H-h-hey man, what's -what's up!" he slurred before half collapsing into Joe's arms. "Erin said you were here and I really need to talk to – to you." Danny and Joe both turned to glare daggers at Erin; she had the decency to shrink back a little. This was the last thing they needed right now.

Ronnie's eyes were unfocused and his shirt and hair was damp.

"Ronnie you're drunk!" Joe said coldly. Everyone turned to him in surprise, including Ronnie. He had never been that harsh to Ronnie before.

"Only a tad bit," Ronnie giggled, "I only had one drop, man, I swear on… on… on my mother's life!" he started to laugh uncontrollably. Mary stood up and walked away disgusted.

"Really?" Joe said, rubbing his temple, his voice wavering thinly on anger, "You're – you're doing this now? Here?" he dropped his voice to a furious whisper, "With my brother in a coma!"

Ronnie started to mumble stuff, no one could hear what he was saying. Joe rolled his eyes, Danny shook his head angrily, Linda kept her eye on Danny, Erin's eyes guiltily flicked from Joe to Ronnie and Frank was carefully observing the situation while Henry opened up his paper and pretended to read it.

"Ronnie, how did you break your nose?" Erin asked timidly.

"Oh that," he snorted, "I was at this party and I fell into this swimming pool right, but guess what?"

"What ?" Joe snapped in waspish tone.

"The swimming pool was only half full and I dove in but didn't realize that it wasn't -"

"Okay you know what Ronnie," Joe threw his hands up, "I give up. This is it for me. This is the final straw!"

"Joe, hey, come on!" Ronnie tried to hold onto him but Joe backed off.

"No, no I'm sorry! I have tried to help you so many times and you've just spat it all back in my face!"

"This is it; this is the last drop I swear!" Ronnie stated solemnly.

"No, I don't believe you," Joe said sceptically, shaking his head, "I've heard it all before Ron! I've done nothing but try and save you, stick up for you and how do you repay me? By – by doing this!" He turned his back on Ronnie slowly, then paused and marched right up to him, his eyes brimming with tears and his voice shaking with controlled, supressed rage, "With my brother in a God-damn coma!"

"Fine, fine, fine! You're done with me? Well I'm done with you; you and your family, you're too stuck up for me Reagan!" Ronnie roared. "Always have been!"

"Hey, hey maybe you should knock it off pal!" Danny threatened, his temper bubbling to the surface.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, I was wondering when the leader of the Calvary was gonna step in, big brother! Ronnie barked.

The already anxious people in the waiting room were feeling even more unnerved, and as soon as Danny started marching aggressively towards Ronnie, Frank decided it was time to intervene.

"Ronnie," he said firmly placing himself between his sons and his neighbour's son, "maybe you should go home and rest okay?" Ronnie looked at Joe who deliberately avoided eye contact with him. Ronnie glared at everyone, cursed them all and left. Joe swore and kicked the vending machine, and then he rounded on his sister.

"What the hell were you thinking bringing him here at a time like this?" he yelled.

"I didn't bring him anywhere, he followed me, and he was desperate to see you!" Erin said, upset. "I -I mean, what was I supposed to do? I could hardly say no!" Joe didn't answer, just continued to glower at her. "It is a free country you know," she muttered into her coffee.

Danny laughed bitterly. "When it suits you!"

"At least I don't need to bully and intimidate my way through life," Erin said scathingly.

"Bully and inti –he was acting like a jackass!" Danny bellowed.

"He was drunk Danny!"

"Since when was that our problem?"

"It isn't not anymore!" Joe answered resolutely, "Let him ruin his life. " He crossed his arms and closed his eyes, "I don't care. I'm done with the guy."

"I cannot believe you guys," Erin said in incredulously, "I thought that especially after what happened to Jamie we could see someone in trouble and help him do the right thing!"

"The right thing?" Danny said with a sarcastic laugh, "Ronnie Clary wouldn't know the right thing if it bit him in the ass!"

"Enough!" Frank thundered forcing everyone to jump. "This is pointless. Like you said," Frank looked at Joe, "Your brother is in a coma."

"Yeah, sorry Dad." Danny said quietly. "I'm just wired. If Jamie…"

"Look," Frank said placidly, "we're all upset about Jamie so let's try not to fight with each other. For your brother's sake at least. " All the Reagan kids exchanged short, apologetic and half-guilty glances, "So, can we try not to bring any more trouble to the table okay? Not until we find out what's wrong with Jamie."

"Wherever there's trouble, there's a Clary." Henry stated without looking up from his newspaper. Frank sighed at him.

Erin bit her bottom lip to stop it from trembling, "You're right Dad I'm sorry. I guess… I guess I'm just trying to find some kind of distraction." She whimpered. "Every time I think of Jamie, I picture him lying on his bed, not moving. I really thought he was-" Erin couldn't finish. She pressed her hand to her mouth, her eyes spilling fresh tears. Linda placed an assuring arm around her and patted her.

"It's okay, it's okay." she whispered with sympathy.

"Dad's right," Joe said to his siblings, "Jamie should be our priority now. So, when do you think he'll wake up Dad?"

"Ask the doctor yourself!" Grandad Seamus said in his thick Irish accent, pointing behind Danny. Everyone swarmed around the doctor with anticipated looks.

"How is he Dr Carter?" Erin asked, wiping her eyes.

"He's awake now." Dr Carter answered slowly.

"Oh thank God, thank you God!" Erin laughed. Joe and Linda breathed a sigh of relief, but Danny and Frank still clung on nervously to the doctor's next words.

"But we've been observing him closely and have concluded that Jamie has Dyssomnias which is a broad category of sleep disorders characterized by either hypersomnolence or insomnia. The three major subcategories include intrinsic, extrinsic, and disturbances of circadian rhythm."

"Right, right and for those of us who use English as a first language Doc?" Danny asked with frustration.

"He's shown nine out of the seventeen signs of common sleep disorders."

"Nine?" Nimah whispered, her rosemary beads wrapped round her fingers.

"What are they?" Frank asked bracing himself.

"Well Bruxism, which is involuntarily grinding or clenching of the teeth while sleeping. Hypopnea syndrome which means he has abnormally shallow breathing or slow respiratory rate while sleeping."

"Yeah I noticed that when I went to check on him," Erin said in a small voice.

Dr Carter consulted his notes, "Uh, he also has Cataplexy which is a sudden weakness in the motor muscles that can result in collapse to the floor."

"That would explain his recent clumsiness," Frank said dejectedly, "Go on doc."

"When he woke up he appears to have woken up from a night terror or as we call it pavor nocturnus, a sleep terror disorder which is an abrupt awakening from sleep with behaviour consistent with terror. And Parasomnias which is similar, its disruptive sleep-related events involving inappropriate actions during sleep; sleep walking and night-terrors are examples." Dr Carter nervously watched the Reagans squirm at hearing this.

"Uh, he also suffers from Periodic limb movement disorder or as we call it PLMD which is sudden involuntary movement of arms and, or legs during sleep, for example kicking the legs. Also known as nocturnal myoclonus."

"He was doing this?" Danny asked his voice a mere whisper from shock. Dr Carter nodded regrettably and ploughed on.

"We diagnosed Rapid Eye Movement behaviour disorder which means he's acting out violent or dramatic dreams while asleep."

The shooting, Danny thought, the knot in his stomach growing tighter.

"We have Restless legs syndrome which is an irresistible urge to move legs. And last but by no means least," he looked up from his notes to the astonished faces of Jamie's family. "Somniphobia, which is a dread of sleep."

"A dread of sleep?" Erin asked, dumbfounded, "So he's afraid of going to sleep? How is that even possible?"

"It may result from a feeling of control loss, or from repeating nightmares." Dr Carter explained.

"Well he's been having a lot of those," Joe sighed, "especially after what happened."

"You can help him though all of this though right? Medication? Treatment?" Linda asked hopefully.

Dr Carter glanced at the floor briefly before facing the Reagans, "Actually…we might be looking at a problem more… psychological."

"I'm not sure I follow," Danny said impatiently.

"You may have to face up to the strong possibility that Jamie is mentally ill."

A strong, stunned silence followed the doctor's words. Everyone watched each other's reactions; it was hard to tell who looked more shocked. Both Betty and Nimah, signed the cross on themselves.

"Well…" Joe struggled to find the right words to say, "It's not like it can't be expected after everything's he's been through."

"How?" Danny asked, slightly aggressive. "How come it's a psychological problem?"

Dr Carter stared at Danny. "Detective, your brother has shown nine out of the seventeen symptoms. He obviously has severe post-traumatic stress and depression."

"We understand." Frank said in a tight voice. "We should've been monitoring his behaviour more closely."

"Hopefully now he can get some proper help," Dr Carter said as brightly as he could.

"Yeah, but - does he really need to be sent to the nuthouse?" Danny blurted out.

"Danny!" Linda reprimanded, "Don't say that!"

"It's okay Danny." Frank said calmly, "Can we see him now Dr Carter?"

"Maybe five minutes, he needs to rest."

"Rest? He's just come out of a coma!" Danny said incredulously.

"Danny…" Frank silenced him with a look.

"It's for his mental stability. Mrs Reagan is already with him."

"Does she know about Jamie?" Joe asked Dr Carter.

"Yes she does." Dr Carter led them to Jamie's room. Mary was seated at the side of his bed looking slightly stunned. Jamie tried to smile as his family entered.

"Hey you!" Erin said trying to return the smile, she immediately kissed him on the cheek, savouring the fact that he was now awake.

Grandpa Seamus clapped his grandson on the shoulder, "How are you feeling sleeping beauty?"

Jamie laughed weakly. "A bit tired." He answered truthfully. Danny hovered near the doorway, he didn't want to come in just yet.

Jamie felt so humiliated, watching his family gawp at him in sympathy. He wanted the floor to just open up and swallow him whole. Only Danny stood by the door, staring at him in curiosity mingled with worry.

"Jamie, we need to um, talk about we do now." Frank said cautiously, resting a hand over his son's.

"What do you mean?" Jamie asked, his heart sinking.

"Well," Frank sat down at the foot of Jamie's bed, choosing his words carefully, "the doctors feel that these sleep problems and these night terrors are something psychological."

"I know that, but I'm gonna sort it out for good this time Dad, I promise." Everyone exchanged nervous glances. "What's wrong now?" Jamie groaned.

"I'm afraid it's… well it's more serious than that son," Frank said sombrely, "You see, I think we might need to send you away… to..."

"You're sending me to the nuthouse," Jamie finished. Everyone fired a glance at Danny who had suddenly become very interested with the floor. Jamie just shook his head, "No, no you can't do this to me–I -I'm not crazy!"

"We never said you were," Erin said gently.

"But I'm only sixteen!" Jamie protested. "I can't to go to a mental hospital!" The thought positively terrified him. He'd only heard about those places and seen them, safe behind the wall of glass on the TV. The thought of actually being locked up with those people, living with them day and night sent a jolt of fear through him.

"They're not going to place you in an adult psychiatric ward Jamie," Henry said, trying to reassure his grandson, "you're sixteen so you'll go to an adolescent one. You'll be surrounded with people your own age."

"I don't care if I'm surrounded by puppy dogs!" Jamie snapped, "I don't want to go! I just need to sleep that's all! Since when did this become a psychiatric problem?"

"Since sleep deprivation can cause psychosis and other kinds of problems which make you feel like you're going nuts." Joe explained. "Not that you are!" He added hastily, catching the flash of hurt in his brother's eyes. "But this place will help you get better."

"It won't!" Jamie whined, "Please don't make me go!"

"It's not going to be for long sweetheart," Mary said smiling through her tears and stroking Jamie's hair, "It's only until you get better. You'll be out before you know it!" Danny cleared his throat loudly but didn't say anything.

"Ma!" Jamie exclaimed in shock, "I can't believe you! All of you!" Danny opened his mouth to say something just as Dr Carter bustled in.

"Okay, I think it's time for Jamie to get some rest."

"Dr Carter why do I have to go to a mental hospital?" Jamie asked childishly. "I thought I just needed to sleep!"

Dr Carter shook his head. "When we mention of sleep deprivation Jamie, it means that your body doesn't get enough sleep, it is similar to insomnia. There are a lot of causes about this disease, such as psychiatric imbalance, physical illness and torture. It can lead to a wide range of results. Most of people don't take care about this disease because they think it's just a little thing. Well, maybe it has no affect on your normal life first, but it will get worse and worse if allowed to proceed unchecked, even it could be life-threatening."

Those last few words created a chilling silence amongst the room.

Dr Carter held up a large syringe, "Now I'm going to give you something to help you sleep -"

"No, no, no!" Jamie murmured bolting upright, "I don't want you to!" The nurses immediately restrained him, Mary backed away from the bed as did the rest of the family, and they watched their youngest fight in horror.

"It's okay, it's okay Jamie," Dr Carter soothed. Jamie tried to kick someone but the nurse held his leg down. He felt the prick of a needle break through his arm and he bit his lip tightly. In an instant his head lolled to the side and his body went limp. Danny let out an involuntary gasp as he witnessed his brother getting treated like that. He couldn't watch anymore of this. He left the ward and went outside to get some fresh air… so no one could see him cry. A mental hospital? Jamie'd never be the same again.

Later that night, the Reagan's sat around the kitchen table with steaming hot mugs of tea in front of them. Linda had gone back home, so had Betty, Seamus and Nimah back to the Bronx and Erin had swung by her apartment to check on her husband and daughter before heading straight to the house. They were all going to try and have a civilized conversation about Jamie.

Danny paced around the kitchen table. "How could you not have noticed the signs?" he asked his family belligerently, "We're supposed to be cops here!"

"We didn't think anything was wrong!" Mary confessed.

"Have you all been walking around with your eyes shut?" Danny said scornfully.

"He was upset!" Joe said, "Of course he was but we all thought it was because of the shooting."

"Yeah, well had I have been here, tougher questions would've been asked," Danny chided. Frank entered the kitchen with the phone clasped in his hand. "Well?"

"I've just spoken to the doctors and apparently the night terrors are getting worse. They're going to keep him overnight and then transfer him to Corbel hospital tomorrow. It's a juvenile mental hospital which specializes in sleep disorders and it's up in Connecticut."

"And there was me actually thinking you were gonna be doing something!" Danny scoffed. Frank shrugged in defeat.

"That's not fair Danny," Joe chastised, "It's not Dad's fault Jamie's sick."

"Okay so that's it then huh?" Danny asked, glaring around the kitchen. Nobody looked at him. "We're just gonna sit back and watch Jamie rot in the nuthouse for months!"

"Stop making it sound like he's going to prison!" Erin said sharply.

"He might as well be! The amount of time it's going to take to cure these night-terrors or whatever!"

"We don't know that for sure!" Mary rebuked, "He could be out in days!"

"Oh come on Ma!" Danny snapped, "And what was all that, you'll be out before you know it crap? It could take months maybe even a year for him to get well! Why would you want to give him false hope for?"

"Better than no hope at all!" Erin said angrily, "You hardly said a word to him in there!"

"What was I supposed to say? Hey Jamie, sorry I can't stay and talk to you when you're half-sane only you're off to the nuthouse tomorrow and we don't know when we'll see you again and by the time we do, God only knows what kind of a state you'll be in, after they've poked you and prodded you and drugged you every night!" Danny barked.

"You know your brother's going to get all the help he needs," Mary said as calmly as she could before Erin could retort.

"But he's not even that ill," Danny protested, "he'll be locked up with real mentally ill people, head cases who'll try and hurt him!" Danny stood behind his mother, muttering in her ear, "Is that really what you want to subject him to? You want your son mixing with these kind of people? It'll kill him in there!"

"If he can't talk to us… maybe professional help is what's best." Frank said dejectedly.

"I can't believe I'm hearing this! Right, come on Joe; if no one else is gonna do anything we will!" Danny motioned for his brother to follow him but Joe just stayed where he was.

"Don't you understand?" he said quietly, "This is out of our hands, you heard what Dad said. They're gonna section him tomorrow! There's nothing you or any of us can do."

"Yeah, you wanna bet?" Danny challenged, then he snatched the phone off his father.

"What are you going to do now?" Mary asked her eldest wearily.

"It's not that late, I'm gonna call the McGowan's, next door and ask to speak to Dean. He'll know what dark secret Jamie's been keeping, he'll tell us what really happened that day. And then we can get to the bottom of this and help him ourselves before the guys in white coats come and drag my brother to hell." Danny started to dial next door's number.

"Danny no," Frank warned, "I don't like sending Jamie to a mental hospital any more than you do but like Joe said, it's out of our hands."

"The hell it is!" Danny yelled. "We're cops! It's never out of our hands!"

"So, what exactly are you planning on doing to Dean?" Erin asked in a steeled voice, "Sit him around his kitchen table and push him until he breaks his silence? Put the frighteners on him? I mean for God's sake he's a sixteen year old kid not one of your murder suspects Danny!"

"I know that! Look, I just wanna talk to him that's all," Danny said throwing his hands in the air.

"No, from now on we do everything by the book Danny," Frank said, dead serious.

"Oh, toss the book away Dad!" Danny said with indifference, "Jamie needs our help now!"

"I don't need to listen to this!" Erin grabbed her jacket and kissed her parents goodbye. "I'll be at the hospital tomorrow to see Jamie off." She told her mother comfortingly. She threw Danny a look which said 'just drop it,' and then left.

"I know it seems I'm overreacting," Danny started in a pained voice, "But call it instinct… or whatever, I can't seem to shake the fact that something is really wrong. Jamie told me he did something bad but he wouldn't tell me what it was. And whatever it was, it's clearly causing him distress. It's not because he's mentally ill Dad, it's because of something that happened that day at the mall and it's really bugging him. If we can find out what it is then maybe we can help him through it instead of him being, drugged and restrained every night."

"So what you think it might be something the police missed?" Joe asked. Danny shrugged.

"Maybe, it's worth digging into isn't it?" He said appealing to the table.

"The NYPD combed over all the evidence they had," Frank said softly to his eldest, "There's nothing you'll find that hasn't already been reviewed."

"Then what was Jamie talking about?" Mary asked, "Danny? What did he do that was so bad?"

"He refused to tell me."

"Aah, he's a kid!" Henry dismissed, "He probably snuck out past curfew or something."

"I should hope not," Frank murmured to his father. Danny shook his head.

"No, no it was something much bigger. You didn't see him, he was terrified!"

"Yeah and he fell asleep in the bath as well," Joe said, "I heard him yelling." He sighed, "I should've seen post-traumatic stress right away."

"Look guys, we can save Jamie from more trauma if we can piece together what really happened that day at the Kings Plaza." Danny searched his family's faces, desperate for some support, "Please just trust me on this one!"

"Maybe we should sleep on this," Henry suggested.

"We don't have time. Jamie's leaving tomorrow." Joe said forlornly.

"Someone's gonna have to tell your mother he's leaving tomorrow," Mary put a reassuring hand on her husband's.

"I don't think she could take it right now," Frank said emphatically.

"If we play our cards right, we might not have to tell her anything," Danny said seriously, hanging his head in exhaustion.

"I'll break the news to her when I get home. The best thing you can do in a situation like this is take it on the chin," Henry said modestly.

Danny's head snapped up and his eyes narrowed at his grandfather. "I don't think so," he said scathingly, "Haven't we had enough of your bright ideas?"

"Excuse me?" Henry said aghast. Nobody had spoken to him like that before especially not his own grandson. Then again, this was Danny and he was seriously amped up.

Danny pointed at his grandfather, "If your NYPD pulled their thumbs out and actually did their jobs properly all of this would've been avoided and Jamie would be safe at home tomorrow!"

"I'm not Commissioner anymore, I never even got to do anything!" Henry retorted.

"Danny -!"

"Exactly! Maybe if the SWAT team had been more efficient, then they would've caught the son-of-a-bitch before he escaped and drove himself all the way over to the Brooklyn bridge! All that bullshit about the public interest, that's crap and you know it! They didn't even look for a body!"

"The SWAT team did the best they could… he outsmarted us, no one knows how he managed to get out!"

"They should've, it's their job!" Danny slammed his hand on the table in frustration, "They had the mall completely surrounded right? Then he sent out a hostage and managed to break out of the mall and drive himself to the Brooklyn Bridge where he offed himself! That murdering scum died on his terms, not ours! Nicely done."

"This isn't all my fault!" Henry countered.

"And I'm the Angel Gabriel," Danny's voice dripped with sarcasm.

"Danny! Pops! Shut up!" Frank shouted, rubbing the sides of his head. "Jamie's an insomniac and you've got to get used to it. Danny how could you talk to your grandfather like that? He's done his best. You of all people should know what happens when this family interferes!"

"But Dad, he could've done -!"

"Enough! If you must blame someone then blame me. I was the one who let Jamie go out to the mall in the first place!"

"It's not your fault Dad, how could you have known there was a sniper on the -" Joe started before his father interrupted him.

"And if we had noticed what was wrong with Jamie sooner then we could've hit it on the head before the stress caught up with him!"

"Dad please just think about what I'm saying!" Danny begged, "Jamie is in trouble, the kind of trouble that can't be fixed in a mental hospital! Okay, I get it, he's depressed. But I think that maybe this secret he's got has burdened him so much, it's pushed him over the brink of sanity."

"I know I may be a lot of things," Frank said in a hollow voice, "but I tell you what I'm not… Kevin Clary."

Joe's eyes narrowed.

"I can accept that my son is sick. The question is, can you do the same for your brother?" Joe and Danny exchanged a sad glance. Frank stood up.

"Where are you going?" Mary asked in a jaded voice.

"Well someone has to pack Jamie's stuff." Frank ignored the eye roll from his eldest son and left the kitchen. As soon as Frank left the kitchen, Henry politely excused himself and left, briefly nodding at Danny. Mary tried to wrestle the phone out of Danny's hand.

"No, I need to make an important call Ma!" He pleaded.

"It's too late to call the McGowan's now Danny. And before I go back to the hospital, I need to call my parents to tell them to be at there tomorrow, along with the rest of us at one-thirty sharp, to say goodbye to your brother."

"But it doesn't have to be goodbye, that's what I'm trying to say!" Danny said, his voice quivering. "I know what I feel, this is our Jamie we're talking about, he never used to have night terrors or sleepwalk when he was a kid… I just need time -!"

"Give it up honey!" she prised the phone out of Danny's grip and placed it on the table saying sadly, "Someday, you'll learn that there are just some things that are beyond the control of the NYPD."

"The hell there is," Danny muttered darkly, watching his mother leave. The phone suddenly rang shrilly, breaking into Danny's unpleasant thoughts. Danny snatched it off the table quickly.

"Hello," He answered dejectedly.

No answer.

"Hello?" Danny asked again, more forceful this time.

Still no answer.

"Hello?" Danny practically yelled.

A deep rasping sound greeted him on the other end of the line. Danny frowned.

"Look if this is some kind of prank, cut it out okay? I'm not playing!" Danny threatened.

The sound grew louder. There was definitely someone there.

"I know you're there," Danny said impatiently, "I can hear you breathi -"

Danny heard a shift fumble on the other end and then the monotonous sound, signalling the end of the very short and very eerie interaction.

"Who was that?" Joe asked, entering the kitchen.

"I dunno," Danny shrugged, "I think it might've been a prank call, but…"

"What?"

"I don't know." Danny frowned, "Something doesn't seem right."

"Hey," Joe walked up to his brother and placed a comforting hand on shoulder. "It's been a long day. You're just tired and worried about Jamie. We all are."

"Joe, please listen to me when I say I know there's something weird going on here!" Danny hissed, a hint of desperation in his voice.

Joe rolled his eyes.

"Danny -"

"No, just listen to me! The Sniper is dead right?"

"Yeah, so?"

"So, what's Jamie got to be so worked up about? There's definitely more to the story."

"What are you saying?" Joe asked, knowing the answer.

Danny took a deep breath.

"I think something else happened that night."

"What?"

"Something only Jamie and Dean knew about. Something they can't tell anyone because if they do…then they're in deep shit."

Joe didn't say anything. Just stared incredulously at his brother. He didn't want to hear it but he had to. Danny didn't want to admit it but he had to.

"Joe," he whispered fearfully. "I think Jamie's being blackmailed."

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><p>To be continued...<p> 


	7. Chapter 7  Sleepless in New York

**LostandAlone22 - **Thanks for the feedback - yeah I actually did mean to write rosary beads but I added it last minute and rushed it. About the insomnia/mental hospital thing - i did debate for a while whether i should use it. I asked my grandfather who's a psychiatrist and he told me like a dozen times that they don't send people to a mental hospital for insomnia in england or america but they would for post-traumatic stress or depression which is a main cause for insomnia so Jamie'll be getting treatment for that. Also i needed to find an excuse to get Jamie out of the way for a while, so Danny and the family can work on the case. Jamie will also be dealing with issues of his own. Keep reading!

Hey guys here's chapter 7 - thanks for all your reviews it meant a lot! I'm still in Florida but I'm leaving tomorrow so I'm gonna upload this chapter before I go. This chapter is focused on why Danny is so eager to save and help Jamie. I always got the impression while watching Blue Bloods, especially in _'Smack Attack,' 'Brothers,' 'China Town,' and 'The Blue Templar,' _that Jamie and Danny might have been really close when they were younger but then Jamie grew up and had a mind of his own and started doing his own thing which pissed Danny off a bit.

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><p><strong>Chapter 7– Sleepless in New York<strong>

_**June 9th 2000 – 3:00 a.m**_

Danny couldn't sleep at all that night. All he kept thinking about was Jamie and how he was feeling right now, knowing he was going to be snatched away from his family, his friends and the life he's known. Linda came downstairs, snapped on the light and got the shock of her life. Danny was seated at the kitchen table with a bottle of whiskey, bathed in the darkness, his hand toying with the half-empty glass. He winced as the light flooded him.

"Danny? Why are you sitting in the dark?" Linda asked tiredly.

"I like the dark," he answered flatly.

"Danny, it's three in the morning, what are you doing up?" Linda noticed her husband's red eyes and wondered if he'd been crying in the dark.

"I could ask you the same question," he mumbled, his eyes focused on the glass in his hand.

"Well," Linda opened the fridge and dug out some Ben and Jerry's, "The little one is demanding a midnight snack." She placed the tub on the table and searched for a spoon. Danny gazed at the tub.

"Jamie used to love mint chocolate chip ice-cream. Erin, Joe and I always used to take him every Friday after school," he said with nostalgia.

"Yeah," Linda said fondly, "I remember, when we first started going out, if it was a Friday you always insisted we stop off at the store and pick up a small tub of mint chocolate chip for Jamie." Recalling the memories only made Danny's heart heavier. He took a deep breath.

"In exactly ten and a half hours, he's gonna be packed off and sent alone to a mental hospital, away from his family, friends, his room… his life. His only friends are gonna be… those juvenile psychopaths that plead insanity to get out of a life sentence. My baby brother, locked away with those kind of guys. Kid murderers, delusional idiots! You name it I've seen them! And I'm not even gonna be there to protect him from them. Oh, and god forbid they find out he's a Reaga -!" Danny couldn't finish the sentence so instead he finished his drink and slammed the empty glass on the table in frustration.

"It's only in Connecticut," Linda said comfortingly, "You can see him all the time, check up on him. It's not that far."

"Linda, it might as well be on the other side of the world! In timbucktoo!" Danny topped his glass up to the brim, "I mean what kind of a place is it, huh? Who will he be sharing a room with? What's his roommate gonna be like? Huh?"

"Danny -"

"And what about the doctors? What are these quacks gonna do to him? Will they look after him properly? And what's he gonna do when he gets there, he won't know anyone!"

"Danny!" his wife sat opposite him and reached for his hand, "I know you're worried about him. As long as I can remember you've always had a protective attitude towards him. It's one of the many reasons why I love you. But, Jamie witnessed something really traumatic and he has every right to be depressed. He's not a cop yet, he's sixteen years old. The only problems he should be worrying about at his age are girls and acne!"

"I know that, I want those to be his problems too!" Danny huffed, snatching his hand away, "People think I'm behaving like this because I'm in denial about his depression or post-traumatic stress or whatever. Like I'd ever do that!"

"Danny!" Linda tried to calm her husband down, "Jamie watched one of his best friends, your neighbour, get murdered right in front of him! I know that'd give me night terrors. And it'll take me forever to get over!"

"Yeah and I'd totally understand that if he hadn't been so shaken up about this… thing he did that was so bad. How do we know that isn't what's causing his behaviour? All that stress? The burden of keeping such a secret?" Danny contemplated for a moment, "I think I might need to finish this for him."

"You mean, you're going to start your own investigation into this case?"

"Yeah, I just have to, to help him get through this. It's going to finish him, being locked up in there. They think it'll make him better, it'll just make him worse!" Danny said through gritted teeth before he drained his glass and poured himself some more whiskey.

"I guess when I see the way you've been with him over the years, sometimes your concern for him is so overprotective it seems almost fatherly," Linda said with a warm smile.

"It's just the age gap thing. I'm the eldest, he's the youngest. It's hard to explain… it's just something I've got to do! Even a few years back, you know when he was like, twelve, thirteen, pre- adolescence and going through the whole, challenging Dad phase?" Danny proudly jabbed his finger at his chest, still clutching the whiskey glass, "I was the one he came running to. Did you know that? Whenever him and Dad disagreed over something, he came to me! Not Grandpa, not Grandad, not even Joe cause most of the time he would take Dad's side. Me! I saved the day! I always did, even when he was in the playground and some brat was picking on him," Danny smirked, "I handled it so they'd show some respect when they saw him." He laughed at the memories, "No one can ever say I wasn't there for him because I was!" He poured himself a smaller measure. "And I will be."

Linda glanced at the floor before saying tentatively, "You know Danny… sometimes I think maybe you could be doing this more for you than Jamie. To stop yourself from feeling like a failure."

Danny stared at her, and then he narrowed his eyes. "Do you think I'm a failure?"

"What?" Linda asked taken aback, "No, never!"

"Because if you do I'd rather you just say it!" Danny almost snapped but he didn't have much energy left. "I mean, you look at me and you think… how can he be a father if he can't even be a brother?"

"I never doubt your ability to be a father or brother Danny, don't twist things," Linda reprimanded sharply. Danny pouted. "I'm only trying to get inside that – head of yours."

"So you think I'm being selfish? That I'm only doing all this for my own personal gain, to make myself feel better, rather than help my brother!" Danny murmured in a raised voice. "Thanks. Nice to have a supportive wife."

"Hey!" Linda retorted, "Firstly, if you weren't so wasted I'd slap you -"

"I'm not that -!"

"And second of all…" She gently took his hand. "I know how sensitive you really are, especially when it comes to your family and I've always loved and respected that. But this, this thing with Jamie is beyond your control and I think you know that. If he goes to a mental hospital it's because he's sick, but that's not your fault. So stop feeling so guilty."

Danny stared at his wife in a daze, for what seemed like the longest time. Her words echoing through his mind. 'Beyond your control,' 'Stop feeling so guilty.'

"I'm gonna tell you something, that I've never told a soul, not even Jamie." He suddenly said quietly, "But you can't tell anyone."

"I won't." Linda promised.

"I'm serious because – no one can know. They won't understand." He mumbled into his glass.

"You can trust me," Linda said softly. "What happened?"

"When Jamie was about a year old, he was moved into his own room. Ma and Dad were having a huge fight downstairs." Danny frowned trying to retract the memory from his childhood. "I don't know exactly what it was about but I still remember, coming out of the bathroom and hearing Dad shouting at Ma, he kept saying, over and over, 'don't push me Mary! Don't push me!'

Linda's eyes widened but she didn't say anything. She always though Frank had Mary had the perfect marriage. Then again, who did? Danny nodded at her reaction. Then he took a deep breath and plunged into the rest of his story.

"I remember standing, frozen right near the staircase, I couldn't move, I was feeling scared. I was only eleven years old and I'd never heard Dad so angry, he's usually such a cool -" He gulped. "Then Jamie started crying. His room is right near the bathroom so I heard him right away. He kept screaming and screaming but no one could hear him. Ma and Dad couldn't hear him, they were too busy screaming at each other. Erin couldn't hear him or Joe and his room is right next door. I felt worried for him because he kept crying louder and louder, so I tiptoed into his room and saw his small face screwed up, he was really crying. I looked into his crib and he stopped crying as soon as he saw it was me. He started smiling and laughing at me. I put my finger in his tiny hand and he grabbed onto it and held on so tight, I thought he was never gonna let go. And in those few seconds, I felt this, fierce rush of unconditional love hit me. I told him this story about a good cop, bad cop. A story Grandpa used to tell Joe and me when were kids. Jamie didn't understand but he was listening so intently, with that same look he has even now!" Danny laughed, thinking about his treasured memory.

"Then his tiny eyes closed and he went back to sleep and I stayed with him until I was sure he was fast asleep. When I saw the way he had looked at me… wow, I felt so important, needed. All I knew in that moment was that I wanted him to stay like that forever and I would do whatever it takes to keep him safe, and happy." Danny broke out of his reverie and turned to his wife, his eyes swimming with unshed tears. "Do you see now? Do you see why I have to do this?"

"Yeah, I think so." Linda whispered.

"I mean, I won't even come near the word failure if I don't dig deeper into this case! To me –he's still that little kid that's always needed my help and when I saw him lying in that hospital bed – screaming at them when they tried to put him to sleep, I was suddenly reminded of that night. That night in his room. Everyone's saying it's no point, I should just give up. Do you think I should give up?" Danny asked his wife uncertainly.

"No!" Linda said quickly, "Absolutely not! You don't know what new stuff you might uncover!"

"That's what I'm saying!"

"So where are you gonna start with this case?" Linda asked.

Danny let out a long sigh, "Well, I'm gonna pay Dean McGowan a visit tomorrow, hear his side of the story, and see what happens next."

"What do you think he'll tell you?"

"I don't know, but at this point I'm ready for anything. Whatever he has to tell me can't be any worse than my brother being committed…" Danny finished his drink and examined his empty glass. "I'm gonna get him out of this mess Linda!" He vowed. "If it's the last thing I do." Linda smiled and opened the ice-cream. She scooped two spoons, gave one to Danny and raised the other one.

"To Jamie," she said with a soft smile, "may he finally find the peace he deserves." Danny looked at his spoon. He remembered countless times that he'd watch Jamie enjoy this ice-cream. Would he be allowed to eat ice-cream in Corbel?

Danny raised his spoon to Linda's and with a brave face said, "To my kid brother. May he be safe, for however long." They toasted Jamie and went to bed. Before Danny turned the lights out, he knew that he had a new obsession, a new case. And this time it was personal.

Back in hospital, Jamie gradually pulled himself awake from his induced sleep. He rubbed his head and noticed the drips and tubes taped on his arm. The awful reality of his situation hit him hard. He'd be going into a mental hospital. A mental hospital. Just those words alone made his stomach churn. What would they do to him in there? He didn't think beyond his insomnia. He didn't take into account the panic attacks, the hallucinations and depression…Jamie clapped his hand over his mouth. Wave after wave of nausea began to hit him, he leaned over his bed and retched straight into the plastic bowl on the bedside table.

Wiping his mouth, he straightened up and caught a sight of his reflection in the window. He could just about make out how exhausted and beaten he looked. Jamie wondered whether it was time to tell the truth. He desperately wanted to unburden this heavy load but he was terrified of what might happen to him if he did. And it wasn't just his life he was putting at risk by telling his secret. It was his whole family's as well. Not to mention Dean and his family. For a brief second, Jamie contemplated Josh's suggestion. That The Sniper had bigger problems on his mind than to worry about a couple of teenagers. But then he remembered the way his ice blue eyes had glittered menacingly as he pulled off his ski mask, his evil, evil face sneering at him. If his secret was revealed, then he'd definitely be after the ones who shot their mouths off.

Jamie's worrying thoughts was interrupted by the soft creak of his door opening. Jamie held his breath.

No one came into his room.

"Hello?" Jamie called out tentatively.

Silence. No one came in.

"Hello? is – is anyone there?" Jamie asked, desperately, the monitor on his left ringing penetratingly as his heart rate began to fasten involuntarily.

"Jamie!" Dr Carter suddenly poked his head through Jamie's doorway. Jamie jumped in surprise. "Why's your door open?"

"What do you mean?" Jamie asked with a frown. "You just opened it when you came in here."

Dr Carter stepped further into the room, his eyes never leaving Jamie. "No Jamie." He said slowly. "I checked on you about five minutes ago, you were sound asleep. I definitely shut the door behind me. I was checking on the patient opposite you and when I came out, your door was wide open. Who were you talking to?"

"No one!" Jamie said angrily. "I thought it was you."

"It wasn't." Dr Carter shook his head.

Jamie surveyed his doctor, wondering if he was lying to him. Then again why would he?

"Well…did you see anyone when you came out of the room opposite?"

"No. The corridor was completely deserted."

"Then who opened my door?" Jamie asked in trepidation, the awful possibility sinking into the pit of his stomach. Could it be him? No it couldn't be…. he's in hiding right?

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><p>To be continued...<p> 


	8. Chapter 8 Confessions

**Author's Note: **Hey I'm back in the UK! This is the next chapter which I spent ages trying to re-draft so read it and tell me what you think. It contains a lot of brotherly issues and of course the big reveal which so many of you guessed already...

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><p><strong>Chapter 8– Confessions<strong>

Even though the day started off as a beautiful June morning, sunshine, blue sky and light breezes, Danny thought the weather was unfair for such a day. He stopped off at the house to check in with his father before he began at the McGowan's.

"Ma?" Danny called, entering through the front door, rubbing his sore head. He really shouldn't have put all that whiskey away last night. "Ma? Dad?" He called again. "Are you here?" A medium sized box resting on the stairs caught his eye. He sauntered over to it and as soon as he peered inside, all the memories came flooding back to him.

It was a few things from Jamie's room. Danny picked up a photograph of the family, remembering the exact day it was taken. It was a picture of the six of them, the family and it was taken right outside Cinderella's castle on their trip to Disneyworld Florida way back in 1989. He was fifteen; Erin fourteen, Joe twelve and little Jamie was five going on six. His beaming father had his arms around his mother and Erin, Erin's hand was resting on Joe's shoulder, Joe was chuckling at the camera, wearing a Mickey Mouse T-shirt. Danny felt a small smirk tug at his lips as he gazed at his fifteen year old self, standing next to his mother, grinning mischievously as he tickled Jamie who was giggling and wearing his Mickey Mouse ears. A memory caught in time. He gently stroked Jamie's squirming figure with his thumb. What would he give to go back to those days when Jamie was still so young and innocent, and still listened to everything he said? Life seemed so much simpler then. When all their problems revolved around high school instead of getting shot every day on the streets.

Danny continued to rifle through the box. There were a couple of small basketball trophies, a small photo album filled with polaroid's, some rolled up posters, his desk lamp, his Walkman and a few CD's… Danny paused as his hand brushed over something soft. He pulled out the object and almost laughed. It was a chestnut brown teddy bear which was a bit worn but still looked fairly new. Fudge, Jamie had named him.

Danny had won it for Jamie in a Christmas fair, when Jamie was three. Danny remembered the look on Jamie's face when he held the bear for the first time, which seemed big in his tiny hands. Then a few months later, some rotten kids snatched it off him and threw it in a tree. Danny and Erin had gone to pick Jamie up from school, only to find him standing under the tree, howling because his favourite toy was stuck up there. After Danny had sorted the kids out, he climbed the tree and rescued the bear for his brother. Although he was embarrassed to admit it, it was Jamie's guilty pleasure that he still hugged the bear every night and didn't sleep without it.

All of these memories collided through Danny's mind and his smile faded quickly as he remembered why he was sifting through the box in the first place.

"Dad!" He screamed before he could stop himself. The phone started ringing; Frank came running out of the kitchen to answer it, Danny tried to get his attention but his father just waved him aside.

"Hello? Hello?" Frank put the phone down, "They've hung up again, that's the third time today!"

"There was no need to strip his room as if he's going for good!" Danny said distressed, shaking the bear in front of his father, "You might as well strap him into a straightjacket yourself and wave goodbye to his sanity!"

"Now Danny don't start!" Frank warned. "I haven't stripped his room; you can go see for yourself. It's just a few things to make him feel at home."

"So where's Jamie's bike, it's not in the driveway?"

"Joe moved it into the garage this morning."

"Why?" Danny demanded.

"He needed the space for his car I guess," Frank said with a shrug.

"What is this?" Danny said in disbelief, "My brother's in the nuthouse but at least I have extra parking space. Jamie hasn't even left the city yet!"

"It's only temporary Danny!" Frank said, trying to assure his son.

"So Joe's given up on Jamie as well," Danny said, more to himself than to his father.

"We're Reagan's! No one's giving up on Jamie," Frank said sternly.

"Yeah but no one's doing anything about it either! Am I the only one trying to keep him here?" Danny yelled.

"There's no point!" Frank counteracted. "We don't have any evidence to suggest that he's being faced with any trauma other than the shooting!"

Danny sub -consciously held the bear close to him, "Well I'm going to go and talk to Dean later and find out what really happened. Maybe then we'll get some evidence!"

"Will you stop kidding yourself!" Frank said with exhaustion at battling with his eldest.

"I can't just sit back and do nothing! You saw him, he's terrified!" Danny tried not to picture Jamie's scared face.

"You have to let him go." Frank tried to tug the bear out of Danny's grasp but Danny resisted. Frank tugged harder and Danny released the bear reluctantly. "It's for his own good." Frank tucked the bear neatly back in the box and then carried it outside to the car.

Danny hesitated before following his father out. He stared at the empty driveway. He watched Frank pack the box into the boot of his car, then very quickly and angrily, Danny grabbed Jamie's bike from the back of the garage and slammed it down on the edge of the driveway.

"For when he comes back home!" Danny responded, catching the bemused look his father was giving him. Then Danny stormed back into the house, trooped straight to Joe's room and pounded on his door until he opened it.

"Where's the fire?" Joe said in frustration, still fiddling with his tie.

"What do you think you're doing, tossing Jamie's bike into the garage?" Danny raged.

"That driveway is the size of a shoebox!"

"Oh, so you thought you'd just throw his bike away? He hasn't even left New York and already you're destroying his stuff!"

"Hey Danny? Joe? Are you up there?" Erin called to them.

"Coming sis!" Danny answered, still glowering at Joe.

"I didn't destroy his bike I just moved it into the garage!" Joe snapped.

"Yeah? Well I moved it back into the driveway again so tough!" Danny barked. He stormed off to meet Erin in the kitchen.

"Hey," she greeted, pouring herself some coffee, "I'm gonna need this, I was up all night thinking about Jamie. I can't believe he's going into a mental hospital." She took a small sip and sighed, "I guess it just hasn't sunk in yet."

"Yeah," Danny said absently, still trying to calm down over his argument with Joe. "I couldn't sleep either, I just kept thinking about what kind of answers I'm gonna find with this case."

Erin looked up at her brother in surprise and then rolled her eyes. "Not this again! You're not still going through with this?"

"Damn right I'm still going through with this!" Danny growled. "And I know exactly where I'm gonna start!" He jabbed his finger towards the McGowan's. "Dean's car's in the driveway so he hasn't left for school yet." He checked his watch, "I might just be able to catch him."

"So what exactly are you planning on saying to him?" Erin asked with a hint of sarcasm, "Hey Dean, excuse my badge, I just wanted to know if you and my brother saw something you shouldn't have and then lied to the police!"

"Oh give me some credit Erin!" Danny snapped.

"Well that's what this all boils down to in retrospect -"

"You've given up hope as well!" Danny said with a twisted smile, "Fantastic!"

"No I just think we should be helping Jamie through this rather than fill his head with false hopes." Erin said lucidly.

"False hopes? Why don't we just do what we always do eh? Bury our heads in the sand!" Danny threw his hands up in defeat and marched out of the kitchen. "I give up with you guys!"

"Later, Dad!" Joe called from his car, pulling out of the driveway, "I'll meet you at the hospital." Danny scowled at him as he tried to sidle past his car. "And where are you going?"

"If you must know, I'm actually going to do something to help our brother. I'm going to talk to Dean and find out what Jamie's been hiding from us. The sooner we can get him out of Corbel, the better, all though I know it'll be slightly inconvenient for you because you'll have to share the driveway but believe it or not Joe, there are more important things!" Danny fumed.

"Will you stop this!" Joe bellowed after him as he walked off towards the McGowan's. "You're not the only one who cares about Jamie!"

"Could've fooled me!" Danny shouted across to his brother, climbing the steps to the McGowan house.

Danny rang the bell. Then when he got no answer he banged on the door five times. The curtain fluttered.

"Dean open up!" Danny hollered, banging on the door again. Dean opened the door quickly.

"Oh, hey Danny. What - what uh, what are you doing here?" He asked swallowing.

"Hey, I need to talk to you about my brother, mind if I come in?" Danny asked casually. Taken aback by Danny's change of attitude, Dean stepped aside.

"I gotta get to school," Dean said trying to sound normal.

"You look like you haven't slept in weeks," Danny said surveying Dean.

"I'm just busy with -"

"Basketball practice, tests, college stuff," Danny rubbed his temple with his thumb, shooting Dean a mocking smile, "yeah I know, that's exactly what Jamie used to say. Do you know where he is now?" Dean slowly shook his head. "He's at the hospital waiting to be taken to a juvenile mental hospital in Connecticut."

Dean's mouth fell open.

"Yeah I know," Danny said indifferently, "I mean he was awake one minute and then he just fell asleep and didn't wake up."

"Really?" Dean asked trying not to sound to upset.

"Really. They think he's still suffering from post-traumatic stress."

"Could be."

"Yeah but I don't know. I mean you and Josh, Kelli and Zoe were all there, I know you've had trouble sleeping but… I don't see you falling into a coma."

"Tragedy affects people in different ways," Dean said backing away.

"Yeah but," Danny stepped closer. "I just can't shake something that Jamie said to me. He said he did something bad. And he was terrified. What did he do Dean?"

"I don't know!"

"Come on Dean!" Danny said loudly, "I've been doing this job for years I know when someone's lying straight to me! You guys were both there, and both of you seem to be hiding something, so what is it?"

"Look," Dean blurted before he could stop himself, "Okay, okay maybe there is something that we're hiding from you." Danny narrowed his eyes, "But I really think you need to ask Jamie."

"I'm asking you!" Danny raised his voice louder.

Dean let out a long sigh. His cocky, egotistical persona peeled before Danny and he now looked like a kid who carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. It was the same look which haunted his own brother for weeks. Dean leaned against the wall and crossed his arms in defeat.

"Look Dean," Danny started softly, obviously sensing his distress, "just forget I'm a cop for the time being okay? Just remember me as the kid who used to play basketball with you and Jamie every Summer evening. Can you do that?" Danny asked, desperately hoping that his attempts of igniting some nostalgia into the kid's memory will help coax the truth out of him.

Dean avoided Danny's gaze. "The reason why Jamie and I are so stressed is because - of the Sniper."

"Well. Yeah of course."

"The Sniper is still alive Danny."

"What?" Danny said in a voice of pure cynicism. "Alive?"

Dean nodded.

"What are you talking about? He's not alive –who told you that?"

All Dean could do was shrug. "No one. I just know."

"How?"

"I just do!" Dean replied in frustration.

"You gotta give me more than that kid!" Danny said, shaking his head in aggravation. "How do you know he's alive?"

"Look I can't tell you otherwise – things are gonna go down!"

"Things what things?" Danny questioned with a confused frown.

Dean heaved an exasperated sigh.

"Seriously kid if you're gonna lie at least make it sound convincing!"

"I'm not lying!" Dean protested.

"So why didn't you tell anyone about this then huh?" Danny demanded. "I mean you've never had a problem fighting for centre of attention when it suits -"

"We couldn't tell anyone because he threatened us!" Dean shouted. He was bright red in the face and his bloodshot eyes were straining.

Danny faltered. At the inclusion of his brother he calmed down slightly. "Listen kid, the police followed his car to the Brooklyn Bridge! He jumped!"

"Did anyone actually see him take the plunge?" Dean asked in a thin voice.

"Well – well no but -"

"They never found a body did they?" Dean interrupted. "That's because there isn't one."

"That doesn't mean he's alive!"

"But it doesn't mean he's dead either!" Dean glared at Danny.

"Okay," Danny said with an air of scepticism, he leaned against the staircase opposite Dean and mimicked his pose. "So he's still alive and kicking. How exactly did he get away without anyone seeing him? Did he turn invisible?"

"He had help." Dean replied in a small voice.

"By who?"

Dean shut his eyes tight and then opened them. "I'm telling you everything I know Danny. It's up to you what you make of it. And I'm telling you that he had an accomplice."

"No." Danny said after a pause, shaking his head. "No, no way, he can't have done. The reports said he acted alone -"

"The reports are wrong! He was disguised as a hostage. The Sniper sent him out first, then he probably drove the car to the bridge and then disappeared." Dean looked at the ground shamefully.

"I remember he sent out some hostage," Danny said slowly, "but there's no way he could've been an accomplice… he kept telling people that The Sniper was going to blow the place up!"

Dean shrugged, "I don't know Danny, maybe that was all part of the plan."

"Did uh – did The Sniper have any explosives on him?" Danny asked hoarsely.

"Not that I saw. All I remember is… The Sniper was arguing with him about getting this right and as soon as he got the message that the hostage had been sent out – The Sniper bailed."

"How come no one reported this?" Danny asked, trying to absorb all of this newfound information.

"Only… Jamie, Jared and I saw him." Dean started to shake his head as he remembered that day. Danny's heart thumped madly. "We saw The Sniper. He was in the back room of the Nintendo store. The hostage was used as a decoy, allowing The Sniper to slip out of the back and crawl to his freedom."

"Who was the hostage Dean?" Danny asked in a quiet voice.

"One of the workers in the store."

"Who?"

"I don't know who he is."

"How can you not know who he is, I thought you were there?" Danny asked in disbelief.

"Oh, I don't know Danny, it's kind of hard to think straight or pay attention when you've got a loaded gun in your face and a psycho on the other end!" Dean snapped furiously.

"You don't need to tell me." Danny muttered, more to himself than Dean. If Dean heard, he didn't say anything.

"Why didn't Jamie tell us any of this?" Danny whispered. "Why didn't any of you tell us this?"

"He threatened us!" Dean repeated. "He – he said that if he gets so much as a sniff of the police looking for him then he won't be going down alone. He said he'd find us and kill not just us but our families as well. But Jared, he rebelled and said no… then The Sniper just shot him. Jamie blames himself for not standing up to the guy. He kept saying it was his fault that Jared's now…dead."

"So why didn't he just kill all of you then and there?" Danny asked, his voice quivering, "Why – why did he just threaten you I mean – it would've made sense to just – shoot you rather than… do you know what I mean? If he was planning on faking his own death anyway? What did he have to lose?"

"The SWAT team were getting restless and he had to make his escape. It was all about timing. A now or never situation. If it weren't for them who knows, we probably would be dead right now." Dean mumbled.

Danny stood frozen to the spot. He felt numb, he couldn't think straight. He cleared his throat.

"So – so um," he raked his hand through his hair, "my brother, all of you, have had this on your mind all this time?" Dean nodded. "We could've protected you."

Dean snorted, "I don't think so. You can't outsmart The Sniper. Couldn't the first time, what makes you think you can a second time or a third time?" Danny couldn't answer because he knew Dean was right. He had so many more questions he wanted to ask but he could tell Dean was getting agitated and he couldn't force the truth out of him anymore. He would just have to ask Jamie.

"I – I have to go and uh – you should probably get to school. Thanks Dean." Danny left the house.

"Hey Danny," Dean called, Danny turned round to face him. "Tell Jamie that… I hope he gets well soon… and I'll be waiting to kick his ass on the court when he gets back."

Danny laughed. "Sure will. Thanks again for all your help kid."

As soon as Dean shut the door, Danny leaned against the wall of the house and took deep breaths. His mind reeling with this new information. All of a sudden he felt different. Like he was being watched. He knew what he had to do.

At exactly one- thirty, all of Jamie's family except Danny were waiting outside the hospital to see Jamie off. Linda kept checking her watch agitatedly.

"I've left him five messages!" she said, "Where the hell is he?"

"I think we'll be lucky if we even see him at all, the way he was last night," Henry said in a huff.

"All set for the off then?" Seamus said as cheerily as he could, spotting his grandson walking timidly behind his parents.

"Yeah," Jamie nodded, "I'm ready to go." Erin walked up to her brother pulled him into a hug. Then she turned to her daughter.

"Say goodbye to your Uncle Jamie honey."

"Bye Uncle Jamie!" Nikki squealed hugging him.

"Bye, Nik."

"I'm gonna visit you, you know that don't you?" Erin said, her eyes brimming with tears.

"We all are," Joe said, clapping his brother on the shoulder, and then pulling him into a strong embrace.

"Good," Jamie said trying to keep his composure, "I could use the familiar faces." There was an uncomfortable silence.

"Are you okay son?" Frank asked his youngest.

"I'm fine," Jamie nodded, trying to show a brave face, "I mean I've got to be. I'm a Reagan, right."

"Hey," Joe placed a hand on his brother's shoulder, "it's okay to feel upset J. We're Reagan's but we're also human. We are allowed to have feelings you know."

Dr Carter came out of the hospital along with two other men. "Jamie, the car's loaded, ready to go?"

Erin and Mary couldn't stop the tears from spilling; even Joe was starting to tear up. Jamie bade farewell to his family and then scanned the crowd again, noticing a strong presence was missing.

"Where's Danny?" he asked suddenly, with a frown. Erin and Mary exchanged glances.

"Oh, well, he wanted to come but he had a- a case which needed chasing up." Erin explained.

"Oh, okay," Jamie tried to hide his disappointment, "well, can you tell him I said bye?"

Erin nodded, and wiped away a tear. "Sure. Sure, we'll tell him."

"Bye honey, I love you!" Mary said hugging her youngest tightly, "just get well okay."

After Frank hugged his son; he opened the door for Jamie to get in. Jamie looked at his family once more, they tried to smile at him encouragingly, and he returned the smile only weakly. Then he turned his back on them hesitantly and was just about to get in the car when he heard someone scream his name.

"JAMIE!"

Jamie whipped round just as Danny halted to a stop, grabbing onto the wall for support. As he tried to catch his breath, Danny walked towards his brother, "I guess I forgot to give you this," he grinned, holding out his arms.

Jamie dropped his sports bag and hurried over give his brother a quick hug goodbye. Danny grabbed his arm and pulled him away from everyone's earshot.

"Jamie, Dean told me everything," Danny whispered into his brother's ear as he held him in a tight embrace.

"What?" Jamie muttered in surprise. "What did he tell you?"

"He told me the truth. About The Sniper, I know he's alive. Jamie, why the hell didn't you tell me?" He roughly released his little brother and stared at him accusingly, "I wanted to hear it from you not him!"

Jamie just stared at him with a blank expression. He expected to feel relieved that Danny now knew but the way Danny was staring at him... all he felt was his repressed anger easing to the surface. Anger which as the youngest of the bunch he had tried so hard to supress. "So is this the part where you shake your head and tell me how disappointed you are in me?" Jamie said in a bland tone.

"What d'you say?" Danny questioned, taken aback.

"You heard."

"Well I want you to say it again!" Danny demanded in a raised voice.

"Is everything okay over there boys?" Frank called out to them.

"Everything's fine Dad!" Danny called back with a forced grin, "Just saying goodbye the only way we know how!"

"I had to keep it from you!" Jamie protested.

Danny rolled his eyes.

"I did," Jamie whispered softly. "I'm sorry you only found out now but that's the way it had to be!" Feeling his chest growing tighter again, Jamie sat down on the front steps outside the hospital and took a few deep breaths. Danny carefully sat on the stair below him.

"What's happened to you Jamie?" Danny asked his brother quietly, "Me, you and Joe - we used to tell each other everything." Danny nudged Jamie's knee with a small smile, "Reagan boys, remember."

Jamie scoffed, wiping the smile off his brother's face. "I don't know what year you think this is Danny but all that's ancient history." Jamie said scathingly before turning to his brother and glowering at him. "See you're accusing me of keeping secrets but...I don't know if you remember but you went away and never contacted me once!"

Danny recoiled in shock. "That – that was almost two years ago! I thought you understood. IA was all over my ass and Ma was driving me insane. I was going through hell! I had to get away for a few days – we talked all about it when I got back."

"Nah, you talked, I just went along with it." Jamie said indifferently. "I was fourteen and going through my own personal hell. Okay so it might not have measured up to yours in comparison. But still – was it too much effort to even pick up the phone? Or were you so out of it you couldn't even -"

"I wanted to talk to you but I was ashamed." Danny interrupted. He stared at the floor. "I didn't want you thinking bad of me that's all."

"That's all? It's always gotta be about you doesn't it?" Jamie retorted bitterly. "Danny Reagan. You think you're the centre of the universe and only bad stuff happens to you and no one else. Well it does!"

"Why are you starting on me for?" Danny probed angrily.

"I'm just saying… you make out like we've got this perfect brotherly relationship. That we share everything. But it's not true is it?"

"Yeah it is." Danny said quietly.

"Maybe we did when I was younger, I admit to that." Jamie turned his penetrating gaze towards Danny. "But now –it's all surface. I can tell you that a girl's broken my heart or someone's punched me in the face. But this… this goes way beyond our stupid brother to brother heart to heart."

"What?" Danny asked, completely lost. What was Jamie talking about?

"We really have to go Jamie?" Dr Carter's impatient voice called out to them. Jamie glanced at Danny one last time before leaping to his feet. Danny beat him to it. Grabbing onto his arm and forcing back.

"Let go of me Danny," Jamie warned.

"No, not until you tell me why you lied to me for weeks!" Danny raged.

"I didn't lie to you! I was trying to protect you – all of you! Now let me go!" Jamie tried to squirm out of Danny's grip.

"You are my baby brother Jamie!" Danny breathed furiously, still clinging onto his arm, "And that psycho took advantage of your vulnerability. I'm gonna find him and when I do… I'm gonna snap his neck and toss him over the bridge myself." He released Jamie's arm. Jamie stared at Danny for a brief second. Trying to figure out if he was genuine or not. Jamie was struggling to keep his emotions in check. He didn't know which was way up at the moment and that terrified him.

So he did the only thing he could think of. He nodded his thanks. Danny breathed a sigh of relief and nodded back.

"So are we good now?" Danny asked Jamie uncertainly, marching him back to the rest of the group.

"Yeah we're good." Jamie mumbled.

He waved goodbye to everyone once more, then climbed into the back of the car and they were off. Jamie turned round in the backseat and continued to wave at his family as he was taken away. Danny thought he looked like a little kid in there, so small and helpless. As he waved his brother off, Danny had tried so hard to keep his emotions in check, but as they watched the car grow into a tiny dot in the distance, he dropped his arm and turned to his family. It only just sunk in for Danny as he observed his family, his chest tightening at the fact that his little brother was gone and Danny didn't know when he was going to see him again. And when he did see him, God knows what kind of condition he'd be in after being locked up in that place. He felt sick, and couldn't breathe.

"He's really gone," Joe said in a shaken voice.

"Yeah," Danny whispered, clenching his teeth to stop himself from crying. He quickly tried to turn away but all the feelings he was trying to bottle up, wouldn't let him. Danny immediately covered his eyes with his arm so no one could see him crying. They just heard him sniffing heavily and saw his shoulders shaking.

"Danny?" Joe said uncertainly, placing a hand on his brother's shoulder. As soon as Joe touched him, Danny aggressively swiped his brother's hand away.

"Get off me! HE'S GONE!" Danny screamed.

"Yeah!" Erin said coldly, "And where were you? You only just made it to see him off! He needed you here Danny!"

"You shut up! I came didn't I?" Danny countered.

"Barely! And you were about to miss him for what? A case you've got no hope in hell of solving!" Erin bit back.

"Shut up! Shut up!" Danny shouted, pointing his finger at her threateningly, "You have no idea what I've found out so SHUT THE HELL UP!"

"Erin! Danny!" Frank roared, "Stop it both of you!"

"Dad you've got help me!" Danny begged, turning his father, "I've found something out about The Sniper, Jamie's in danger, you have to help me!"

"Okay, okay, okay Danny!" Frank said soothingly to his eldest son, "We'll go home and talk about it there okay?"

* * *

><p>So... what's gonna happen now?<p>

To be continued...


	9. Chapter 9  The 911 Calls

**tara - **Thanks for reviewing! I get your point about Frank, Jamie and the family settling on the mental hospital situation but he is quite depressed - up to the point where I think even he has to admit he needs help. Thanks for reading it though!

Author's Note: I need help! I've already written just one chapter about Jamie in Corbel which is spread out over three days but I need to know if you want it in this story or a separate story. Tell me asap!

And on with the story...

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 9 – The 911 Calls<strong>

"Are you sure that's what he said Danny?" Frank asked his eldest in a dead serious tone, "Because we don't want to be chasing our tails here!"

Joe, Henry, Erin, Danny and Frank sat around the kitchen table discussing Danny's new piece of news.

"I know Dad, I'm positive," Danny said firmly. "You should've heard Dean. He was so scared..."

"God, now I feel like a class A bitch," Erin sighed, her head resting on her fingertips, "After the way I talked to you." She looked at Danny. "I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault sis," Danny said inaudibly, "believe me, this is not your fault."

"I – I just can't believe Jamie kept this from us?" Joe said in astonishment, "Why would he do that?"

"It's because of us, mainly me," Danny said in a voice of pure regret, "Us and our, passion for the job. I should've made it more obvious to him that it didn't matter what he saw or knew! We're his family first and cops second!"

"Don't blame yourself Danny," Joe said straight to Danny, "we are going to find this guy and get Jamie home." Danny thanked his brother with a frail smile.

"How do we track down a ghost?" Erin asked practically.

"We have to find a way to find a way of tracking down The Sniper without alerting the media." Henry said straightforward, "In order to do that we need to start going over everything from the beginning and I mean literally everything. Every detail counts."

"Do we even know where to start?" Joe asked with a frown, his arm casually resting on the box which he had 'borrowed' from the Cold Case department.

"In order for us to find this guy, we need to know more about him." Henry stated to the table.

He received blank stares in return. Henry sighed in exasperation. "I mean, we need to know just what kind of a killer he is. I'm thinking we should read the autopsy reports for the seventeen people he murdered. They could provide crucial evidence. We need to know what type of damage he did to those victims on that day."

In an instant Joe reached into the box and handed a stack of papers to Danny. "Here, read that."

"This is one sick bastard," Danny muttered as he scanned the autopsy reports. "God… one bullet through the head and another in his lower abdomen… and he was only thirty-six."

"It doesn't matter how old you are, you're still an innocent." Frank murmured absently.

"Hold on a second." Danny spread out the sheets on the table, "All these reports show a consistent pattern. Analysis of the bullets indicated that they came from a long range rifle."

"Well we knew that!" Erin said with a sigh. Danny flicked his eyes towards her.

"Possibly a Bush Master."

"Oh."

"And let me tell you right now," Danny announced in disdain, "military rifles are used for killing. They're not built to hurt or maim someone, but to actually kill them."

There was a very uncomfortable silence.

"It goes in small and then it gets wider as it goes through," Danny continued, demonstrating with his hands. "So what you end up with is all those organs which are in that range, that cone, get injured whether they get hit directly by the bullet or not."

"Right, so he obviously has a military background. That narrows it down well!" Joe muttered with scorn.

"I hope to God Jared's parents didn't read these reports," Frank said in a grave voice, wiping his brow with a handkerchief.

"Wait till I get my paws on him…" Danny growled, tossing each report back into the box. "Evil traitor!"

"Yeah but it wasn't just one person involved though was it?" Erin said with disgust. "He had help from the inside."

"What about this accomplice D?" Joe asked Danny, rifling through the files, "You said he was the hostage they sent out."

"That's what Dean said, yeah he was used as a decoy, while The Sniper slipped out. Unseen." Danny said directly to his grandfather.

"How many times," Henry said apologetically to his family, "do we have to go through this. I haven't been the Commissioner in years! I have no control over these guys any more than their parents!"

"What about the blue prints for the mall?" Frank asked Joe putting on his glasses, "Are they in there?"

"Er yeah, I think so, I came across it earlier, hold on, I think it's this thing," Joe extracted a tightly folded piece of paper from the leaves of the box. Frank and Erin cleared some space on the table and they unfolded the large map.

"We know Jared was shot in the Nintendo store, which is where Jamie and the others were. So that's…here!" Danny circled the spot with his finger. "Which means the getaway place must be either in or behind the store room."

"Yeah, look!" Joe rubbed a tiny space right next to the store room. "This room right here is separate from the store yet it's on the map!"

"Is that… what is that?" Danny leaned in for a closer look, "Is that a tunnel?"

"It doesn't look like an underground tunnel," Frank said peering closely, "that looks like an over ground tunnel."

"Air conditioning vent." Joe said nodding.

"I'm guessing it leads outside?" Erin asked also leaning in.

"To the roof." Joe said, tracing the line with his finger.

"If it's on the map that means it's part of the building. " Frank popped open a bottle of wine and poured it. "The Sniper must've either known about it, maybe he was a worker there or most likely he acquired the blueprints before the massacre."

"Yeah no surprises from who," Erin mumbled with huff.

"Okay so this son-of-a-bitch threatened Jamie and Dean, shot Jared, must've had some kind of communication going with the decoy, threatened to blow the place up – sent the guy out, then hoisted himself up into the air conditioning vent and crawled onto the roof. And I'm just guessing that everyone thought he was a bird or something!" Danny said sarcastically.

"He must've shimmied down the drainpipe at the back of the mall." Frank said feeling disappointed that he hadn't spotted this sooner. "He's good. I'll give him that." He drained the wine glass.

"This doesn't make any sense! I thought the SWAT team had the mall completely surrounded?" Erin said in exasperation. Danny and Henry exchanged an awkward glance. "There were helicopters and everything! How the hell could he just disappear without being seen?"

"I don't know Erin," Frank said in a tired voice. "But we can add that to the list of questions we'll ask the decoy."

"Speaking of which, any luck on our partner in crime?" Henry asked Joe.

Joe consulted the notes, "Okay, it says here the hostage's name was Freddie McCredie…" Danny's head snapped up in recognition. "What you know him?"

"McCredie? McCredie? Yeah he definitely used to work in the Nintendo store! Just like Dean said!" Danny said clicking his fingers. "I remember him when I was in there about, uh, nine months ago, buying Jamie's birthday present!"

"Are you sure?" Erin asked with some doubt. "There are loads of guys who work in that store, how do you know it was exactly him?"

"I'm positive!" Danny snapped impatiently, "I remember it, he told me his name and I spent a good twenty minutes with the guy debating about the graphics on the new version of Zombietown! Trust me, I remember a name when I see one!"

"And that kind of evidence is gonna buy you zippo in court, unless you can put that name to a face!" Erin said sharply.

"Do we have a picture of him Joe?" Henry asked his grandson quickly, before another argument could erupt.

"We most certainly do," Joe said with a raised eyebrow, "is this our guy Danny?" Joe held up a small picture clipped to the profile.

"Yeah that's definitely him!" Danny said with confidence after scrutinizing the picture.

"So, on trial you'll definitely be able sanction that the man before you in court is Freddie McCredie?" Erin confirmed.

"If I haven't killed him first," Danny muttered darkly. "I'm kidding," he added hastily as Erin flared him one of her looks.

"Freddie McCredie, thirty-two, assistant manager in the Nintendo store…" Joe read and continued to flip through the pages.

"Surely they have his security clearance and emergency contact information, an address?" Erin said to the table.

"Yep, there's an address! His younger brother Brian McCredie is listed as his only emergency contact," Joe scribbled down the address on a scrap piece of paper and handed it to Danny.

"Lower Manhattan. This is our first stop tomorrow!" Danny said, pocketing the paper.

"Are you really expecting this Brian McCredie to hand his brother over without wanting some kind of explanation?" Erin asked sceptically.

"No," Danny said with some irritation, "but I'm willing to bet he doesn't know about his brother's double life."

"You don't know that!" Erin countered.

"Think about it Erin," Joe said packing up the files, "it's not something you want to brag about, especially to your family."

"He could've been frightened into keeping his mouth shut in the same way Jamie and the others were!" Erin said stubbornly.

"Right, like he called him up from the roof of the mall and threatened to shoot him in his sleep! Come on!" Danny said dismissively.

"I think," Frank interrupted before Erin could talk, "that we should all go to sleep and think about our next move. It's been a long day and… God knows what your mother's going to make of this. But we keep this within the family."

"How are we supposed to search for New York's most wanted guy without alerting the media?" Erin asked her father.

"Well technically he's not really New York's most wanted guy as New York thinks he's dead," Joe said slowly.

"We'll start with his number two and work our way on from there." Henry explained.

"Okay but we have to do this fast." Erin said pouring herself a large glass of red wine. "There's a mass murderer on the loose and we don't know where he is or what he's doing."

"We have to keep Jamie out of this." Danny said decisively to the group, "You know that don't you? He can't be involved. You know what that psycho said he'd do to him, we can't let that happen. Maybe we can't protect him inside but we can from the outside."

"Come on Danny," Henry said passively, "I don't think The Sniper will travel all the way to Connecticut to break into a juvenile mental hospital! Especially when he's supposed to be keeping a low profile. Those places has just as much security as a prison! Jamie's safer in there than he is in here."

"It doesn't matter! Do you wanna risk it cause I sure as hell don't!" Danny said, slightly hostile.

"Yeah this Sniper doesn't seem like the kind of guy who'd make empty threats grandpa," Joe pointed out, "I wouldn't put it past him. We really don't wanna piss him off."

"And it's not just Jamie's life at stake here," Frank reminded everyone, "We're also talking about Dean and maybe even Zoe, Josh and Kelli as well."

Joe shifted uncomfortably in his seat for a few seconds. "Um, I found this in the box as well." Joe said uncertainly, his eyes on his father. He slowly reached into the box and withdrew a tightly wrapped, brown package and slid it across the table with a shaking hand. "I didn't want to listen to it."

"Is that what I think it is?" Erin whispered.

Joe nodded. "The 911 calls."

Danny immediately unwrapped the package. He unfolded the paper carefully, revealing a thin tape recorder lying in the middle. All the Reagan's exchanged fearful, uncomfortable glances.

Frank was first to break the heavy silence. "Who wants to play it?"

"I will." Henry stated after a moment's pause. "I ain't getting any younger!" He was about to hit the play button when Erin quickly stopped him.

"Grandpa wait! Look, are you sure we should listen to those recordings?" She asked with indecision.

"Of course we should Erin," Frank said with reassurance. "We could find clues."

Erin nodded slowly. "Okay. Play it grandpa."

Henry nodded and hit the play button. In an instant, a strong static sound sizzled through the air followed quickly by a cool female voice.

_"911 what's your emergency?"_

_"Hello I need help! I really need help!"_

_"Okay mam I need you to calm down and tell me what's wrong?"_

_"It's – it's the man in the line next to me – he's fallen down and– I think – oh God I think he's been shot!"_

The terrified shrieking of the woman on the other end of the line drew tense gasps from all the Reagan's.

_"Okay Mam are you sure he's been shot?"_

_"Yeah – yeah we were waiting in line and then – out of nowhere I heard a gunshot and the next thing I know he's on the floor next to me – I can't see the shooter anywhere – the man is on the floor now and he's bleeding – oh God you gotta get an ambulance here right now!"_

_"Mam stay on the line…"_

Danny quickly changed the track.

_"Is this 911?"_

_"This is 911, what's wrong?"_

_"It's my girlfriend – she's been shot randomly but I don't know who from?"_

_"Okay sir, is she badly hurt?"_

_"N –well she got shot in the arm. She can still talk but she's bleeding bad. Real bad. You need to get some help over here now, please. She's in a lot of pain."_

A thick sound of heavy bullets belted over the man's voice. He was mumbling frantically but no one could make out what he's saying.

Danny quickly changed the track.

_"911 what's your emergency?"_

_"It's my daughter Emma, I think she's been shot in the leg! We need help!"_

_"Sir, I need you to stay calm and tell me where you are?"_

_"We were in line at Five Guys – and then I heard a gunshot and a scream. Next thing I know, Emma's fallen into my arms and she's crying and she's got blood streaming out of her leg, and she keeps on yelling like – 'Daddy, help me!' But I can't stop it! Then we crawled under some tables but – you gotta send help now! Please!"_

Everyone could hear the commotion in the background, the screaming and the sound of gunshots. Danny changed the track.

_"911 what's your emer -"_

_"HELP MEEE! HELP MEE!"_

The shrill screams of the woman piercing through the room made the hairs on the back of the Reagan's necks stand up.

_"Mam what's wrong?"_

_"It's my son! It's my son! He's been shot in the chest and he's not breathing! We're at the Kings Plaza Mall, help us please – help – help!"_

_"Okay mam calm down the paramedics and police are on their way over there already, I need you to tell me what happened?"_

_"I don't know what happened – I do not know what happened, I – one minute we were just shopping, next thing I know I heard this firecracker sound – I thought oh it must be kids and then I saw my baby on the floor…"_

Frank pressed his palm to his forehead and kept his eyes shut tightly. Danny, his face drained of all colour, changed the track as fast as he could.

_"Hello 911 what's your emergency?"_

_"I need an ambulance right away – my brother's friend's been shot!"_

Danny and Joe glanced at each other but didn't say anything.

"Where are you?"

"I'm in the Converse store - we've got about eight other people in here and there's a guy who just started shooting out of nowhere at us! My brother – oh God, my brother went out to the food court and he hasn't come back yet – please, please can you get us some help! I don't think he can hold on for much longer- he's only ten!"

Danny drew in a sharp intake of breath.

_"You don't need to worry sir we've got paramedics, fire and police enroute okay?"_

_"Okay – hurry please – my little brother's still out there and I don't know where he is or if he's okay – he just went to get some ice-cream -can you find out for me please, please!"_ The poor kid begged.

_"Okay, sir calm down, we can find out for you, what's your brother's name?"_

_"Liam Farrell."_

"Liam Farrell?" Frank looked at Joe, "Wasn't he the first…?"

Joe nodded sadly. Erin felt a small tear escape down her cheek. Danny shuddered and changed the track.

_"Hello? Hello is this 911?"_

A voice they all recognized drew their attention back to the recorder.

_"This is 911 what's your emergency?"_

_"Um, my name's Zoe D'Luca, I'm at the Kings Plaza Mall and I'm sitting in Walden Books with about thirty other people, we're all barricaded inside – hiding behind bookshelves- and - and there's a man out there with a gun and – he's been shooting at people from outside- "_ Danny could tell from her voice that Zoe was trying stay calm but she was talking a mile a minute.

_"Have you been shot Zoe?"_

_"I've been shot in the hand – the bullet just grazed my hand but -"_

_"I've got another Kings Plaza Mall!"_ The operator shouted, _"Okay has anyone else been injured Zoe?"_

_"Yes!"_ Zoe said angrily. _"Everyone is in a panic. Um, um, I've got a few injured kids here as well."_

Danny and Frank exchanged an upsetting glance.

_"We need the police here!"_

_"Okay we're getting them there."_

_"Can you please hurry? My friend's here and she's not feeling well, I think she might faint."_

_"That must be Kelli,"_ Erin sniffed.

_"Who is the shooter mam?"_

_"I do not know who the shooter is! I do not know who the shooter is – oh my God!"_

A tirade of loud popping noises suddenly echoed through the line, Zoe and Erin screamed in shock.

_"Zoe! Zoe, I need you to stay on the line with me because we need to know what's going on!"_ The operator said sharply, _"Okay?"_

_"Okay."_

_"Can you tell me what happened?"_

They heard Zoe take a shuddering breath.

_"We – we came here in a group, and we left all the guys in the Nintendo store and we went walking around the mall for some time – maybe about uh- uh – fifteen, twenty minutes and then I heard the sound of – it sounded like firecrackers so we went out to check and I saw a guy dressed all in black and he aimed the gun at us and fired – we ducked down and he got my hand but the guy behind us – um – I think he got hit."_

_"What about your friend is she okay?"_

_"Yeah, she's fine, she didn't get hit – she's quite shaken up though, she might pass out any second now!"_

_"Where are you both now?"_

_"We are behind a bookshelf – I'm behind a bookshelf at the front of the store and I've got- I've got people hiding behind bookshelves and under the counter."_

_"You said you're at the front of the store, is there any way you can see what's going on?"_

_"I think it's too dangerous to go – to look – I don't wanna – I can't go look."_

_"Where is the shooter now?"_

_"He's right outside the store."_

_"He's outside!"_

_"He is right outside the store! I hear – I think he – I think he's shooting into the store next to us!"_

_"The store next -"_

_"Oh my God he's really – he is really going at them next door – he is really -!"_

They could hear the chilling repetitive sound of the gunshots being fired off in the background and the faint sound of windows shattering.

_"Zoe – Zoe, listen, to, me - I need you to calm down and tell me which store that is?"_

The kitchen was filled with a very anxious pause. They knew which store it was. They'd checked the blueprints.

_"Oh my God - It's the Nintendo store! My friends!"_

Erin dug her fingernails into her cheeks. Joe covered his mouth as if he was going to be sick.

_"Are you sure?"_

_"Yes! Please help them, they're all in there!"_

Danny changed the track, his hand hovered over the button as the next voice crackled to life.

_"911?"_

_"This is 911."_

_"There is someone out there trying to kill us!"_

_"Okay sir I need you to tell me your exact location."_

_"I'm – I am currently hiding in the Nintendo store at the Kings Plaza Mall!"_

Danny's stomach plummeted. Henry shook his head and poured himself some whiskey.

_"Yes?"_

_"I've got about ten, maybe twelve kids ranging from the age of about thirteen to twenty all in here! And there's a guy out there with a gun who's shooting at us."_

_"He's shooting at you?"_

_"He is trying to shoot -right at us yes!"_

They could hear the panic stricken buzz of the kids in the store.

_"Right sir I need you -"_

A thick sound of gunshots belted down the other end.

_"Kids just stay down! Just stay down, get behind the counter! All of you! Go! Now!"_

_"Okay sir I need you to tell me what's going on out there."_

_"This – this guy – he just keeps shooting and shooting at us – we've got kids screaming- shots firing in our direction – glass flying, everywhere – I think I have some glass in my cheek."_

_"Okay sir the ambulance and police are on their way but I need you to stay on the line!"_

_"He's started shooting at the door; everyone's panicking because we think he might come in!"_

_"I need you to keep all the kids in the store calm sir."_

_"Fine."_

_"Is there any way you can block the door?"_

_"I think – maybe but he's right outside, he's standing right outside I can see him, I don't wanna go, we need to get these kids out of here –I need to get out of here right now!"_

_"I've just been told – sir – we've got the SWAT team there – they've got the place completely surrounded."_

_"I can't stay here I'm gonna have to run!"_

_"No, no sir don't do that!"_

_"I have a wife and four kids I can't die – I can't take it – I have to go now_!"

There was some hasty movement on the other end.

_"No sir don't do that!"_

"No, no, no!" Danny yelled, oblivious to that fact that he was talking to a tape recorder. No one bothered to point this out to him. They were all gawping at the recorder in shock.

_"Sir? Sir? SIR!"_

A stream of gunshots reverberated through the tiny speaker of the recorder. A tremor of screams and wails could be heard. They all knew Jamie, Dean and Jared were amongst the crowd.

Danny switched the recording off. He couldn't listen to anymore. Already he was starting to feel sick.

"Stupid, stupid idiot!" Danny hissed.

"I've got the surveillance tapes from the mall as well," Joe said hesitantly.

"Oh, I'm scared to see that!" Erin breathed.

"Maybe we should wait a while before we watch those," Frank said in a steady voice. "I think we've all – experienced enough for one night."

"It's not fair!" Joe spat, wrapping up the tape recorder gingerly and dropping it back into the box. "That scumbag gets his freedom while all those poor people were suffering!"

"He won't get his freedom for much longer," Frank told his children reassuringly, "I promise you, we are going to do whatever it takes to get our boy back home and this son-of –a-bitch behind bars on death row!"

"The Reagan's are all over his ass," Danny said with a smirk, "and we're not gonna rest until he's burning in hell!"

The Reagan's all toasted their new case, completely oblivious to the mysterious figure, cloaked in darkness, watching them all through the window.

* * *

><p>To be coninued...<p>

(p.s. don't forget to tell me what you think of the whole Jamie thing, cause if you want to it'll be the next chapter otheriwse it'll be a different story entirely!)


	10. Chapter 10 Reagan, Interrupted

**Author's Note: **Hey thanks again for those of you that reviewed and sent me feedback on which chapter you wanted. I had to weigh out the options and in the end I just scrapped the chapter I wrote and re-wrote this one to fit in with the story so read it and tell me what you think! Also there are more secrets to be discovered so sta tuned!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 10 – Reagan, Interrupted<strong>

_**June 18th 2000**_

"Are you ready yet?" Frank called out to Danny as the family prepared themselves to leave.

"I've already told you I'm not coming," Danny stated firmly, trooping down the stairs.

"Oh yes you damn well are," Frank said in a stern voice, his eyes flashing dangerously. "Jamie's expecting visitors from all of us today, so get in the car!"

"But Dad we have work to do!" Danny whined. "You do realize it's been nearly two weeks and we haven't found the McCredie's. We're nowhere near finding them now than we were two weeks ago!"

"Danny, I told you that we need to work on this in your own time. You need to carry on your usual cases and go about your day as normal. We can't afford to make waves, if the press ever gets wind of this -"

"All right! All right Dad I get it!" Danny sniffed. "But that doesn't mean I like it!"

"Just get in the car!" Mary barked from outside.

If the weather were to echo anything that morning it would've been the Reagan's mood. The grey skies and light drizzle were very fitting for the way they all felt as they raced to Connecticut. Erin was sandwiched between both her brothers while her father drove, stone face and silent.

This was the first time Danny had visited Corbel, he didn't know what to expect and he didn't know what Jamie would be like.

Frank silently pulled up next to the wrought iron gates which was keeping Jamie prisoner. They opened automatically, allowing them to drive slowly up the path shadowed by the trees. The Reagan siblings squashed together to peer out of Joe's window to get in a good view of Corbel. A great, ancient red-bricked building stood majestically atop a hill of sheer greenery. Danny shuddered involuntarily. It reminded him of his childhood and the scary stories they would always tell each other. And then when Jamie was old enough they would tell the same stories to him, all of them crammed into their tree house during Halloween or around the fire at camping trips.

But they were just stories. Danny would always kick it up a notch just to see how resilient Jamie could be. Jamie would always pretend that he could handle it and was afraid to look weak in his older brother's eyes. Danny could kick himself now. Even though they were just stories he still felt the same in the real world, still felt like he couldn't be weak in front of his big brother. Danny just couldn't believe this was the reality.

As they walked up the stone steps, Erin placed an assuring arm around her mother.

"How did we end up here? All I ever wanted is to keep you kids safe," Mary murmured.

"I know Ma," Erin said half-hugging her mother, "you're the best mother anyone could ask for. None of this is your fault."

They signed themselves in at reception and then proceeded to follow a nurse to Jamie's room.

"You know Ma's really upset," Joe said pointedly to Danny who was just fidgeting with his tie.

"What do you want me to do about it?" Danny snapped. A second later he regretted it. "Sorry." He muttered automatically.

"It's okay bro." Joe said with a small smile, he clapped his hand on Danny's shoulder, "We'll do this together."

"I just don't know if I can handle seeing what state Jamie's in," Danny confessed miserably. "It's like my worst fears and nightmares have suddenly collided into one and -I just don't know what to think. And what if he asks us about the case? What are we supposed to tell him? That we've found Jack shit?"

"Nothing!" Joe hissed. "We tell him nothing about the progress of the case or – lack of."

"But what if he knows, Jamie always knows when there's something wrong..."

"We just have to keep it from him, that's all!"

They entered in single file through a narrow, clean, ice white hallway. Various noises could be heard in the background which made Danny feel very uncomfortable just walking down the hallway. The whole place screamed of sinisterness. Danny shook off the ominous feeling he had trickling down the back of his neck and tried to toughen himself up, ignoring the disturbing faces of the other patients which were pressed up against the glass of their room windows.

"They all look like children," Mary whispered to Frank.

"That's because they are children Ma!" Danny retorted impatiently. Even though they were just kids it was still hard for him to be there. He was used to dealing with unstable people all the time, of course he was, but this, this was something totally new simply because his little brother was involved.

"I hate this place!" He said in a raised voice, his voice reverberating off the walls of the elongated corridor.

Erin smacked his arm. "At least you can walk out of here!" She glared at him. "Jamie's locked up here twenty-four hours a day!"

"I tell you, McCredie's got a lot to answer for," Danny growled.

"I know but what are we gonna do about it?" Erin whispered fiercely.

"You wait till I get my hands on him!"

"We need to find him first." Joe mumbled.

"Kids, that's enough!" Frank commanded.

"But Dad, take one look at this pla -"

"I said enough Danny!"

"Here we are, Jamieson Reagan, Room Fourteen, Nightingale Ward Block B." The nurse pocketed his card and proceeded to unlock the heavy bolts on the door.

"Are all of those locks really necessary?" Danny asked, annoyed.

"It's just for their own safety Detective."

"Their own safety?" Danny frowned. Erin rolled her eyes at him, wishing he would just shut up. He understood her hint but chose to ignore it. "I don't understand."

"It's so they don't wonder off and other patients can't wonder in." The nurse unhooked the last bolt and opened Jamie's door.

Jamie sat crossed legged on his bed, scribbling incessantly in his journal. He glanced upwards at the sound of the door being unlocked and his mouth fell open when he saw his family shuffling in awkwardly.

"Hello Jamie." The nurse said in a patronizingly cheery voice, "How are we doing today?"

"Uh –fine."

"What's that you've got there."

"Journal." Jamie replied in a dead voice. Danny couldn't ignore the nagging instinct in his gut which was telling him that he shouldn't ignore the look in Jamie's eyes. They looked so numb and distant, almost like he'd just given up. There was no sign of that bright sparkle and twinkle of cheekiness which he'd seen for the past sixteen and a half years.

"Good for you," The nurse said brightly, deliberately choosing to ignore Jamie's tone. "Well, enjoy your family's visit. You have twenty minutes, if you need me, I'll be right outside the door." He bustled out of the room and firmly slammed the door shut.

Now it was just Jamie left to stare at his family who hovered right near the door, trying to break the ice. He shifted uncomfortably underneath his favourite Abercrombie sweatshirt which was suddenly making him feel very hot, despite it being constantly freezing in his room. He practically lived in that sweatshirt.

"You're looking healthier since the last time we saw you Jamie," Frank praised.

Erin smiled and sauntered around the room. "This is your room huh? It's… nice."

Jamie shrugged. "It's okay I guess."

"You've made it like your room back at home." Joe commented, looking at all the posters which he'd stuck up beside his bed in exactly the same order as his room back in New York.

"As much as I could." Jamie responded in a heavy voice. "Of course it'll never be exactly the same, but it's still mine, you know?"

"Yeah," Erin answered quickly with a nod, "of – of course."

"So you're still keeping a journal of your time here? That's good." Frank said with a supportive smile.

"Yeah, and a video diary too. You know, with the video camera you guys gave me for Christmas. I think it's important to record as much as I can of my time here."

On the other side of the room was another bed currently unoccupied yet there were posters and other objects which suggested that side of the room belonged to somebody.

"Who's the roommate?" Danny asked, cocking his head towards the other side.

"His name's Craig Dennison. He's seventeen, from New Jersey and… he killed his Dad."

The Reagan's recoiled in shock, not so much that Jamie was sharing a room with a killer but because of the casual tone in which he said it in.

"In a car accident," Jamie said emphatically, catching the looks on his family's faces. "It was a complete accident. He suffered a breakdown and now he's trying to recover from guilt. He was the one driving the car."

"Oh well, at least he's not a cold blooded murderer that's something!" Mary smiled in relief.

Jamie closed his eyes in humiliation, "Oh Jesus," he murmured. Danny's eyes narrowed in concern.

"What's he like?" Joe asked, pretending like he hadn't heard his brother's blasphemy.

"He's a cool guy. We get on well. He calls me Chip because he thinks I look like a chipmunk! It's quite funny for someone with BPD."

Mary's smile slipped but she quickly recovered. "Your grandparents all send their love. Don't they?" She added, glaring at her family.

"Yeah, yeah they do!" Joe said with a forced smile, trying to figure out how his brother was feeling by the lack of emotion in his eyes.

"Great." Jamie whispered.

"Are they treating you all right?" Danny asked forcefully, determined to find what was causing his brother's withdrawal.

"Yeah I'm fine," Jamie said in the same hollow voice.

"Are the people here – what are they like?" Erin asked nervously.

"Doctors or patients?"

"Well, have you met any… interesting people here?" Frank asked his son, trying not to offend him.

"Yeah Dad I have." Jamie said in a voice that was completely deadpan. "I've made some friends. They seem decent enough. One's a cutter, she's also got HIV, another one's got psychosis and I've even met a guy who's got bipolar -"

"You don't belong in here!" Danny interrupted, his voice tinged with pain at what he had to hear.

"I'm doing everything they say," Jamie said in reassurance, slowly turning his eyes towards Danny. He picked up Fudge which was tucked in the folds of his blanket and absently started picking at his fur. Danny's lips twitched. When Jamie was a kid, he used to always fidget with Fudge when there was something wrong. Danny wanted to shake him. What was wrong with him, why was he behaving so weird?

"What's going on kid?" Danny asked in a soft voice. He sat down on the edge of Jamie's bed. "Please talk to me. We're on your side here. And we're trying to help you but you won't tell us how."

Jamie resisted the strong urge to roll his eyes, instead he just averted his brother's strong gaze. "This is such a crock of shit! That's all I get in here, everyone thinking they can help me." He flicked his eyes towards his brother, "But I don't need help. Nothing can ever stop me from what's going on inside here!" Jamie jabbed at his head. "Because I know he's still out there!"

Joe turned away, choking on suppressed emotion and guilt. Guilt he knew Danny was feeling as well. Jamie sighed and lowered his hand. "So I do whatever they tell me," he continued in a hushed voice. "I swallow every anti-depressant and sleeping medication they wanna give me."

"Sleeping medication? But I thought you hate sleeping?" Danny said defiantly.

Jamie rolled up his sleeves of his sweatshirt to reveal the tender, red welts around his wrists. "You wanna tell em that again?"

Mary and Erin gasped in horror, Joe couldn't look. Danny subtly clapped his hand to his mouth at the sight of Jamie's sore wrists. Jamie's eyes indicated to the thick leather straps on the side of his bed. "Those buckles give you hell when you try and break free from them."

Frank just sighed heavily, "Jamie why did you try and fight them."

"Because from the moment you enter the place, all your power is signed over to them. You have to be strip searched while they write down every… scar, birthmark, tattoo, or whatever. You're left with a T-shirt and tracksuit so they can 'ensure your safety.' Do you know how humiliating that is?"

"Yeah I can imagine," Joe said in a soft tone.

"I mean, I get it, just in case we have any suicidal thoughts but it gets worse."

Danny didn't know if he should feel worried that Jamie had used 'we.'

"The doctors and nurses know I don't want to be here so they always threaten me with restraints."

"Oh God, that's awful," Mary breathed, hating the thought of her youngest child having to go through that.

"Jamie, what's going on?" Joe asked worriedly, "I thought you said they were treating you okay?"

"Yeah well I would say that wouldn't I?" Jamie said scornfully. "That's what this whole visit is all about isn't it? You just swing by to check in on me, to make sure I'm not hanging from the showerhead -"

"Jamie!" Danny interrupted, his eyes closed in frustration. "Just stop it okay?"

Frank stepped forward a step. "Danny it's okay, he's angry at us, just let him get it off his chest."

"I'm not an idiot!" Jamie spat, "You don't even know where he is do you?"

From Jamie's tone they could tell that he knew they were onto nothing. Joe's eyes widened and he looked at Danny, then his father for support. His father just cautioned him to stay quiet and let Danny sort this one out with Jamie. He was after all, the one that started it.

Danny straightened his spine, his hand resting inward on his knee, as he scrutinized Jamie. "Who told you that?"

Answering a question with a question. Jamie let out a small laugh before saying shrewdly, "You haven't." They might as well just give it up and stop lying to him.

"Jamie don't worry about that now," Erin said lightly.

"Who said?" Danny pressed.

"Just tell the truth Danny."

Danny raised his eyebrow in surprise. Jamie, seeing the look in his brother's eyes and sensing exactly which lecture he was in for, looked away and bit down on his lip.

"Oh, so –so you're gonna lecture me about telling the truth now huh kid?" Danny challenged in an even tone.

Jamie took a sharp breath.

"Danny come on," Joe intervened, watching his little brother. "Just give him a break."

"I already did!" Danny said loudly.

Jamie released, slowly.

"Maybe we should make a move," Mary suggested, her motherly instincts able to sense trouble about to brew, "Danny you can talk to your brother later."

"No it's okay Ma," Jamie said in a thin voice, "we might as well talk about the elephant in the room."

"Yeah we should," Danny agreed, "I wanna know why you didn't think you could trust us."

Jamie didn't even know where to start. He ran his hands over his face for comfort.

"Well?" Danny prompted.

"I'm sorry." It was all Jamie could muster.

"I knew something wasn't right, I kept on asking you didn't I?"

"Letting us go all that time thinking you were okay, why?" Mary asked in sorrow.

"You could've come to me, you know you could." Erin said in a gentle voice, not wanting to guilt her little brother any further.

Jamie just shook his head, staring blankly at the floor, his thoughts drowning one by one in his mind.

"But Jamie… I had to hear it from Dean!" Danny said in revulsion, "I had to hear how much you've been suffering from someone else. Day after day, week after week, we had to watch you put on a brave face in front of us when deep down you were being torn apart and you couldn't talk to us about it!"

Jamie pressed his hand to his forehead in agitation. "It doesn't matter now does it?"

"It matters to me kid." Danny said quietly. He placed his hand over his heart. "Do you have any idea how painful it is to know you were suffering like that? That some murdering scum has this hold over my baby brother – it's infuriating."

Don't cry! Jamie vowed, don't give in to weakness! He felt a lump of emotion rise in his throat. What had he done to his family?

"Can you at least tell us why you kept it from us Jamie?" Frank asked.

"I don't know Dad," Jamie answered wearily, "I just did."

"You just di – that's sort of thing I'd say!" Danny incredulously gasped.

"Yeah well you're not in my shoes are you?" Jamie said harshly, "There's nothing more to say."

But Danny wasn't giving up, "If this were two years ago, you'd have told us right away, I know you would've!"

Jamie didn't have a comeback except, "Yeah I would've."

"Right, so what's changed?"

"I have! I've done a lot of growing up over the past couple of years Danny, a lot!"

"Yeah," Danny stood up. "It's what into I'm worried about."

"Danny don't." Frank cautioned.

"I'm sorry okay!" Jamie gripped his hair, "I don't know what else to say except that. I didn't think – I was trying to protect you. But instead I guess I just made it worse."

Danny stared at his brother, finally seeing the tormented look he'd been so keen to avoid. He sighed and sat back down on the edge of the bed. "I'm not angry at you kid. I'm just… angry at the fact you had to grow up so fast. But that doesn't mean I'm never gonna be there for you. I've always said I'm gonna be five steps behind you."

"That goes for all of us son," Frank added. Danny smiled his gratitude at his father.

"I should've told someone when all of this kicked off!" Jamie moaned. "That makes me such a coward… I felt like a traitor, like I was in on it because I was keeping his dirty secret. And all of you guys were being so nice and supportive, I just couldn't take it anymore. I'd already made up my mind not to tell you. Danny, you had just found out you were gonna have a baby! Joe… you and Dad were dealing with stuff every day on the streets and Erin, you had your hands full with Nikki. And I didn't want to drag Ma into this mess, she was working all night at the hospital! When was I supposed to find the time to tell you guys about this? You have lives too you know!"

Erin let out an audible gasp. "That doesn't mean we don't want you to include us in your life! Especially something as important as this – to even compare this to anything else -"

"I'm not Erin! I'm not saying that, I – I wanted things to get back to normal that's all."

"Jamie," Joe pulled up a chair right next to Jamie's bed and forced him to make eye contact. "Listen to me very carefully because what I'm about to say is gonna stick with you for the rest of your life. You're the victim here, do you understand? It's very important you understand that. It's our job to keep you safe as your family. That's what we do as a family, we get through it together. When one of us is hurt, we all bleed, that's the way we've been and that's the way we'll always be. It doesn't matter if we're… shot – on the street, or at war," he glanced at Danny. "We're no further than a feeling or prayer. And we'll always have each other's backs."

"Five steps behind!" Danny reminded with a wink.

Jamie couldn't smile. "I've messed up haven't I?"

"You're a kid, we expect you to make mistakes honey," Mary said smoothly.

Jamie scoffed, "Yeah but not like this! Missing curfew or getting a bad grade, smoking a joint or getting wasted a party – which I haven't done by the way," he added hastily, catching his brothers and father's raised eyebrow, "Those are mistakes a kid my age makes. But this one – is life or death. I've really blown it this time!" Jamie hugged Fudge closer to him. "I know we're a family of the law. And we're supposed to be strong. But the only advantage I've learnt by being here so far is that it doesn't matter how you're brought up or your circumstances…depression… it can happen to anyone at any time."

Danny felt a surge of strong love and sympathy for his baby brother. "You think it's all your fault don't you?"

"I don't think Danny, I know. I don't even know where he is and… if he's killed again."

Joe heaved sigh, "Well we've already searched possible killings in New York and neighbouring states, that could match his MO but it was so unique I don't think he'd try it again."

"Tell me you've found a lead at least!" Jamie pleaded.

"Sort of..." Joe said slowly, "But Dad said we can't risk doing anything that'll alert the press just yet. You understand don't you?"

Jamie nodded, his eyes glued to the floor.

"We're working on it son," Frank said in a resolute voice, "I promise, we're working on it."

"Wait." A thin smile stretched across Jamie's lips. "You guys are all working together?"

"Of course!" Erin shoved Danny aside and sat down on Jamie's bed, "It's just like Joe said. We're family!"

"What are you doing later?" Mary asked nervously.

"Well, I've got group therapy tonight." Jamie answered unenthusiastically.

"Group therapy huh? Is that where all the kids in here get together in a big circle and bitch about how bad their lives are?" Danny smirked.

Jamie laughed. "Yeah something like that. The doctors are confident that I'm on my way to recovery."

"Yay! That's great!" Erin said happily, "You'll be home soon!"

Jamie forced a smile. "Look I'm glad you guys are all working together – just as long as you don't fight. These things get done a lot smoother when there are more people on side."

Danny's mind which had been shut down due to all the stress and disappointment over the past week, suddenly came whirring back to life at Jamie's words.

"Wait – what did you just say kid?"

"What?"

"These things get done smoother when there are more people on side." Danny quoted.

"Oh, it's just something Coach Ryman said to us before our last game."

"I'm not really a philosophical geek," Danny said obviously.

Jamie rolled his eyes. "When there are more people working together, things get done faster and without a hitch."

"And did it work?" Danny's mind was exploding with a newfound theory.

"Yeah, we won, didn't we?"

They heard the door being unlocked, meaning their time was up.

The nurse casually stepped in. "Okay, Jamie we gotta get you to therapy." He proceeded to take Jamie's arm but he snatched it away.

"I know the way out!" he scowled, pushing past him. He turned to his family. "I'll see you later then."

"Yeah, bye kid!"

"Bye Jamie!"

"We love you!"

As they passed the nurse on their way out of the room, Danny glared at him fiercely. After hearing what they were like towards Jamie he wasn't prepared to give them the benefit of the doubt anytime soon. He carefully sidled up to Joe and spoke in a low voice so no one could hear them.

"What are you searching tonight?"

"Well," Joe sighed, "I was thinking maybe I should check out the area around the McCredie's old elementary school again. Maybe we missed something when we searched yester-"

"Listen, I think Brian was in on the massacre Joe!"

They exited out of Corbel into the fresh air where Joe turned to his brother in surprise. "What?"

"Didn't you listen to what Jamie was saying in there? These things get done smoother when…"

"There are more people on side," Joe finished, finally understanding. "You think there was more than one accomplice? That – both brothers were in on it?"

"That's exactly what I'm thinking!" Danny said in agitation. They carried on walking towards the car in silence.

Joe grabbed his brother's shoulder and voiced the question which had been on both of their minds for weeks now. "Why the hell would they want to help a murderer?"

"That's a question we're going to have to ask them." Danny said menacingly. "These guys are toast."

_**7:30pm**_

Jamie adjusted his video camera on his desk and switched it on record, wanting to record his day quickly before Craig came back from dinner.

"Hey," he whispered to the camera, trying to keep his voice down so the nurses wouldn't think he was talking to himself. "I'm back again. This is day number… ten in Corbel, the time now is seven-thirty pm. And I really wanted to do a quick message because… well… I'm depressed again." Jamie let out a watery laugh. "I know, I know, when am I not. But my family came by today and after seeing my parents, and my brothers and sister – I just keep feeling so guilty."

Jamie rubbed his tired face, "I feel like the worst son and brother and friend ever. You have no idea how much I hate myself for putting them all through this." Jamie's voice quivered as he spoke. "They don't deserve this, I feel like I'm putting them through hell. And I can't stand it." Jamie licked away the salty tears which were gathering on his lips.

"I had this thing, this morning called CBT which is Cognitive Behaviour Therapy. And it's basically all about how we think. Today we were dealing with self-esteem. I never used to have a problem with that… but now I feel like I can't do anything right anymore. You see, when people ask me why I'm so upset or sad, I don't have a definite answer for them. So what do I do? I just make one up to satisfy their question… I feel alone, empty and in pain all at the same time. I don't understand myself or why I feel this way." Jamie swallowed his tears.

"I found out today in art therapy that I have a lot of trouble controlling my anger. I guess I'm like my brother Danny in that retrospect. But I've just learned to repress it more and apparently that turns into depression. You're probably wondering what could be wrong in my life to make me feel this way. I have a loving family, I do. But the pressure that comes with being a Reagan is sometimes too much. I wanna be a cop so bad. Like my brothers, and my Dad and my grandfather, even my great-grandfather… but my mother convinces me I shouldn't – and I should be a lawyer instead. I feel pressured into being a lawyer just to keep my mother happy. It's not fair but that's just life isn't it?" Jamie wiped his eyes with his sleeve and tipped the camera lens back towards him.

"I talked to my doctor today about being discharged. He said that I was making good progress and in a couple of weeks it could be possible. And I don't know how to feel about that. The fact that I'm even in here is gonna stick with me for the rest of my life. So I'll do everything they tell me, and go through all the motions. Most of the time I just wear a mask. But if you could see inside me you would know I feel like I'm falling to pieces. I can't really talk about it but, outside these walls things are falling apart too. I keep it all inside and it only comes out when I'm alone… like now." Jamie's voice wavered. "Well, I guess that's it for today."

Jamie switched off the camera and sighed heavily. Danny was right. Talking about it helps.

_**10:00pm**_

Danny sat at the Reagan's kitchen table, pouring over the all the details they'd found for the McCredie's so far, with a pen wedged in between his teeth and his brow furrowed. It was so hard working this case in secret, without having to call upon anyone else for help. Joe was constantly 'borrowing' files for research purposes all though he said he was sure Renzulli was getting suspicious.

Danny circled a few anomalies on a phone record he was reading. He yawned, rubbed his face and went to pour himself another cup of coffee. As he was waiting for the pot to warm up, he stared absently out the window. A quick shadow darted past his eye! At an instant Danny snatched his gun off the table and hauled the back door open. He stepped out into the windy air, the trees castting dark shadows over the house and the light rain peppering his face. The porch light was on. Danny scanned the area around the kitchen window, carefully following his gun. He couldn't see anything. It definitely wasn't an animal, the shadow was way too big. He heard a crunch behind him and the soft padding of footsteps running away on the grass. Danny whipped round, his gun held steadily raised, his mouth was dry with anticipation. With his heart thumping, he swiftly crept towards the back door, his back to the wall. Had he been imagining the shadow? Was he really that tired? But then how would that explain the footsteps he heard? Did he really hear it?

Danny lowered his gun and headed back into the house. He packed up the rest of the papers back into the box, thinking that he should go home and get some sleep. Nevertheless, he still couldn't ignore the nagging feeling that someone was watching them. All of them.

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><p>To be continued...<p> 


	11. Chapter 11  The Third Accomplice

**Author's Note: **Hey guys! Once again a HUGE thank you for those of you that reviewed and alerted and favourited me! Well sorry for the wait but I had a lot to write about in this chapter and a lot is revealed, so here it is! And please review cause it helps me know what you guys think and want.

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><p><strong>Chapter 11 – The Third Accomplice<strong>

_**June 24th 2000**_

"Give us your keys Dad we're taking your car!" Danny said frantically running down the steps, his hand outstretched.

"Maybe we should wait until Erin gets back from work," Frank said reluctantly.

Danny sighed in frustration, "But this is our last chance!"

"I'm just saying that you don't know what you're going to find out so maybe you should have a lawyer present just in case you need to."

"Dad no!" Danny said impatiently. "We've been searching for weeks now and we've finally tracked McCredie's brother down! We combed through every city, every borough, scoured through the McCredie's in the nearest neighbourhood, going door to door! And then just last night Joe found out that the security clearance wasn't too far off, McCredie's just moved to a different neighbourhood that's all! We've already wasted too much time, way too much time! Come on Dad, please give us your keys!"

"I know…" Danny snatched the keys out of his father's hand and handed them to Joe before Frank could utter a 'but.'

"Go on get it in. Thanks Dad, you won't regret this." Danny quickly hopped into the passenger seat while Joe fired up the engine.

"Before I forget," Frank said leaning into the car, "I'm going to visit Jamie later today. Any message?"

"Whatever you do Dad don't tell him that we've only just found our lead," Joe said with exasperation, "It would probably just upset him."

"He already knows we're on it," Danny said, "But we don't need to tell him anything else, just tell him we miss him and we can't wait to see him. What time are you visiting him?"

Frank checked his watch, "Cab should be here any minute. Be careful and drive safe boys."

Frank saluted his sons' good luck as he watched them speed off into the distance, praying that after all these weeks of searching they'll finally come back with something.

Three hours later, Joe pulled up beside a run-down repair shop, Danny consulted the map and cursed.

"We've passed this place five times already!" he fumed at his brother. "I thought you said you knew where you were going?"

"Yeah I thought I did, I mapped out the journey last night! I know it's in this neighbourhood… somewhere." Joe said with some hesitation.

"We've been doing this for two weeks, and we've gotten nowhere! This is serious Joe!" Danny snapped.

"You think I don't think it's serious?" Joe shot back, "I was the one who was up all night tracking down the new address in the first place, and pinpointed the exact location so shut up!"

They drove a few more miles bickering. "Hold on!" Joe stopped his brother in mid rant and swerved into a tiny alleyway, "I think that might be their house right there!" he pointed to a tiny, run-down house at the other end of the alley, engulfed in smoke.

Danny squinted into the distance, "Whoa! You're kidding right?"

"No," Joe started to creep down the alleyway through a light drizzle of rain.

"Look at me, I'm actually trembling," Danny said holding out his shaking hand. "I just don't know how much more disappointment I can take." He studied the map again, his red marker hovering over it. It was covered with large red crosses from houses which they had visited over the past fortnight.

"Please let this be the right one," Joe prayed as they slowly pulled up to the house. He switched off the engine and the two of them just sat there in silence, staring at the decrepit house.

"Do you think we're doing the right thing here? Tackling this all by ourselves." Joe asked his big brother.

"Well what other choice do we have?" Danny replied with a frown, "This guy could lead us to the Sniper and then we can find him and arrest him before the press finds out. At least that way we know he'll be locked up and Jamie and Dean'll be safe when they broadcast it all over the world."

"Yeah but let's face it - we're not gonna find the Sniper right away, I mean look how long it took us to find the McCredies and they're just the accomplices who are alive! It'll be much harder trying to track down a ghost!" Joe pointed out in concern.

"So what are you saying, you wanna give up now?" Danny questioned touchily, "Leave it all to the professionals and let them do all the work while we just sit on our backsides and put our feet up?"

"No!" Joe barked, glaring at his brother in irritation. "I'm just trying to be practical! Which is more than I can say for you -!"

"Joe!" Danny grabbed Joe's arm to silence him. He'd seen a flurry of movement at the top window of the house. "Someone's definitely in there! It could be Brian!"

"And what if it isn't?"

"And what if it is?"

Danny and Joe stared at each other inquisitively for a few seconds. Thunder rumbled in the distance. Joe nodded and said firmly, "Okay, let's do this."

The brothers exited their car and scurried up to the house, shielding their faces from the bullets of rain. Danny rapped on the door twice.

The door suddenly creaked open and they saw a tiny face peering at them through the crack. "Yes?" the boy asked hoarsely.

"Hey," Danny greeted quickly trying to recover, "Are -are you Brian McCredie?"

"Depends who's asking?" he snapped rudely.

"I'm Detective Reagan and this is my brother Officer Reagan, may we come in?" Danny asked calmly, showing him his badge and trying to hide his glee at finally finding the right place.

"What's all this about?" Brian asked still not moving. The rain started to pelt down harder.

"We'll explain when we come in. May we come in?" Danny repeated. Brian hesitated then slammed the door in their faces. A second later they heard him fumbling with the chain. He opened the door and let them into his house. Both brothers automatically surveyed his appearance. He looked like he could be in his early twenties. His face was thin and pale and his dirty blonde hair was messed up at the back of his head. He shoved his hands deep into the pockets of his torn denim jacket, trying to avoid eye contact with the Reagan boys.

"How old are you?" Danny asked Brian curiously.

"Just turned twenty-four." Brian replied. "You still haven't told me what all of this is about?"

"You wouldn't happen to know where your brother Freddie is would you?" Joe asked as gently as he could. Brian's eyes flashed surprise and then panic but he covered it up quickly. Unfortunately for him, the Reagan's noticed.

"I uh, I haven't see him in months!" Brian said hastily, turning away from them and bustling into the kitchenette.

The Reagan brothers both exchanged sceptical glances. Clearly they weren't buying his bullshit. "Look man," Danny said as patiently as he could, following Brian into the kitchenette and scanning the room at the same time, "I know you know where he is. And you know we actually could arrest you."

"Danny," Joe muttered from the corner of his mouth, "cool it!"

"Excuse me?" Brian said angrily, "For what? I haven't done shit!"

"How about accessory to murder!" Danny said just as angrily.

"I never murdered anyone in my life!" Brian said horrified, "What are you talking about?"

"Come on Brian!" Danny said, losing patience, "I know that you know your brother was an accomplice in the Kings Plaza massacre!"

Brian swallowed hard but tried to maintain his glare. "I don't know what you're talking about!"

"And I'm also thinking that maybe you were involved as well." Danny continued, dropping his voice to a deathly growl.

Brian opened his mouth, his face contorted in denial but Danny furiously cut across him.

"Don't try and deny it! There's no way the Sniper could've pulled off his death hoax without another accomplice. And given the fact that you were the only one registered down on his emergency contact list… doesn't leave us with many options and it basically all narrows down to you. What did you do Brian hmm? Chauffeur him down to the bridge?" Danny breathed menacingly.

"Once again, I have no idea what you're talking about but I am not gonna say anymore to you without a lawyer present!" Brian raged.

Danny's eyebrows shot up. "Oh so you're screaming for a lawyer all of a sudden huh?" he turned to Joe and said casually, "He wants a lawyer now?"

"Yeah, yeah do you know what you're indirectly saying to us when you lawyer up?" Joe said to Brian indifferently.

"It means you're guilty Brian," Danny answered coldly. "And you've got something to hide."

"I'm not hiding anything," Brian said, instantly glaring at the floor.

"Don't look at the floor, look at me!" Danny ordered furiously. Brian glowered at him. "Look we're here because we have some new evidence that implicates you and your brother as part of the shooting at Kings Plaza."

Both Brian and Joe's eyes narrowed, Brian in suspicion, and Joe's in curiosity. Which evidence?

"The CCTV tapes at the mall?" Danny prompted. Joe bit his lip to stop himself from grinning. Well done Danny!

"They show you and your brother engaging in a very – uh – interesting interaction with the Sniper." Joe said playing along. Danny gave him a small but grateful nod. Of course it was all one big lie. The CCTV tapes from the mall had been stolen, and all of them had been replaced with some cartoon tapes of Elmer Fudd taking pot shots at bugs bunny. Danny thought it was an 'up yours' from the Sniper.

"No, you're wrong," Brian said shaking his head viciously, "All the real tapes have been burnt."

"How would you know that?" Joe said immediately. They didn't even know what had happened to the real tapes. All they knew was that they had been stolen. So, they had been burnt had they? Danny made a mental note to add destroying evidence on the list of charges.

"I – I –I heard it all over the news! The Sniper shot security and replaced all the tapes!" Brian stuttered, running his hand over his face in agitation.

"No Brian." Danny shook his head and said slowly, "That piece of information was never released to the public. I know. Now the only way you could've known about those tapes is if you were there or a part of it."

Brian started to tremble. "No," he muttered, "No, it's not fair, I didn't have any other choice."

Danny sauntered towards him, "You know Brian... that guy murdered a lot of innocent people. And he's still out there, probably killing more. If you wanna clear your conscience then do the decent thing and come forward."

"You don't know what you're dealing with when it comes to this guy," Brian said in a small voice.

"I think we've got a pretty good idea already given the circumstances," Joe replied lightly. "And if you tell us the truth and help us then we can help you. You can cut some sort of deal, reduced sentencing, that sort of thing. But only if you tell us what happened."

Brian sighed in defeat. He moved across to the living room and sunk down onto the couch, Danny and Joe followed him with curious eyes. Joe sat down in the armchair next to the couch while Danny just perched on the arm rest.

"I don't even know where to begin," Brian said unobtrusively.

"Well can you start by telling us anything you know about the Sniper and why he involved you and your brother his is sick plans?" Danny asked evenly.

"He's a friend of my brother's." Brian answered in a disgusted voice. "They were at high school together… Freddie was the only one who he kept in touch with after they graduation."

"Okay Brian listen," Joe scrambled in his jacket for his notepad and pen, "I need you to tell me the Sniper's name."

"And anything you can tell us about him as an individual," Danny added, extracting his own notepad and pen.

"Steve Bachman." Brian spat. Joe scrawled his name down in capitals. "That's his name. I – I don't remember much about him during the early years, I mean, I was just a kid myself. But during their high school years, he would always hang out at our house, with my brother. Smoking pot all the time, drinking, cutting school… that sort of stuff."

"What about your parents?" Danny asked.

Brian snorted, "Them? My father died when I was three and my mother has been in and out of prison since. We lost in touch. We lived with our grandmother but she was the equivalent of no parents, she let us do whatever we wanted – we basically raised ourselves. And Steve always seemed to like her. "

"What about Steve's folks where are they?" Joe asked.

"Steve's Dad left when he was a kid and his mother just gave up on him after a while. One time, Steve got drunk, stole a car and crashed it but Freddie took the fall because he was sober. That was the last straw for her. They fell out and he moved in with us, he would never acknowledge her presence. It was like she never existed. She died two years ago and Steve didn't even go to her funeral." Brian shook his head.

"What kind of a relationship did your brother and the Sn – Steve - have?" Danny asked Brian inquisitively.

"Well put it this way, Steve said jump and Freddie didn't even ask how high, he'd just jump."

"So Steve was the boss of both of them?"

"Yeah, always controlling. He had all these crazy ideas and my brother was dumb enough to go along with them!" Brian snapped.

"What kind of crazy ideas?" Joe asked quickly.

"Stupid ones. Like vandalizing private property, kidnapping neighbours dogs, going out to Central Park late at night and shooting homeless people with paintballs."

"Hmm that sounds like fun," Danny muttered sarcastically. "So what else?"

"It's almost as if… the older he got, the more warped he got…" Brian said cautiously.

"Warped in what way?" Joe asked frowning.

"In the kind of pranks he'd pull. In the end he got expelled from school because he set a girl's hair on fire!"

"Can you remember who the girl was? Was she a classmate of his or… just a friend?" Danny asked.

"Nah, she was his girl."

"They – they were going out?"

"Yeah," Brian murmured sourly, "Then she broke it off because she said he was too possessive and I don't think he handled the rejection very well. It really messed him up."

"In more ways than setting someone's hair on fire?" Danny asked in incredulity.

"Yes! He blamed her for everything! In his eyes, he got kicked out of school because of her and was never allowed to graduate! That made him mad! Really, really mad."

"So what did he do?"

"He would go on drunken rampages around town. He got sent to a therapist who told him that he had a lot of anger. Steve told my brother that there was only one place for it."

"The military." Danny finished. "Of course."

"Yeah he joined and then got kicked out of that last year." Brian said in disappointment. "It just made him even madder."

"What about the girl? Can you remember her name?"

"Lisa… Lisa Costas," Brian answered.

"Do you know what happened to Lisa?" Joe asked, knowing the answer deep in his gut.

Brian shrugged, "I never even saw her. I just know what my brother told me and from what I can remember. I don't know what happened to her after high school."

"You really think Bachman just let her walk away after he thought she ruined his life? You don't think Bachman would have wanted revenge?" Danny asked Brian in disbelief. "What, the thought never crossed your mind, not even once?"

"What difference would it make now if it did?" Brian challenged tiredly.

Danny and Joe raised their eyebrows at each other but they didn't say anything. Joe motioned for Brian to continue.

Brian rubbed his face and ploughed on, "After he got kicked out of the military last year he was a changed man… God he was so messed up. He kept saying that he wanted to kill people and he wanted them all to suffer. I don't know what possessed my brother to still keep him as a friend but he did. It's like Steve had this – this hold on him. And he started to brainwash my brother bit by bit until he became involved in his new group - Operation Annihilation."

"Operation Annihilation?" Danny asked very quickly, his pen indenting his notepad. "That was what he called the massacre at Kings Plaza? He had a name for it?"

"Yeah," Brian sighed shamefully, "It was part of his master plan to cleanse the materialistic people of this city."

"I'm sorry – cleanse?" Danny interrupted with repulsion, "Who does he think he is, God?"

"He thought that he could teach people a lesson. That no matter how much money you had – it didn't make you invincible." Brian eyes took on a glazed look. "He – he had this theory that if he could purify the world of all the materialistic people who used and wasted money like toilet paper then the world would be a much better place."

"That's harsh!" Joe said in an icy tone. "These people were just shopping, they were civilians. They were just going about their day like they're entitled to. How did he know they were rich?"

"It doesn't matter, the fact that they were even using the restrooms in The Kings Plaza Mall was enough to seal his opinion! It's one of the most upper class malls in the city. Just being able to get a job there is an honour! Steve and Freddie used to target that place for vandalism. Security always used to chase them away."

"Okay so he thinks rich people shop there, he wanted to get rid of them, go on," Danny prompted impatiently.

"Then he planned the shooting or – Operation Annhilation. He roped my brother into going along with it." Brian said dejectedly. "He planned the day, the time, everything."

"Including how to escape," Joe added. "Tell us about how he knew about the storeroom and the escape vent."

"He stumbled across it by mistake," Brian replied.

"By mistake?"

"Freddie got himself a job at the mall about ten months before, just so he could keep an eye on things from the inside. He was working at the Nintendo store and he knew there was a storeroom but he discovered the vent by accident one night while he was working by himself. He tested it out and found out that it led to the roof which overlooked the back end of the mall. Of course he told Steve right away." Brian rolled his eyes. "That just sped up the process, up until till then Operation Annhilation wasn't really going anywhere but now that Steve knew about the escape vent… things jut sorta… snowballed."

"So where do you become involved in all of this?" Danny asked suspiciously.

Brian gave him a crooked smile, "Thing is Detective… I was only there by accident. I work part time at the food court and usually I would get Saturday afternoons off, but I swapped shifts with a buddy of mine as a favour and took his lunch shift instead." Brian sniffed. "You should've seen the look on Steve's face when he found out I was there. He sort of… crept up to me, pressed a gun in my back, and told me to move it. We got together in the parking lot at around eleven forty-five am. Freddie handed me one of those throwaway phones so we could communicate with each other. It's no point asking me for it," Brian said quickly anticipating Danny's next question, "Steve already made sure I tossed it. So…we're in the parking lot, Steve and Freddie went over the plan one more time while Steve loaded up and got ready -"

"Loaded up?" Joe interrupted, "You were with him when he loaded his guns?"

Brian nodded regrettably, "Yeah. He even bought a vest which had more pockets so he could hold more ammo."

Danny snorted. "Unbelievable."

"Can you remember what kind of a gun he used?" Joe asked Brian.

"I can remember all of them!"

"All of them!" Danny quoted, "He- had more than one shotgun?"

"Yeah but I'm not very good with gun names, I only know what I picked up on." Brian said hesitantly.

"That's okay," Joe said reassuringly, "Anything will help." Joe and Danny gripped onto their notepads, ready to take down the gun details.

"He used a Benelli semi-automatic shotgun, a twenty-two point rifle with a scope, a pump action shotgun, a Sentinel, a WMR revolver, a Smith and Wesson , a Magnum revolver, a Browning pistol. And he also had a foot long Buck knife, a smoke bomb and carried over a thousand rounds of ammunition on him." Brian slumped back in his chair and rubbed his forehead tiredly.

"Then he put on his ski mask, his leather gloves, his ammunition vest and was ready to go." Brian sat upright suddenly, "I felt like I was gonna be sick! I felt disgusted with myself for going through with this!"

"Then why the hell did you?" Danny demanded in a raised voice.

"What the hell was I supposed to do?" Brian yelled, his hands thrown open. "When a guy has a gun held to your face you tend to go along with it!"

"What is he, your babysitter?" Danny scoffed. "He took your eye off you for one second, you could've easily alerted -"

"He threatened to kill more people." Brian said quietly.

Danny fell silent. "What are you trying to say?"

Brian inhaled deeply, "I'm saying that I'm no more of a killer than you are. I was the friggin lookout! All I did was check for cops and – and bring strays into the Nintendo store. The thought of getting more people hurt because of me, if I didn't do what he said and more people died… I just couldn't live with that one any more than I can live with myself right now."

"He was lying to you Brian," Joe said gently, "He would've killed them anyway, regardless of what you did or not."

"Yeah I know that now." Brian whispered. "I tried to warn people off you know? I stood guard but when I saw them crawling out of their hiding spots, trying to sneak past the Nintendo store I'd point them in the opposite direction so he wouldn't hear them."

Danny swallowed over the lump in his throat as he listened and watched the guy in front of him. This guy, manipulated into feeling guilty over something which was wasn't his fault and blaming himself for not doing anything to stop it. Just like Jamie was. "I know this must be hard for you. Thinking that you have no way out."

"How could you possibly know?" Brian said, glaring at Danny.

Danny exchanged another glance with Joe. "Our… little brother was in the Nintendo store when it happened. Him and his friends, they saw the whole thing."

"Oh God," Brian looked like he was about to hyperventilate, "please, please tell me he was a survivor?"

"Uh…" For some reason Danny found it hard to tell the truth to this guy. "He did but um… one of his friends didn't."

"No, aah no!" Brian's face crumpled and he buried his face in his hands. " I – I didn't know, I'm so sorry, if I could take it all back I would… I'm so sorry…" he sobbed.

"Hey," Joe handed him a tissue, "Here. Look, this why we're trying to find out where Steve is, he's still out there. So if you could tell us anymore about his whereabouts and how he got out that day, we'd really appreciate it."

Brian accepted the tissue graciously. "Am I going to get in trouble?"

"Well, that all depends on what you tell us," Danny answered kindly, "So again, if there's anything you can remember about that day, anything at all."

"He hid behind plants and nooks so he could target his victims anybody seeing him. Then he just opened fire." Brian shook his head again, "I was too scared to try and stop him. He just … mainly targeted people with designer gear. I guess that was a small part of his whole plan. Rich people."

"How did he get on top of the roof unseen? I thought our SWAT team had the whole building surrounded?" Danny asked.

Brian closed his eyes and pressed his fingers to his temple, "From what I know… he sent out my brother… disguising him as a hostage and told the hostage negotiator that he wanted some food and some stuff for himself and the people in the Nintendo store. Then while Freddie was out getting the food, he climbed through the vent, got onto the roof… and shot a couple of SWAT snipers… and then he lay flat on his stomach so no one could see him. Once he was clear, he quickly called me and started screaming at me to get over to our apartment which was right next to the mall -"

"Hold on, you guys had an apartment right next to the mall!" Danny checked, ripping off the pages off his notepad, eager for fresh paper.

"Yeah, Steve rented it out about three months before the shooting, under a fake name and he asked me to meet him there when he got out."

"What was the fake name he rented the apartment under?"

"Jackson Horner."

Joe absently scribbled the name and all the other necessary information down and then both brothers continued to stare at Brian, enthralled by the story that they had been anticipating to hear for nearly a month. Danny tried to contain his excitement. They were several steps closer to finding the Sniper or – Steve Bachman. They even had a name now! This was almost too perfect.

"He got lucky it came up for rent. Our apartment window overlooked the roof of the mall. Naturally, that's why he wanted it. He was able to shimmy down the drainpipe and then I covered him as he ran across to our apartment and climbed up the fire escape into our window and dispose of his disguise and only a few of his weapons. Then I drove his car right down to the Brooklyn Bridge while he followed a few minutes behind in a separate car. Once I got to the bridge I left his car with the door open and a few of his guns and his knife, wiped clean of fingerprints, in the car and then waited for him to pick me up. By the time the cops got there it looked like he'd committed suicide." Brian sunk back into the couch.

"Okay now we need to ask you a very, very important question Brian," Danny leaned forward towards him. "Where's Bachman?"

"Would it help if I said I don't know!" Brian said pathetically.

Danny let out a frustrated sigh and almost kicked the couch. "Brian if you're screwing with us!"

"I – I wasn't a part of the whole plan. My brother is the one who knows where he is! After we dumped his car, Steve dropped me off at Washington Square, threatened me and then just took off! He could be out of the country for all I know!"

Danny still looked unconvinced.

"Look," Brian lowered his voice, "I've just spilled my guts for you! If I knew, do you think I wouldn't tell you where he is like that!" He clicked his fingers. "I would. But I can't because I don't know! Prison is safer than him!"

"So where's your brother?" Joe asked softly.

Brian wiped his eyes, "He's working in a bar now, in Hell's Kitchen called Fitzgerald's Pub."

"Fitzgerald's Pub?" Joe repeated in surprise, "I know it well, our cousin runs a rival bar there in Hell's Kitchen."

The three of them stood up slowly.

"So what happens to me now?" Brian asked awkwardly.

"You need to come with us to the station and make a statement," Danny explained, wondering what the hell he was going to tell his boss. "It's okay, you're turning yourself in."

"I'm fine with it actually," Brian said calmly. "Like I said. Prison is safer than Steve Bachman. In fact, hell is probably safer than him."

Joe shrugged, "You knew him quite well. We're going to have to take your word for that one."

"Exactly. Which is why I'm telling you that if you're going to try and find him then be careful." He looked at Danny directly in the eye and it was a look of someone who had seen too much. Danny looked away, it was too much like the eyes of someone else he knew. His baby brother.

"Yeah, we're cops I think we got our backs covered, don't worry about us pal," Danny said facetiously and made to shove him out of the door but he resisted.

"No I'm serious!" Brian said with a panicked glint in his eyes. "He doesn't even have a soul."

Danny tried to nod but he couldn't. Instead he seized the front door open and the three of them marched out into the awaiting thunderstorm.

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><p>To Be Continued...<p> 


	12. Chapter 12  A Sunday Kind of Love

**Author's Note: **Thanks to all you guys that reviewed! Well here we are, a sunday dinner scene - lots of talking not much action, that's up in the next chapter (I'm trying to balance it out so the climax of the story will be better! Trust me it's worth waiting for!) So here it is, please review!

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><p><strong>Chapter 12 – A Sunday Kind Of Love<strong>

_**June 25th 2000**_

"Could someone pass the potatoes please?" Erin asked coldly, giving Danny one of her death glares.

Danny stabbed at his piece of pork moodily with his fork and returned the glare. Linda watched him and her sister-in-law expectantly, silently praying a fight wouldn't break out.

"Here you go honey," Mary said quietly, passing the dish of potatoes (which was right in front of Danny) to her daughter.

"So…the lettuce is good," Joe complimented shyly, toying with his salad.

"Thank you honey," Mary glanced at Danny who was aggressively attacking his food. "So… I'm getting the kitchen floor re-tiled…. If anyone cares."

No one said a word. They all just continued to eat. Linda gazed around the table before saying tentatively, "Wow. Good choice Mary. When are you getting that done?"

"Uh… Next week sometime."

Nobody said anything, they just continued to cut up or chew their food in silence. The only sound that could be heard was the clink of cutlery on plates and the soft tinkle of wine glasses. Every now and then they would cast an uneasy glance at the empty seat at the corner of the table next to Joe which should have been occupied by Jamie. Danny and Erin would be staring daggers at each other while Joe, Mary and Linda tried to mediate with forced conversation.

After a few more minutes of awkward silence, Danny let his fork fall to his plate with a clatter, shattering the tense atmosphere.

"This is such a crock of shit!" He whined.

"Daniel!" Mary gasped, "Watch your language at the table!"

"I'm sorry Ma," Danny snapped, "But this is stupid! Why should we have to tread on egg shells when we haven't done anything wrong?"

"Ha!" Erin jeered loudly, "Don't even get me started on that one!"

"Okay, Danny, Erin just cool it-"

"No it's okay Dad!" Danny interrupted, still glowering at Erin, "I wanna hear what miss high and mighty has to say!"

Erin slammed her wine glass down so hard, some wine actually sloshed out onto the table. "Do you have any idea the amount of explaining I had to do to my boss last night?" Erin thundered, "I had to explain to him why my two idiot brothers, a rookie detective and a rookie police officer, went and brought in a guy who is an accomplice to a big case which is supposed to be closed! Talk about salt and wounds!"

"Screw your boss, this is important," Danny murmured, turning his attention back to his food.

"For who? For Jamie or for your ego?" Erin muttered into her wine glass.

Danny's head snapped up and he fought very hard to ignore what his sister said. Everyone looked at them, attentively.

"I'm telling you Danny you are so lucky the press hasn't gotten wind of this yet. But just you wait," Erin ripped her meat apart with her knife, "they will."

"Hey, what is your problem huh?" Danny asked his sister angrily, "He confessed to everything!"

"Exactly!" Joe said defensively to his sister, "It wasn't a complete wasted visit, we know a hell of a lot more now than we did yesterday!"

"Including this Operation Annhilation," Henry added with distaste. "If you ask me this lousy bastard has everything coming to him! If it's a war he wants then it's a war he'll get!"

"You don't have to tell me twice I'm with you all the way on this one Grandpa!" Danny agreed through a mouthful of pork. "All the way."

"Danny was telling me everything that happened yesterday," Linda said meekly to the table. She shook her head. "It's just sick. What some people can do."

"Yeah, that's Steve Bachman," Danny drained his wine and began pouring himself some more. "One hundred per cent psychopath."

"Mmm and what happens when Brian McCredie gets released on bail and then runs away to warn him?" Erin asked airily.

"He would never do that," Joe said firmly.

"And you know this because?" Erin leaned towards her brother expectantly.

"I know he wouldn't! You didn't see him okay?" Joe started hacking into his meat fiercely. "He wouldn't just reveal the big master plan and then tell the guy, who by the way he is terrified of, that everything's all blown up in his face and he's played a huge part in doing that by talking to the cops!"

"You still should've just waited until I got back from work," Erin said in a clipped voice as she tipped some carrots onto Nikki's plate.

"Seriously? Who works on a Saturday anyway?" Danny scoffed.

"People who have only a few years out of law school in comparison for those who have ten! I was writing up a ten page deposition which my boss set me at the last minute." Erin answered coolly.

"Well we all have bad days." Danny said in an offhand voice.

"You try working your way up to the top when you have a small child to look after and your doesn't care because he's the Assistant District Attorney and an arrogant, sexist jerk!" Erin prattled vigorously.

"Who's that Rossellini?" Joe asked, amused.

She nodded and rubbed her forehead, "And Johnny gets to work on all the good cases and I'm always just left to shadow the DA and sit in on hearings, filing papers and making suggestions or comments every now and then. You wait, one day I'll be the DA and we'll see who's laughing."

"Speaking of which, your husband not gracing us with his presence today?" Danny asked mockingly.

"Don't start Danny," Erin warned.

"What, I'm not allowed to ask where my favourite brother-in-law is?" he retorted sarcastically.

Erin hastily set her knife and fork down and sighed. "If you must know, he's gone to Atlantic City for a few days, okay?"

"Atlantic City?"

"Yep. To visit his parents." Erin answered curtly, helping herself to some peas and avoiding eye contact with anyone. Frank scrutinized his daughter closely.

Danny narrowed his eyes. "Why did he visit them without you and Nik?"

Erin shifted uncomfortably in her seat,"Because I'm needed here – you know that. Great food Ma."

"Yeah but that still doesn't explain -"

"Look please can we talk about something else!" Erin said evenly, her tone and the glint in her eye suggesting to everyone that she was on the verge of screaming.

"How about asking if your brother's okay?" Frank suggested, casually polishing off his meal.

Everyone exchanged guilty glances.

"Of course, how is Jamie doing Dad?" Danny asked humbly.

"He's hanging in there," Frank replied, "The doctors are very confident that he could be in recovery soon."

Joe rubbed his hands in agitation. "It sure would be good to tell him some good news once he's been released. Like the Sni – Steve Bachman – has been arrested."

"Well, all the more reason why they need you on their side sweetie," Mary said with reassurance, she gently patted her daughter's hand. "You could talk to your boss and maybe offer this Brian McCredie a deal for reduced sentencing?"

Erin snatched her hand away, "I can't pull those kind of strings Ma!"

"Who's asking you to pull any strings?" Danny asked incredulously, "It's a simple request. Can you help the guy or not?"

"In case you haven't been listening, I answer to a much higher power," Erin replied with displeasure, "And you probably don't want me to point out that you do too!"

"That being said, what did your boss say honey?" Mary asked Danny.

"Detective Sorenson? He was actually pretty impressed with my detective work so far!" Danny bragged, leaning in his chair with an air of arrogance. Erin tutted.

"Excuse me your detective work?" Joe interjected huffily.

Danny jerked his head, "Fine, our detective work!"

"What about the rest of New York's police department?" Erin pressed.

"I already explained everything to the Commissioner Erin," Frank told his daughter comfortingly.

"You did?" Erin quickly turned to her father, "I didn't know that."

"Yeah when did you seen him Dad?" Joe asked, also in surprise.

"As soon as you and your brother told me everything, I personally drove to Mr Lewis's house and told him everything. From Dean's confession right down to Operation Annhilation."

"And how did Harrison take it?" Mary asked her husband nervously.

Frank wiped his mouth with his napkin while the rest of the family watched him in anticipation. "Well put it this way… it's a good job I'm old friends with him. The Mayor on the other hand… not so much." And with those words, Frank began to clear away the dishes for dessert, leaving his stupefied family at the table.

Twenty minutes later, Danny finished drying all the dishes. He didn't realize how much he missed Jamie beside him, his dishes companion and the quiet but strong presence at the dinner table. He dried his hands and sauntered into the dining room where the Reagan's were all sitting.

"Where's Erin?" Danny asked with a frown.

"Oh, I think she's in the living room," Linda answered absently and carried on talking to Mary and Betty.

Danny shrugged and proceeded into the living room where Erin was seated on the couch with her back to him and the phone tightly pressed to her ear. He was about to turn back when he heard her sniff.

"Look it's me. John if you're there please pick up the phone. I really want you to come back home. I – I – just wanted to say that I'm sorry. And… I'll never wear that outfit again if it upsets you so much!" She cried suddenly. "I only did it for you – I thought you'd like it – but – I had no idea that you wouldn't!"

Danny recoiled in shock. He felt bad for eavesdropping on his sister but screw morality he was a cop.

"And I know you didn't mean it but – all those things you said – to me… you really hurt me." Erin sobbed into the receiver. "It's been really difficult trying to explain things away here. So please come back John, I miss you. You were right, it is all my fault… that dress made me look cheap! If you're there pick up! I really need you to -" She broke off in surprise as the phone was snatched out of her hand. She gazed up at Danny who hung up the phone.

"So, visiting or living with his parents?" Danny questioned.

Erin heaved an angry sigh and buried her face in her hands.

"I could kill him," Danny growled, pacing up and down with the phone still clenched in his hand.

"Danny!" Erin groaned, "I'm serious, I don't want you getting involved. I still remember the last time."

"That was almost six years ago, you guys weren't even married yet!" Danny stated angrily. "I was defending your honour and you got pissed at me over it! It's like you think the sun shines out of his ass!"

"Like you've never lost your temper with Linda, not even once?" Erin challenged.

"No, not like that, Erin no!" Danny denied fiercely.

"Like what?" Erin asked.

"He got upset with you because of something you wore?" Danny said slowly.

"Well maybe I should feel flattered that he feels so jealous," Erin murmured, fiddling with the tassels on the cushion which was resting on her lap.

Danny looked at her incredulously. "Tell me I didn't just hear you say that?"

"I took vows," She said seriously. "For richer for poorer, till death us do part -"

"Yeah and if Bachman finds out that the whole NYPD know about Operation Annhilation, death could do its part more sooner than you think." Danny said with intent.

"Danny, don't say that!" Erin gasped.

"I'm just trying to make a point! Now Brian McCredie's bail hearing is tomorrow, Jamie's probably going to get released soon, you gotta remember your priorities!" Danny rebuked.

"My marriage is my priority!" Erin retorted sharply.

"And your brother's safety isn't?" Danny shot back just as sharp. "I get it." He held his hands up in defeat, "As long as Johnny's happy, the rest of the family can go and hang!"

"That's not fair!" Erin moaned, close to tears again. "You don't even give him a chance!"

"Why should I when he's never given us one?" Danny snapped.

Erin struggled to find the right words to say.

"Yeah," Danny sneered, slamming the phone back into the holdall, "You just sit there and think of how you're gonna defend him this time. I tell you – for a damn good lawyer you're wasting all your talent sticking up for him!Save it for the real victims. This is all gonna end in tears again Erin, and when it does - don't say I didn't warn you!"

Danny didn't wait for Erin to respond, he just stormed out of the living room and back into the dining room.

"Where's your sister?" Mary asked, noticing Erin wasn't following Danny.

"She's upset over her beloved Johnny boy." Danny answered bitterly as he sat back down. "I heard her talking to him on the phone. He's definitely moved out for the time being."

"Are you a hundred per-cent sure that it was John on the phone Danny?"

"Yes Dad. I heard her apologizing to him. He's upset her again and we're left to pick up the pieces – again!"

"So what did Erin say?" Linda asked with concern.

"Same as usual, she tried to defend him." Danny spat. "And do you know why they fell out? Because he didn't like the outfit she wore!"

"That's out of order!" She said indignantly.

"That's not the worst of it! Do you know what she said? 'Maybe I should be flattered he's so jealous!'" Danny mimicked.

"Erin's always different when she's around him – weaker!" Henry said assertively.

Frank raised his eyebrow at his father. "Pop -?"

"It's true!" Henry interrupted abruptly, "And it's no point denying it Francis because we all know you think it too! That boy is her Achilles heel, has been from the first day they met in college!"

"A woman's place is with her husband," Betty said with authority, throwing her husband a dirty look, "Erin's a grown woman and she took a vow and made a strong commitment. These days, young people enter into marriage like they're walking into a building! If they're not happy with it, then they can just walk right out instead of sticking around."

"Ma," Frank said cautiously, "I understand you, I do! But John's taken advantage of Erin's good nature too many times. We've always had to just... sit back and let it happen."

"For Erin's sake," Danny said shaking his head. "She won't let him go."

"Too right she won't!" Betty said with an affirmative nod. "She's a good girl and she values her morals. And she just wants to have a marriage like me and your grandfather and your mother and father."

"Yeah," Frank added doubtfully, "But Pop never laid a finger on you though did he? And I never hit Mary."

"Now that's taking it a bit too far Dad," Joe said sternly. "We don't know that he's been physical."

"It's just a matter of time," Henry said with indifference. "When you're married to a ticking time bomb, it could go off at any second. Seen it with a lot of cops back in my day, of course they would cover it up but when you're wired that way..." Henry trailed off deliberately and opened his palms up, letting them think their own conclusions.

"What is wrong with me?" Mary looked up to the ceiling, one hand twisted the cross on a chain she had around her neck. "As if I didn't have enough worry going on..." She looked at Jamie's empty seat, "What – what did I do wrong?"

"You did nothing Ma!" Joe said sincerely, "You are the best mother in the world. Erin and John have had problems before and they always manage to sort themselves out."

"I know, I know!" Mary waved her hands in exasperation, "But I just think that after everything that happened with Jamie and now you and Danny trying to find the Sniper – I thought Erin was the last one I had to worry about! What's she doing now?"

"Trying to make up her mind whether she should go to Atlantic City and talk to him," Danny answered grimly. "It's almost like she's forgotten that we're trying to nail a psychopath who almost killed our brother!"

"I've always tried not to interfere too much in my kids' lives." Frank said with sincerity.

"There are limits Francis!" Henry pointed out, "Look at Jamie! What kind of a state would he be in now if Danny hadn't interfered, I dread to think."

"Exactly. This might have the opposite effect Pop. We could push Erin away and lose her for good." Frank rose to his feet and headed straight for the kitchen.

Later that evening when the evening atmosphere began to sink in Danny received a call on his phone regarding information about Steve Bachman. Excitedly he headed straight for the kitchen to tell his father of this piece of information when he stopped again, for the second time that evening. Eavesdropping was not usually a form of habit which Danny was accustomed to but it seemed that lately, everyone in the Reagan family were keeping secrets.

Danny saw his father seated at the kitchen table, looking despondent and deep in thought. Mary poured a few drops of scotch in his coffee and pushed it towards him.

"Here you go Frank, get this down you it should help." She sat opposite him and watched him with concern. "I know how you feel."

Danny heard a soft padding behind him, he turned quickly and saw Joe and Erin creeping up behind him. They listened to their parents talk.

"I was up all night going over the conversation I had with Harrison last night Mary," Frank sighed, "He's the Commissioner for a reason. He has great insight into the lives of people, always has done. He suggested that I take some time off for personal reasons, to deal with my family issues. I told him I didn't need to but… well it's – it's…"

"What Frank?" Mary prompted. Erin leaned in closer, Danny pushed her back. "Talk to me."

"It's a lie and I just can't bear the pretending anymore!" Frank stated emotionally.

Danny felt his stomach tighten sickeningly; the one person he looked up to was now showing weakness and was worried about the family. If his father, Frank Reagan was worried about them then what chance did the rest of them have?

"What are you talking about Frank?"

"I'm talking about us pretending like everything's okay, and that we're all happy – and it's all going to turn out fine! God help us in the future!" He took a long sip of his coffee.

"Frank stop that!" Mary scolded. "We have raised our children well!"

Frank turned to her in disbelief. "Have we? Look at our track record."

"Oh Frank now's not the right time -!"

"We've got our only daughter married to a potential wife-beater!" Frank held up his thumb.

Erin let out a small gasp and shook her head fiercely, Joe covered his hand over her mouth lest they get caught eavesdropping.

"Our eldest son uses all his anger out on suspects, earning himself an IA investigation every other month!" Frank continued in despair, holding up his index finger.

It was Danny turn to gasp. He wasn't taking out his anger on them he was just… angry with them there's a difference.

Frank unfolded his third finger, "And then there's Joe – we don't know what's gonna happen to him out there on the streets every day."

Joe hung his head. Danny knew how desperate his brother was to show their father how dedicated he was to the job.

"And then…" Frank's voice quivered as he unfolded his fourth finger, "We've got our youngest… living in a psychiatric hospital!" Frank rested his forehead on his fingertips, his shoulders were shaking, "And I'm going out of my mind with worry for him!"

Danny could feel his heart rate quicken, why? He thought Jamie was doing okay, that he was on his way to recovery.

"Frank," Mary said ominously, picking up on Danny's thoughts, "I thought you said Jamie was on his way to recovery?"

"That's what Dr Rimmer said yes! But I know my son Mary! And I know how he looks when he's suffering from depression. He's only sixteen and already on all these… anti-depressants and anti-anxiety pills!" Frank said with apprehension. "Sweet sixteen and on medication," he let out a watery laugh, "I'm sure that'll go down real well on his college application."

Danny could feel the tear involuntarily leak from his eyes. No, no, no! This was all going so wrong! This isn't supposed to be happening now. Jamie was supposed to be getting better not worse. Their family was supposed to be pulling together not falling apart.

"Listen to me," Mary ordered, seizing her husband's hand in hers, "You are a brilliant son, a brilliant, wonderful husband and a brilliant, wonderful, doting father!" Mary said gently. "Our kids have grown up. Jamie will be going off to college soon. Half the kids his age in the world are on medication for worse reasons but they still manage to pull through. We've done what any parents can do. We've taught our children to love life and make the most of it – and they have. Isn't that right kids?" She called, turning towards the doorway where they were hidden.

They stumbled into the kitchen in their haste with Danny in the lead. They straightened up, embarrassed at being caught.

"I never can understand how you do that Ma," Joe muttered in awe.

"Eyes in the back of my head!" Mary replied proudly.

"Dad what's happened?" Danny asked, marching straight towards his father with Joe and Erin trailing behind him.

"What hasn't happened?" Frank counteracted.

"We're lucky we've got Brian! He could be our star witness!"

"I wasn't thinking about that Danny," Frank said sadly.

"Jamie," Danny said instantly as if he had read his father's mind. Frank nodded.

Danny immediately pulled up the chair next to him, looked him straight in the eyes and said steadily, "Listen Dad, we made a deal that we were gonna see this through till the end! Now we are so close! Just a couple more steps and it could all be over."

"It's still a long shot Danny," Frank responded. "It's only a matter of days before someone leaks to the press and when that happens…" Frank finished his sentence with a sip of coffee.

Danny leaned back and then addressed the rest of his family, "I was coming in here to tell you that I just got a call regarding a background check on Lisa Costas, you know, Bachman's high school sweetie? About two months after her graduation she was found shot dead in a video store. Apparently, witnesses say that the shot was fired from outside the store, through the window."

"Just like so many people in the mall," Mary said sadly.

"What did the police do?" Erin asked Danny anxiously.

"They marked her down as being a civilian at the wrong place at the wrong time, in the midst of some mafia war." Danny said with disgust. Frank hung his head in shame.

"What?" Joe gasped in incredulity. "You're kidding me?"

"It was a video store in Pelham Bay in 86. Literally four months after John Gotti escaped an attempted assassination via car bombing!" Danny said animatedly to his brother.

"So…what does that have to with anything?" Joe asked confused.

"It was around about the same time when the Luchesse-Genovese alliance was forming in New York City prompting a war with the Gambino family." Frank explained solemnly, "I remember it well. Cops all over the city were put on alert. Extortion, drug trafficking, murder, you name it – they called it the most violent reigns in American Mafia history. If you ask me, it was the perfect cover up."

"Exactly!" Danny exclaimed, rising to his feet and starting to pace actively. "I'm willing to bet you anything our boy Bachman stalked her and then shot her from outside. It's textbook! Guy falls in love, starts acting like the possessive, jealous boyfriend, she wants to get out of the relationship so she breaks it off, he freaks out and goes on to seek revenge. A kind of – 'if I can't have you no one else can' type of act."

"It's the ultimate love story," Erin muttered sarcastically. "So what about Bachman, did you pull up a background check on him too?"

"Yeah," Danny answered with a grim expression, "This guy's been busy. Real busy. He's been in and out of prison for a whole variety of stuff from attempted rape to ABH."

"But surely he should've got a proper conviction!" Erin said in outrage.

Danny shrugged. "Lack of evidence. This guy's good at covering up his tracks, and manipulating other people to take the fall for his dirty work. All the people convicted in reagrd to his offences are connected to him in some way. He's... a real psychopath."

"Yes he is!" Frank interjected crossly, "It's not just Jamie I'm worried about. This Steve Bachman sounds like a nasty piece of work Danny. I worry about you and Joe going into this investigation. I know you're a good detective but maybe we should just leave it for the guys who have more experience."

"Dad please," Danny begged, "This has nothing to do with my career! He involved my brother. This is personal. I want in."

"Me too." Joe whispered.

"Steve Bachman could be well out of the country by now Danny," Mary said cautiously to her son.

"How do you know that?" Danny challenged, "How do you know that he's not trying to keep tabs on Jamie and Dean, check they're not screwing things up? In fact, how do you know it wasn't him I heard lurking outside this house the other night huh? Jamie lives here and Dean lives literally next door."

No one said anything. Danny had a valid point.

"Danny we still have the odd problem that Freddie McCredie knows who you are," Frank said softly, "He's seen you, talked to you remember. You can remember him, I'm sure he'll remember you."

Danny jerked his head in an irksome manner, "So, I'll wear a disguise . I'll make sure I'm not seen. He won't know who I am, he doesn't even know my name."

"When you bought Jamie's birthday present at the Nintendo store, did you pay by credit card or cash?"

Danny sighed and resisted the urge to roll his eyes, "I paid by credit card but it's okay, he was just assisting me, someone else was at the checkout."

"Yes but still… they have your signature. I don't know Danny…"

"We'll be careful Dad." Joe reassured, "We'll have all the back-up we need in disguise as well."

Danny lowered his voice, "This is could be our only shot at finding Bachman. I swear he doesn't know my name and I was off duty so I was wearing my street clothes when I bought Jamie's present. I never told him I was a cop, he won't know Jamie and me are related, it's all good."

"No it isn't all good Danny!" Erin chastised. "Exactly what are you hoping to achieve by going in there undercover?"

"We're just gonna feed him some false information, shake the tree, see if anything falls like we did with Brian – and let me tell you it worked!" Danny exclaimed happily.

"And then what?"

"Then -then we're gonna keep a close eye on him and see where he leads us -"

"No!" Frank said suddenly, Erin and Danny jumped.

"Dad?"

"I don't want you talking to him." Frank drained his coffee and stood up, "If you're going to arrest him then you should just do it – I don't want to take any risks here. He could be armed, if he finds out who you really are, he pulls it out and shoots... also... if he gets wind that there's something wrong he'll be the first to contact Bachman."

"He might not," Joe said carefully, "Not if we keep an eye on him properly."

"I still don't want to take that risk. Bachman will know Jamie and Dean have said something and they're lives will be put at risk. No just arrest him." Frank glanced at the half-empty bottle of scotch but didn't act upon it. "Right, I'm going to turn myself in for tonight. Goodnight."

"Night Dad." Joe said smiling.

Erin rose to her feet and hugged her father. "Goodnight Daddy. Everything will work out you'll see."

Frank released his daughter reluctantly, "Are you… and John okay?"

"Yes," Erin replied through a forced smile, "Me and John are working stuff out Dad."

"Hmm," Frank continued to look suspicious, "If he so much as looks at you wrong, you'll tell me won't you?"

"Of course I will!" Erin laughed, "I'm telling you, you don't need to worry. Now you should probably get some sleep."

"I will, night everybody!"

"Night Dad, sleep well!" Danny called cheerfully.

Frank saluted him and then left the kitchen. Mary excused herself, bade her children goodnight and then hurried after he husband.

Once they were out of earshot, Danny turned to his siblings anxiously, "I'm telling you, if we don't find Bachman soon and get Jamie safe, Dad's gonna crack up completely."

"Look who's talking!" Erin retorted.

"I'm not cracking up!" Danny stated sensitively. "Dad needs me. My brother needs me…"

Joe sighed, "I understand Dad's point though. What's happened to us? A family crisis used to be when we all wanted to use the bathroom at the same time." Erin nodded grimly.

"What kind of a sentencing deal do you think the DA's office could cut the McCredie's?" Danny asked his sister.

"Bearing in mind the fact that they were just accomplices and never actually shot anyone," Joe added.

"In the car on the way over to central booking, Brian kept hinting at immunity -?"

"Immunity? You've got to be joking, even an experienced lawyer won't be able to swing that one," Erin mumbled. She heaved a heavy sigh as she contemplated. "The DA will probably need a lot of convincing to go easy on them because it's such a big case so we'll be lucky to get leniency. But for Brian only."

"And what about Freddie McCredie?" Joe asked nervously.

"I think he can avoid the death penalty given the fact that he never actually, physically shot anyone and if you give him a chance to turn himself in like his brother, that could also help reduce his sentence. Maybe even give him the possibility of parole." Erin replied with some certainty.

"And if he doesn't?" Danny asked impatiently, "What kind of a sentence are we looking at, ball park figure? Just so I know what to threaten him with when I've got him in my sight."

Erin hesitated before replying thinly, "Twenty to life without the possibility of parole."

Joe nodded in understanding. "That sounds fair. Okay so tomorrow we arrest accomplice number two."

"Don't forget that Brian's bail hearing is tomorrow morning," Erin reminded them sternly. "What time are you gonna – meet – with Freddie?"

"Evening." Danny answered shortly. "We're gonna go about our day as usual and then – meet – him in the evening."

"Well in that case I suggest you get some rest. It's gonna be a long day tomorrow." Erin announced before striding out of the kitchen.

Danny jerked his head towards the door and lowered his voice, "What do you think is gonna happen with that worthless husband of hers?"

Joe gave Danny a warning look, "I don't know but whatever happens you have to remember that it's Erin's marriage. If she wants to take him back that's her decision."

"But -"

"You can't get involved Danny, especially after what happened last time!" Joe reprimanded.

"Yeah, poor Jamie. Some birthday party that turned out to be!" Danny said guiltily.

"Me and Dad holding you back while Jamie and all his friends looked on in a big circle chanting bitch fight!" Joe mumbled in embarrassment. "That must've earned him popularity points."

"Hey, at least I bought some liveliness to the place!" Danny laughed, holding his hands up, "How many other kids can say their big brother fought their brother-in-law at their eleventh birthday party? And won!"

Joe resisted the urge not to laugh. "Everything always has to come back to Jamie doesn't it? He's the heart of this family."

"Yeah, he's had to put up with a lot of crap from me over the years -"

"We all have!" Joe muttered.

"And…" Danny continued, ignoring him, "I know that I'm gonna do everything I can to make him feel safe again."

"We could have a war on our hands if we piss off Bachman," Joe said forebodingly.

Danny just smirked. "Bring it on."

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><p>To Be Continued...<p> 


	13. Chapter 13  Two Down

**Author's Note: **Thanks once again for you guys who reviewed! I cannot wait for s2! Even though it doesn't show in the UK till January I'm so gonna watch em' online! Anyway, back to the story - this chapter and the next involves the capture and interrogation of Freddie McCredie so read it and tell me what you think!

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><p><strong>Chapter 13 – Two Down…<strong>

_**June 26th 2000**_

The Reagans had agreed to meet up at the house that morning to go over the plan before branching off. Danny shadowing his boss, Senior Detective Sorenson, Joe touring the streets with Renzulli and Erin would be present at the bail hearing of Brian McCredie. Later in the evening Joe and Danny would arrest his brother Freddie, the main accomplice in the shooting and best friend of the Sniper.

"Morning family!" Danny greeted as he entered the kitchen. Joe was seated at the table while Mary bustled around the kitchen.

"Hey Danny!" Joe called back.

"Where's Erin?" Danny asked with a frown, noticing that his sister wasn't there. "She can't be running late?"

Erin glided into the kitchen, beaming, the phone held to her ear. "Yeah I love you too, I'll see you back at home tonight? Great!" She hung up the phone and cradled it, only then noticing everyone glaring at her. "What?" She asked innocently.

"You haven't taken him back?" Danny asked suspiciously.

"Well…" Erin smiled apologetically. "He called me last night after I got back and he was being so kind to me -"

"And that impressed you did it?" Danny interrupted scathingly.

"No but -"

"Dad's gonna be upset!"

Mary slammed the frying pan down and whipped around to face her children, "Upset? Upset? Didn't any of you see him last night? He'll be more than just upset!"

"That's what I meant Ma!" Danny muttered irritably.

"Johnny said that he was really, really sorry for the way he behaved," Erin said confidently.

"Oh, he's really, really sorry! Well that's all right then!" Danny retorted, every word oozing with sarcasm.

"He's still my husband, we're married!" Erin responded heatedly. "I took vows and I intend to keep them!"

"If it was down to me you'll be filing for divorce, Catholic or not!" Mary picked up the frying pan and started shaking it at her daughter.

"Yeah well it isn't down to you is it!" Erin bit back. She glared at Danny, "Neither of you!" She stormed out of the kitchen.

"You were a fat lot of help!" Mary barked at Danny. She started scrubbing the pan furiously.

"Ha! Me?" Danny scoffed. "What about you? I thought you were gonna kill her with that damn frying pan!"

He sat down next to Joe as Frank walked in buttoning up his cuffs. "What's going on in here? I just ran into Erin in the hallway, she looked like she'd been crying?"

"Oh just leave her Dad!" Danny snapped, "It's her own fault. If she wants to gravitate back to him, let her do what she wants. As long as she's turning up to Brian's bail hearing, that's all that matters."

"What time does it start?" Frank asked sipping his coffee.

Danny checked his watch, "In about an hour." He rose to his feet, "I should probably get going to work."

"Yeah me too!" Joe followed suit.

"So we'll meet up tonight in Hell's Kitchen just outside Fitzgerald's Pub," Danny confirmed.

"I don't think you need me to tell you boys to both be careful," Frank said pointedly, unfolding the newspaper.

"We're gonna be fine Dad don't worry," Danny muttered rolling his eyes, "Everything will be under control." Both boys left the house.

Mary turned to her husband and sighed, "Why do I always get a bad feeling every time he says that?"

"Instincts," Frank replied without looking up from his paper.

_**11:29am**_

Danny's phone rang just as Detective Sorenson was cuffing some convict they had just chased into a subway station in Queens.

"Reagan?" Danny panted.

_"Hey, it's me!"_ Erin chirped, _"The hearing just finished and I thought you should know that Brian McCredie just made, bail."_

"Tell me everything and don't miss a thing out," Danny ordered as he followed his mentor and their offender back to the car.

_"Well the judge went easy on him because he showed genuine remorse, it was his first offense and he was never initially a part of the whole thing. Also, he's offering us any information we want about Bachman and his brother. All in all I think it went pretty well!"_ Erin said satisfied.

"What are the bail conditions?" Danny asked while mouthing, 'it's my sister,' to Sorenson who nodded in understanding.

_"He is to remain in New York City and is not to have any contact with his brother."_

Danny rested his hand on top of the hood of his car and leant against it in exhaustion, "Well – that shouldn't be too hard seeing as he'll be locked up by the end of today."

_"Are you sure you're up for this tonight Danny?"_ Erin's voice sounded concerned, _"You sound tired."_

"Yeah because I've just chased a five-foot eight sucker into a substation! It's okay Erin. We can't wait any longer. We have a warrant, we have a raging psychopath on the loose, and we have an arrest to make tonight! I'm not gonna waste any more time on this!" Danny murmured through gritted teeth.

Danny heard his sister sigh heavily on the other end, _"Okay fine. I just hope you know what you're getting into."_

Danny rolled his eyes, "I'll be fine sis, listen have you called Joe and Dad yet." He got into the car.

_"No, I'm going to do that now. I thought you should be the first to know."_ Erin replied.

Danny let out a long sigh, "I tell you I'm going to sleep for three weeks when Bachman is sitting on death row."

_"Er… yeah about that,"_ Erin started hesitantly. _"I don't want you getting your hopes up about getting Bachman the death sentence just yet."_

"What? Why the hell not?"

_"We can charge him with a hundred counts of murder but in the end it's the jury who'll vote for execution. And sitting in on Brian's trial today made me realize that no matter how hard the prosecution will fight for justice, there's always gonna be an opposing team that could easily swing otherwise."_ Erin explained in a tense voice.

"That's bull!" Danny exclaimed crossly.

_"That's the law Danny!"_

"So are you telling me that execution is too heavy a punishment after what he's done?" Danny said loudly, causing several people nearby to scuttle past looking scandalised.

_"No, I'm just saying that Bachman's lawyer could plea insanity. And given his history the jury could agree with him."_ Erin said heavily.

"Nah, the jury will never buy that!" Danny dismissed, "We've checked into his background remember? He has no history of mental illness that can be proven."

_"It doesn't matter. It all depends on what the jury see in court before them. They'll take into account - his… appearance, his attitude… just to see if he'll fit the bill."_

"Then he'll play it up!" Danny stated emphatically. His lawyer will tell him everything you've just told me and advise him to come to his trial looking like a paranoid - anxious - depressed – schizophrenic or whatever! The jury will lap it up!"

_"I know. If there's anything Bachman's good at we know it's manipulation. Anyway, I can tell my boss that we can also tackle the subject of mental illness on our side. When Jamie's put on the stand they can see that. They'll see what Bachman put him through and then they'll be able to see what a real… you know… mentally ill - well, you know what I mean."_ Erin finished timidly.

Danny was unaware that he was clenching his fists. "Yeah," he said through gritted teeth. "Let's put our already fragile brother back in court – like he hasn't suffered enough!"

_"There's nothing I can do Danny!"_ Erin said heatedly. _"Jamie and Dean have to testify – they're important witnesses! Without them - we won't have enough!"_

"We'll have loads to go on!" Danny said hotly. "They shouldn't have to see him, not after what he did!"

_"Danny I want to protect Jamie as much as you do, of course I do! But putting them on the stand could lock in our chances of getting Bachman for good."_

"I just - hate the idea of them having to face his ugly mug after everything that's happened. Can't we – put them on video monitor or something?" Danny asked hopefully.

_"No, they only do that on child abuse cases."_

"Okay, well feel free to jump in and pitch your ideas, you are the lawyer you know!" Danny muttered irritably.

_"Danny I'm working on it! I'm not an ADA yet. I have rules to follow and a reputation to build first before I can pitch any important decisions."_ Erin said firmly.

"Right." Danny bit his tongue so as not to say something sarcastic to his sister.

_"Danny I gotta go, I've got another court case to sit in on before lunch and I'm already late, but… call me when you've arrested Freddie McCredie and keep me updated okay?"_

"Okay bye." Danny hung up and turned to his boss. "That was my sister, just come out of Brian McCredie's bail hearing."

"I'm guessing he made bail," Sorenson said casually, pulling out onto the street.

Danny nodded. "Yeah. He's out. And tonight, we're gonna catch his brother."

_**8:35pm**_

As twilight melted into the summer evening, Danny and Detective Sorenson sat in their car outside Fitzgerald's Pub, clutching their Starbucks coffees and waiting for the signal that Freddie McCredie had finished his shift. They had five back up cars stationed around the pub in including Joe and Renzulli.

Danny kept his eyes glued to the pub, waiting for the undercover cop to come out and give them their signal. Any minute now.

"Easy there Reagan, you're gonna burn a hole in the glass," Sorenson murmured.

"Sorry boss, just waiting for our guy." Danny said in agitation. "He's got a lot to answer for this one. A lot."

Detective Sorenson hesitated for a moment before saying with the utmost fortitude, "Reagan you know I think you're a good detective. You're quick, sharp minded, always on the game… but when we get the signal… you know we shouldn't just run into this headlong."

"I know that sir and I respect that. But this guy we're arresting tonight, he was the one who helped the psycho who murdered my brother's friend. I'm not just doing this for my brother but for Jared Henderson as well." Danny said with sincerity. "We owe it to his memory and his family."

"The kid who died? He was a friend of your family right?"

"Our neighbour." Danny corrected, "But yeah, we've known him and his family for years, almost as long as Jamie. Jared was a good kid, I've watched him grow up with my brother. I feel so angry when I think about what Bachman did."

"Well, from what you told me, it seems like Jared wasn't even a part of Operation Annihilation, he was just talking back." Sorenson said thinly.

Danny let out a bittersweet laugh, "Yeah! That's him. He never did know when to keep his mouth shut. In the end, it was his backchat that got him killed." They sat and observed the pub in silence for a few seconds before Danny said in a tight voice, "One of the things that scare me the most is, that could've been Jamie. Out of the three of them – my brother seems like the one who would've talked back to Bachman, stood up for himself and his friends."

"But he didn't, and that's what saved his life," Sorenson said with reassurance, "It was a smart move on your kid brother's part."

"Yeah and look at the price he's had to pay for it," Danny replied grimly. "Look where he is now. A friggin psych hospital!"

"Better than the alternative," Sorenson said softly.

Danny nodded, his throat hoarse, "I know that. But he doesn't. In reality it's killing him emotionally cause he's beating himself up over it. Wishing he could trade places with Jared. And I am so grateful that he kept quiet and that he's alive. I watched Jared's brother Jake at his funeral, he's only a couple of years older than him. He was walking around like a zombie, lost because he's lost his little brother forever and I came so close to knowing what that was like."

They continued to watch the pub while Danny surreptitiously wiped a tiny tear from the corner of his eye. "It's smoky in here huh?" he joked.

Detective Sorenson laughed, "You don't have to pretend with me Reagan, I've seen it all."

Danny was just about to answer when the pub door opened quickly and the undercover cop stepped out. Sorenson and Danny straightened up, laid their drinks aside and cocked their guns, ready. The cop tipped his hat towards them, giving them the signal that McCredie was on his way out.

They waited. The door stayed shut and not an inkling of movement was to be seen.

"Come on, come on, come on," Danny whispered menacingly, stroking his gun gently with his thumb, his eyes on the pub door.

The door opened and the man whom Danny recognized from the Nintendo store, Freddie McCredie stepped out.

"Okay, on three," Sorenson said with determination. Freddie took out a cigarette and lit it.

"One."

Danny caressed the door handle, ready to push it open.

"Two,"

Danny gripped the door handle tightly.

"Three!"

Danny lifted the handle, thrust the door open, swiftly exited the car, and started striding towards Freddie who's face was hidden behind a cloud of smoke.

"Freddie McCredie?" Danny said cautiously, edging closer to him.

Freddie took one look at Danny and Sorenson, dropped his cigarette and took off running in the opposite direction.

"Hey!" Danny instinctively took off after him screaming, "I got him boss!" He didn't even wait for a reply, he just sprinted off after McCredie, his eyes focused on the grey hood tearing off down the street.

Freddie galloped through the roads amongst the mass of traffic, angry cars and cabs screeched to a halt to let him pass. Danny took advantage of this opportunity and leaped over the stationary cars, trying to keep Freddie in his sight and at the same time avoid getting himself killed or injured in the process.

Freddie barged through a group of kids. "Hey watch it!" One of girls yelled angrily.

Two seconds later Danny surged past them, "Out of my way!" He snarled, knocking the hot dogs out of their hands.

"Oi you're gonna pay for that!" One of the boys shouted.

"Kiss my ass!" Danny hollered back, racing after Freddie who was running down the street, all the while throwing frantic glances over his shoulder at Danny who was chasing him headlong.

Freddie started to slow down, ducking into an alleyway and leaning against the wall to catch his breath. Danny, seizing this opportunity, put on a spurt of energy and dashed straight for the alleyway. Freddie saw Danny charging right at him, prompting him to carry on running.

"Damn it!" Danny growled as he chased McCredie through the alleyway. Freddie tripped and grabbed onto a staircase for support, Danny hurtled closer, a look of intense determination and rage etched upon his face. Freddie scrambled up the fire escape, getting closer to the top. Danny raced up the fire escape taking three steps at a time, Freddie just made it to the top when Danny jumped on him and slammed him against the staircase.

Freddie let out a cry of pain as Danny's large frame collided with his and buckled him to the ground, his head hitting the top step. Danny sat on top of him and twisted his hands behind his back. He turned around to appeal for help and saw to his immense relief, Joe and Renzulli sprinting up the stairs.

"Someone, get over here and cuff this son-of a bitch!" Danny gasped. Joe took over from his brother and tried to restrain Freddie who had a thick ribbon of blood flowing freely from the side of his head. Danny stumbled back and clutched onto the railings for support. Detective Sorenson jogged up the stairs to his charge.

"Hey, Reagan! Are you okay, are you hurt?" he asked in concern.

"No boss I'm fine," Danny panted. "I chased him all the way down the street, over traffic, through a bunch of kids, down and alley and up a fire escape… I think I deserve a drink!"

Detective Sorenson laughed, "After what you just did, you deserve two – On me!"

Joe roughly pulled Freddie to his feet and marched him down the stairs with Danny, Renzulli and Sorenson following close behind.

_**9:16pm**_

Danny watched Freddie sitting stoically in the interrogation room, through observation.

Sorenson sauntered up to him, peering at Freddie through the window. "How long has he been like that?"

"Since we got here." Danny picked up Freddie's file and flipped through it, "Do you want me to take him?"

Sorenson nodded, "You should probably take a tape recorder in with you just in case he says something that could prove useful in court."

"But what if he doesn't say it with the recorder present?"

Sorenson grinned, "Use your initiative Reagan." He attached a tiny tape microphone into Danny's pocket. "The FBI isn't the only one with fancy equipment. Now go get him!"

Danny didn't need to be told twice. As soon as he was given the order, he headed straight into the interrogation room, shutting the door firmly behind him so it was just him and Freddie.

Freddie glanced at Danny as he sat down opposite him but he didn't say anything. Instead he just smirked.

"Something funny?" Danny asked sharply, flexing his fingers under the table while they were wishing to wrap themselves around McCredie's throat.

Freddie just shrugged, "I don't know Detective, you brought me in here. You gonna tell me what this is all about."

Danny narrowed his eyes, "I'm sure you know exactly what this is all about – Freddie. You and your best friend, I believe he goes by the name of Steve Bachman."

Freddie raised one eyebrow in mild surprise, "Oh. So you know who I am. Well, tell me – Detective – how is it you know so much about me when I know jack shit about you?"

"You wanna drop the jackass attitude McCredie!" Danny said angrily, "You're looking at accessory to murder!"

Freddie snorted, "Murder? I've never murdered anyone."

"Hence the word 'accessory,'" Danny muttered in irritation, "Let's just cut straight to the chase cause I'm done playing games, I wanna hear about your pal Steve Bachman and I wanna hear about him right now."

"Why?" Freddie asked lazily, "I haven't seen him since high school."

Danny laughed, "Now I know you know that's a lie!"

Freddie's nose twitched but he kept his composure.

"So," Danny continued, "Tell us about Operation Annihilation."

Freddie's look of carelessness suddenly vanished to be replaced by a look of cold hatred. "I don't have a clue what you're talking about!"

It was Danny's turn to raise his brow, "You seem upset Freddie. Do you wanna talk about it?"

"To a cop? Not a chance!" Freddie spat.

"Well from where I'm sitting it doesn't really look like you have much chances left!" Danny counteracted. "Now, do the decent thing and tell us what we need to know. Then we can figure something out."

"What is this?" Freddie scoffed, "I scratch your back you scratch mine?"

"Not quite," Danny replied coolly, "More of a… you tell us where Steve Bachman is and we won't send you away for twenty years without the possibility of parole."

Freddie shifted in his seat, "Twenty years huh?"

Danny nodded, "Don't forget the -without a possibility of parole." He leaned closer, dropping his voice to mere whisper. "And from what I heard. Prison ain't no picnic for a guy like you. Imagine the jocks in high school… but even worse. And you'll have to relive your high school days over and over again without the luxury of drugs and alcohol to numb the pain. Without your pal Bachman to stick up for you – I give it twenty days before you're hanging from the ceiling."

Freddie recoiled in embarrassment, "Well maybe you shouldn't believe everything you hear!" He murmured, his voice wavering on thin anger.

"Oh I dunno," Danny leant back casually, "It all seems pretty clear to me. Two friends, one's more dominant over the other, the other's too weak to stand on his own two feet. What else did he do for you? Tie your shoes? Wipe your nose?"

"You don't know anything about me and Steve!" Freddie stated aggressively, "And if you know what's good for you, you'll shut up right now!"

Danny just nodded, unfazed by the threats. "And if you know what's good for you, you'll start talking right now!" Danny raised his voice, "Tell us where Bachman is!"

Freddie crossed his arms over his chest, "Lawyer," he said smugly.

Danny was seconds away from decking the guy in the face. He was spared by his boss knocking on the door and entering.

"Reagan," Sorenson eyed Freddie with dislike before turning to Danny, "I need you to step out for a minute."

Danny slowly rose to his feet. "Wait right here," He ordered McCredie.

"Not very many places I can go while I'm handcuffed to a chair Detective," Freddie answered with a conceited grin.

Danny turned towards him, his hand curling into fists. Before he did something he regretted, he seized the door open and left.

"Please give me some good news," Danny begged Sorenson, leaning against the wall.

"I'm afraid not Reagan," Sorenson said with disappointment. "Brian McCredie was found dead outside his house twenty minutes ago."

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><p>To Be Continued...<p> 


	14. Chapter 14  One to Go

**Author's Note: **Well I finally saw the S2 first ep via internet cuz I can't wait for it to show in UK! And I thought it was great and the promo for next week looks even better! But back to the story, this chapter is kinda short cuz I wanted to split it into two so this is the other half - but plz review anyway. Thanks!

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><p><strong>Chapter 14 - One to Go<strong>

**_9:55pm_**

"Dead!" Danny exclaimed in disbelief, "He can't be!"

"I hate to be the bearer of bad news, Reagan but he was found outside his house with a bullet in his chest and was pronounced dead on arrival. There goes our character witness."

"Bachman!" Danny rumbled. "He's caught up with Brian first. Silenced him for good."

"Your sister showed up a few seconds ago, she's waiting for you in there," Sorenson jerked his head towards the entrance.

Danny went to find Erin, she was sitting in his chair, twirling a strand of hair nervously around her finger. She stood up when she saw him, "Danny…" She hugged him.

"I'm guessing you heard the good news," Danny muttered, perching on his desk.

"I came as soon as I heard, Dad told me." She sat back down and surveyed her brother, "So you have no idea where Bachman is at all?"

"If I did, do you think I would be sitting here talking to you?" Danny answered impatiently.

"I'm just asking," Erin said in a clipped voice. "Any leads?"

"Nope. We checked his rented apartment but everything's been cleaned out… landlord said they didn't even pay the rent…" Danny sighed and rubbed his tired face, "I'm sorry… it's just been such a long day."

"You should go home and get some sleep Danny!" Erin chided, "You're in no fit condition to work tonight."

"Thank you, who are you my doctor now?" Danny murmured sardonically.

Erin glared at him, "I'm just concerned!" She fidgeted with her hands, "Also…Dad said that Jamie's coming home on Friday."

"What?" Danny recoiled in excitement, "He's coming home this Friday?"

"That's what Dad said, yeah. The doctors think he's ready for recovery."

"What are we gonna tell him?" Danny asked, his excitement turning quickly to worry.

Erin shrugged, "We can figure that out later. He's suffering from severe depression, this is the last thing he needs to hear!"

"I know, I know," Danny said impatiently, "I'm just not too keen on the idea of coddling him and then not telling him why, God he'll hate that, especially after coming out of that place." Danny shuddered.

"Well you have to!" Erin snapped, "It's for his own good -Bachman's still out there Danny!"

"Oh is he?" Danny retorted sarcastically, "Thanks for pointing it out sis, cause up until now I had no idea!"

Erin stood up in a huff and left. Danny watched her leave, wondering if he should call her back but then changed his mind and walked back into observation instead.

"Listen Reagan… I think you should tell Freddie that his brother's been murdered. It could shed some positive light," Sorenson said hopefully.

"Great," Danny muttered, "Some night this is turning out to be." He walked back into the interrogation room.

Freddie looked up expectantly at him as he entered.

"Bad news Freddie. Your brother was found dead about twenty minutes ago." Danny said casually.

All the colour drained from Freddie's face. Whatever it was, he was not expecting that. "W –what? Brian? Brian's dead?"

"Yeah," Danny sat down, "I'm thinking it was your best friend Bachman. Nice work Freddie," Danny straightened his tie, "You've got your own brother killed."

"No, no, no," Freddie shook his head, "I don't believe you!"

"Until we get ballistics back, we're gonna prove that the bullet which killed your brother is similar to the ones which was used at the Kings Plaza Mall shooting." Danny said, ignoring Freddie.

"No way, no way, no way! Steve loved Brian like a brother, he would never do that!" Freddie protested, slamming his fist on the table, his face twisted in rage.

"Wake up Freddie!" Danny barked, "Steve Bachman never loved anyone! He didn't even have a soul! He didn't give a shit about Brian and he definitely doesn't give a shit about you!"

"You're wrong!" Freddie yelled desperately, "He- he promised we were in this together!"

Danny shook his head sympathetically, "He lied to you Freddie. He's gonna walk all over you, just as he always has done. Now you need to get your story straight."

"I don't believe it." Freddie said in denial, "Why the hell would he kill my brother? He knows how much Brian means to me."

"Your brother? Freddie your brother was working with us!" Danny replied sketchily.

"Huh?" Freddie shook his head again. "Working with you…huh?"

"Yeah, how else do you think we knew about Operation Annihilation? He got released on bail this morning. And my guess is that your buddy Bachman found out he'd been with the cops and thought he'd turned. So he whacked him."

Freddie hung his head and sniffed. "I –I had no idea…. Brian."

Danny leaned towards Freddie and dropped his voice to a hush, "And I dread to think what he's gonna do when he finds out you've been arrested."

Brian's head snapped up. "He wouldn't do anything to me!"

Danny shook his head, "I'm not so sure Freddie. Deep down you know what he's capable of. I know you do. I can see it in your eyes."

Freddie just continued to gaze at Danny, caught in a web of indecision at what to do.

"It's okay," Danny continued, "I understand that he's your friend, I do. But you have a decision to make. Now I know you must've cared for your brother -"

"Cared for him? Cared for him? I loved him!" Freddie raged.

"I know." Danny said softly. "But let me let you in on something. I have a brother too. Two actually. And one of them was in the Nintendo store with his friends on that day. In fact – I think Bachman and them actually got themselves acquainted – you know, when he threatened them to keep their mouths shut and then shot one of them when he disobeyed."

Freddie frowned, "Your brother was one of those three guys?"

Danny nodded very slowly, his eyes never leaving Freddie's face. Freddie's look of horror at being held in the gaze of the brother of one of Steve's victims suddenly merged into a look of recognition. Danny shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He knew Freddie recognized him.

"Oh…yeah," Freddie said haughtily. "I think I remember you… you came into the store about nine months ago – you thought that the – the graphics of Zombitetown were too basic –I begged to differ…"

"Good memory," Danny said blandly, "Let's see if we can put that to use, what's Operation Annihilation?"

"You said you wanted it for your brother," Freddie continued, ignoring Danny. "You said you wanted the best for him because he was turning sixteen. You kept arguing that those graphics weren't good enough. I told you, you didn't know what you were talking about but you wouldn't let up."

"I guess we do have more than one thing in common Freddie. We both want to look after our little brothers."

"Want-ed," Freddie said with a glazed look, "Past tense."

"Yeah." Danny said quietly, "But you know how it feels like. To… watch someone grow up. To help them as much as possible, through school, life.

Freddie wiped his eyes with his sleeve. "I've always tried to do right by him," he sniffed, "But I thought that it didn't matter – we had each other but Steve had no one. He promised me it was going to be okay, that we were doing it for underprivileged people like us."

"Doing what Freddie?" Danny asked inquisitively, "Killing innocent people."

"He told me they weren't innocent!" Freddie shouted, his eyes brimming with tears. "They took everything from us!"

"They were just shopping Freddie!" Danny retorted in disgust. "You might not have shot them personally but you still helped him get away with it."

"Yeah I did." Freddie said broadly, "But I'm not gonna apologize for it." He dropped his voice to a hush and leaned closer to Danny, "Do you have any idea what it's like to grow up with nothing? To have parents that don't give a shit whether you live or die? To go to school where your way and means of living are used as a punch line for every joke?" He leaned back in his chair, satisfied by Danny's obvious discomfort. "Didn't think so."

"You know anybody with a shred of a brain. Anybody who knew what was going to happen to him , would find a decent way of co-operating with us. But you? You just can't stop putting your foot in it can you?" Danny said to Freddie in repulsion.

Freddie just continued to stare blankly at Danny.

"I wanna tell you something…" Danny continued.

"Oh yeah," Freddie raised his eyebrows, "Are you gonna give me the pity speech?"

Danny shook his head, "No. Actually I'm not. Believe it or not there are other people just like you out there! True, some of them don't make it far. But some of them actually do. They allow it to make themselves better."

Freddie continued to just stare at Danny but his eyes held something that looked a lot like regret.

"You made some bad choices Freddie. Befriending Bachman and trusting him was one of them. And now your brother's dead." Danny stood up and was about to leave when he paused, his hand on the doorknob, and he turned to Freddie and said softly, "But I guess you got your whole life to think about that now. In the can."

Danny left the room and shut the door behind him, leaving Freddie McCredie alone to dwell in his own self-pity.

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><p>To Be Continued...<p> 


	15. Chapter 15  Welcome Home Jamie

**Author's Note: **Thanks once again for reviewing! I've just started Uni so I'm working through this story before the work load really piles up! Anyway, this chapter pretty much deals with Jamie's adjustment so read and please review!

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><p><strong>Chapter 15– Welcome Home Jamie<strong>

_**June 30th 2000**_

"What time are you picking Jamie up Dad?" Danny asked his father at the breakfast table.

Frank glanced at his watch, "I should be leaving now." He tucked his newspaper neatly under his arm and picked up his jacket. Mary bustled in, her arms laden with various vegetables.

"Ma…" Danny eyed the stuff in her arms, "Ma don't you think you're going a bit overboard with this whole dinner thing."

"No of course not!" She said looking scandalised, "It's not every day one of our own comes home." She seized a potato peeler and started shaving the potatoes. "We have to make it special."

"Yeah but Ma… he's coming back from a mental hospital. He might want to just forget about it." Joe added warily.

"This is just the kind of thing he needs," Mary said with reassurance. "He needs his family to know how supportive we all are."

Erin entered through the back door, carrying a squealing Nikki in her arms. "Hey everybody!" she greeted, kissing her mother's cheek and letting her daughter run loose.

"Oh good you're here! You can help with the cooking!" Mary said sounding relieved.

"Because we've been so useless!" Danny announced in a pretend huff. Erin laughed.

"Before I forget, Linda's visiting her parents this Fourth of July and she basically ordered me to stay here and spend some time with Jamie… so is it okay if I stay here for a couple of days?"

"No problem, I'll sort your old room out and Joe's still staying here. Although I admit it'll be mayhem to have all you boys here again! Then again, it's just the kind of family environment Jamie needs to ease him back into normal life!" Mary said happily.

"Yeah that's exactly what Linda said. And I know I should feel kind of bad for leaving my pregnant wife but it didn't take much persuasion. I want to spend some time with my brothers, real quality time and be a part of helping Jamie." Danny said softly. "Bright side – I get to drink as much as I like on that day!"

"So she won't be there for the Schneider's barbecue?"

"Fraid not Ma, looks like you're stuck with just me."

"Oh joy."

"Look, I really don't mean to spoil the atmosphere, but we should probably decide what we're going to tell Jamie about Brian McCredie." Erin said tentatively.

"Let's not talk about it at all tonight," Mary said decisively, "It'll only just drag up bad memories for him." She slammed a saucepan on the counter, "And besides, he's still fragile right now, he might not be able to take it. Let's just leave it for now."

"Well… yeah, okay," Frank mumbled, clearly unsure of what to do, "But only because it's his homecoming."

"He needs to know sometime!" Danny pointed out.

"Yeah we'll see how things go today Danny," Frank said, ending the conversation with a long sip of coffee.

But Danny lowered his voice and said in a tough voice, "In case you all haven't forgotten, it was turning a blind eye that put him in there in the first place." And with those words he ducked out of the kitchen, glad to get out.

_**12:25pm**_

Jamie sat in his usual position on Dr Rimmer's couch, his legs tucked underneath him.

"So," Dr Rimmer reclined comfortably in his own chair and faced his patient, "On a scale of one to ten, how are you feeling today?"

Jamie shrugged, "I dunno… a…five, six maybe, I dunno."

Dr Rimmer blinked. "A five or six? You're going home today, you're gonna see your family, your friends again."

"I know," Jamie said quietly, "And that's what I'm afraid of. Going back out there…"

Dr Rimmer surveyed him closely, "Jamie, is there something else out there that you're worried about?"

Jamie sighed heavily and shifted in his seat. "Look… just so we're clear – everything I've told you is going to stay between us right?"

"Everything is strictly confidential," Dr Rimmer said firmly, "You don't have to worry. What you say in here, stays in here."

Jamie nodded slowly. "So… my brothers have been filling me in on stuff they found out about the Sniper or…Steve Bachman."

"And how do you feel about that?" Dr Rimmer asked tenderly.

Jamie swallowed. "I – I don't know. It's like when he was a Sniper… he was this monster who murdered all these people, including my friend. But now – he has a name, and a history. He's more of a person."

"He always was a person. But now he's a person in your eyes too."

"Yeah. And when Danny was telling me about his past – I felt bad for him." Jamie's voice shook, "I couldn't help but think that, okay, so maybe it wasn't his fault, he's had a rough life. It's almost like I'm on the tip of forgiving him. But then I remember that he's killed my friend as well as all these other people and I'm thinking – who the hell am I to feel sorry for a guy like that? He doesn't deserve to be forgiven or to have any sympathy - Am I a bad person for doing that?"

"No you're not." Dr Rimmer said in assurance, "Forgiveness is something that isn't supposed to be deserved Jamie, it's born out of compassion. You are a very compassionate person, regardless of what happened. You feel emotions that some people just can't bring themselves to feel."

"Great," Jamie muttered, "So we can rule out borderline personality disorder."

"And in time, maybe you might find it your heart to put this to rest and move on with your life once and for all."

"But I don't want to ever forgive him!" Jamie spat, "I just want this over with! I want him gone! For good, I want him – out of here!" He rubbed his head. "He's living in here. I feel violated; he forced me to do stuff, to cover for him. And I just want him gone, is that too much to ask?"

"What about the nightmares? Are you still having them?"

Jamie tried not to let the truth show on his face, "I - uh, it's becoming hazy. It's not as bad as it was before."

"That's good, I'm really glad to hear that. You've made some good progress. The depression, with the right medication, can be cured."

"How are all these pills supposed to work?" Jamie asked out of curiosity.

"Well, when you feel depressed, your brain has a reduction in producing a chemical called serotonin," Dr Rimmer explained, "The anti-depressants, they help bring the serotonin levels back to normal."

"Got it."

"But that's not to say it's a silver bullet for severe depression," Dr Rimmer said warningly, "Exercise and therapy is also a good, more healthier method. But don't tell the drug reps that or else I'll be out of a job!" He winked.

Jamie laughed softly. "So, is this it?"

"Don't forget to call and make an appointment, we still need to monitor your behaviour." He checked his watch. "Other than that… our time's up. You are free to go."

Jamie couldn't get out of that building fast enough. He raced down the steps, with his bag slung loosely over his shoulder and ran right into his father's waiting arms.

"Jamie." Frank embraced his son tightly, glad to have him in his arms at last.

"Hi Dad," Jamie murmured, savouring the comfort of someone familiar.

"Are you sure you're ready to come back home?" Frank asked his son in concern.

Jamie turned back to Corbel and surveyed the place which had held him prisoner for the past few weeks. His eyes wandered to his old room, the room which he had spent night after night, worrying himself to sleep. Jamie turned back to his father and smiled.

"I've never been more sure. Let's go home." Frank grinned, took his son's bag and guided him towards the car, muttering about the big family dinner. Jamie was only half-listening to him as he slid into the passenger seat of his father's car, with a small twinge in his stomach.

Even though Jamie was unbelievably happy that he was free from Corbel, it didn't stop the fact that there was a murderer on the loose. Now, Jamie was returning back to his old neighbourhood, to his own house where he was sure The Sniper was stalking him.

"You're awfully quiet," Frank commented on his son's silent behaviour.

"Oh," Jamie forced a smile, "I'm just thinking." He turned away from his father, the smile slipping off his face like a mask.

They drove the rest of the journey in silence with Jamie still staring out the window. Jamie wasn't even paying attention until he saw the large For Sale sign staked right outside Jared's house. As his father drove right past it, Jamie craned his neck back, to check it was really there and not some figment of his imagination.

"What's the matter?" Frank asked, noticing Jamie gawping out the window.

"Why is there a for sale sign outside Jared's house?" Jamie demanded.

"I guess, the Henderson's have decided to move on," Frank said in a tight voice, pulling into their driveway.

"So they're selling their house?"

"It's their way of letting go. I suppose there'll be too many memories in that house, this neighbourhood." Frank said quietly, switching off the engine. "I know I'd want to do the same thing."

Someone new would be moving into Jared's house. How would he feel about that?

"But… surely –living with those memories is what keeps his own memory alive." Jamie argued.

Frank shrugged, "Some people don't see things the way you do son." He turned to his son with a small smile, "So here we are. Home sweet home."

"Yeah, home." Jamie murmured nervously, gazing out of the window at the house he grew up in, he saw his bike leaning against the garage just as he'd left it.

"Look, before we go in, I think there's something you should know." Frank started gravely, "Your mother won't like it that I've told you but I think you have a right to know. We've arrested Freddie McCredie."

Frank now had his son's full attention. "Freddie?"

"Yeah."

"But you've already arrested Brian?"

Frank hesitated, "Yes. Brian was arrested." He answered carefully.

"Hold on!" Jamie was slowly starting to panic again, "What about the media? Won't they find out? It's gonna leak. You'll get into trouble!"

"The Commissioner and Mayor already know all about it," Frank said with reassurance.

"You – you told them? How did they take it?" Jamie fidgeted nervously with the sleeve of his sweatshirt.

"You've known Commissioner Lewis long before he became the Commissioner, you grew up with his kids remember? He's on your side." Frank said calmly.

"And the Mayor?"

"Oh." Frank paused. "He was less understanding but he'll come round."

Jamie sat in silence trying to absorb all of this in.

"Look, the police want to talk to you about the truth Jamie and they're gonna want you to make a formal statement. And Dean as well."

"You should've asked me first," Jamie huffed.

"I know. You don't have to talk to them if you don't want to Jamie," Frank said tenderly. "I know this is a lot to take in right now."

"No it's okay Dad," Jamie sighed, "I'll talk to them. Anything to get Bachman put behind bars for the rest of his life, I'll do it."

Frank smiled and clapped his son on the shoulder, "That's my boy."

"But not yet though!" Jamie said hurriedly. "Just… give me time to think about what I'm gonna say."

Frank nodded in understanding. "Sure son. Ready to go in?"

Jamie took a deep breath, "As I'll ever be."

He didn't want to go inside. Even though he had been dying to see everybody and was counting the days until he could escape the hell hole, he suddenly felt like he couldn't face anyone. Everything was going to be awkward and weird. Jamie just didn't know if he could handle it just yet.

So as soon as they set foot inside the house, Jamie took his bag from his father and his box of stuff and trooped straight to his room, shutting the door firmly behind him. A small grin spread across his face as he revelled in being back in his old surroundings. He didn't waste any time, he stuck his posters back up and put everything back in its own place. After he finished unpacking, he gazed around the room, contemplating how familiar it seemed, yet it felt so strange after being away for what felt like an eternity.

Jamie ran his hand along his own bed, thinking about Corbel. He knew it was stupid as it was his own bed which he'd grown up in yet he still checked the sides for restraints. When he was just about to pull back the covers, he heard a slight shuffle outside. Frowning, he wandered into the landing and almost walked straight into his mother who has just turned the corner, a teacup and saucer in her hand.

Mary jumped in surprise and almost dropped the teacup. "Oh, Jamie it's you!"

"Sorry! I -"

"No, no don't worry about it. I guess I was just used to having a quiet house while you were gone." Jamie nodded slowly. "But it's no problem!" Mary said hastily, "Are – are you okay?"

"Yeah," Jamie answered quietly, "Never better." He turned away from his mother and headed straight back into his room and made a beeline for his bed, sinking back onto the pillows.

Mary padded over to her son and rested the cup of tea on his bedside table. "It's camomile." She said softly. "It's great for headaches, trust me. I couldn't get enough of it these past few weeks. I must've had ten cups a day!"

Jamie continued to stare out of the window directly opposite his bed. He resisted the strong urge to say, 'well at least I'm not driving you to alcohol.' Mary sat down carefully on the foot of Jamie's bed, watching him closely.

"The house has been so quiet without you here," Mary said, forcing a laugh. "It'll be… good to get back to normal won't it? Enjoying the summer and making the most of it before school starts? I suppose you won't have much catching up to do, you didn't miss much only a week. It's a good school, they were very understanding when I explained the circumstances to them. A nurturing environment is just what you need when you get back."

Jamie didn't say anything. He had been taught how to control his inner anger. He was a lot better at controlling it, unlike Danny. He wasn't like Danny, he wasn't belligerent or aggressive, but calm and composed.

"I spoke to Mrs D'Luca the other day. I heard Zoe and Josh wrote to you while you were in Corbel?"

Jamie nodded automatically.

"That's so sweet of them. It's so nice to see you're all still close. You know, you three have been inseparable since kindergarten!" Mary gave a faint laugh. Jamie just continued to nod like a puppet.

"I just can't believe you're going to be a junior this year. You'll be in college soon and then before you know it law school!"

Jamie closed his eyes and took a deep breath. His heart involuntarily pinched as he picked up on the stress his mother made of the word 'law school.'

Mary shifted further towards her son. "Jamie, sweetheart I know you may feel like you've lost your way and you might need space while you find your way back. But I think that we can all make it work here."

"Huh?" Jamie finally managed to choke.

"I feel positive about your recovery." Mary explained simply, "You're gonna be fine."

"If you say so," Jamie replied in a bland voice.

Mary continued to watch her son warily. She placed a comforting hand over his trembling one. "You're a good boy Jamie, you just fell in with the wrong crowd but all that's over now."

"And by wrong crowd you mean Dean, right?"

"Well…"

"Ma, he didn't force me to go to the Nintendo store, it was a group decision!" Jamie snapped, "Nobody dragged me, I walked! You can't just make up excuses for why I was there, Dr Rimmer said -"

"Okay, okay, okay!" Mary tried to rub his hand comfortingly, "Look, please come downstairs!" she begged. "The family have been waiting to see you. We've all really missed you."

Jamie ignored her and surreptitiously slipped his hand out from under hers. His fingers brushing over Fudge's fur, "I don't want to come down. I just can't face everyone."

Mary tried to take his hand but he held on tightly to Fudge so she rubbed his arm soothingly. "What that monster did to Jared is horrific. Watching someone grow up with your son, seeing them every day, to have them killed like that... it's sickening. Then I think of Mrs Henderson and I'm in tears. No mother should ever have to go through losing a son so violently like that and I just pray to God I'm dead before I see it happen to my family. But it's being taken care of. He can't hurt you anymore."

"Please don't make promises if you can't keep them Ma!" Jamie jerked his arm away, "I'm sick of all the lies!"

"What lies? What are you talking about?" Mary demanded, desperately trying to get through to her son. "Look, just come downstairs and see everyone okay?"

"You want me – to celebrate and smile." Jamie threw an angry look towards his mother who recoiled. "Why would I want to do that? I have nothing to celebrate!" Jamie turned his back on her, clutched Fudge closer to his chest and shut his eyes.

"Jamie…" Mary tried to break in on his thoughts. "I'm sorry. I should've known this would've been too soon for you. I just wanted to you to feel our love and support. I should've realised that you need more time." She patted her son's knee. "But if you ever wanna talk, about anything at all, you know I'm still here and I'm not going anywhere. I've always told you kids that. Even when I'm… well, dead and gone. I'm still your mother and no further than a prayer away. There's nothing you can't tell me."

Jamie listened to her words carefully, feeling the hot tears drip off his nose, onto Fudge's fur. Then he felt her get up from his bed and walk quickly towards the door.

"Ma," he called out softly.

"Yes?"

He couldn't bring himself to do it. "Nothing, forget it." Jamie closed his eyes, buried his face in Fudge's fur and waited for his mother to leave.

_**7:15pm**_

Danny breezed in through the back door, whistling cheerfully, his grandparents close at his heels. "Ma we're here!"

"Hey Danny, Ma, Pop!" Frank greeted, balancing the salad in one hand. "Pop can I tempt you with a glass of scotch?"

"Is the Pope Catholic?" Henry laughed, following his son into the dining room. "Hell make it two!" Betty rolled her eyes at her husband and headed straight for the kitchen. On her way she passed Erin carrying the bread out.

"Hey Grandma!" She kissed her grandmother.

"Where's Chip?" Danny asked his sister with a mocking smile.

She just raised her eyebrow compassionately, her smile fading slightly, "Oh, he's in his room. He's been there all day and…he won't come down."

"What?" Danny frowned. Erin just shrugged and proceeded to carry the bread into the dining room.

Danny glanced at the stairs, wondering what was going through Jamie's head now. Still unable to shake the feeling he wandered into the living room where he stumbled upon Erin and her husband in mid-row.

"Maybe I should go and check on him I mean -he could be passed out again," Erin fretted to her husband who was casually tossing back a beer.

"Maybe he just needs some time alone," Johnny said dismissively.

"Oh yeah? He's had practically a month to be alone!" Erin snapped.

Johnny drained his beer, "So what do you want me to do about it then?"

"I'm just asking for some support!" Erin replied in disgust. "What could he be doing alone in his room - he's just come out..."

"It's almost as if you've got him confused with a sixteen year old boy." Johnny sneered. "Oh wait? He is one!"

Johnny hoisted himself out of the squashy armchair and went in search for another beer, leaving his wife alone on the couch, her head cradled in her hands.

Danny passed Johnny in the doorway and glared at him which he returned only too well. Then he crept over to his sister and placed a hand on her shoulder. She looked up in mild-surprise and let out a stiff laugh. "Hey. I thought you were… never mind."

"I don't get it," Danny said in a rigid voice. "I can understand if it was me up there, but Jamie and Johnny always got on so well."

"Oh it's not Jamie, it's just me." Erin sighed, "I'm worrying over nothing."

"Still, you have to. He's our baby brother isn't he? Maybe Jamie doesn't mean as much to Johnny as he does to you."

"But Linda's not like that is she." Erin said, unable to keep the bitterness out of her voice, "She loves Jamie like a brother. She made the effort to visit at least once. Why does my spouse have to be the one to be so difficult and make things so hard with us?"

Danny gave her a wry smile, "Yeah, I don't know if you remember, but Jamie was the first one to immediately warm up to Linda. And Linda doesn't have any brothers of her own so, she was quite charmed by Jamie."

Erin grinned, "Is it really true, that on the first day you introduced Jamie to Linda, he was gonna ride on the Detonator and he asked you both to hold his hand?"

Danny laughed loudly at the memory, "Yeah, we took him to that theme park and he rode on all the roller coasters without a problem, come Detonator, he waited until we were all strapped in until he asked if he could hold our hands. We still have that picture on our fridge! He's screaming and clutching onto our hands! I taunted him for years about it!"

"He was like what, thirteen?"

Danny nodded, still laughing, "Yep, that's our Jamie. Warms up to everyone."

Erin's smile slowly began to fade. "I hate to think that he had to go through what he did," she said quietly. "Our little, baby brother. He was always so happy and now he's so depressed."

Danny immediately clenched his teeth. "Yeah. Well, at least Freddie's been arrested. That's good. That's progress."

"Yeah but Bachman is still out there."

"I know that Erin." Danny said in a tense voice. He needed to change the conversation fast, he couldn't talk about this right now. "So… is Jamie okay."

"I don't know." Erin answered truthfully. "Ma said that he seems weird."

"How weird?"

"Remember when we went to see him for the first time in Corbel?"

Danny nodded.

"That weird."

"Oh…" Danny frowned again. "Okay well maybe I should talk to him."

"Good luck." Erin muttered into her large glass of wine.

Danny traipsed up the stairs to Jamie's room, pausing to glance at old pictures which were hung up along the staircase wall. He reached the landing, Jamie's room door was shut and the bathroom was right next to it, door slightly ajar. Danny just stood, staring at the place where he stood as a child, listening to his parents row and Jamie cry. He took a deep breath and knocked his special knock on the door before entering.

Jamie slowly eased his headphones off. He was reclining in his desk chair, listening to his CD'S the songs bringing fond and hysterical memories of Jamie trying to hold the video camera steady as he filmed Danny and Joe dancing at Danny's wedding. He listened to the songs every day in Corbel, it was one of the only things he had to remind him of the good times.

Danny smirked as he picked up the CD cases. "Wow, here's me trying to forget the memory of dancing to these, in a hurry."

Jamie's lips twitched. "Ninety-nine was a good year. I can't wait to see the end of this one."

"Aah, kid, have you been here all by yourself since you got back?"

Jamie half-nodded, "Ma came by to give me some camomile tea."

Danny snorted, "For the headaches? Ma…"

"She wants me to come downstairs and see everyone." Jamie said in a bland voice.

"Yeah too right! Come on let's go downstairs."

"You go. I'm staying here." Jamie murmured.

"Okay." Danny said after a pause. "I'll stay here with you then." He hopped up onto the desk.

Jamie looked at his brother but didn't say anything. He fiddled with his headphones, awkwardly.

"Please don't shut us out again Jamie," Danny started in a sad voice, "it was hard for us too you know."

"Yeah," Jamie scoffed, "I'm sure it was -"

"It was! Every night I went to bed thinking of you and I woke up thinking of you. I was like, what's he doing now, what's happening to him? I didn't have a minute's peace, not up here!" He jabbed at his head. "I tried to work my other case but I couldn't even do that. So I watch TV, take my mind of it." Danny shook his head. "But I couldn't stop thinking about you in that place with Bachman still on the loose." Danny glowered at Jamie, "We'd sit down for Sunday dinner and I'm thinking, 'this isn't fair, Jamie should be here!' I couldn't even crack a joke without feeling guilty because you weren't there to laugh with us! So yeah, I'm sure it was hard for us!"

Jamie didn't know how to apologize. He didn't mean for it to come out like that but it just did. He knew his family cared but at least they had each other. He didn't have anyone.

"It was worse for Ma and Dad you know," Danny continued quietly. "They had to stay here in this house, all quiet, without you and your teen troubles. We do love you, you know. I know we have a weird and dysfunctional way of showing it but we're a family kid. And we look out for each other. So let's go downstairs and show them how strong we are."

"I can't do it!" Jamie whined.

"Why?" Danny demanded hoarsely. "Are we really that bad to be around?"

"No! It's not you – it's me I – I can't face everyone." Jamie said through clenched teeth. "It's like… every time you all look at me… all you're gonna see is some… manic depressive."

"No we won't! We'll see you, Jamie Reagan." Danny said with kindness. "The little boy we've watched grow up."

Jamie shook his head, his head turned the other way. He knew somewhere, deep down, Danny was right, but that still didn't stop them from fussing around him and treating him differently.

"Look at me kid!" Danny ordered fiercely. Jamie turned his head towards Danny, his eyes glistening. "I know what you're going through, I do. Being a cop… isn't all that it's cracked up to be. I've seen some things that will haunt me for a long, long time."

This conversation sounds familiar, Jamie thought miserably.

"But do you know how I get through it?"

Jamie shook his head and shrugged, half-heartedly.

"The family. They get me through it." Danny said confidently. "When I'm sat around the table every Sunday after a rough week and I listen to your school stories or Erin and Joe's political arguments, I feel so much better. Just knowing that they're always gonna be there to catch me when I fall. Just like we are for you.

"Yeah but I'm scared," Jamie whispered.

"What of?"

"Of so many things – that it'll never be the same between all of us - that the rest of the family will look at me differently. And if they do… then I'd rather just stay here forever. I'd just want to remember it like it was. When we were all happy. Like when you were my annoying big brother!"

"I can still be your annoying big brother!" Danny said desperately.

"No you can't!" Jamie chided, "I know you Danny. You'll feel guilty whenever you tease me about anything from now on."

Danny took on a look of fierce determination. "Do you trust me?"

"Yeah..."

"Then you're just gonna have to trust me when i say that nothing would have changed for good. Everything will go back to normal kid, you'll see." Danny promised.

"I just want everything to go back to the way it was," Jamie's voice wavered, "When we were all happy and together."

"We still are. But one thing's missing."

"What's that?"

"You." Danny said emphatically. "You're not here."

Jamie tried to say something but he couldn't.

"Come on, kid let's go downstairs together." Danny slid off the desk, pulled Jamie off the chair and into a hug. "Remember, I'll be five steps behind you."

They both marched downstairs, Jamie feeling nervous and apprehensive, Danny right behind him with his hand resting on his brother's shoulder.

"Jamie!" Joe hailed happily, meeting them at the bottom of the stairs. "So you finally decided to come down then?"

"Yep, I got bored sitting up there by myself and then when Danny showed up and started talking to me…"

"I see…"

"Hey!" Danny playfully punched Jamie's arm.

"Glad to see you've finally worked things out," Mary said to Jamie airily, as she met them on her way out of the kitchen.

"Yeah so am I," Jamie said, still laughing.

"Good," Erin appeared behind her mother carrying a stack of plates, "You can now help set the table!" she shoved the plates into Danny's hands and quickly fled before he could protest at the same time when Mary shoved some cutlery into Joe's hands.

Jamie hesitated, then followed them into the dining room.

"Aaah! There he is, the fresh prince of New York! Come here!" Henry exclaimed, pulling his grandson into a strong hug.

"How many glasses of scotch has he had," Jamie muttered to Johnny after he was released.

"I lost count after the fourth," Johnny sighed.

"Let me have a go," Linda said warmly embracing her brother-in-law, "It's good to have you back home again kiddo!"

"Thanks," Jamie said with much appreciation, "It's good to be back."

"Aaw, come here," Erin ordered, wrapping her arms around her brother's neck, and hugging him hard.

"Let him breathe Erin!" Joe scolded.

"Never! I'm never gonna let him go again!"

"Let's eat, I'm starving!" Danny announced.

"And I bet you are too, you look like you could do with some feeding up," Linda said to Jamie in concern.

"Yeah," Jamie whispered, "I'm – I'm glad to have Ma's cooking again."

After everyone was settled at the table, Jamie thought that everyone looked happy and relaxed, their eyes were darting towards Jamie's direction but they didn't look nervous or anxious. They were warm and understanding.

"Okay, before we say grace I wanna say a few words," Frank announced.

"Not another speech Dad!" Jamie complained, drawing giggles from everyone at the table.

"No, no I have to!" Frank replied with a grin. "Well… I can't believe it. All my family back together again!"

"Back for good aren't you Jamie!" Joe said with a grin.

"I couldn't believe it when he walked in!" Betty added with excitement.

"Yeah, everyone burst into tears, it was awful," Johnny muttered with sarcasm. Erin and Danny rolled their eyes and glowered at him but he seemed unfazed.

"This family's been through a lot," Frank continued, pointedly ignoring his son-in-law. "But what's past is past. All that matters is that somehow we got through it and we're still here right now, together again. Starting over." He looked directly at his youngest, "Okay?"

Jamie nodded, his throat felt tight. "Yeah."

"I think I'm gonna cry!" Linda sniffed, wiping her tears.

"Here she goes again!" Danny teased.

"It's just hormones, leave her alone!" Erin defended with a laugh.

Danny sniggered, "Tell me about it!"

"Who wants to say grace?" Mary asked, placing a loving hand in her husband's.

"I think we should let Jamie do it tonight Ma," Danny suggested with a wink.

Jamie almost choked on his milk, "What?" He sputtered, "You – you want me to say grace?" He had never said grace at the table before.

"I think he's ready for it," Frank agreed, "Jamie?"

Everyone joined hands and bowed their heads as Jamie said grace. During the course of the entire meal the ice had been smashed and everything just fell back into normality. Pretty soon, Jamie was complaining about high school again, Joe was telling one of his anecdotes involving his partner Renzulli which led to Danny and Erin getting tangled in yet another political squabble. Jamie relaxed and enjoyed the meal, thinking that everything was returning back to the way it should be.

After dinner, when everyone was casually conversing in the dining room, Jamie stood at the sink in the kitchen, just staring out the window, thinking about whether the time was right to tell Danny about the Sniper's identity. He just didn't know if he'd be much help, they already had a name and pulled his profile up, what good would it do if he told them now? Not to mention the fact that it meant he would've lied to the police twice.

Danny entered the kitchen carrying two empty plates and shutting the door with his foot, he said lightly, "Hey kid, you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm just getting a drink of water," Jamie held up his glass.

"Did Johnny bore you again with his opinions of jurisdiction?" Danny asked with a smirk.

Jamie laughed, "No! I just…can't believe I'm home…that's all."

"How does it feel?" Danny asked softly, resting the plates on the counter and watching his brother.

"Well..." Jamie started anxiously, "We never really got a chance to talk about that day at the mall - you know - where I tell you my side of the story and everything."

"No, we haven't done that yet." Danny said edgily.

"And there's so much I have yet to tell you about -"

"No," Danny interrupted with firm kindness, "Not now, you need to rest kid. You're home now, and that's the most important thing. I know there's a lot to sort out regarding Bachman and where we go from here, but all that can wait."

"But Danny -"

"No Jamie!" Danny looked at Jamie straight in the eyes and said very straightforward, "All you have to remember is that you're home and nothing is ever going to hurt you again. I promise you that. Okay?" Danny light-heartedly knocked his fist against Jamie's chin, Jamie smiled faintly. "Okay?" Danny repeated, ruffling his brother's hair and goading him into a small fight just so he could get his arms around him in headlock – and a hug. Just glad that he was here and safe, was all Danny cared about right now.

"Hey! I'm fine, Danny get off!" Jamie chuckled. "I'll be okay!"

Danny reluctantly released his brother just as Frank entered the kitchen. "Is everything all right in here boys?"

"Yeah," Danny smiled at Jamie, "We were just talking, weren't we kid?"

Jamie nodded. "So… what did I miss when I was away?"

It was meant as an innocent question, yet he noticed the subtle look exchanged between his father and brother.

"Hardly anything," Frank said in a chipper voice.

"Nothing that won't wait until tomorrow," Danny added pointedly, giving his father a warning look.

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><p>To Be Continued...<p> 


	16. Chapter 16  Struggling to Cope

**Author's Note: **Well I watched Friendly Fire and I gotta say, even though I enjoyed the episode, I did think it lacked the whole 'brotherly moments thing' which is a shame because the episode would've worked better with it, plus they didn't even have enough of Jamie in it for my liking. Anyway... this chapter involves ALOT of Jamie and his adjustment to being back at home which isn't working too well and he's slowly sprialling out of control. Please review!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 16 – Struggling to Cope<strong>

_**July 1st 2000**_

When Jamie walked down to breakfast the next morning after a rough night's sleep, he didn't fail to notice that all eyes surreptitiously glanced at his every move from the moment he entered the kitchen.

"Morning," Jamie greeted timidly to his father and Joe who were seated at the table. Mary hummed a tune to herself as she set a jug of juice and a plate of cinnamon buns in the centre of the table.

"Good morning honey!" she chirped, "I've got cinnamon buns, just for you! Try one, they're delicious." She offered him a plate.

"Thanks Ma," Jamie said blandly, a little freaked out by his mother's suddenly pleasant behaviour. He accepted the plate and picked up a bun. "They smell good. Did you make them?"

"No, Mrs Vecchio, made them and brought them over this morning! She said Kelli and the others were asking after you." Mary said happily, as though Jamie should also be excited by this news.

Jamie dropped the bun back on his plate, "Oh."

Mary's smile slipped a little, "Honey?"

Jamie shifted uncomfortably, trying not to sound too awkward. "Just out of curiosity…um…how many people know I'm back?"

Mary shrugged casually, "Just your friends."

Jamie nodded and tried not to let the worried look show. He hoped it wouldn't be around the whole neighbourhood that there was a basket case living on the block.

"It's okay!" Mary reassured, reading her son's expression, "They're just concerned about you," she stroked his cheek, "that's a good thing remember?"

"Hey Jamie, did you sleep okay?" Jamie also didn't fail to notice the intense concern in Joe's voice.

"Like a baby," Jamie lied through gritted teeth as he slowly poured himself a glass of orange juice.

"Did you take your sleeping medication last night?" Frank asked curiously.

Jamie hesitated. "Yes Dad," He answered very quickly. "I – I was out like a light wasn't I?"

"And what about your anti-depressants?" Frank pressed.

Jamie took a long gulp of juice and said in a flavourless voice, "Yep that too. It helped a lot. I feel so much better now." Another lie. Those pill bottles were lying at the bottom of his drawer unopened. Whatever those anti-depressants did it wasn't working. He hadn't told Dr Rimmer this for fear of being held back in hospital. The serotonin levels were at an all-time low. He couldn't keep a clear head when he took those pills so he wanted to ease himself off them. They weren't helping.

"Dr Rimmer said you were supposed to take your anti-depressants twice a day, and your sleeping meds right before you go to sleep." Frank reminded him.

Jamie heaved a sigh, "Yeah I know Dad. Dr Rimmer made me do the same thing when I was in that hospital."

The kitchen fell quiet, except for the gentle sizzle of the frying pan as Mary turned over the bacon. Jamie avoided sitting down at the table where his father was pretending to read the paper and Joe was silently munching on his food, deep in thought.

Mary inched closer to him, trying to find random utensils to use but Jamie could feel his mother was just trying to find something to say to him. He didn't talk to her, just continued to pick at a piece of his bun.

"Sweetie…" Mary started, looking up from the pan. "Is there the slightest chance that if I asked you what was wrong, you'd tell me?"

Jamie made eye contact with his mother, continuing to tear away at his bun and not saying anything. Feeling uncomfortable with her son's reaction Mary turned back to the bacon and muttered sarcastically, "Of course not. That'll take all the fun out of guessing and why would I want that?"

Jamie turned back to his unwanted food. Air, he needed some air.

"I'm going outside," Jamie announced, ignoring the looks of surprise from his family's faces.

"I – I don't think that's such a good idea!" Frank said hurriedly, leaping out of his chair.

Jamie rolled his eyes and huffed, "Chill out Dad. I'm literally going to be outside this house!"

"What do you need? One of us can go and get it for you?" Joe offered kindly, also rising from his chair but a bit more subtly.

"I don't need anything!" Jamie fought hard to keep his temper under control, "I just need - I just need some fresh air, is that okay with everybody?"

Jamie marched out of the kitchen, grabbing his jacket off the staircase. "Hold up, one of us will come with you!" he heard his father call from the kitchen.

Jamie sighed in exasperation and continued walking, "I don't want anyone to come with me!"

"But it's for your own good Jamie," Frank caught up with his son and took him by the arm, "Dr Rimmer said you shouldn't be alone -"

"What do you think I'm gonna do? Kill myself?" Jamie retorted cynically, yanking his arm away and storming out of the house. He filed down the steps and kicked one of his mother's flowerpots in a rage, instantly regretting it as his toe started throbbing painfully. "Ow!"he quickly sat down on the step, rubbing his toe through his Converses. Jamie closed his eyes, trying to breathe in the fresh air and focus on happy thoughts, that's what Dr Rimmer had said. It was a nice Summer's day, to anyone but Jamie there was nothing to be upset about.

"So the prodigal son returns then?" A familiar voice drifted towards Jamie. His eyes snapped open and he glanced up, shielding his eyes from the sunlight, he could just about see Dean smirking down at him.

"Hey. Yeah I just got back yesterday?"

"And how's it been?"

Jamie rubbed his hands awkwardly, "I just couldn't take being in the house this morning. I had to get out of there, my parents are suffocating me!"

Dean snorted, "Yeah, I know the feeling." He sat down on the step next to Jamie and offered him a joint. "Here, try this. It'll make you feel a lot better."

Jamie glared at him with wide eyes. "You know I don't do drugs Dean!"

Dean just laughed at him and inhaled, "Nah, you just pass out instead."

"That's…" Jamie didn't know how to respond to that so he shifted the conversation back to Dean. "Can you stop that? Not only are you killing yourself but you're gonna get me killed too because you know my Dad and brothers can sniff that stuff a mile away! Now just get rid of it or get lost! I'm really not in the mood to piss around today!" He snapped.

Dean just grinned at his uncomfortable behaviour and stumped the cigarette out in Mary's rose bed much to Jamie's annoyance. "Suit yourself. But this… this is how I deal with things."

"By smoking weed? Yeah that's real mature." Jamie scoffed.

Dean shot him a hard glance, "Or I could just follow your lead? Try and kill myself, take the easy way out!"

"Whoa!" Jamie barked, "I never, ever tried to kill myself! I never have and I never will! I just fell asleep and didn't wake up! I fell into that whole coma thing – which you explained to me by the way!"

"Okay, so why did you have to go to a psych hospital then?"

Jamie rubbed his temple, "You can call it the nuthouse everybody else does!"

"Were you like... depressed or something?" Dean asked in a hushed voice.

"Yeah, that's one way of putting it."

"I hear you. Sometimes you feel so high one minute and then the next you just… feel like shit. No, worse than shit!"

"What made you think I had tried to off myself anyway?" Jamie asked through narrowed eyes.

"Kirsten Myles spread it through the whole school on the last day!" Dean said apologetically, "Her father works at the hospital and she found out that way. We tried – telling everyone it wasn't real but, you know what our school's like, they lapped it up! I'm sorry man."

"It's okay," Jamie said miserably, "That's what everyone's going to think isn't it? That I'm suicidal because of the shooting and a head case." He buried his face in his hands, "Oh God how am I ever gonna face them when we go back?"

"You might not have to, chances are they'll forget all about it over the summer. Hey, I have an idea!" Dean suddenly said, snapping his fingers in excitement. "Kenny Maverick's parents are out of town and he's throwing a party tonight. You should come and see everyone."

"A party?" Jamie muttered weakly, "No… I can't. Not yet."

"Aaaw come on!" Dean nudged him, "When was the last time you got out?"

Jamie gave a sour laugh, "I can't even remember."

"Well, come out tonight and show everyone you're okay. You can see everyone you're going to see at school anyway, they'll tell people, and your rep's back on track. Plus there'll be all the booze you want!" Dean pitched, eagerly.

"I actually can't drink alcohol at the moment," Jamie said, feeling slightly embarrassed at revealing this, "See… I'm on these special meds and… you know."

"Oh. Fair enough." Dean lapsed into thoughtful silence.

"So... what's being going on while I was away?"

Dean fidgeted awkwardly, "Um... Josh and Kelli broke up."

"What? Why?"

"Yep. Apparently he was feeling guilty for leaving us alone in the Nintendo store with - well you know..." Dean shook his head. He just couldn't bring himself to say his name.

"I - I had no idea!" Jamie said in disbelief, "He always used to act like nothing was wrong - that he wasn't affected by it."

"Yeah, well that's Josh all over isn't it," Dean replied dismissively, "At least you know you're not the only one suffering."

Jamie was at loss at what to say... his two best friends had split up... they couldn't cope either...

"The police came round day before yesterday; they wanted to talk to me about the shooting." Dean said with some hesitation.

"Yeah I know, my Dad told me. They want us to make a formal statement."

"Have you told anyone that you know the identity of the Sniper?" Dean asked nervously.

"Not yet." Jamie answered shamefully, "I keep meaning to but I don't know how to break it to them. And now the police are involved… What did your folks say when they found out?"

Dean laughed bitterly, "Them? They were just furious I lied to the police in the first place."

"What?" Jamie exclaimed in shock, "But – but do they know how traumatized and upset you were? This is Jared we're talking -"

"They don't care Jamie!" Dean said indifferently. "Look – I gotta go help my Dad fix his stupid engine." He stood up and dusted himself off. "But if you change your mind about the party call me okay. I'm designated driver." Dean hopped over the small wall separating their houses and hurried into his house.

_**7:10pm**_

"Jamie," Mary called anxiously from the doorway of the living room. "The Commissioner is here to see you."

Jamie, who had been curled up on the sofa clutching the comforter, just watching Angel re-runs all evening, instantly stood up and tried to make himself look decent.

The Commissioner gracefully stepped into the living room and immediately took his hat off. He was as tall as Jamie remembered but had aged considerably. "Hello Jamie. Long-time no see." He said softly, extending his hand.

"Hi – hi Mr Lewis." Jamie stammered as he shook the Commissioner's hand. "It's good to see you again."

"On a sugar high I see!" Commissioner Lewis exclaimed in amusement as he eyed the open box of doughnuts, the open packet of Oreos and empty wrappers of Twinkies and Ding Dongs which littered the coffee table.

"Yeah," Jamie agreed, blushing furiously and impulsively stuffing the doughnuts and Oreos under the couch and clearing the wrappers off table with one swipe of his arm. "I'm- I'm just hungry."

"You're still a growing boy. May I sit down?"

"Sure!" Jamie budged up to make room. Commissioner Lewis sat down next to him and laughed at the TV.

"My kids watch this! They can't get enough of these shows!"

"It's nothing I haven't already seen before," Jamie said quickly, turning off the TV. "So… is everything… okay?"

"Well that's what I was going to ask you?" The Commissioner said in concern, surveying Jamie with his grey eyes. "Your father told me everything that happened. How are you doing Jamie, are you okay?"

"I…uh… I don't know yet Mr Lewis. Everything's been so crazy. I'm still trying to figure stuff out." Jamie answered truthfully. "But I know the police want me and Dean McGowan to make a formal statement about what happened at the Kings Plaza."

"Yes, if that's okay with you both. Your brother Daniel and Detective Sorenson will be handling this case."

Jamie's eyes widened. "Danny? Danny - he's gonna be the guy taking my statement?"

Commissioner Lewis nodded. "If it's comfortable with you then yes."

In all honesty Jamie didn't know how to feel about that. Nevertheless he nodded his approval anyway. The Commissioner stayed, chatting to Frank and Mary about the good old days. Jamie politely excused himself saying he was tired. But he wasn't.

On his way out of the living room he turned towards the staircase but then hung back when he heard Commissioner Lewis mention his name in a hushed voice.

"So, Jamie's out of that psychiatric hospital then?"

"Yeah," Frank said heavily, "He's just trying to adjust."

"And what about you Mary, how are you holding up? Really?"

"Really, I'm…" Mary struggled to find the right words to say. Jamie leaned against the doorframe, listening closely. He heard his mother sigh, " I don't know Harrison. While Jamie was in Corbel all I could think about was getting him home. I just knew that if I could put my arms around him and tell him that I loved him – then everything would be okay."

"But?" Commissioner Lewis prompted.

"But things are never that simple are they? I mean, he's here- he's right in front of us so we can all see with our own eyes just how unhappy he is. We – we can feel the pain. And I don't even know what to say or do to make things all right again."

Jamie rested his forehead against the wall, with a heavy heart. This was the exact reaction he had been afraid of.

"Having Jamie home," He heard his mother say guiltily, "I thought it would make things better but in some ways it's almost worse."

Jamie took his mother's words like a slap. He teetered away from the door, his head spinning.

"It's like trying to walk on eggshells around him, he won't open up to anyone -" Frank started to say, but Jamie had heard enough. He sneaked away upstairs and shut himself in his room.

Jamie sat on the edge of his bed and dug out his pill bottles. He was in control now, he could choose whether he took them or not. He picked up his phone and dialled Dean's number.

"Hello?"

"Hey man, you know that party at Kenny's?" Jamie twirled his sleeping pill bottle in his fingers. "I think I'm gonna go."

**_8:31pm_**

"Are you sure you're okay with coming out tonight?" Dean asked Jamie nervously as they walked into Kenny's house.

"Now I'm not so sure," Jamie mumbled in reply as he walked through many of his peers who either avoided his eye contact or gawped at him unabashed, forcing him to avert his gaze.

"Jamie!" Kenny called in welcome, wading his way through a throng of people with a cup in one hand and a large bottle of vodka in the other. "Glad you could make it." Jamie could tell that he'd had more than a few sips of that vodka – and other stuff.

"Yeah," Jamie said, his tone clearly wishing otherwise.

Kenny pressed the cup of Coke into his hands and then poured in a large measure of vodka, "Get some of that in you!" He shouted over the blaring music, "After being locked up in a psych hospital I'm sure you could use it!"

"Say it a little louder Kenny I don't think the people in Times Square heard you!" Jamie yelled back, embarrassed. He started to tip the cup back into his mouth but Dean grabbed his arm.

"What are you doing?" He asked sternly, "I thought you were on medication?"

"I didn't take it!" Jamie said loudly, then he knocked the entire cup back in one go, much to Dean's amusement. "I'm gonna go find Zoe and the others."

"Okay," Dean said quickly, "I'll come with you."

They went in search of their friends, pushing through the people who stared at Jamie and talking to the ones who stopped to ask him sympathetically, 'how he was.' Jamie felt humiliated; he didn't know what to say to them. It felt so awkward and tiresome, trying to explain to all his friends over and over again that he wasn't trying to attempt suicide and there was nothing they could've done to help him because… he wasn't trying to attempt suicide.

Jamie was glad to find Josh and Zoe hanging around in the kitchen. Their eyes lit up when they saw him.

"Jamie!" Zoe hugged him, followed by Josh. At that moment, Jamie felt a lot happier at being surrounded by his best friends.

"So… how are you feeling?" Zoe asked awkwardly. And there it was. Happy moment was gone.

"I'm feeling…" Jamie's eyes did a quick scan of the kitchen saw a three-quarter empty bottle of vodka. With his mother's words still ringing in his ears, he picked it up, poured it out and drank it straight. His throat burned, he squinted back at them.

"Jamie!" Dean gasped in concern, "What the hell?"

"That's how I'm feeling!" Jamie jeered, glaring at them. He suddenly felt very light headed as all the alcohol flooded to his brain. But it felt… better. Somehow, all his feelings and emotions seemed to numb and he felt like he was able to just forget.

Gabe Trotter walked past with a tray of shots, "What's up Reagan, they let you out of the cuckoo hut early?"

Feeling his face burn with further shame, Jamie took a swig of every single shot on the tray much to the bewilderment of everyone in the room, "Do us all a favour and piss off Gabe!" He murmured.

Gabe stalked away, looking slightly offended.

"How many of those has he had?" Josh asked Dean fiercely.

"I – he hasn't had much!" Dean objected.

"Jamie, maybe you should eat something," Josh suggested in agitation. "Here have some pizza." He thrust a box with a few greasy slices in his face. "Just eat it and soak up some of that alcohol."

"I don't want to Josh," Jamie said defiantly, pouring himself some more vodka. "The only thing –the only thing I want to do right now is forget!"

It was so easy to lose sight of everything when you're amidst the blissful experience of alcohol. Jamie was able to just block everything out for - what seemed like hours. His friends trailed behind him, worried about his health and sanity. After all, he had just come out of a mental hospital. It was suddenly becoming hot in the house, too hot. And Jamie was starting to feel very dizzy.

"I – I need some air," He announced, heading outside through the back-door.

"Look, Jamie maybe you should just switch to water," Josh said seriously, following his best friend outside.

"Oh… what is the matter with all of you?" Jamie complained noisily, "I've just come out of a psych hospital not rehab! I wanna party and have a good time, I mean, that's why you bought me here in the first place isn't it?" He glowered at Dean who shrunk back guiltily.

"I – I just thought that it would be a good idea – that if people saw you, they'll see that you're okay." Dean said weakly.

Jamie laughed, "Yeah, and how's that working out for you?"

"We'll deal with you later," Zoe grumbled at Dean before turning back to Jamie, "J we don't want you to make yourself ill."

"You just don't get it do you?" Jamie mumbled, close to tears, "I already am ill Zo! Up here!" He jabbed at his head. "That's what everyone here thinks don't they?"

"No!" Zoe said desperately, "They don't!"

But Jamie wouldn't listen to her, he tried to walk away but he ended up colliding straight into Rick Caine, the meanest kid in their year. Jamie had never liked Rick Caine and the tension was further strained given that Rick used to give them hell during the first few months of high school, culminating into him beating up Josh one afternoon in the changing room after school. That prompted Jamie to seek revenge by spreading a vicious rumour about him throughout the whole school via internet which spread it within one minute. Rick had threatened to kill Jamie had it not been for Danny who threatened him with the same warning. Only then, Rick backed off but he always grabbed an opportunity to smash into Jamie in the hallway or heckle during one of his basketball matches.

"Watch where you're going Reagan!" Rick barked.

"You bumped into me Rick!" Jamie stated angrily.

"It's okay Rick," Josh said in a panicked voice, rushing to Jamie's aid, "He's just had a bit too much to drink."

"Yeah? Well, splash some cold water over his face and get him out of mine!" Rick said, surveying Jamie with dislike.

"Of course, come on Jamie let's go -"

"Did you say something Rick?" Jamie asked rebelliously at the top of his voice, resisting as Josh tried to push him back towards the house. "Only you opened your mouth and this dull sound came out."

Many people were forming a circle around them, looking on in amusement at Jamie's bravery. No one would have dared to talk to Rick Caine like that.

Rick folded his large arms over his broad chest and started advancing towards Jamie, his face set in a thick growl. "What did you say Reagan?"

"You have no right to judge anybody!" Jamie shouted, "You – aggressive, bullying, creep!"

"Jamie just drop it will you!" Josh tried to say but Jamie ignored him.

"You know, you should've been arrested for assault, we could've had you locked up - in fact we should have had you locked up after what you did to Josh!" Jamie spat, trying to pour out all of his suppressed anger onto his arch nemesis.

"Jamie that was a long time ago, I've forgotten all about it, please let's go!" Josh begged.

"From what I hear you're the only one who's been locked up," Rick said smugly. Jamie flinched in resentment and humiliation. "It's a shame they let you out, a pathetic basket case like you, who needs you?"

Whether it was the alcohol, the heat of the moment or the many years of torment Jamie had to endure with Rick Caine, Jamie drew his whole right arm back and punched Rick full on in the face, taking out all the rage and pain and embarrassment he had been repressing in that one punch. Everyone looking on, gasped and a few people even applauded.

"Jamie!" Josh held him back and the two of them stared at Rick fearfully who towered over them.

"You just never learn do you?" Jamie cowered as Rick pulled his own beefy arm back and was halfway into pounding it down onto Jamie, when a steady hand swiftly shot out and grabbed Rick's wrist.

"What the -?"

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," Danny growled.

"You!" Rick fumed, "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I've come to take my brother home, now leave him alone or you'll be writing with your left hand for the rest of your life!" Danny still held Rick's wrist in a firm grip.

"I don't know why you're having a go at me for; he's the one who started it!" Rick said savagely, shrugging his arm out of Danny's hold.

"Don't make me finish it," Danny threatened.

A few people tittered, Rick looked furious. "You'll pay for this," he promised menacingly to Jamie, "You wait till next year when your big brother isn't there to protect you."

"Oh but I will be. You may not see me but I'll always be around. You so much as blink in his direction ever again, I'll personally have you locked up for harassment." Danny warned belligerently, "Now get the hell out of my sight Caine before I do something I regret."

Rick threw Jamie a filthy look, telling him this wasn't over, and then he pushed through the crowd of people, cursing angrily. Danny turned his full attention to his brother who tried to stand up straight.

Danny inched closer and scrutinised Jamie's eyes. "Have you been drinking?" he asked suspiciously.

"No I haven't touched a drop," Jamie said cheekily, waving the nearly empty bottle of vodka at him. "Cheers!"

Danny's eyes narrowed in anger, "I don't believe this!"

"Do you want some?" Jamie offered.

"No I don't!" Danny said indignantly. "I thought you were on a heap of medication."

"I've found something much better than anti-depressants bro," Jamie slurred, shaking the bottle at him.

"I've had enough of watching you embarrass yourself!" Danny roughly seized Jamie's arm and marched him away, he dropped the bottle on the floor in shock.

"Hey! Where are you taking me?" Jamie cried.

"I'm taking you home!" Danny declared, completely oblivious to the fact that he was a cop at an unsupervised party where there was underage drinking, "I need to get you to sober up quickly before Ma and Dad sees you!"

"How did you even find me?"

"Well, when Ma called me and started freaking out that you weren't in your room and the window was thrown wide open, I started calling round and in the end Josh told me where you were!"

They reached Danny's car, he opened the passenger door for Jamie but he just leaned against the car, his head was spinning.

"What the hell were you thinking getting drunk at a time like this Jamie?" Danny asked crossly.

"I – I, uh…" Wave after wave of nausea was beginning to hit him until…"I – I don't feel well," Jamie murmured, clutching his stomach.

Danny immediately grabbed his brother and turned him around, almost shoving his head into a nearby flowerpot just as Jamie began to throw up.

"Yep. Just get it all out of your system kid," Danny advised in exasperation, gently rubbing his brother's back as he retched into the flowerpot.

"How do you get it all out…?" Jamie coughed, his head hanging into the azaleas.

"You gotta keep puking kid," Danny said, remembering his own nights out in which he usually ended up worse than his head in a bunch of flowers, puking his guts out.

"Okay… done." Jamie grunted. He slowly began to straighten himself up.

"I'm not promising it's clean." Danny handed him his handkerchief. "Keep it. Now let's get you home." Once Jamie was in safely, Danny pulled out of the driveway. "Joe's been pacing around the block just in case you come back, Ma and Dad have been worried sick."

"Is Ma really angry?" Jamie asked meekly.

"I think she might be when she finds out what you've been up to." Danny grumbled.

"I'm sick of everyone treating me like I'm a little kid!" Jamie huffed.

"Because you are a kid, you're sixteen!" Danny said emphatically.

"I'm nearly seventeen!" Jamie protested.

Danny scoffed, "Same difference, it's still illegal."

"Like you never did the same thing when you were my age?" Jamie challenged.

"Hey!" Danny reproached, slapping Jamie lightly on the cheek, "Let's not drag that one up! Besides this is exactly what I wanted you to avoid. You're the golden boy, you're supposed to be locked up inside your room studying not partying!"

It was Jamie's turn to scoff, "Yeah, well maybe I'm done being Mr Perfect."

Danny cast a concerned glance towards his brother and tried to keep his eyes on the road. "What's going on in that head of yours Jamie? We talked about this. I thought everything was going okay."

"You don't want to know," Jamie replied sadly. "I don't even know myself. I just thought that if I could have a few drinks, then I'd be able to forget about everything."

"You don't need alcohol to do that kid," Danny said worriedly, "Once you open that door, you'll never be able to close it no matter how hard you try. Trust me, I've been there and in aint pretty."

"Well Dean said -"

"Dean!" Danny cheered, nodding in confirmation, "Of course! I was just waiting for his name to drop into this story somewhere!"

"Danny don't," Jamie whined, "I'm not in the mood to take notes while you lecture!"

"How about an 'I told you so?' Can I least say that?" Danny asked with a smirk.

Jamie just sighed and slumped against the side of the car, his head feeling heavy.

Danny pulled into the driveway of their house, he switched off the engine and the two of them just sat there, trying to decide each other. Luckily they were saved that trouble when Joe tapped on Jamie's window and then opened his door.

"Finally!" He said in a relieved voice, pulling Jamie into a hug, "Don't ever run off like that again!"

"God the way everyone's behaving around me it's like I'm six years old!" Jamie raged, pushing Joe away from him and storming into the house, only to be greeted again by his haughty looking parents who were waiting for him by the foot of the staircase. "Ah great," he muttered, rolling his eyes.

"Where have you been?" Mary hissed, "Have you any idea how worried your father and I were?"

Joe and Danny silently trooped inside the house.

"Yeah story of your life Ma!" Jamie retorted aggressively. "Can't you relax for while? Just try it, you might surprise yourself or is that too much to ask -"

"Jamie!" Joe interrupted sharply, "Shut up, what's wrong with you?"

Frank suspiciously inched closer to his youngest son who tried to keep his composure. "Have you been drinking?" He asked, peering into Jamie's eyes.

Jamie blinked. "No," He tried to sound convincing but failed miserably.

"You've been drinking – alcohol?" Mary asked in a hushed voice.

"No Ma, I've been getting wasted on water and juice!" Jamie sung sarcastically.

Frank took a deep breath and said as calmly as he could, "Jamie I know it's going to take some time to adjust to being back at home after – where you've been -"

"This is a joke right?" Mary asked in disgust, "Our youngest son comes home drunk and you're just going to go easy on him? Just like that?"

"Bet my record's looking quite clean now huh Ma?" Danny joked in a brave attempt to lighten the mood. Mary fired him a death glare and he backed away.

"You snuck out and went to a party where there was underage drinking!" Mary reprimanded, "While you were supposed to be resting and on medication!"

Jamie glanced at the floor and rubbed his head in irritation, he just couldn't deal with all this right now.

"You know that alcohol and anti-depressants just cancel each other out," Mary continued anxiously, "Not to mention it's highly dangerous, that's how most overdoses happen- Jamie – what were you thinking?"

"I – I'm not sure!" Jamie stuttered.

But Mary wasn't buying it. "Well you better get sure and explain yourself right now! You're sixteen and still very fragile and – and if you think you can just take off whenever you want -"

"Stop it Ma! Please can you just stop having a go at me for two seconds!" Jamie cried out in frustration and exhaustion. He tried to escape to the kitchen but everyone followed him.

"Don't you walk away from us young man!" Mary scolded, catching up to her son and grabbing his elbow. "That does it. You and I going to have a serious talk."

Jamie wrenched his elbow free, "In case you've forgotten, you were the one who said that having me home only makes things worse, so I'm sorry I'm such a burden!"

"What?" Danny said sharply, "Ma? Is this true?"

"What are you talking about?"

"I overheard you and Dad talking to Commissioner Lewis!" Jamie snarled, "And you think you can try and make it all better by camomile tea and cinnamon buns!"

"Jamie!" Mary said aghast, "I wasn't talking about you being a burden, I was talking about how it must be feeling for you to come back! That it must make things worse for you! I mean - you won't tell us anything, we had to hear it all off Dean!"

Jamie glanced at Danny who looked at the floor.

"I've got a better chance of winning the lottery than getting inside your head!" Mary continued to rant, "You shut us all out, close us all off. And you're not the only one that needs time to adjust you know! Because guess what? I'm not perfect okay? I can't read your mind and I'm handling it badly, okay fine, I hold my hands up and admit to that! But that doesn't give you the right to punish me by running off and drinking yourself to -"

"Punish you? I didn't do this to punish you-"

"Well you did," Mary interjected angrily, "You have no idea what it did to me, to all of us to find you gone like that! It's not like you even left a note or any sign that you had gone!"

"Just your room empty and your window wide open!" Joe added in a disapproving tone.

"Okay! I admit I screwed up, I'm sorry!" Jamie yelled. He was slowly breaking down, he couldn't handle everyone having a go at him all at once. "But you have no idea what happened to me or how I'm feeling -"

"What about talking?" Joe asked pointedly, "You could've talked to one of us!"

"There's no point! No one can do anything, it's just something that I – I just have to deal with it on my own!" Jamie stated in desperation.

"And how's that going for you Jamie?" Joe shot back.

"Just – can everyone stop going at me from all angles of the room!" Jamie said unsteadily.

"Come on guys, he said he's sorry, let him go to bed – he needs to sleep it off. We can talk about this tomorrow," Danny tried to say soothingly as he could see his brother was starting to unravel.

"No! We're having this out right now!" Mary frantically turned to her husband for support. "Frank, feel free to jump in and help me!"

"I am," Frank said calmly, "I'm listening to what our son has to say to us. After months of brushing things under rug and pretending like his problems are just teenage angst, we have to force ourselves to understand him." He turned to his youngest. "Jamie - I understand that you want some independence and you're acting out because of your frustration, but lying to us isn't the way to do that son,"

"Yeah, thank you Dr Phil, that's one way of putting it," Mary responded in a clipped voice to her husband. Then she turned to her son, "Joe was right. Do you have any idea how it felt to walk into your room and to find you missing and the window open?"

"Repetition much?" Jamie muttered.

"Now isn't the time to be cheeky! I thought that -" she quickly stopped herself. Danny, Joe and Frank reacted at her slip up.

"What?" Jamie narrowed his eyes, "You thought what Ma?"

"Doesn't matter," She answered coolly. "Just -just go to bed. I'll deal with you in the morning."

"But I -"

"Jamie you heard your mother, now get to your room – and that means stay there and go to bed!" Frank added in exasperation. "Not climb out of the window and go running amok all over the city!"

Jamie groaned, pushed past Joe and Danny who were blocking the doorway and stomped up the stairs as loud as he could, complaining loudly about how no one wants to listen to him.

As soon as they heard the deliberate slam of Jamie's room door, Mary finally allowed herself to sink into a chair. Frank placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder and she took it gratefully.

"You nearly cracked," Frank told her quietly.

"I know," Mary sighed, "But what was I supposed to do Frank? Anything could've happened to him…"

Jamie, who never actually went into his room, crept down a few steps and crouched on the staircase, so he could listen in on their conversation. It seemed like that's all he seemed to do nowadays.

"Ma," Jamie heard a scrape of a chair as Joe sat down next to their mother, "We made a deal that we weren't going to tell Jamie about Brian McCredie. If he found out that Bachman had killed him, it's only gonna make things a lot worse. He'll get worse. And we'll be back at square one all over again."

Jamie recoiled in shock, Brian McCredie was murdered by Bachman….

"I know that Joe," Frank said gravely, "But… I just don't like lying to Jamie."

"Yeah neither do I," Danny included argumentatively, "It's not fair on him!"

"I know I don't like lying to him either! But it's for his own good." Joe said forcibly. "Believe me when I say it's for the best. You think he's bad now? You tell him and you won't' have seen nothing yet!"

"This is like the terrible two's all over again!" Mary moaned, "Except this time it's more like the terrible teens!"

"At least he's talking a lot more now," Frank said hopefully, "Even if it is backchat. When I picked him up from the hospital, he was… I don't know. Distant. Not brooding or sulking. It felt like there was no connection. "

"Hence the need to get drunk," Danny pointed out in concern.

"At least when he was late past curfew or something, I knew what to say to him but… there's no guide book on how to deal with your child after they've just come out of a mental hospital." Frank said simply.

Jamie heard his mother say worriedly, "I just hope he makes it through this school year without any hitches, it's one of the most important years of his life..."

Jamie almost laughed out loud. Did his mother not think of anything else except his education?

"It'll take time but we'll get there, I know it." Frank said with assurance.

Jamie heard the scrapes of chairs and Danny's voice growing louder. He quickly tripped back upstairs and hid in the bathroom, still able to hear everything from downstairs.

Danny bade them goodnight and left, leaving Frank and Joe in the hallway.

"Joe… what's going on here? Fathers are supposed to protect their kids. Great job I'm doing!"

"You're doing an amazing job!" Jamie heard Joe say, "None of this is your fault. All we need to do is stick together and help each other through the worst of it. Everything else should just fall into place."

"You're my rock you know that," Frank said warmly, "Without you, I don't know what I'd do…"

Jamie crawled on all fours out of the bathroom, into his room and quietly shut the door. For minutes he just leaned against his door taking deep breaths and trying to figure out everything.

Jamie checked to see if his window was secure and found it was locked and bolted shut. "They locked me in," Jamie whispered to himself, "Great."

What if there was a fire and he needed to get out? Yeah didn't think of that one did you Ma, Jamie thought bitterly. He sat on his window seat and bought his knees up to chest so he could hug them. So, Bachman knew he was being hunted. If he caught up with Brian then he could definitely come here. Jamie stared out into the night wondering what Steve Bachman was planning right now.

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><p>To be Continued...<p> 


	17. Chapter 17  Operation Annihilation

**Author's Note: **Thanks once again for all you guys that reviewed! Well here's what really happened that day at the mall - Jamie's gonna give his statement and in the beginning there's a little bit of Joe/Jamie bonding. Sorry it's a bit later than I planned but Uni's piling up with work and blah, blah, blah...the next one will be up soon. Anyway enjoy this chapter and please review!

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><p><strong>Chapter 17 – Operation Annihilation<strong>

_**July 2nd 2000**_

_**3:30am**_

_Everything seemed so perfect. They were all at the Schneider's barbecue, eating, drinking, joking, having a great time. Jamie felt so happy and so relaxed. Just as he turned around, he saw Bachman striding towards him with a pistol aimed right at him. He tried to scream for help but no sound came out, no one even seemed to notice, they just carried on eating and drinking and joking!_

_Bachman cocked the gun and fired; Jamie tried to duck and held his hands up to shield his face. Nobody did anything! _

Jamie woke with a gasp. He turned his heavy head towards his alarm clock and saw that it had just gone half three in the morning. Jamie tried to sit upright as slowly as he could, his head was thumping. He didn't want to take any sleeping pills, he'd had enough of those. Feeling like he needed a nice, warm glass of milk to help ease him to sleep, he peeled his covers back and swung his legs over the bed. He tiptoed a few centimetres, when his foot collided into something squishy.

"Whoa!" Jamie cried out in surprise as he tripped and fell onto – "Joe?"

"Aha!" Joe cried out in pain as Jamie fell on him.

Jamie shifted uncomfortably off Joe and scrambled for the light. He snapped it on and saw Joe slouched against the side of his bed on a blow-up mattress, shielding his eyes from the light with his hair slightly tousled.

"What are you doing sleeping on my floor?" Jamie demanded. "Oh wait, don't tell me," Jamie added, catching Joe's sheepish look squinting up at him. "Ma sent you in on suicide watch or to be guard dog. Make sure I don't try and sneak out again."

"Jamie -" Joe tried to mumble sleepily.

"What, nailing my window shut during the Summer and being yelled at when you've got a splitting headache isn't punishment enough? Now I gotta share my room with you too!"

"Jamie it was my idea!" Joe snapped, "I figured – you might want some protection – that's all."

"Why would I want protection?" Jamie asked, feigning a look of innocence.

Joe shrugged, "I just wanted to let you know, literally that you're not alone. That's all."

Jamie groaned and rubbed his head, "Great…I think my hangover's kicking in."

Joe's eyes narrowed, "Where are you going?"

"I'm just going downstairs to our kitchen to get a warm drink of non-alcoholic milk." Jamie said emphatically. "Is that okay with you?"

Joe stood up, "Fine, I'll make it for you then."

Jamie's head was thumping too much for him to argue so he just opened the door and traipsed downstairs with Joe close behind him.

"Why can't you just take your sleeping pills if you're having trouble sleeping?" Joe asked in concern as they settled themselves in the kitchen. He busied himself with boiling the milk, "I mean… that's what they're there for."

Jamie rested his chin on his hands as he watched his brother. "I don't want to. I hate taking that stuff it just makes me feel all sluggish and weird. I feel better without them."

"Shouldn't you let Dr Rimmer make that decision Jamie?" Joe said through narrowed eyes.

"Just leave it Joe!" Jamie retorted in exhaustion.

"All right, all right," Joe spooned some cocoa powder into the milk, "I'm just saying. It would save all this trouble."

"Yeah I know," Jamie murmured, "I'm sorry, I just… I know what I'm doing. You've got to let me make my own decisions. I can't be coddled all the time! I mean, I'm gonna be seventeen in a couple of months, you have to trust that I can think for myself."

"No one's saying you can't Jamie," Joe said gently, "But there are some decisions you can't make on your own. If we let you – and then something happened – we'll never forgive ourselves. I know what it's like to be your age, to feel like you want some kind of responsibility - but you need to just relax and enjoy being a kid and trust the people around you that they're acting out of their best interest because we love you. Dad may seem like he buries his head the sand but he doesn't, I know him. That's just his way of coping with stuff. And Erin will coddle you because - well she's Erin. I know Ma overreacts and seems a little neurotic, but with a husband and two sons on the streets everyday you can hardly blame her can you?"

"I suppose not," Jamie murmured.

"And Danny? I know he's got a shoot first ask questions later policy but he'll always put you first because you're our baby brother and we want to look after you." Joe said in a serious tone. "Do you get it? It's not a chore, it's something we've been... I dunno, genetically programmed to do since the day you were born."

Jamie snorted, "Okay Joe!"

"It's true!" Joe grinned, "I'm serious! We all used to pick on each other yet when anyone else was picking on one of us - or you... we'd always stick together have each other's backs. People are jealous of our relationship Jamie. The Reagan Siblings. You remember Mr Watkins the Physics teacher?"

"The one with the limp?"

"Yeah. He always used to say, to understand one Reagan, you gotta understand all four!"

Jamie beamed in surprise, "He said that?"

Joe nodded. "My point is... You've got your whole life ahead of you to worry about being responsible and making the right choices. Trust me when I say that right now you should be trying to make the most of being your age. And after what you've been through? No one deserves to be happy more than you Jamie, no one." Joe poured the hot chocolate into two mugs. "Here. This should help."

"Thanks. You know Joe... that's what I used to think about... all of us together. When I was in Corbel, just to help me get through an hour even. I'd picture us all as we used to be - at the dinner table or shooting hoops. Or any memory." Jamie said quietly, tracing the mouth of the mug with his finger. "And I'm back there again, and for a while I can just forget."

"Was it – was it really that bad?" Joe asked hesitantly.

Jamie took a few tentative sips, "Well put it this way. I'm never going back."

"Drink up then!" Joe smiled, trying to lighten the mood after a few heavy seconds. "You need to get some sleep. You've got a big day ahead of you."

"Why?" Jamie asked suspiciously, his stomach churning, "What's going on today?"

Joe's smile faded, "Didn't Dad tell you? Today's the day you give your statement to the police."

Jamie almost scalded his tongue, "What? Today, but – but – Joe – I'm not ready -!"

"Hey, hey!" Joe grabbed his brother's arms in order to calm him down, "It's okay. It's gonna be Danny and Detective Sorenson, you know him, it'll be fine. And look, if you're still not sure – we'll be watching in observation."

"You guys will all be watching?" Jamie asked nervously.

"If you want us to… then of course, we have your back, you know that." Joe said with a considerate smile.

Jamie returned the smile gratefully, "Thanks Joe." He finished his drink and slipped off the stool, turning back to his brother he said softly, "Dad's right. You are our rock. I don't know what we'd do without you."

_**10:08am**_

"We really don't have to do this now you know." Danny said kindly to his brother as they seated themselves in the interrogation, prepared to take Jamie's statement. "It might be too soon..."

"No it's okay!" Jamie said hurriedly, "I want to do this now. It'll help."

Danny grinned, "Atta boy. Okay. Whenever you're ready. Take your time kid."

"You just need to tell it like you remember it Jamie. Every detail helps." Frank's voice echoed around the room from the monitor. Jamie looked right at the observation window where his family all stood and nodded, his teeth clenched. He stomach was churning… this was it, this was the moment that everyone finds out.

Detective Sorenson sat next to Danny and set up the tape recorder. "Okay Jamie just tell it to us from your perspective, we'll ask some questions and you just answer them as you remember okay?" Detective Sorenson explained.

Jamie nodded again, his throat feeling tight.

"Oh yeah, and when you need to refer to Bachman, just refer to him as the Sniper okay?" Jamie nodded again. He couldn't talk; he was saving it all for his statement. Danny finished setting the tape recorder up and Sorenson hit the record button. Both of them stared at Jamie in anticipation, waiting for him to start.

Jamie took a shuddering breath, "Well… it all began on Saturday May twentieth two-thousand. It just started off as a normal Saturday for me. My friends and I were bored and had nothing to do so we all went to the mall in a big group."

"Who's we?" Detective Sorenson asked softly.

"Dean McGowan, Josh and Zoe D'Luca, Kelli Vecchio and – Jared Henderson." Jamie swallowed and looked at Danny for support. He nodded in encouragement.

_Dean poked his head out of the window of his car and hollered at Jamie and Jared who were perched on the wall. "Hey! I'm going to the mall, you guys wanna come with?"_

"_Sure, let's go!"_

"Things were fun for a while. We messed around in all the different stores. But then the guys and I wanted to go to the Nintendo store you know, just to see what they had."

"But the girls didn't want to come in with you?" Sorenson checked.

"_You guys wanna waste time looking at boring video games you can count us out!" Zoe huffed._

"_I'm hungry!" Kelli whined, "Zoe and I are gonna go get a hot dog, you can join us when you've grown up!"_

"Yeah, they went to the food court I think. Anyway we were in the Nintendo store for quite a bit."

"Roughly how long do you think you were in there for?"

"Maybe …three hours," Jamie answered, "Four tops. I never really checked it all went by so fast."

Sorenson nodded and gestured for him to continue.

"We were just messing around, looking at all the stuff, when we heard these… popping noises. It sounded like firecrackers. Jared was the one who noticed it first actually. None of us thought anything of it. Until the screaming started, that's when things started to get a little weird… but even then we didn't pay attention. Then some guy runs into the store, he's clutching onto his shoulder which – which was stained red. Looking back on it now – I think it was blood. Yeah, it – it was probably blood." Jamie said in a daze.

Danny tried to remain expressionless and not show how pained he was by hearing all this from his little brother.

"So what did this guy do?" Sorenson prompted.

"He said that there was a guy out there shooting people," Jamie answered in a dull voice. "And he said that we all had to get out now. He had come in just to warn us. And then – about a split second later – the Sniper shot him from outside the window, killing him. Glass was flying everywhere, people started screaming and climbing over each other so they could either find a way out or barricade us in. The way Josh looked at me, we both knew that it was serious. And we didn't know if were even gonna make it. I asked him about Zoe. I wanted to know if she and Kelli were safe so – I sent Josh out. There was a whole crowd of people by the door, trying to get out and Josh kind of, got carried away by them."

"So he was out of the store at this point?"

"Yes. It was risky and dangerous I know – but I had to know if Zoe and Kelli were okay, I mean, they were out there somewhere…." Jamie rubbed his forehead and continued, "I think people were calling for help, on their phones."

Danny turned around and cast a brief look at the observation window where his family were stood. The rest of them remembering those chilling phone calls all too vividly.

Jamie sighed, "Then the Sniper came into the store."

"_Everyone shut up, or I'll kill you!"_

"What was he wearing, can you remember?"

"He was dressed all in black with this ammunition vest strapped to his chest – like the kind people wear when they go out hunting, and he had on a black ski mask. And he also had a huge black duffel bag with him. He pointed his gun at us and we backed away, some people got behind the counter but he made them come out."

"So there are more people in the store with you, when he first entered?" Sorenson asked, noting this down.

"_Get back, get back, don't move! All of you shut up or I will shoot you!"_

"What else did he do?"

_Bachman pointed the gun at Jamie, "You, what's your name?"_

"_Jamie!" he answered instantly._

"_Jamie get up!" Jamie rose to his feet trembling, "Stand over there by the phone, near the storeroom, go on go!"_

_Jamie tripped over several people in his haste to get to the back of the room._

"He – pointed the gun at me…" Jamie said vaguely, the memory which had been buried in the back of his mind was suddenly becoming clearer, like it happened yesterday. "He asked me what my name was and then… when I told him, he asked me to go and stand by the phone – near the storeroom."

Danny's eyes widened.

"Okay," Sorenson noted this, "Then what happened?"

_Bachman emptied his duffel bag which was filled with shells, then he opened the door and ushered a few more terrified people into the store._

"_Get in, get in, shut up or I'll shoot you, get in and sit down!" He threatened, jabbing the gun in their backs._

"So more people were forced into the store?" Detective Sorenson said, scribbling this down. "Do you have any idea how he got them in?"

"I – I think it was almost like he had someone on the outside who were bringing them in." Danny and Sorenson exchanged a knowing glance. "I don't know where they came from. I think they were people who were in the other stores and were trying to get out."

"Did you see anyone outside the Nintendo store Jamie?"

Jamie shook his head. "No. No actually I was um...I was too busy focusing on the people inside the store..."

_Jamie saw a young boy aged about thirteen, huddled on the floor crying. Jamie took a tentative step towards him but his move was censored by Bachman who whipped out his pistol and pointed it at him._

"_Hey, I thought I told you not to move!" Bachman shouted, flailing the pistol at Jamie. Dean subtly tried to inch closer to him so he could pull him back down._

"_Easy, easy, easy," Jamie held his hands up. "I just wanted to see if that kid is okay – he looks scared."_

"_Did I ask you to do that? Huh?" Bachman raged, "Did I ask you to play the Good Samaritan? No now sit down." He pressed the gun into Jamie's forehead and forced him back down. "Do you want me to make an example out of you?" Bachman said menacingly. "Or maybe even one of your friends here…" He turned the gun to Jared who gasped._

_Jamie shook his head in terror. "No! I'm sorry – I'll do whatever you say!" Dean grabbed him by the corner of his T-shirt and forced him back down._

_Bachman raised his rifle and fired a couple of shots at the ceiling, __people screamed and ducked as the sparks from the light bulbs blew out. "You guys remember I'm the one in charge now! The one you listen to and obey! Do as I say or you die!"_

Danny swallowed hard. Detective Sorenson had warned him that interviewing family members was gonna be tough but Danny thought he could handle it. Now he wasn't so sure.

"It was like I wasn't even there. It was like I was standing outside my body, like a ghost and was watching these things happening to someone else." Jamie said in a hollow voice. "I hated the way he had control over everyone. Including me."

_Police sirens could be heard, the phone rang. Bachman whipped around and pointed his rifle right at Jamie, "You!"_

"_Me?"_

"_Yeah you, answer the goddamn phone!" Bachman ordered fiercely, keeping one eye on the door._

_Jamie quickly picked up the phone, "Hello?"_

"_Aah, yes hello, my name's Tim, I'm the hostage negotiator, may I know who I'm speaking to?"_

"Crap, I've just remembered! He knows my name!" Jamie clapped his hand to his forehead, "He knows my full name!"

"But I thought you never told him?" Danny asked with narrowed eyes.

Jamie shook his head, "I think did it without realizing."

"How could you have done it without realizing Jamie?" Danny asked in disbelief.

"You don't remember that call?"

"_Uh… Jamie Reagan."_

"_Oh Jamie that's you! Okay, Jamie – I have your Dad and your brothers here, they want to know if you've been hurt? Just answer yes or no."_

"_No -"_

"_What's he saying?" Bachman demanded from the other end of the store._

"_What's he saying?" Jamie repeated emphatically into the phone. "He's saying…"_

"_Okay, Jamie tell him that we just want to know if everything's okay in there?" Tim said very quickly._

"_It's the cops, they want to know if everything's okay in here," Jamie told him._

"_Gimme that!" Bachman started striding over to where he stood._

"_Okay he's wants to talk to you -" _

_Bachman snatched the phone out of Jamie's hand, "I'm gonna tell you this right now," he hissed into the receiver, "I don't wanna see any cops near me! Or I'll start shooting people! I've got a lot of terrified people in here and most of them are kids, and yes, I can do it!" He slammed the phone down._

"I think that call must've freaked him out," Jamie said anxiously, "Because after that he started to really hype it up."

Danny consulted the notes, "He shot and killed Ted Caulfield seconds after that call."

Jamie nodded painfully. "Yeah. He was that kid that I saw was upset. He just wanted to use the bathroom – and he got shot."

"_Okay everyone shut up!" Bachman barked, waving his rifle around, as people tried to frantically crawl away from the pool of blood which was spreading out of Ted Caulfield's head. He fired a few shots in the air. Jamie, along with everyone else, clapped their hands over their ears. "I said shut up! I need you all to shut the hell up!"_

_Jamie turned away and tried to take deep, even breaths. He couldn't look at that poor kid who was lying there, dead on the floor. _

_A woman was seated in the brace position clutching her daughter to her chest, crying, "Please, let me go, my little girl needs a doctor. She's asthmatic- and I think I must've dropped her inhaler!"_

_Jamie tiptoed a few inches to his left so he could peer over the heads of the frightened hostages. He saw the little girl hanging limply in her mother's arms._

_Bachman jerked the rifle towards her, "What's your name?"_

"_Megan," She replied instantly._

"_Well Megan it's just unfortunate for you. You're all going to die today anyway," Bachman said calmly, "It's better she just gets this over with."_

_Megan buried her face in her daughter's hair. Jamie saw her shoulders shaking as she heaved heavy sobs._

_The phone rang again. Jamie looked at Bachman. "Answer it!" He barked._

_Jamie picked up the receiver. "Hello?"_

"_It's Tim, listen, Jamie do not repeat what I am about to tell you?" Tim said frantically. "We have the SWAT team surrounding the mall and the helicop-"_

"_Who is it?" Bachman asked, wading through the crowd who eyed his gun fearfully._

"_Uh…"_

"_Tell him, it's Tim Sullivan, the hostage negotiator and we want to know how long he's planning on staying there."_

"_It's Tim Sullivan, the hostage negotiator and they want to know how long you're planning on staying here." Jamie repeated automatically. _

"_Tell them I'm not ready to come out! I'm not done carrying out my plan yet!" Bachman said with vindictive pleasure._

"_He – he said he's not ready to come out because- he's not done killing people yet!" Jamie stammered into the receiver._

"Did he ever explain to you what the plan was?" Danny asked quietly.

"No, he didn't. I just assumed he meant killing people."

"When you were talking to Detective Sullivan on the phone, was the Sniper by the door, the whole time?" Sorenson questioned.

"Yeah. It was like he was looking for someone."

"Excluding the Sniper and including Ted Caulfield, how many people were in the store with you?" Sorenson asked.

"Less than fifteen, no more than twenty," Jamie answered softly. "Maybe thirteen."

_Jamie could hear the commotion on the other end of the line, he thought he heard Danny's voice say, "I wanna talk to my brother!"_

"_Jamie!" Tim was back on the phone, "Without counting, I'm gonna need you to tell me how many people are in the store with you?"_

"_Uh…" Jamie did a quick scan of the room._

"_Are there more than twenty?"_

"_No."_

"_Are there less than fifteen."_

"_Yes. Like…thirteen or something."_

"_What's he saying now?" Bachman asked Jamie impatiently._

"_What's he saying now?" Jamie repeated pointedly, back into the receiver. "Uh..."_

"_Okay, ask him if there's anything he wants." _

_Jamie cradled the phone, "They wanna know if you need anything."_

"_Some food would be nice!" Bachman huffed, still patrolling the door, "Ask them to get some food!"_

"_He wants food," Jamie mumbled into the phone._

"_Jamie listen up this is important; ask him if he's willing to let some people go in exchange for the food." Tim ordered firmly._

"_Um," Jamie tried to get Bachman's attention, "Excuse me…"_

"_What?"_

"_They wanna know if you're willing to let some people go in exchange for the food?" Jamie asked, trying to sound casual._

"And what did he say?" Danny asked with anticipation.

"Eventually, and after much persuasion, he let me pick the people to leave…"

"He let you pick?" Sorenson said quickly.

Jamie nodded, his throat was closing up. "I offered to get Jared and Dean outta there! They were my friends but… they wanted to stay with me… so I let the others go -"

"Okay Jamie, can you remember the hostages which you sent out?" Danny said emphatically, desperately begging with his eyes that Jamie gets the hint.

Jamie looked right into his brother's eyes and said straightforward, "Yes. I can remember each and every single one. Megan and her daughter, two twelve year old boys, an eighteen year old and his younger brother, another kid, a man in his late twenties and the assistant manager of the store."

Danny's eyes flooded with relief and he nodded his grateful thanks.

"_Well, well, well, looks like it's just us four." Bachman said with an evil smirk, caressing his gun with his hand. "I'm gonna let you boys in on a little secret,"_

_Jamie tried to unhook the phone underhandedly, so he could try and call for help again. But it was hard to go unnoticed when there are only three of you being held hostage. _

"_I'm gonna get the heck out of here…" Bachman glanced at the door to check if anyone else was coming. _

_Then he turned to the three of them and pointed his rifle at each of them in turn, saying in the most menacing growl, "If I get – so much as a sniff - from any cop, reporter or civilian trying to find me – I will personally break into your house when your families are asleep and kill you in you in your beds…and then when you're dead, I'll kill your families too… " He leaned closer to them, "So you better learn to sleep with your eyes open. Just some friendly advice."_

_Jamie wondered if this was what being paralyzed felt like. He couldn't move, speak, think. All he thought about was the barrel hovering very close to his temple._

"_You're not going to get away with this!" Jared said bravely._

_Dean and Jamie's heads snapped towards their friend, shooting him a perplexed and terrified look._

"_What did you just say?" Bachman asked, his tone wasn't angry or threatening. He sounded quite amused. "What the hell did you just say?"_

_Jared took a step forward so he was eye to eye with Bachman, "I said, you're not going to get away with this you asshole. I won't let you!"_

_Jamie wanted to scream at Jared to shut up but his lips felt like they were glued together. What was he doing, he was going to get them all killed!_

"_Is that so?" Bachman said very slowly._

"_Jamie? Jamie?" Danny pressed with concern, "What happened next?"_

_Jamie stood rooted to Jared's right, Dean to his left. It was like he was watching everything in slow motion. Bachman cocked his rifle, held it in position and then fired right at Jared's chest._

_Jared uttered a cry of pain and surprise as the power of the shot forced him backwards into Jamie and Dean's waiting arms. Both of them buckled to the ground as they tried to support their dying friend. His blood sprayed all over them but Jamie was too much in shock to notice or care. He knew the bullet had ripped clean through his friend's back, killing him._

_Jared coughed and spluttered ribbons of blood, dripping from his mouth, he tried to hold on but it was too late._

"_J –Jared?" Jamie sobbed, "Come on…don't do this. P – please, don't d -do this, you can't do this…"_

_Jamie felt Jared's body fall limp in his arms._

"_No… No! No!" Jamie started shaking him. Dean kneeled on his other side, knowing that Jared will never move again. "Come back, come back!"_

"_Oops," Bachman said carelessly. "Let that be a warning to the both of you!" He ran towards the storeroom and pulled out his phone. _

_Jamie didn't see him disappear through the vent, he was too busy trying to shake Jared back to life_.

"After he left Dean used the phone to call for help. They rescued us but… you know…" Jamie surreptitiously wiped a stray tear off his cheek, "It was uh... too late to save Jared. So... that's it. That's the whole story."

He had been staring at the table during his whole revelation. He finally looked up at Danny who was staring at him with a look of unbearable compassion etched upon his face.

It was official, Danny thought with trepidation. They were chasing the devil.

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><p>To Be Continued...<p> 


	18. Chapter 18  Chasing the Devil

**Author's Note: **Thanks once again to everyone who reviewed, you guys are what keeps this story going! A bit more bitching from Jamie in this chapter but everything will come to a head in the next one with lots of action so bear with! He's still suffering from post-traumatic stress! Enjoy and plz review!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 18 – Chasing The Devil<strong>

_**July 3rd 2000**_

_**2:50am**_

_He was running down a long corridor, panting, gasping for breath. He threw a glance over his shoulder and saw a masked man striding closer towards him. Jamie tried to speed up, but no matter how much power he put into his arms and legs, the corridor never seemed to end. _

"_Come on!" Jamie cried, sprinting at breakneck speed down the corridor but it just seemed to stretch on into eternity._

_The masked man was catching up to him quickly, Jamie couldn't get away, he was running out of breath and his legs were giving up._

"_NOOOO!" He tripped and fell face first._

Jamie let out a cry as he woke up. For few seconds he just lay in his bed trying to collect his thoughts, it took him a while to figure out where he was. He heard Joe stirring at the foot of his bed. Damn these nightmares! Was he ever going to get a decent night's sleep?

_**4:00pm**_

Jamie had literally spent the whole day in bed. He wasn't sleeping, just huddled under the covers and refused to come out even for meals.

Someone knocked on his door. They didn't have a special knock so Jamie just assumed it was one of his parents. "Who is it?" he called out dully.

"Jamie it's me," His mother announced in a tentative but firm voice. "I really think you should get dressed and eat something!"

"I'm fine where I am Ma!" Jamie yelled. "I already told Dad and Joe and Erin that I'm not hungry!"

There was silence on the other end of the door.

"What they didn't tell you?" Jamie continued in amusement, "I find that hard to believe seeing as you're the one who sent them -"

"All right that does it I'm coming in!" Mary barged into her son's room and let out an exasperated sigh when she saw him clustered under the bed sheets. "Jamie…" He groaned and pulled the pillow out from under his head and over his face. "I've just had a call from Dr Rimmer asking if you were okay, he said you were supposed to call and schedule an appointment with him as soon as you got back! When were you planning on doing that? Or telling us about it?"

"Oh yeah," Jamie said lazily, his voice muffled under the pillow, "I dunno…I guess I just forgot. Sorry."

Mary took in a deep breath. "He also wanted to know if you've been taking your medication and lo and behold he warned me that in your condition you might try and flush it down the toilet!"

"So did you grass me up?"

Mary crossed her arms and said thinly, "As a matter of fact, I told him all about the other night."

Jamie lifted the pillow off his face quickly, "You did what? Ma!" He scrambled upright, "Geez, feeling the love in this house!"

"I'm sorry Jamie but your antics left me no choice!" Mary said resolutely.

"I know, I snuck out, I went to a party, I came home drunk, I behaved badly!" Jamie prattled through gritted teeth, and counting on one hand. "I'm sorry okay? I don't know how many times I'm supposed to say it, but I made a mistake!"

"Jamie don't just say that to shut me up because I think you really did!" Mary hissed.

"Broken record much? I know that! And I told you that I've accepted my responsibility, can we just move on now?" Jamie implored getting more and more fed up now.

"No we can't just move on!" Mary snapped, "After you've come out of a psychiatric hospital – you behave like that!"

"Ma, we've been through this!" Jamie said in a tired voice, "I'm fine, nothing's going on! It – it was just a drink. I'm nearly seventeen. I assume I am allowed to have just a tiny slice of life left?"

"Just wait till you start working and have kids before you decide you don't have a life," Mary quipped. Jamie gave a thin smile. "I know that everything is life or death when you're a teenager but in your case honey – it could be."

Jamie avoided his mother's eye contact. "So…" He fiddled with the corner of his pillowcase, "Is Dr Rimmer really pissed at me?"

Mary sat down on the edge of his bed, "Well he asked us to monitor your behaviour and supervise your medication."

Jamie's face fell, "What do you mean, supervise?"

"I'm gonna need to be there when you take it, inspect your tongue, that sort of thing."

"No!" Jamie said in horror. "No – Ma – you can't do that, that's not fair!"

"Life's not fair," Mary replied curtly.

"Yeah don't I know it! Ma I just came out of one mental hospital, I'm not going into another -"

"Where are your pills Jamie?" Mary interrupted.

"My – my what?" Jamie's eyes darted to the drawer involuntarily. Unfortunately his mother noticed.

"Are they in here?" She darted for his bedside drawer, Jamie leaned over and tried to snatch them first but his mother beat them to it. She examined the pill bottles looking perplexed. "What the…?"

"Ma – it's not what it looks like -" Jamie started.

"These pills haven't even been opened!" Mary gushed, shaking the pill bottles at him, "They're still sealed!"

Jamie leaned his head against his headboard, preparing himself for the tirade he was about to get now.

Mary started pacing nervously, "What is going on with you? What is going on inside that head of yours?"

"Ma -"

"Don't you Ma me Jamie! You don't get to get out of this one. It was bad enough the other night but this -"

Jamie scoffed, "Yeah, I was wondering how long it was gonna be before 'the other night' came up again!" He kicked his covers off, jumped off his bed and headed outside. He just needed to get away from her but to his disappointment she followed him.

"Jamie, I haven't finished talking to you!"

"You know, it's not fair, this is the first time I ever do something even a little bit crazy and you're treating me like you did Danny!" Jamie stormed down the corridor with his mother close at his heels.

"Oh, how can you even remember that you were eight years old?" Mary rebuked sceptically.

Jamie stopped halfway down the staircase and turned towards his mother, "You'd be really surprised in what sticks in a person's mind," he replied waspishly. "No matter how old they are." He carried on walking down the stairs and marched into the kitchen.

Everybody was in the kitchen including Danny, they stopped in mid-conversation when Jamie trooped in, his face set like thunder.

"Hey kid," Danny greeted in concern, "What's up?"

"Jamie I am trying to have a civilized conversation with you!" Mary shouted from the hallway. She marched into the kitchen, still clutching the pill bottles.

Jamie rested his hands both side of the sink and tried to stare his mother down. "What?"

"Would someone please care to explain to me what's going on?" Frank asked politely.

"I'll tell you what's going on," Mary said coolly, still keeping eye contact with Jamie, "Your son hasn't been taking his medication."

Jamie glanced at Joe. Danny noticed this and frowned.

"What?" Erin said distracted, "Jamie?"

Jamie rolled his eyes, "Okay fine! I didn't take my medication, put me in jail!"

He grabbed a glass and filled it with water while his family looked on in concern.

"Jamie why haven't you been taking your meds?" Frank asked, his tone full of disappointment.

Jamie froze. He hated hearing the tone in his father's voice but he hardened himself anyway. "The anti-depressants were making me feel numb, I had no control over my emotions at all. And as for the sleeping pills…" He whipped around to face his family. "All they did was make me feel drowsy – I can't go walking around like that! Feeling like I'm about collapse any second!"

Frank relented. "Oh I see… well you should've told us."

"It's hard to explain -"

"I bet it is," Mary interjected harshly, "It's hard to explain a lot of things with you isn't it? If we had nipped this problem in the bud before all of this happened we wouldn't be here now! It's bad enough having a teenager in the house but a manic depressive one?" She shook the pill bottles at him, "No parenting book in the world can help with that one!"

"Mary," Frank said indignantly, "Post-traumatic stress isn't something that's going to just disappear with only a month of treatment. You know what Dr Rimmer said. In teenagers clinical depression usually occurs when they're grieving the loss of someone close to them."

"I knew doing the interview yesterday was a bad idea!" Danny exclaimed, shaking his head with regret.

"I thought I'd bury it by talking about it yesterday but the memory just won't die will it?" Jamie asked, his voice cracking.

Erin moved towards her brother and folded him into her arms, "It's okay. No one's expecting you to forget about it. You can deal with this in your own way," She whispered soothingly.

"It's how he's dealing with it is what I'm worried about!"

"Ma!"

"I've had enough of this!" Jamie snarled, seriously fed up, "I'm going to Josh's."

"Oh no you're not!" Mary scolded, "Until further notice you're confined to this house."

Jamie's mouth fell open. Danny tried not to laugh.

"You will not leave this house at any time," Mary continued, "You wanna hang out with your friends, bring them here, you need anything, ask one of us and we will get it for you, if you need fresh air, ask one of us and we will escort you out the front door so you can sit on the porch."

Everyone could see that Jamie's temper was just about to hit boiling point, he took a calming breath and asked evenly, "Is there any particular reason as to why you're treating me like a child?"

"We just – are worried about you," Erin answered very quickly, too quickly, "That's all!"

"Mmm," Jamie nodded sceptically, "And it's got nothing to do with the fact that Brian McCredie was murdered by Steve Bachman."

Jamie's words hit all of them hard. They all shot each other shocked looks, trying to find some way out of this while Jamie just crossed his arms over his chest and glared at them inquisitively.

"How did you find out?" Joe managed to choke.

"I'm not an idiot," Jamie answered, feeling that was the better response than, 'I was eavesdropping.'

"Look, we only found out a few days ago ourselves," Frank said gently, "Brian was found shot on the same day he made bail."

"He was shot!" Jamie exclaimed, his eyes wide. "Why did you even let him out at all?" He rounded on Erin, "Or if he was such an important witness then why didn't he get police protection?"

"We didn't think Bachman would be that quick!" Danny said defensively, "At least now we know what we're dealing with." Jamie continued to glare at them. "Look, kid I'm sorry we didn't tell you sooner but we were trying to protect -"

"I don't need protecting from the world!" Jamie complained, "I know what it's like."

"Good, then you can stay here and do something constructive with your time in it." Mary said dryly.

"Like what?"

"Like helping your brothers for a start," She indicated to the amount of papers and files strewn over the kitchen table.

Jamie opened his mouth to protest but his mother cut him off, "I only wanna hear a yes or no from you."

"Fine," Jamie said sullenly, feeling as though he might give up now, "I won't leave this house."

"Damn right you won't." Mary turned to her other two sons and said in a scolding voice, "And you really should find another dumping ground for all your stuff because I'm getting the whole kitchen re-done on Thursday."

Mary left the kitchen with her bemused husband following behind her. Jamie sank down into a chair at the table next to his brothers. He pulled a random file towards him and examined it. The file was thick with papers which looked like a list of names, dates and times. Out of all the papers, only one name was highlighted, Jackson Horner.

"So… what am I supposed to be looking for?" Jamie asked Danny, at a loss of what he was looking at.

"These lists here," Danny separated the papers, "Are a list of all the people who have rented a car from that rental shop which Brian had told us about, from May to June. And these ones here," He shifted the rest of the papers, "Are the list from the past few days."

"Okay… so are you thinking that Bachman is using an alias again?"

"Yep," Joe said grimly, "But the problem is that he's smart enough not to use the same name more than once, and right now we're at a loss at what his patterns are."

"Jackson Horner," Jamie repeated faintly. "I've heard that name… that name sounds really familiar."

"Well we already know that Jackson Horner is Steve Bachman," Danny said absently, pouring over his notes, "Brian told us he'd rented that apartment under that name. So he slipped up there!"

"You never told me that!" Jamie said quickly.

Danny looked up from his notes, "Huh?"

"Jamie?"

But Jamie was hurriedly sifting through the lists, now he had an idea of what he was supposed to be looking for. He picked up a pen and started combing through the names again.

"Uh kid, you care to fill us in?" Danny asked in amusement.

"Jackson Horner – wouldn't you say that could be shortened to Jack Horner?" Jamie asked in confirmation.

Danny exchanged a puzzled look with Joe before saying hesitantly, "Sure. I -I guess you could shorten Jackson to Jack. Why? What's your point?"

"Like the nursery rhyme!" Jamie said emphatically. "Little Jack Horner."

Danny eyes widened in bewilderment. "Okay, we have got to get you out of the house!"

"Guys look!" Jamie excitedly showed them the lists with his red pen hovering above each name. Danny and Joe leaned in together to take a closer look.

"Jackson Horner is little Jack Horner. Thomas Tucker," He circled the name, "Is little Tommy Tucker -"

"Who sings for his supper!" Joe finished in surprise. "What? I remember the rhyme?" He said defensively at Danny's raised brow.

"And then there's Jonathan Flynn!" Jamie circled the name.

"Okay, which nursery rhyme is that from?" Danny asked in bemusement.

"Ding Dong Bell," Jamie answered instantly, "Little Johnny Flynn was the kid who put the kitten in the well and who pulled her out…?" He circled the next name which was - Thompson Stout. "Little Tommy Stout."

Danny's stomach gave a pleasant jolt and he couldn't help but grin, Jamie really was a genius.

"Then we have Jack Nimbleton," Jamie circled the name, "I'm betting you anything that's from the nursery rhyme, Jack be Nimble, Jack be quick. And I'm also willing to bet that Cole Foster is Old King Cole and Dr Foster merged together." He circled the name.

"But that's it," Joe said with a frown, "The pattern runs out."

Jamie scanned the list thoroughly, going through each nursery rhyme he could think of. "No," He replied slowly, a couple of names catching his eye, "This name, John Jacobs, immediately it struck a chord with me and that annoying song, John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt. Which would probably mean," Jamie circled another name from the last list, "This one – Jake Schmidt. It's from the same rhyme, he's just playing the names around."

Danny was beaming fit to burst, "Kid - I could kiss you right now!"

"Please don't!" Jamie said in horror.

Danny just laughed, ruffled his hair and stood up abruptly, "I gotta go chase this up, we have a nursery rhyme pattern!"

As he walked out he called back to Jamie, "I'm telling you kid, you can't ignore your true calling as a cop, it's wasted as a lawyer."

_**10:30pm**_

"This is gonna be just like old times," Danny said in excitement as they dragged their blow-up mattresses downstairs and hauled them into the living room.

"Yeah, I remember," Jamie panted, slapping his mattress down on the floor, "Every Summer when it used to get too hot, we'd all sleep down here where it was cooler."

"That's right we did, and remember Erin's wedding time?" Danny grinned.

"Yeah how could we forget?" Joe replied with a snigger, "Too many relatives were staying in our rooms so we were forced to stay with Aunt Sally and had to sleep on the floor in that tiny room!"

"And we stayed up watching some of the wedding footage she took and accidently erased some of it!" Jamie giggled.

"You mean the footage Danny erased," Joe corrected with a smirk, and then ducked as a pillow came flying his way.

"Okay you boys settle down," Mary said bossily, marching into the living room laden with blankets and pillows.

"Ma we really don't need those, it's too hot, it's Summer!" Danny protested.

"It might get cold later on, just take it!" Mary ordered, shoving a duvet into her son's hands. "Now don't stay up too late, we've got the Schneider's barbecue tomorrow. Sweet Dreams!"

"You too!" They all chorused as she traipsed back upstairs. Jamie's insides were squirming unpleasantly at the sheer irony of that phrase, what with his dreams being far from sweet.

Danny turned to Jamie, his nose wrinkled, "You see kid, you're not the only one who gets treated like a six year old in this house. Whether your sixteen or twenty-six, we're always gonna be Ma's babies!"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Jamie laughed.

It was a fun night. Jamie forgot all about feeling down as he spent some time with his brothers. They watched movies and pigged out on cookies and ice-cream, just enjoying being together as the Reagan Brothers, forever bonded by blood and memories.

It was little after a quarter-to four in the morning when they decided to call it a night.

"Happy Fourth of July little brothers!" Danny announced cheerfully as he turned the TV off.

"That was the most fun I've had in a long time," Jamie said happily, he packed up the cookies and the ice-cream tubs. "I'm gonna go take this back into the kitchen before Ma sees it and has a fit."

"Ooh, good idea lil bro!"

"And…. I'm also... gonna take a sleeping pill," He said tentatively.

"You sure kid?" Danny asked in concern.

Jamie nodded, "Yeah, it'll shut Ma up."

Danny and Joe snorted. Jamie laughed and carried the food back into the kitchen. It wasn't pitch black but it wasn't light either. The kitchen was lit by a thin sliver of inky blue, the atmosphere seemed calm yet eerie. Jamie tiptoed around the kitchen, packing things away and fishing a glass out of the dishwasher without making a sound. He didn't need to be so quiet, he could hear Danny and Joe laughing in the living room. Jamie rootled a couple of pills out of his bottle and was just about to turn on the tap when a bulky shadow snailed past the kitchen window!

"Oh God!" Jamie reacted and dropped the glass in shock; it slipped through his fingers and fell to the floor with a heart stopping crash. Seconds later, he heard the heavy footsteps as Danny burst through the door with Joe tripping over him.

"Jamie!" Danny gasped ,"Are you okay? I heard something break…" His eyes wandered to the broken glass at Jamie's feet. "Kid?"

Jamie stood rooted to the spot. He couldn't move. Instead he pointed a shaking finger to the window, "The – the window," Jamie whispered, "Danny I - I think Bachman's outside!"

In an instant Danny had grabbed a knife out of the receptacle and was about to wrench the back door open. "Okay, Joe wait here with Jamie -"

"No Danny don't go out there!" Jamie begged. He couldn't stand the thought of Danny going out alone in his pyjamas and only armed with a knife.

He started to move towards Danny but Joe flung out his arm and halted him. "Jamie don't walk here, there's glass on the floor and you're barefoot!" Joe immediately sought the dustpan and brush and started sweeping the broken glass off the floor. "Are you sure it was Bachman Jamie? You don't even know what he looks like."

Jamie swallowed. "I – I saw a shadow move past the window. But it didn't move quickly, it moved really slowly, like he wanted me to see. It was either him or a burglar." Jamie turned back to Danny, "Please don't go out there Danny."

Danny was about to argue but he saw the terrified, pleading look in his brother's eyes and his brotherly instincts overrode his cop instincts and he put the knife back.

"Okay," Danny rested his hands on Jamie's shoulders, "But only because it's late and we don't have any back-up."

Jamie tried to smile, "Lame excuse but I'll take it."

"Danny and I will take shifts in playing night guard for the next few hours," Joe said to Jamie with reassurance as he tossed the glass shards away, "You should try and get some sleep."

"But - I – I wanna keep watch too!" Jamie exclaimed, "I mean – if it's me he's after then -"

"No, way no!" Danny interrupted firmly, "I'm sorry kid but that's just not even an option."

"Aaw come on-" Jamie tried to protest but Joe grabbed him by the shoulders and steered him back to the living room.

"You just get some sleep and let us worry about this one Jamie okay?" Joe said softly.

Jamie thought it better not to argue so he just nodded and snuggled back into his mattress.

"Good," Danny marched back into the room, he started arranging his pillows against the couch. "I'll take the first watch." He settled himself on the floor.

Jamie pretended to sleep for the remaining hours of the morning. He could hear Joe and Danny whisper to each other as they sat side by side keeping watch.

"Poor kid," Danny whispered, his voice filled with sympathy, "Joe - If I could trade places with him I'd do it in a heartbeat. I hope he knows that."

"I think he does," Joe whispered back, "He knows we'd do anything for each other. This guy Bachman – he's a real piece of work!"

"Yeah," Danny said grimly, "Looks like it too. I saw an old mug shot of him... he looks so soulless."

Jamie shifted uncomfortably on his mattress. Well, he already knew that.

"Danny... I think Jamie's seen his face. Bachman." Joe said in a low voice.

"What?"

"It's just something he said to me a month ago that's suddenly clicked into place. I think he's seen Bachman's identity but he's just too scared to come forth about it."

Jamie let out a long breath.

"Do you think it's because he's scared of testifying against him in court?" Danny asked in a voice laced with concern.

"Probably." Joe answered sadly. "I just wished he'd come to us sooner. Bachman's threatened him so much... he's terrified."

"Wait till I get my damn hands on him," Danny vowed. "I'm gonna put him in his grave and dance on it."

"He's determined to make sure Jamie stays quiet. He just won't give up will he?" Joe sighed.

"No," Jamie heard Danny say hoarsely, "But neither will we."

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><p>To Be Continued...<p> 


	19. Chapter 19  Out Of The Frying Pan

**Author's Note: **Hey guys, sorry it's been so long but well it's been a really rough week - anyway you guys and this story and Blue Bloods of course is what keeps me on the edge so keep reading and reviewing! This is the part I think most of you have been waiting for...

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><p><strong>Chapter 19 – Out of the Frying Pan<strong>

_**July 4th 2000**_

Jamie felt something soft and firm hitting him repeatedly over the head. He blinked himself awake and saw Danny standing behind the sofa, throwing cushions at him, forcing him to wake up.

"Rise and shine golden boy, it's time to celebrate for it's our great country's birthday!" Danny announced loudly. Too loudly for Jamie's liking.

Jamie groaned at sat up. "What time is it?" He asked sleepily, rubbing his eyes.

"Time to get up!" Mary answered from the staircase, "We have to leave in half an hour!"

"Ma just chill, it's only down the road!" Danny said lazily.

"Yes but you know what this family's like," Mary said in a clipped voice as she entered the living room, "No concept of time whatsoever."

"Hey! I resent that…" Danny trudged after her, leaving Jamie alone to gather his thoughts. He really did not feel like a barbecue today.

_**12:00pm**_

"Ma I really don't want to go!" Jamie protested as they prepared to walk down the street, "Please can I just – just stay at home?"

"Where's all this coming from?" Joe asked as he shrugged into his jacket, "Yesterday you really wanted to go."

"I've changed my mind."

"Jamie," His mother looked at him in bewilderment, "I thought you'd want to get out of the house!"

"I'm just not feeling well." Jamie answered truthfully.

Frank eyed him sceptically and then felt his forehead, "Hmm, you don't have a fever."

"It's not that kind of - not feeling well – it's the other kind," Jamie mumbled. "Look, please can I stay home."

"Well, okay," Frank said relenting, "But if you feel up to it later, call one of us and we'll come and walk you over."

Jamie nodded gratefully, "I will. Thanks Dad."

Mary on the hand just stared at her son, "I don't believe it. You never cease to amaze me. First you sneak out of the house because you're cooped up and then when you are allowed out you don't want to come! I know teenagers are rebellious but -"

"But none of them are like me, yeah, yeah," Danny interrupted, walking out of the kitchen carrying a huge potato salad.

"No, actually I was going to say that your brother rebels in a new kind of way. He doesn't want to come to the barbecue."

"What?" Danny turned to look at Jamie sharply, "Why not kid? It'll be fun!"

"Maybe later…" Jamie said hesitantly. "I'll come later if I feel up to it."

"Okay, well… feel better then kid."

Jamie waited for his family to leave the house. They had barely shut the door when Jamie was there in three strides and had it locked and bolted. He leaned against the door for the longest time trying to figure out what he should do. Steve Bachman was supposed to be on the run right? Why would he waste his time spying on Jamie when the whole of the NYPD are searching for him. He should be lying low. Jamie curled up on the sofa and tried to watch TV to take his mind of stuff. The only decent thing to watch was Scream, but somehow it just freaked him out even more. If Steve Bachman was stalking the house then why the hell was he staying in there alone? He couldn't fight him off without his father or brothers! Jamie grabbed his coat and headed outside before it got too dark.

He was grateful to escape into the fresh air. The whole neighbourhood was amidst the festivities and were waiting for the fireworks which always used to be a great source of excitement for Jamie when he was younger. Now… he didn't know what he wanted. As he watched people running from one house to another, only then did he realize how disconnected he was from all these people. Only just a few months ago he was one of those people, now he felt like a ghost gliding down the street in a world where he didn't feel like he belonged.

Jamie meandered his way through a throng of people huddled along the driveway leading up to the Schneider's backyard. He nervously wrapped his arms around himself in comfort as he gazed around the yard, watching all the people enjoying themselves. Danny spotted him and waved him over eagerly. Jamie stretched his lips into a thin smile and made his way over to them.

"Hey there he is!" Henry said jovially.

"Finally!" Erin grinned, looping her free arm around her brother while her other hand clutched a plate of food. Jamie's stomach rumbled, he didn't realize how hungry he was. "Ma said you weren't going to come."

"I was going crazy just sitting around in the house…" Jamie trailed off, his heart suddenly started thumping and he had a lump which had risen in his throat as he witnessed something which was like a punch in the stomach. Jamie almost doubled over in pain, he was so shocked. "What the…?"

"Do you want something to eat?" Erin asked her brother in concern. But he wasn't listening. All his attention was focused solely on the couple at the grill, his jaw ticking in anger.

"Jamie?" Danny followed his brother's gaze, his eyes darkening when he saw who Jamie was glaring at. "That son of a bitch! Does Josh know about this?"

"I'm going to go and talk some sense into her," Jamie said quietly, his voice shaking with suppressed anger.

"I'm sure people have already tried," Joe said softly, placing a firm hand on his brother and trying to hold him back before he did something he might regret. "You won't get anywhere."

"Oh yeah? We'll see about that," Jamie snarled, shrugging Joe's hand off.

"Jamie don't-" Joe started to say but Frank placed his hand on Joe's shoulder.

"Just…let him get it out," He said in a grave voice.

Jamie strolled straight towards the couple at the barbecue, his face set like stone. They stopped their laughing when they saw him approaching.

"Hungry huh?" Jamie purred in a low voice to Kelli who had her arms wrapped around Rick Caine. He very pointedly ignored Rick, his stomach churning with betrayal and a newfound hatred. "I -I need to talk to you."

"Okay sure," She replied in hesitation, slightly alarmed by Jamie's perturbed expression. "I'll be right back," She said casually to Rick Caine.

"Sure, take your time hon," Rick said sweetly, giving Jamie a sly wink. Jamie's hands curled into fists and he dragged Kelli away to the side so he could talk to her before he punched Rick again.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Jamie gasped in fury.

"Well – what does it look like I'm doing?" Kelli retorted.

"Rick Caine? You dumped Josh for Rick Caine?" Jamie quizzed, his face contorted with disgust.

"Jamie I know how this looks, but – please try to understand." Kelli begged.

"First of all are you deaf?" Jamie spat, "Didn't you hear what he said to me at Kenny's party the other night?"

"Look, I've just been through all of this with Zoe and Dean!" Kelli replied in irritation.

"And second of all," Jamie continued in a low growl, "Have you forgotten what he did to Josh?"

"That was a long time ago, Josh said so himself!" Kelli defended.

"Oh bullshit!" Jamie snapped, "It wasn't that long ago it was last year! I'd like to hear Josh say that when he sees you two now…"

Kelli guiltily looked away. Jamie's eyes widened, "You – you mean he doesn't know?"

"Not yet. I'm working up the courage to tell him. I do still care about him I don't want him to get hurt!"

"Yeah," Jamie sneered, "It really looked like you were concerned about his happiness when you had your tongue down his arch nemesis throat a few minutes ago."

Kelli's face flushed. "I don't feel all that great about what happened between Josh and me!" she said defiantly, "But – sometimes an event – it either brings you closer as a couple or drives you apart! It did with you and Zoe and it put you in the nuthouse! Dean's high most of the time, Josh acts like he doesn't care but I know it's killing him that he left you alone in the mall! There's only so much of the guilt I can take! I was so upset after I broke up with Josh I cried for ages – and then Rick came along…"

"To what? Sweep you off your feet? Kiss you and wake you up from a deep sleep?" Jamie scoffed. "Open your eyes Kelli! He humiliated me!"

"I know," Kelli looked at the floor in shame.

"In front of everyone!" Jamie added in resentment. "And he still beat Josh up– we were fifteen!"

"I know and I'm sorry about that but - but that's just the way he is!" Kelli stammered. "Besides, you shouldn't have started that rumour about him…"

Jamie gaped at her. "I can't believe I'm hearing this! How could you do this to us? To Josh?"

"I am a human being," Kelli responded, her eyes glittering with unshed tears, "And I don't feel proud about it but that's just the way it has to be. I forgive him for what he's done."

"Oh, how nice for you to be able to forgive and forget so easily like that. You can't even see it can you?" Jamie shot back, "He gave us hell for years! But as long as you two are happy then the rest of us can go and burn in hell for all you care!"

"You know that's not true! It wasn't even planned," Kelli whispered, "I was alone, and I was crying and – and he was there… then he kissed me and I felt so much better -"

"So that's it huh?" Jamie's voice quivered with rage. "He's just so good in the sack you can't say no?"

"What?" Kelli stared at Jamie in incomprehension.

Jamie shrugged, "Well it must be something like that if you're willing to turn your back on your own friends!"

"I'm not turning my back on you guys!" Kelli stated hotly.

"Well it looks that way to me." Jamie countered, in a voice filled with satisfied bitterness.

"Something bad happened to you, and I'm really sorry about it!" Kelli said with vehemence. "But I can't spend the rest of my life paying for it! We are together now, whether you, Zoe, Dean or even Josh like it or not!"

"You're pathetic!" Jamie rasped.

"Think what you want to think!" Kelli replied angrily, folding her arms.

Jamie pursed his lips to stop the flow of obscenities that were going to tumble out of his mouth at any second. Instead he just swallowed his words and said in the driest voice, "Fine…Run back to him then."

Kelli eyed him suspiciously, "What are you going to do?"

Jamie glanced around at his family who were all bunched together under a large tree, watching them fight. Danny had on one of his frowns as he observed their body language.

Jamie turned back to Kelli, shook his head and said in a deadly serious voice, "That's it. You and me. Over."

"Oh, don't be so dramatic!" Kelli huffed, "I'm one of your oldest friends, we go way back – I'm practically like your sister!"

"You don't need to tell me," Jamie said curtly, "I already know, that's why it hurts so much to see you with him of all people. And you know it too. You turn your back on me, it's like turning your back on your own family. It's him or us."

"Jamie!"

"I mean it," Jamie warned.

Kelli snorted, "No you don't!"

"Choose!" Jamie hissed through clenched teeth.

Kelli stared at him with wide, hurt eyes. Then she turned her back on him and scuttled off to Rick. If it hadn't have been for Danny's hand which slammed onto his shoulder he would've gone tearing off after Rick and torn every limb from his body.

"Just let it go little brother," Danny whispered in his ear as they stared at Kelli and Rick at the barbecue, "This one's gonna hurt for a long time but be thankful it wasn't your girl. Be thankful it wasn't Zoe."

"Zoe's not – I mean – she wouldn't – but then I didn't think Kelli…" Jamie stuttered, he was still in shock. He just couldn't believe that this could happen now of all times.

"I know kid," Danny said in understanding. "But…remember - people change."

"Yeah but Kelli!" Jamie just couldn't let this one go, "Rick…" Jamie drew a deep breath and tried to gain some control of his raging emotions. "I – I need to get away from here…"

"Come on Jamie," Frank said gently, sidling up behind him, "We'll walk you home."

"Why am I embarrassing you Dad?" Jamie barked, storming off out of the yard and continuing down the street to his house, still cursing.

How in God's name did he not see this one coming? He'd been so damned preoccupied with his recovery and Steve Bachman that he had completely overlooked his own friends and how they were dealing with this. Of course they'd had their own pain to cope with but his Kelli and Josh were two of his best friends and now they had split up because Josh was too overwhelmed with guilt. Jamie felt an uncomfortable pang in his stomach as he remembered that he was the one who had sent Josh out of the store in the first place. But if he hadn't then Josh might've been the one who had got himself killed instead of Jared. And to pour more salt over the open wounds, Kelli had to go and hook up with the worst possible person in the world – other than Steve Bachman of course, Rick Caine who was second on the list. She knew - she knew how they felt about him!

Jamie violently kicked his front door several times to vent out all the newfound pent up anger he had bottled inside him. Why did this have to happen now? Things were on the cusp of recovering and then life just turns to shit all over again.

Jamie traipsed back up to his room, feeling that this was definitely the worst Fourth of July he'd ever experienced. He passed the time by sitting upright on his bed, scribbling violent drawings of Rick Caine getting smashed by a piano, eaten by a shark or mauled by a bear, all the while listening to Eminem, the music of anger.

Jamie was so busy sketching away; he didn't hear the shuffle downstairs. It was only when the fireworks started up outside, he eased his headphones off, sauntered to the window and pressed his forehead against the cool glass, watching the colourful sparks gracing the night sky, wishing he too could just… explode into a million pieces and disappear.

A door slammed downstairs suddenly bringing Jamie's attention back. He whipped round, still kneeling on his window seat. With a frown he wandered slowly out of his room and onto the landing, his heart thumping.

"Hello?" He called out in hesitation. "Danny? Joe? Is – is that you?"

No answer. The front door was shut. That's a good thing right?

"Ma? Dad?"

Still no answer.

Jamie swallowed and continued to inch further down the stairs, creeping across the hallway. He peered into the living room. "Erin? Johnny? Grandpa?" Jamie called, starting to panic. He felt a cool breeze flit across the nape of his neck, it was coming from the kitchen. Jamie padded into the kitchen and gasped – the back door was open!

Jamie tripped over his feet in his haste to shut the door. Barely had the lock clicked when the door behind him slammed shut. Jamie jumped as though he'd been electrocuted and stumbled around. Standing face to face with him was the person, who had been the subjective focus of his nightmares for months, the person who had put him through hell and turned his world upside down, the person who was supposed to be on the run from the whole city and was now standing in his kitchen grinning evilly at him.

"Hi Jamie. What, no hug?"

Jamie grabbed onto the counter for support as his knees turned to water, he stared wide eyed at Bachman, confused and horrified. "How – how the hell did you get in here?"

"Funny story," Bachman replied casually, his grin growing wider, "I've been watching your house for months, waiting for you to be here alone. And luckily tonight... I got my wish."

Bachman started pacing around the kitchen like a caged animal, all the while Jamie kept his eyes to him, never turning his back on him. At least he wasn't holding his rifle. Jamie took comfort in that. "You know Jamie… all week I've had this ache in my gut – right here!" He stabbed at his stomach with his fist, his face contorted with anger. "I don't like it when people betray me. You know that."

"Yeah I do," Jamie whispered furiously, "But I'm not that same kid I was two months ago. You can't threaten me anymore Steve!"

Bachman's eyes widened, "Oh you know my name?" Then with one angry swipe of his arm he wiped all the dishes off the counter. Jamie darted behind a chair and glared at Bachman.

"You deceived me," Bachman seethed, continuing to pace manically back and forth, Jamie's hands gripped on tightly to the chair which now acted as a barrier between them. "You've betrayed me Jamie. You see – I thought I could lay low, start again. But then what happens? You go and spill my big secret – and the one thing I didn't want to happen…. Well, it happened if you know what I'm saying."

"You killed Jared," Jamie hissed, "You outta pay for what you did! You had no right to make me keep that secret!"

"Oh didn't I?" Bachman suddenly lunged forward so his face was right up close to Jamie's, his knees leaning against the chair. "I know what you're trying to make me do – you're trying to get me amped up so I finish you off here and now, aren't you? And then the family walk in and see me standing over you and big brother ambushes me? Nice try, but I'm one step ahead of you!"

"How - how do you know about -?"

"Your brothers? I know everything." Bachman smirked, "You're not gonna get away from this. You betrayed me and I punish easily. But you already know that."

Jamie couldn't take it any longer, he had to do something. His eyes darted towards the door but Bachman spotted him, they locked eyes for a split second and then started scrambling towards the back door. Bachman beat Jamie to it, slamming it shut and guarding it with his body.

"I'm not going anywhere and neither are you?" Bachman said with vehemence. "Come on Jamie, take it like a man -"

Jamie tried to make a swift run for it but Bachman grabbed him by the throat and forced him back, Jamie faltered over some broken dishes on the floor as he was pummelled against the wall, Bachman's fingers wrapped firmly against his windpipe.

"I – can't – br – breathe…Let – me – go…" Jamie choked, his eyes leaking.

Bachman just tightened his grip, leaning into Jamie's ear and whispering, "Let you go? But we're having so much fun, I'm just getting started…"

Jamie's eyes frantically searched for some saviour weapon, anything he could use… please… and then he found it, only a few centimetres away, just lying amongst the pile on the counter near the sink – the frying pan. Now he just needed to get to it.

"Did you ever think you could get rid of me? Huh? Did you ever think that you could make me just disappear?" Bachman breathed. Jamie's fingers were subtly creeping along the sink for the frying pan handle.

"Oh I've been planning for weeks, what I'm gonna do to you, Jamie Reagan…" Bachman threatened with a menacing smile, "And let me tell you it's a real page turner! I'm gonna make you an example – show your family that they can't screw with me! You pissed me off boy, and sooner or later you're gonna pay."

Jamie's fingers crawled across some dishes, reaching for the handle… come on…come on… found it! He pinched the handle using two of his fingers and dragged it towards him carefully.

"First, I'm gonna tie you up to that chair over there," Bachman growled, his breath hot on Jamie's face, his hand still wrenching his throat. Jamie could feel the pan handle beneath his fingertips, he knew what he had to do. "And then I'm gonna stick my gun so far up your -"

Jamie lifted his leg and kneed Bachman right in between his legs as hard as he could. Bachman grunted in pain and surprise. Jamie wasted no time, he grabbed the frying pan and swung it at Bachman's head. Jamie gripped both hands on the frying pan and held it in front of him like a sword, ready to strike back. Bachman stumbled back into the table, clutching his head, he looked at his hand, it was covered with blood. Jamie's eyes widened in shock, he didn't know he'd hit him that hard.

Bachman let out a cry of rage and charged at Jamie, but Jamie was ready for him, he swung the pan against his head again, harder this time. Bachman crumbled to his knees at the force of the blow, Jamie whacked him over the head again. Bachman was down but that didn't stop Jamie, he had to make sure… he slammed the pan down on his head once more.

Bachman wasn't moving. The fireworks continued to explode like thunder outside.

Jamie stared at his body in front of him, the body in his kitchen. He caught sight of his reflection in the oven, standing above the body with a frying pan held out in front of him.

Oh God...

What had he done… he'd killed a man…


	20. Chapter 20  We Are The Law

**Author's Note: ** Hey guys, sorry it's been so long, it's just a week goes by soooo quick! Uni's been piling on the work but of course I'm gonna continue this story... anyways... thanks for all the reviews it was comforting especially after the week I had last week (not good) As I said, you guys are great support, so keep reading and reviewing! This chapter is the aftermath...

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><p><strong>Chapter 20 – We Are The Law<strong>

Jamie's hands were shaking so much he couldn't keep hold of the frying pan, it slipped through his fingers and fell to the floor with a loud clang. He didn't bother to pick it up, he was in shock at what he'd just done. Jamie tentatively nudged Bachman with his foot to check if he was still alive. But he didn't move. He was definitely dead.

Oh shit….

Jamie heard the front door open followed by a flurry of voices. He quickly edged out of the kitchen and shut the door firmly behind him. Joe and Erin staggered into the living room, supporting Johnny who was groaning in agony.

"Winner and still champion!" Danny announced cheerfully, slamming the door shut, a bottle of beer still clasped in his hand.

"You shouldn't have tried to drink him under the table!" Erin scolded as she and Joe laid her husband to sleep carefully on the couch.

"I can still drink another bottle!" Johnny slurred into the cushion.

"Aah, he was asking for it," Danny said dismissively, he spotted Jamie loitering near the kitchen, "Hey little bro, you okay?"

Jamie couldn't face them, any of them, he charged into the dining room and leaned against the chair for support. He took deep breaths to control himself.

Danny glanced at Joe and they quickly headed after him.

"Hey kid what's wrong?" Danny asked gently. Jamie continued to tremble silently. "You're shaking like a leaf!"

"Is this cause of Rick Caine?"

"I've – I've killed him…" Jamie said absently.

Danny frowned, "Rick?"

"No! Bachman!" Jamie choked, "I've killed Bachman."

"What are you talking about?" Joe asked in confusion, Jamie's mental state clearly wasn't stable right now. "What do you mean you've killed Bachman?"

"He – he was here Joe! Just a few minutes ago, I heard him break in – I thought it was you guys – so I – I went and…. He was in the kitchen and then he attacked me -" Jamie gasped.

"Bachman was here?" Danny growled, all his defences suddenly thrown up, "He came into this house and attacked you?"

"Yeah, he - he – he had me by the throat and I didn't know what else I was supposed to do!" Jamie sobbed, "He was threatening to torture me – I found a way out – I picked up a frying pan and I smacked him over the head with it!"

"What's going on?" Erin asked sharply, entering the dining room to find both Joe and Danny supporting an upset Jamie from either side.

"Uh…Jamie's just said he's hit Bachman." Joe explained in a daze.

"Hit him!"

"Yeah just now."

"How do you know it was Bachman?" Erin asked in a shaken voice. "You don't know even know what he looks like."

"Erin!" Joe exclaimed in disbelief, "I'm sure he must've sussed it out when he had him by the throat!"

"I know what he looks like. I've seen his face." Jamie admitted.

Everyone slipped into tense silence. Danny continued to look doubtful.

"How badly hurt is he?" He asked quietly.

"I told you, I've k - killed him!" Jamie moaned shakily through his tears.

"Are you sure?" Danny countered with scepticism.

"Yes! There's – there's blood all over the floor!"

Danny still looked unconvinced.

"Did you look properly?" He grilled.

"Yes…"

"Check his pulse -?"

"Danny!" Jamie turned to face him with bloodshot eyes, "I didn't need to check his pulse. He's not moving or breathing – he's dead!"

Jamie couldn't stand up any longer, he slumped into a chair before his knees gave way. Danny sat down next to him, Erin on his other side, rubbing his arm in support. Joe grabbed their father's bottle of scotch and started pouring it into glasses as he sat opposite his brother. All of them clustered around the end of the dining table.

"We need to call the police," Erin stated resolutely.

"Who else knows about this kid?" Danny whispered to Jamie.

"Huh?"

"Did you open the door to anyone else before we came in or did you tell anyone else besides us, did you call anyone for help, in a moment of panic?" Danny interrogated with patience.

"No."

Danny narrowed his eyes and then nodded slowly, "Okay… So, we're the only ones that know?"

"Yeah."

"What's that got to do with anything?" Erin said cuttingly to Danny. Then she turned to Jamie and said softly, "We've got to call the police now."

"And then what?" Danny interjected in mock amusement.

"Tell them what happened." Erin replied with uneasiness.

"What? That Jamie hammered Bachman's brains to pieces with a frying pan?" Danny said sardonically, "Do me a favour Erin!"

"It was self- defence, he said so himself!" Erin retorted smartly.

Danny scoffed, "Yeah, you really think they're gonna believe that?" He stood up and started pacing.

"Well it's the truth!" Erin said hotly. "Look Jamie, I think the police know by now, what's happened to you – and with Bachman's history, they'll understand."

"Are you stupid or what?" Danny chastised in a hushed voice, "He whacked his head in over and over again!" He pointed at Jamie, "They could get him on a charge for attempted murder! That's what your beloved justice system is all about, it doesn't matter who the person is, murder is murder and all that jazz! Bachman was in our kitchen, Jamie used our frying pan and hit him more than once-"

"There's not a court in the world that will convict Jamie of that when they know about Bachman!" Erin argued fiercely.

"We can't take that risk!" Danny said, his eyes flashing dangerously.

"So what are you trying to say?" Erin quizzed.

"Exactly that."

"What?"

Danny was at loss for what he wanted to say, he couldn't think straight, "I – I don't know -"

"No come on tell me!" Erin stood up so she was eye to eye with him, "If we're not going to call the police then what are we gonna do?"

"I – We just need to-"

"Dump the body." Came Joe's quiet reply from the corner of the table.

Jamie continued to rock back and forth in his chair, Erin and Danny's heads snapped towards Joe who was staring into his half-empty glass.

"What did you just say?" Erin gaped at him in sheer incredulity.

"You heard me," Joe muttered, tracing the glass with his fingertips. "No one knows he was here. Dump him."

"Have you two gone completely mad?" Erin said in frustration.

Danny held his hands up in defence, looking just as perplexed as his sister, "Hey, I wasn't the one that just said that!" He pointed accusingly at Joe.

"Joe, you cannot just dump a body- especially not a fugitive's!" Erin hissed.

"No? Why not?" Joe asked calmly, still not looking at them.

Erin snorted, "You – you just can't!"

Joe flicked his eyes towards her, "Why not?" He pressed.

"Because it's wrong – because – because someone will see!" she stammered.

Joe raised his eyebrow and turned back to his drink, "Who?"

"Anyone could – Ma and Dad are probably on their way back home right now!"

Joe shrugged, "We don't know that."

"It's against the law Joe!" Erin rebuked pointedly.

Joe slammed his glass down and stood up to face Erin, "The law?" He spat, "Screw the law, we don't need the law, we are the law! Danny's right. If we call the police now, there's a possible chance that Jamie could get in trouble and we can't risk it!"

The three of them huddled together at the side to watch Jamie who was nervously nibbling on the sleeve of his sweatshirt. What had he done?

"You don't know that!" Erin counteracted faintly.

"Well what do you think's gonna happen huh?" Joe murmured through clenched teeth, "Okay, fine, Bachman was a psycho, he broke into the house and attacked Jamie, so he retaliated in self-defence. But you know as well as I do that one hit wouldn't have been enough to see him go down like that, Jamie hit him until he made sure that he was dead, that – counts as attempted murder!"

"Joe, I'll make sure they know the ins and outs of everything!" Erin promised, "We already have all the stuff prepared for Bachman's upcoming trial – now it can be used -"

"For what, when our brother's put in the defence instead of the witness box?" Danny interrupted in disgust, "He could barely handle testifying against Bachman, this will finish him and no way are we prepared to let that happen!"

"Danny it's up to the law to decide! Now John and I know a lot of good defence attorney's that could argue Jamie's case!" Erin said with determination.

"You can't put him on the stand!" Joe ridiculed.

"Why not?"

"Look at him, poor kid, you couldn't find anyone easier to tear apart! Jamie's not a cop yet, he doesn't get the special IA treatment or the licence to kill like us."

Jamie started shaking, Danny was by his side in an instant, "Hey kid, you okay?"

"You're all talking about me like I'm not even here," Jamie said in a quivering voice.

Danny placed a reassuring arm around his kid brother, "Nah, we're just worried about you kid that's all."

"Come on – let's just call 911 and get it over with," Erin sniffed.

"Erin, why don't you get your head out of the clouds for a minute?" Joe barked, "This isn't just about the law, what about the media? They don't know him, they don't care about him! I can just see the headline now –'The King's Plaza Sniper Found Dead In The Kitchen Of One Of His Victims, His Head Smashed In With A Frying Pan!' Not to mention the fact that he's a Reagan, ex-Commissioner's grandson and a respected Lieutenant's son -our brother!"

The front door slammed shut, they all jumped. Frank whistled as he walked into the living room.

"It's Dad," Joe gulped.

"Good, he can decide," Erin said quietly.

"No, no, no I don't want him involved!" Joe said firmly. "He'll tell us to forget it and call the police."

"Of course he will!"

"Is anyone home?" Frank called out jovially.

"And then he'll be implicated too!" Joe added with apprehension, "Danny, take him back to the Schneider's and keep him there, all of them until we -"

"Erin? Are you home?"

"No you do it, I'm gonna sort this out!" Danny argued, his arm still snaked protectively around Jamie.

"Joe are you here?"

"No way -!"

"Danny? Jamie?"

"That's the way it's gonna be and that's that!" Danny ordered, at the same time Frank walked in.

"Oh here you are, what are you doing over here, the barbecue's still in full swing over there!" Frank said happily.

"We came to take John home, he wasn't feeling well," Erin said, trying to disguise the discomfort in her voice.

"Shame," Frank said, his tone indicating otherwise.

"Come on Dad, let's – let's get back over there," Joe said nervously tugging at his father's arm.

"But I've just come from there," Frank said in confusion. "Your grandfather's certainly enjoying himself- and those fireworks!"

"You're drunk aren't you?" Danny said suspiciously.

"I'm just a little bit tipsy! But it's Fourth of July – that's okay right?"

"Yeah which is why we should get back over there while the night is still young!" Joe tried to grin.

Jamie hurriedly wiped his eyes, Frank frowned and sauntered over to his son, sensing something was wrong. Danny tensed up, his arm tightening around his brother, warning him not to say anything. "Jamie, are you all right? You've been crying, what's wrong?"

Jamie couldn't keep it in, "I –um, It's – it's!"

"It's Caine!" Danny interrupted quickly.

"What's he done now?" Frank thundered.

"Dad I have some…" Jamie tried to say but Danny squeezed his shoulder.

"Nothing much, he's just trying to rub Jamie's face the whole Kelli thing," Danny said indifferently. "Look Dad – um – just leave him, he's a bit upset over it, he doesn't wanna talk about it."

"I've got a good mind to go over there right now and give that boy a good thrashing!" Frank threatened.

"Yeah well you're a little worse for wear now aren't you Dad?" Danny said cynically, "Besides, now's not really a good time. Why don't you take Joe up on his offer and go back to the Schneider's, you should be with Ma tonight. Erin and I can look after Jamie."

"Yeah, I'm missing out on all the fireworks and I want some more to drink, let's go," Joe said swiftly, trying to usher his father out the door.

"Fine, maybe just the one drink then," Frank called back as Joe shoved him out of the house.

As soon as they had left Erin pulled out the chair next to Danny, "Right, can we stop messing around and call the police now?"

"Why would we want to do that?" Danny stared incredulously at his sister.

"Well Joe's gone so we can stop pretending like we're the Sopranos." Erin sneered.

"We're not pretending anything!" Danny said unresponsively.

"Excuse me?"

"Joe's right." Danny nodded, "We're gonna dump Bachman's body. No one knows he was here, he came over to kill Jamie so screw him."

Jamie sat there in a trance, listening to his brother and sister argue back and forth. Danny started pacing again, Jamie could tell he was trying to keep it together. Erin on the other hand, wouldn't let it drop.

"Danny, for God's sake he's killed him!" She stated for the tenth time, "It's not up to us to decide what happens!"

"Who then? The police? The courts? The media? They won't care about details Erin, all they'll see is one big juicy story right in front of them and they'll lap it up like dogs! All of them!" Danny shouted.

"So what are you saying, you and me chop Bachman up into pieces using the mini-chop and then shove him down the food processor?" Erin mocked.

"Don't be so stupid!" Danny snapped, seating himself down next to Jamie again.

"No come on, what are you saying?" Erin challenged.

"I don't know!" Danny yelled.

"You don't know?" Erin repeated in a high-pitched voice, sitting down opposite her brother and glaring at him.

"No. I -I gotta think for a second…" Danny mumbled, his fingers strumming the table in agitation.

"Yeah well don't take too long because Ma and Dad'll be home soon!" Erin said fearfully.

Danny ignored her and turned to his brother, "Where is he kid?"

"Who..,?"

"Bachman!"

"Kitchen," Jamie answered blandly.

"Is there a lot of blood?" Danny breathed.

Jamie couldn't think straight, he couldn't piece the memories together in his head. "Uh, blood…?"

"He's on the floor right?" Danny said forcibly.

But Jamie couldn't listen to him, all he could think about was the body on the kitchen floor. "I – I can't believe I've killed someone!"

"Danny look at him, this is never going to work!" Erin cried out in worry. "You can see that -!"

"Look, this is our brother and I'm not going to sit back and watch him suffer another breakdown because of that scumbag!" Danny roared. "Do you understand?"

"He's killed him!" Erin screamed.

"Yeah but Bachman would've done the same thing to him. Jamie said so himself that he had him by the throat and was beating him up and smacking him around. Do you really think Jamie would've hurt him if he didn't have to?" Danny asked vigorously.

"I don't know!" Erin answered vehemently. "But I do know that there's a body in our kitchen! Our kitchen!"

"I'm sorry!" Jamie whimpered. "I didn't mean to do it, I swear!"

"No, no it's not your fault kid," Danny said inflexibly, shooting his sister a filthy look, "You didn't have a choice. If it were me I would've done the exact same thing except I would've made sure the pan was still hot before I hit him with it!"

"I'm not – saying it's your fault Jamie," Erin said in a fragile voice, "It's just – that's our kitchen. Even if we do clean it up, we're always gonna know what happened in there!"

"So what?" Danny said in an irksome manner, "Ma's getting the kitchen re-done anyway isn't she?"

"Yeah…I guess she is…."

"Right so that's that then. We're gonna clean up the kitchen and – then we're gonna put Bachman in the car." Danny said, trying to seize control of the situation but Jamie could tell he was nervous as hell.

"Who's car?"

"I don't know… Dad's?" Danny replied uninterestedly.

"Don't you think he might notice its missing?" Erin responded in a voice laced with irritation.

"Fine! We'll take Joe's." Danny huffed.

"And what are we gonna put him in?"

"I – I don't know, we just need – something – a- a rug or a- a duvet – a duvet!" Danny clicked his fingers, "We'll wrap him up nice and tight in a duvet, take him into the woods and bury him!"

"I can't believe we're even talking about this!" Erin poured herself a large measure of scotch into Joe's abandoned glass.

"Jamie, you wait here," Danny ordered tenderly. He tried to stand up but Jamie grabbed him by the arm and forced him back down.

"What are you gonna do?" Jamie asked in a terrified voice.

"I'm gonna help you!" Danny explained emphatically, "We're gonna get rid of him."

It was almost like Jamie had slipped out of whatever state of catatonia he was in. "No. No. You – you can't do that."

"We don't have any other choice, it's already been decided," Danny responded in a tight voice.

"You can't just decide something like that without asking me first!" Jamie shot back, "I'm the one who did it! I'm gonna go to the police right now and tell them -" Jamie tried to get up but it was Danny who pulled him back down.

"Tell em what?" He asked intently. "What exactly are you gonna say to them?"

"I'm gonna tell them that it was self-defence! He came for me!"

"Jamie, you smashed his skull in over and over again with a frying pan," Danny pointed out very slowly.

"Yeah but – he – he was trying to strangle me! He was gonna kill me!" Jamie rocked back and forth in his chair.

"But he didn't did he?" Danny asked tersely.

"No, because I stopped him!"

"Exactly!" Danny slammed his hand on the table in agreement. "He was a sick, sick excuse of a human being but it's over now! He can't hurt you anymore because you stopped – and well – if this is the only way we can get rid of him for good then fine…"

Erin gaped at him.

Danny stood up and started pacing again, anxiously raking his fingers through his hair, "Okay… now Erin and I are gonna take care of this for you. We're gonna dump his body far away, so no one can find out. Jamie?"

Jamie just sat there, totally numb to the bone with shock.

"Jamie are you listening to me?" Danny shouted desperately.

"Yes," Jamie replied in a meek voice, "I'm- I'm listening to you."

"Right, Erin come on let's do this!" Danny started to walk out but Erin held him back.

"Question. When we wrap up Bachman where exactly are we gonna dump him?"

"I don't know - we'll find a place!" Danny answered in a tight voice. "Now can we just do this? We're running out of time!"

"Fine, let's just get this over with." Erin stood up and turned to Jamie, "Wait here. We'll be… just wait here." She left the dining room with Danny.

She can't even look at me, Jamie thought with a stab of misery. He buried his head in his arms and tried to block out the terrifying images which violated his memory. Bachman in the kitchen, Bachman with his hand around his throat, Bachman on the floor with blood spilling out of his head -

"JAMIE GET IN HERE NOW!"

Jamie's head snapped up at the sound of Erin's panicked scream. Was it Bachman? What happened? Jamie was up and out of that chair like a shot, he pushed through Danny and Erin who were stood shoulder to shoulder in the doorway of the kitchen staring at the floor.

"What's going on – why aren't you…." Jamie stumbled backwards; Danny tried to support him upright. "How? I don't understand!"

The three siblings stared hard at the floor trying to find some logic as to why there was a pool of blood all over the floor and no body to accompany it.

No one needed to say it.

They all knew it.

Steve Bachman had escaped again.

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><p>To be Continued...<p> 


	21. Chapter 21  I See Red

**Author's Note: **I know it's been a long time but well, Uni's been giving me hell, hell in terms of assignments so I've been trying to write this in the morsel of free time I have left. That's why this chapter is so short but I promise that once the storm of work has let up, I'll be plain sailing with the story again! Shouldn't be long though. Keep on reading and reviewing cuz you guys are great! Also, I know some people had a few uh, issues with the last chapter which is understandable but that's why there's this chapter. After the initial shock has worn off, they'll start to see things more clearly, or at least Jamie does.

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><p><strong>Chapter 21 – I See Red<strong>

Jamie half-collapsed against Danny, who tried to support him. "I don't – what is going on here?" he asked his big brother in exasperation.

"I thought you said he was dead kid," Danny said quietly, still holding onto a trembling Jamie.

"I thought he was!"

"Danny…" Erin was staring fearfully at him, "What are we going to do?"

Danny's eyes swept over the kitchen, assessing everything, from the blood pooling the floor, to the bloody fingerprints smeared all over the kitchen counter and the back door.

"Danny what are we gonna do?" Erin repeated aggressively.

"I'll tell you what we're gonna do," Danny released Jamie who fell against the door frame, watching Danny close the door with his foot and then proceeding to ferret around in the cupboards for the cleaning stuff.

"What are you doing?" Erin gasped.

"I'm gonna bake a cake, what does it look like I'm doing Erin?" Danny snapped, frantically unpacking the cleaning stuff, "I'm gonna get this kitchen cleaned up before Ma and Dad gets home and you're gonna help me! Now grab some gloves and let's get scrubbin!"

"Danny -!"

"Now!"

"Stop!" Jamie yelled suddenly.

Erin and Danny froze. They stared at their brother.

"Jamie?"

"Just – don't clean up. Don't touch anything. Don't get rid of the evidence. Don't pretend like this isn't happening." Jamie staggered towards the chair and dropped onto it. "Erin you were right. Let's tell Dad. Let's call the police. Let's deal with this like the professionals we're supposed to be."

"But Jamie this isn't -" Danny moved towards him cautiously but Jamie halted him with his hand.

"Please. Don't say anything to change my mind Danny. My mind is already made up."

"But we don't know what's gonna happen to you." Danny said in a voice tinged with desperation. "They could think you acted out of craziness – they could take you away from us again. God…they could put you back into hospital! Kid you just gotta ask yourself this - do you want to go back to Corbel? Do you?"

Jamie involuntarily shuddered at the thought, "I don't. Of course I don't." He forced himself to say. "But I don't want any more lying or secrets. It was keeping things a secret that put me in there in the first place remember?"

Danny and Erin fired a quick glance at each other as they remembered Danny's exact words a few days ago.

"He's not dead," Jamie continued in a voice filled with despair, "So… I guess... I have nothing to worry about in terms of attempted murder. Besides, all this, what we're doing, covering it up…it's not who we are."

"I don't care about that," Danny said in a thin voice, "I care about you and what happens to you if this ever gets out. You have no idea how much trouble the press can cause for you Jamie, if you thought things were bad before, just wait and see what happens when they find out about this."

"I can handle them Danny," Jamie responded in a tired voice.

"You can't!"

"I've handled being strapped down to my bed nearly every night, I think I can handle a few asshole reporters!" Jamie protested, feeling his vulnerability being exposed more and more with every passing second, "But I can only get through it if I have your support."

Danny felt his heart twinge as he stared at his little brother. What was he supposed to do?

"Do I have your support?" Jamie asked directly at Danny.

Both brothers stared at each other meaningfully, overwhelmed by Jamie's decisiveness. Neither one wanted to back down. Then, very slowly, Danny nodded.

Erin sniffed, "You don't even have to ask!" She crossed the room in two strides and hugged her brother hard, "Of course we'll support you. Admit it," she threw Danny a sharp look, "You're way out of your depth here. We need Dad."

They heard the front door slam shut. Danny straightened up and Jamie immediately tensed in Erin's arms.

"Shh, it's okay, it's just Dad." Erin soothed, rocking Jamie back and forth like she used to when he was a child.

"Hey, everybody, what -" Joe walked into the kitchen and stopped in the doorway. He gaped, open mouthed at the sight of the blood all over the kitchen. He swore under his breath. "Guys? What the hell?"

Danny didn't answer, he just sunk into a chair, exhausted. Erin couldn't look at any of them.

"He's gone Joe," Jamie whimpered, still clutching onto Erin's arm. "Bachman. He wasn't dead like I thought he was. I guess I didn't hit him as hard as I – thought…"

"So… what's all this? Why are you just sitting here like ducks?" Joe's eyes narrowed as he looked at Danny who just stared back at him, stoically.

"Danny was gonna clean up the kitchen and then try and hunt Bachman down. I told him to just forget the whole thing. I'm gonna tell Dad the truth." Jamie replied firmly, "Where is he?"

"He's – he's upstairs, but Jamie wait!" Joe added hurriedly, as Jamie stood up, "Please just think about what could happen -"

"Not you too!" Jamie growled.

Joe grabbed him roughly by the shoulders, "Jamie listen to me now. If this gets out, stuff is gonna go down."

"Open your eyes! Stuff already has gone down!" Jamie bit back, shrugging himself out of Joe's grip.

"I'm talking about stuff which – we might not be able to control!"

"I don't – look, we've made it this far without the media finding out haven't we? What's – what's one more cover up?" Jamie stammered.

"Damn it, it's not about that!" Joe turned his livid gaze to Danny, "Oh please by all means just sit there!"

"What do you want me to do Joe?" Danny retorted angrily, "I was prepared to do what you asked, we both were. But then Jamie told us to leave it. He won't let us help! So we can't just ignore his wishes."

"Of course we can," Joe said through gritted teeth, "He's in a weird place right now – he's not thinking clearly. He's had a shock and – and – and this is only a way -"

"Joe we're cops, it's not what we do!" Jamie interrupted in a hushed voice. "I mean…" He threw Danny a sheepish look, "Danny I can understand but you… I thought you would be on my side with this one, just like you always are. What's wrong with you?"

Joe shifted uncomfortably, "It's just… I can see red here. I don't want you going back into Corbel. You told me you were never going to go back there again."

"I might not Joe!"

"We don't know that!" Joe paced the kitchen, treading over the blood spots carefully, "We don't know anything!"

"I know you guys are doing this for my protection but I have to grow up. We're talking about – possibly a lifetime running away from Bachman and that I just can't deal." Jamie said with some trepidation. "Face it. If he hadn't show up here tonight we wouldn't have been any closer to catching him than we have of pinning down a cloud and you know it."

Danny sighed in shame.

"And you think this is the easy way out do you?" Joe asked with a pained expression, "I know we're cops Jamie, I know that but – we're family first and – if it means that we need to – to – fine tune a few things which will help you then we'll do them! No questions asked!"

"I'm not questioning your loyalty to me!" Jamie said in irritation, "Do you honestly think I care about that right now. All I wanna do is go find Dad and tell him the truth. It'll break him …I know but -"

"Exactly! We'll find another way!" Joe interjected fiercely.

"Joe there is no other way!" Jamie glared him down, "Now are you made of human parts at all?"

"That's enough you two!" Danny suddenly barked. Jamie and Joe whipped round to face him. "Joe he's right. He's right." Danny heaved a sigh and rubbed his clean-shaven face, "We've been going at this all wrong."

Joe opened his mouth to argue but Erin silenced him with a look. He backed down in defeat.

"Kids are you here?" Frank's thundering yet cheerful voice drifted into the kitchen.

"Yeah we're – we're all here Dad!" Jamie called out in a shaking voice, his eyes never leaving Joe's.

They could hear Frank chuckling as he sauntered down the stairs. All four Reagan siblings wanted nothing more than for him to make everything better.

"Okay." Jamie said softly, steeling himself as their father's footsteps approached. "Here goes."

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><p>To Be Continued...<p> 


	22. Chapter 22  All Hell Breaks Loose

**Author's Note:**Well most of the work has let up for now so I've decided to take the tiny space of time I have left and write this next chapter. The idea just came to me this morning and I had to write it all down before I forget so tell me if you like it! Also, I loved the episode Black and Blue, I thought that Danny and Jamie working together was great!

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><p><strong>Chapter 22 – All Hell Breaks Loose<strong>

Jamie Reagan was a kid of values. He loved his brothers and he respected their deepest desires to protect him till the end of the earth. Hell he would've done the same thing if the roles were reversed. But they weren't. As he watched his father troop into the kitchen, Jamie could feel his limbs shaking in fear and exhaustion. All he had to do was to look at his father's face. From the moment he set foot into the kitchen, Frank's relaxed, slightly tipsy and cheerful face blossomed into shock and then trepidation.

"What happened in here?" Frank demanded sharply.

"Dad there's something we have to tell you," Erin said firmly, creeping up from behind Jamie and resting her hand on his shoulder.

"So I see," Frank responded in an icy voice. He stared at his three oldest who stood shoulder to shoulder behind his youngest. "What's going on?"

"It was Bachman," Jamie replied very quickly, "He broke in and showed up here and… we fought a little – a lot. Anyway he – he came at me and I had to hit him with something – I found a frying pan and I hit him with it. He went down so fast and there was blood everywhere, I thought for sure he was dead. I'm so sorry Dad."

Jamie shivered and pulled the sleeves of his sweatshirt around him tighter. Frank's eyes swept the room, his eyes widening at the sight of the blood smeared all over the kitchen. "Okay…" He said slowly, "So where is he now?"

"He escaped again Dad," Danny answered in a hushed voice, "We all thought he was dead and then he escaped, he escaped and got away again the bastard!" Danny kicked a chair in frustration.

Frank knew his children had many talents; fortunately lying to their father wasn't one of them. As he observed their minute hand gestures and guilty exchanges all it took was his many years of experience as a detective for all the pieces to fall into place. "Call this a wild guess but I'm thinking you four wanted to take matters into your own hands. That's why you wanted me out of the house tonight isn't it?" Frank confirmed, in a heavy voice.

"Yes," Jamie squeaked, "But I never meant to -"

"No Jamie you're not taking the fall for this. It was my idea Dad!" Joe interjected, "Whatever you're thinking – don't take it out on Jamie. It was my idea to dump the body and then clean up after it and do it all in secret. Jamie was in so much shock, he couldn't even speak poor kid. It's not his fault. I take full responsibility."

"Partial." Danny piped up. Everyone looked at him as he sauntered next to Joe, "I supported Joe's idea in keeping the truth from you and Ma even though Erin warned us not to. I'm just as much to blame."

"Yeah but I …still went along with it too." Erin sighed. "I was even going to help Danny clean up the kitchen but then Jamie called the whole thing off."

"Yeah he did," Danny added. "And a good thing too. He saved us. We would've rushed blindly into something we have no idea how to handle. We didn't tell you because we didn't want to worry you but now… Dad, we need your help."

Frank heaved another sigh, "Okay, first thing we need to do is call the cops. Don't touch anything."

"But, um, what's going to happen to me?" Jamie whispered with unease.

"You said Bachman attacked you and if that's the case -"

"What do you mean if?" Danny interrupted angrily.

Frank silenced him with a sharp look and then continued, "Then they'll agree it was self-defence. There's not a cop in the whole city who won't be on your side Jamie. You have to have faith in the system. Your brothers know that." He stared his eldest sons down, their eyes flickered to the floor in embarrassment. "However, I am impressed by the way you three pulled together to help your brother out, I shouldn't waste time reprimanding you. It takes a strong bond between siblings to work together like that. But Jamie - If you ever wanna be a cop, remember this, we work together as a force. Think of all the guys and girls in blue as your brothers and sisters. There is no I in team."

Frank's words rang clearly in Jamie's ears, he looked at his father graciously and nodded. Erin was the first one to break the thick silence.

"Okay so let's call them."

"I'll do it," Danny volunteered. He placed his hands on Jamie's shoulder and forced eye contact, "Just wait here okay kid?"

"Yeah," Jamie choked, leaning against the fridge, staring out the window.

Frank, Erin and Joe filed out of the kitchen with Danny close behind him. Whether it was instinct or coincidental, something forced Danny Reagan to turn around. He smiled encouragingly at his brother who stood fidgeting with his sweatshirt but the smile quickly vanished from his face, as he saw the tiny red dot dancing across Jamie's torso, bouncing up his neck, towards his face, his forehead... Danny's throat closed up tight, his chest contracting, heart thumping, eyes widening -

"JAMIE – GET DOWN!" Danny screamed.

The look on his big brother's face terrified Jamie, he didn't have time to comprehend what was happening as Danny lurched at him, tackling him to the floor.

BANG!

The shot burst through the window, glass chips shattering all over them in the exact spot where Jamie had been standing a split second before. Danny shielded Jamie protectively with his body, protecting him, his hand on his brother's head, keeping it down while he twisted his own around to assess the situation.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

The shots continued to fire through the window, glass shattering all over them.

"Danny! Jamie!" Erin came running into the kitchen, halting herself at the lip of the door.

BANG!

She shrieked and ducked as a few glass shards came hurtling towards her.

"ERIN DON'T COME IN! DON'T COME IN, STAY BACK! STAY BACK!" Danny shouted out.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

"DANNY WHAT'S GOING ON IN THERE?" Frank yelled, he crouched down next to Erin and held her tenderly.

BANG!

"BACHMAN!" Danny hollered back over the sound of the gunfire.

"WE GOTTA CALL 911 NOW!" Joe bellowed as he crawled towards Frank and Erin, he saw Danny and Jamie on the floor by the fridge. "DANNY WHERE IS HE?"

BANG! BANG!

"HE'S OUTSIDE, LISTEN JOE YOU GOTTA GO TELL MA TO STAY DOWN AND GET HER AWAY FROM THE WINDOWS!"

BANG! BANG! BANG!

"I'LL DO IT!" Erin answered in terror, sidling past Joe and Frank, eager to get to her mother.

BANG! BANG!

"AND CALL 911!" Joe called after her in panic.

Silence.

Danny, his hand still on Jamie's head, craned his neck to see his father and brother through the fog of smoke.

"Dad, Joe you okay?"

"We're both good!" Joe coughed, "You and Jamie okay?"

"Yeah, we're five by five bro." Danny joked.

"Has he stopped?" Jamie asked in a muffled voice.

"I don't think so - he's probably just loading up," Danny replied grimly, squinting towards the window which was now peppered with bullet holes.

"Danny!" Frank urgently called out to him, "We need to get you boys out of there and into the basement where he can't fire!"

Danny reluctantly let go of Jamie. "All right kid, you gotta stay down and crawl on your elbows over to Dad and Joe okay?"

Jamie nodded, trembling.

"It's okay kid, I'll be right behind you. Just don't get in view of the window." Danny clapped his brother's shoulder in reassurance. "Stay low."

Jamie unfolded onto the floor and slithered on his stomach towards the door, using his elbows to propel himself forward, just like Danny had instructed him to. He glanced up at the window, through the legs of the table.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

"Shit!" Jamie covered his head with his hands and pressed up against the table, hiding himself from the view of the window as plates and random objects in the kitchen started combusting all around him, pieces of Pyrex, wood and glass showering him.

"JAMIE DON'T MOVE!" Danny cried out in fear.

Jamie didn't need telling twice, he just lay on the floor, completely frozen. Danny watched his brother, desperate to help him. The shots stopped again and Danny wasted no time. He hopped over to his kid brother and nudged him with his elbow.

"Move it kid, come on!" Danny hissed.

Jamie scrambled towards the door, grasping Joe's outstretched hand. Danny grabbed onto Frank's and they all inched out of the kitchen. Joe shut the door behind them. The sound of hushed voices and padding footfalls on the stairs brought their attention to the staircase where Mary and Erin clutched each other fearfully. At the sight of them all, Mary signed the cross on herself, ran towards Jamie and Danny and pulled her eldest and youngest into a tight embrace.

"Are you boys okay? Are you hurt? Where is he? Is he gone? Damn him for doing this!" She gushed furiously.

"Ma it's okay," Danny rested his hand gently on Jamie's shoulder. "We're both good."

BANG!

The front door exploded off its hinges, bits of splintered wood flying everywhere, gunfire smoke choking them. Erin and Mary screamed but none of them had the time to duck or protect Jamie for Bachman was aiming his rifle at each of them. They all threw their hands in the air. The sound of sirens could be heard in the background.

"I got a little problem!" Bachman spat at Frank, "Your son has been the pain in my ass for too long!"

"You're not going to get away with this you sick f-"

"Aah you must be big brother number one!" Bachman said in delight, shooting at Danny's chest.

Erin and Mary screamed as the shot hit Danny. Danny stumbled back, his face scrunched up, preparing for the searing pain but he felt nothing. He felt his chest tentatively.

"Blanks. Nice." Danny murmured through clenched teeth, "Boy Bachman you just keep the surprises coming don't you?"

"That's the plan big bro, figured I needed to up the stakes. Get you all to play along with me!" Bachman answered sweetly.

"And what exactly is the game here Bachman?" Joe asked with narrowed eyes, "What is it you want? Do you just enjoy screwing around with us? Is that it?"

"You must be big brother number two."

"I am."

Bachman loaded up another set of bullets. "These aren't blanks by the way," He added in warning, reading the determined look on Danny's face. "You wanna test me?"

Danny swallowed in rage and held his hands up, shaking his head.

"Didn't think so."

Erin whimpered. Bachman snapped towards her. "Oh don't worry sweetheart, I have no intention of killing you. I got other plans..."

Bachman's arm jerked upwards and he shot at the light fixture, the bulbs burst dangerously, sparks and glass sprinkling down on them.

"Get down!" Danny ordered.

Bachman seized this opportunity; he lunged at Jamie and grabbed his neck using one arm, the other keeping control of the rifle.

"JAMIE- NO!" Danny yelled in terror at the sight of what was happening. He tried to move towards Jamie but Bachman aimed a shot at his leg. Danny whipped behind the door of the living room. Erin, Mary and Frank were trying to help Joe, who was bleeding profusely from the head where a shard of glass was embedded. Nevertheless they crouched together, glaring at Bachman.

"Let my son go Steve!" Frank thundered.

"No!" Bachman replied with utter glee.

"Let go of me!" Jamie cried as Bachman shoved him out of the door and dragged him into the night.

"FRANK!" Mary screamed in anguish, pointing towards the door.

Danny raced after them, slipping in his haste to get out. He was ambushed by six or more cops trying to force their way in. "No, he's out there!" Danny yelled at them, "He's – he's got my brother! You have to get out- Jamie!"

Danny pushed past them and frantically yelled for his brother. "JAMIE! JAMIE!" Danny collapsed to his knees, his chest heaving. "Kid..."

The cops entered the scene inside the Reagan's house, eyes wide and horrified by the sight of the carnage and one of their fellow officers sprawled on the floor, bleeding from the head.

Erin tripped outside to find Danny. He was seated on the front steps of their house, just staring into the distance, completely oblivious to the cops swarming around them, taking control of everything. Many of the neighbours were returning home after a fun night of celebrating, clustered together, and gossiping at the sight of the cop cars parked outside the Reagan's house.

"Oh my God Danny," Erin sobbed, she tried to hug him but he wouldn't budge. He just continued to stare into space, lost and distant.

"Danny I need you to pull yourself together, Bachman's taken Jamie!" Erin snapped.

Danny Reagan just shut himself down completely, tears filling his eyes. His promises – they meant nothing now. His own brother, his own flesh and blood and he had let him down in the worst way possible. He had failed his duty to protect completely. Failed as a cop. Failed his family. Failed Jamie.

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><p>To Be Continued...<p> 


	23. Chapter 23  Aftershock

**Author's Note**Hey guys, thanks for all the support on the previous chapter it was sooo inspiring! This is the aftermath of that...it's a short chappie but I'm writing this amidst assignments blah, blah... there's two more chapters till the end. Enjoy and please review.

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><p><strong>Chapter 23 – Aftershock<strong>

**_July 5th 2000_**

**_12:20 am_**

"Danny please say something!" Erin begged her brother who still sat on the front steps, staring into the distance, lapsed into a stoic silence with tears glistening in his eyes. "I know you're upset but I need you to pull yourself together! We need your help – I - we can't do this without you! We're wasting so much time! Bachman's got Jamie and…" Erin covered her hand with her mouth to stop herself from screaming in torment herself.

"Um - excuse me Detective Reagan?" Officer Reynolds, a young rookie stood in front of Erin and Danny, nervously fidgeting with his pad. "I -I need to ask you a few questions about what happened here tonight."

Danny slowly snapped out of his reverie and turned his attention to Officer Reynolds who blanched slightly at the look Danny was giving him.

"Sorry?" Danny asked hoarsely.

"Danny he wants you tell him what happened tonight with Bachman," Erin said gently.

"Jamie… I've failed my brother. I've failed him haven't I?" Danny murmured in a daze.

"I'm sorry?" Officer Reynolds asked quizzically, not sure he heard correctly.

"I was supposed to protect him and now he's probably dead…"

"He's in shock he has no idea what he's saying," Erin sighed. "No Danny, Jamie's not dead he's just been kidnapped – but we can still save him if you would just snap out of it!"

"Okay…maybe you can tell us what happened here tonight?" Officer Reynolds asked Erin calmly.

Erin glanced at Danny, not really wanting to leave him alone when he was in this state. But then she thought of Jamie and nodded, leading Officer Reynolds back inside the house.

Danny felt like everything was crumbling around him, Bachman had beaten them to it and had literally snatched Jamie out from right under their nose. Danny's grief quickly turned to rage and he clenched his fists tight. If there was even a morsel of hope that Jamie was still alive then they were going to get him back no matter what it takes. He used all the little remaining strength he had left to pull himself to his feet and he staggered back inside the house. Cops scuttled around the Reagan's house, covering the kitchen and hallway with yellow tape. It felt weird for Danny and probably the other Reagan's to have their jobs brought so close to home like this.

"Hey Danny!" Joe called out in relief, Danny turned to find Joe pulling him into a tight embrace, "You're okay…"

"Yeah," Danny whispered, "How's your head?"

"It's fine, it's fine." Joe said dismissively, waving aside the heavy bandage draped across his forehead. "I'm - I'm just going crazy over Jamie right now!"

"Me - me too."

"Danny, thank God you're all right!" Frank announced, arriving from the kitchen where he had been talking to three cops. "Erin told me you were…" He clapped his son on his shaking shoulder and said firmly, "Let's not lose it right now son. We need to get Jamie back and soon. This is all down to Bachman, now, I genuinely don't think he'll hurt him until he knows you're coming after him which means we have to move quickly."

Danny nodded. "Sure." It was too painful. Just knowing that at this moment, his little brother was in the company of a deranged psychopath, talking about him was like spitting out razorblades.

"Do we have any idea where Bachman might've taken him?" Joe asked urgently.

"His apartment? The place that Brian was telling you about?" Frank pointed out.

"No, he wouldn't go back there it'll be too obvious," Joe said firmly.

Danny ran his hand through his hair, thinking, desperately trying to hold it together. "Um – uh, we just need to think about this…maybe…" A thought was very rapidly forming in his mind… "The house!" he clicked his fingers, "The McCredie's house!"

"Yes – but how do you know he'll be there?" Frank asked sceptically. "The McCredie's house…"

"It's easily hidden, it's familiar to him and fortunately it's currently vacant," Danny said in a stretched voice. "Besides, we know Bachman killed Brian and Freddie's holed up in central booking so it's the best chance we've got!"

"Okay son." Frank said quickly, seeing how close his eldest son was to losing it, "We'll go there now."

"No Dad, I can go on my own. You need to stay here and be with Ma. She needs you – and you need to wait here just in case you hear something or Jamie calls or - "

"Danny -"

"I got this!" Danny snapped. A second later he regretted it. "I'm sorry. Dad, I'm sorry. I just meant – I have a hunch that he's at that house. I just do."

"Maybe you should take someone with you," Frank suggested tentatively.

"I don't need to. There is no one else we can get right now. Time may not be on our side this time Dad."

"Detective Sorenson?"

"All the way across the country with the family spending the Fourth of July in the beautiful Californian sunshine," Danny stated flatly. "Dad I have to go."

"Yeah but not on your own you're not!" Joe announced, a look of determination etched on his face.

"Joe – no you're hurt, you can't -"

"I would get a hundred light fixtures smashed over my head and still fight for Jamie." Joe declared. "Danny - I'm coming with you."

"Fine!" Danny whined with growing impatience, "But we have to get moving now."

Danny headed towards the front door but was halted again by his mother and Erin. Danny rolled his eyes in frustration. "Really? Now?"

"Where do you think you're going?" Mary asked in a shaky voice, knowing the answer.

"I'm going to find Jamie Ma, remember him?" Danny replied in a voice laced with sarcasm.

"Now is not the time for your smart-ass mouth!" Mary shrieked, her hands trembling. "Danny this is dangerous – I can't have all of you dead – I won't allow it – I can't – you can't do this to me – I forbid it!"

"Ma, Ma, Ma, hey it's okay look at me, look at me," Danny gently took her hands in his, "It's okay. Joe and I know what we're doing. You're freaking out over Jamie, we all are, but listen to me," he forced his mother to look him in the eyes, "You have to trust me that I will bring him back safely. We're all going to come back home safe."

"Danny," Mary whispered, "What if you find him -"

"Don't say dead!" Danny said sharply. "He's not. Bachman knows he's too valuable to us." He turned to Joe, "We better hurry."

"Take back- up with you son."

"Oh don't worry Dad I'm taking all the back-up I need." Danny replied in a hard voice. Both boys headed towards the open front door.

"I don't think you need me to tell you both to be careful." Frank called out sombrely. Danny lingered back for a moment just staring at him. Then he and Joe scurried into Joe's car.

When they had pulled out of the driveway, Erin turned to her father in anguish, "Do you really think they're going to find Bachman at the McCredie's house?"

"Positive," Frank lied. He started towards the living room, ready to pour himself a large scotch. Erin tagged behind, rambling.

"Well what if they don't? They could be anywhere! What if they don't get to him in time? Or just miss him? What if Bachman's already taken Jamie and left the country or something - ?"

"Sweetheart," Frank interrupted as politely as he could, pouring himself a large measure of scotch, "Please…be quiet."

_**1:55am**_

Jamie didn't move a muscle. He sat rigidly on the kitchen chair, his hands tied behind his back with a rope. How did he end up here? One minute he was standing will his family on one side of the hallway, staring Bachman down, watching him shoot those blanks at Danny and then the next thing he knew, Bachman had fired at the light fixture, it came careering down on them…he felt Joe push him out the way and take the crash on himself… then he felt an arm hook itself quickly around his neck and drag him away into the night.

Now here he was, God only knows where, with Bachman pacing back and front of him like a caged animal. Jamie chanced a glance at his captor.

"Well say something," Bachman snorted.

"You're not going to win this," Jamie hissed. "I hate to break it to you but my family will find you. Even if you kill me, you better be looking over your shoulder for the rest of your life because jail will be the least of your worries. In fact – before my family is through with you, you'll be praying for lethal injection!"

"God you don't give up do you?" Bachman groaned in annoyance.

"And neither will they."

"Because they're your family right?" Bachman asked coolly.

"That's right," Jamie answered with pride in his voice.

"And they'll do anything for you?"

"They will."

"Keep dreaming!" Bachman scoffed. "We're all alone in this world kid, when are you gonna realize that?"

"Don't call me kid," Jamie whispered in a quiet fury.

"Why, you think you're so grown up?" Bachman sneered, misinterpreting Jamie's anger, his lips stretching into an ugly smile. "Well let me tell you something – kid. You're not. You think you know it all. But you don't."

"And you do?" Jamie spat.

"I know that I could've had everything… white picket fence, mother, father, dog, a garden with a bed of roses and playing baseball with all my friends every evening until sunset." Bachman turned very slowly towards Jamie, menacingly. "But I didn't. My whore of a mother was too busy living the whole, drink till you're in a coma and then wake up past noon kind of life. I had to feed myself, put myself through life. If you can even call it that! I wasn't even living!"

Jamie shifted again, anxiously, this time trying a different approach. "You know – it doesn't have to be like this." Jamie said gently.

"Oh yeah here we go!" Bachman jeered, "Give me the speech, go on."

"No I'm serious. I – I mean okay, so you've had a bad life. So have a whole load of other people in this world. But not all of them go running off shooting down shopping malls."

"You're skating on some really thin ice!" Bachman roared, jabbing his seven inch knife towards Jamie's chest.

"I'm just saying," Jamie continued in a calm voice, forcing Bachman to wince slightly. "It might not be too late. You could – maybe – turn yourself in and make amends with your past?"

"And go to jail for the rest of my life? No thank you!" Bachman retorted scornfully.

"But what else are you gonna do?" Jamie said in concern, "Spend the rest of your life running? Killing people just to cover your tracks? When's it going to end, when will you stop running? When you're forty, fifty? What kind of a life a you going to live, what kind of a life can you live? You're falling into a black hole which you and only you alone can claw yourself out of."

Bachman caressed the blade of his knife, his face contrite as he listened to Jamie intently.

"Sure – okay I'm not gonna lie to you, it won't be easy, there'll be people who are pretty pissed at you and I'm one of them but," Jamie added quickly, softly, "I think they'll admire you much more if – if you did the right thing. The decent thing."

"Give myself up," Bachman responded in a frail voice.

Jamie nodded.

"You – you really think they'll admire me?" Bachman asked with hesitation.

Jamie didn't know how to answer this one truthfully and not upset or anger his captive. "Um – well… I think that um… a long time coming - years from now…they – might - could – eventually – learn to respect you."

Bachman just stared at him. Jamie prayed that he had broken down the walls and Bachman would put the knife down and let him go alive.

"Will you – will you forgive me for killing your friend if I do?" Bachman asked dejectedly, avoiding all eye contact with Jamie.

Jamie felt a sharp pang in his gut at the memory of Jared. It would be an insult to not only his memory but also to all the victims Bachman had destroyed. However, he was in an impossible predicament with only the option of death in the future. Not to mention the fact that he could have Bachman finally locked up – and willingly? Talk about two birds one stone. He had to as the pun went 'bite the bullet,' and do this.

"Yes," Jamie forced himself to say as tenderly as he could. "I – I will."

Bachman's eyes flicked towards Jamie's and he nodded in defeat. He bent his knees and set the knife down on the floor -

BANG!

The front door burst open, smacking against the wall and snapping right off its hinges, Danny and Joe, followed by six cops, trooped freely into the room.

"POLICE DON'T MOVE!" Danny screamed, gripping his gun, aiming it right at Bachman who darted behind Jamie's chair and grabbed him in a headlock.

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><p>To Be Continued...<p> 


	24. Chapter 24  Two Soldiers One War

**Author's Note:** Hey, thanks for the reviews, it's the concluding chapter and then one more and that's the end! I have this huge thank you speech planned but I've just come back from Uni in London and well, I'm gonna physically collapse with exhaustion - so here it is, read and please review, it'll make my week! ;)

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><p><strong>Chapter 24 – Two Soldiers One War<strong>

"No Danny don't -!" Jamie tried to yell but Danny didn't hear him, he was too busy glaring at Bachman.

"Don't you dare touch him!" Danny warned with disdain. "If you hurt him, I swear to God -!"

"What?" Bachman laughed, "What are you and God gonna do?"

"I don't know about God but I can tell you what I'll do," Danny growled. "And it ain't pretty."

"Oooh, Detective – you do make me shudder," Bachman said provocatively. "Come give us a hug then boys! I do love seeing old friends!"

"Well if you treat us anything like you treated the McCredie's then I think I'll take a pass at the whole Christmas card thing, thanks." Danny retorted with disdain.

"Let Jamie go." Joe ordered fiercely, his gun aimed right at Bachman's temple.

Bachman squeezed his arm tighter against Jamie's throat, Danny and Joe's eyes widened in panic as Jamie squealed with the pressure on his windpipe.

"Na-uh! One more step and little brother's head gets popped like a champagne bottle," Bachman snarled as Danny prepared to lunge.

Danny, relenting against all his will, shuffled back. "Your game is with us, not Jamie."

"Yeah but to get to you I need him – kinda poetic isn't it Detective?" Bachman said through clenched teeth.

"Come on Steve, you don't wanna hurt him!" Danny said pointedly.

"Of course I do! I'm getting the sweet end of this deal!" Bachman quipped.

Jamie closed his eyes, his mind working furiously. There were many ways in which this scene could play out, depending on the next move of either his brothers or Bachman. But Bachman could win this one, culminating in something deadly.

"By the way," Bachman continued silkily, "Just out of curiosity – you guys haven't told me exactly how much time I'm worth."

"Death." Danny answered with confidence.

"Huh," Bachman said, unfazed, "Then I guess we gotta keep little brother around just a little longer until we can change that fact then."

"What – what are you trying say?" Joe sputtered in disbelief, "You're – you're going to – to keep Jamie hostage here until we cut you some sort of deal regarding your sentencing?"

"Yeah, sounds right!" Bachman laughed.

"Are you really expecting us to believe that we give you what you want and then you'll let us all just skip off into the sunset? Just like that?" Joe said scathingly.

"No. But that's the fun part." Bachman laughed again, delighted at the repulsive look on Joe's face. "Did it even occur to you that I might actually be enjoying all this?"

"Boy, you really are a sick fu -" Danny started in disgust but Bachman tightened his grip around Jamie's throat forcing Danny to swallow his curse bitterly.

"One more word outta you big brother and little brother's neck gets used like a cork-screw," Bachman threatened mencaingly. "Anyone think I'm lying?" He clasped his hand under Jamie's chin, all it would take is one twist and Jamie would be gone. And everyone knew it.

"Danny chill," Joe muttered, holding his arm out like a barrier, his eyes on Jamie's struggling frame.

"Okay, okay," Danny said as calmly as he could through his scalding rage. "Just let Jamie go and keep us instead – then maybe we can…talk about what it is you want."

"Nu-uh, little brother's my insurance."

"For what?" Danny yelled, his temper screeching past boiling point.

"From you!" Bachman shouted back. "As long as I have him - or at least his head on his shoulders - you guys can't touch me!"

"Yeah you wanna bet," Danny growled under his breath, his left hand guiding his right hand which clasped his gun, pointing it carefully at Bachman's temple.

"Aah, you know me… I love a good sense of fair play – I'm giving you one last chance to make the deal and then I won't have to kill little brother slowly and inventively as I possibly can." Bachman sneered.

"Steve," Jamie rasped, "Look – I – I meant what I said before – before…" Bachman's arm was really compressing against his windpipe, Jamie's hands automatically tried to tug it off, unsuccessfully. "It's - it's still not too late to -"

"Shut it kid!" Bachman barked, aggressively tightening his hold on Jamie's neck.

Jamie effectively shut up.

"What kind of a deal are you looking for here Steve?" Joe asked absently, shifting his arm towards Bachman's chest, carefully avoiding Jamie's head.

"All I want is to just be left alone!" Bachman hissed. "But you and your own you can't even do that can you?"

"Not when it involves someone we care about no," Danny replied roughly.

"You're a disgrace to this country you know that," Bachman spat at the floor.

Danny actually laughed, "And I suppose you think you're some kind of prodigy? God's great gift to society?"

"Like you could talk honestly about your life for two seconds!" Bachman snapped.

"Okay," Danny nodded, "My life at times tends to suck beyond occasion. But you know what? I don't care. I know that I'm doing what I love everyday and if it means I'll die doing it then so be it. But you? It'll always end badly for you Steve. No matter what you try and do. We may be soldiers but we are NOT fighting on the same side."

For the longest time Bachman didn't say anything. He just stared blandly at Danny. Then without warning Jamie bit the bullet – he channelled all the energy he had into his legs and kicked himself backwards in the chair. Bachman cried out in surprise as he lost his grip on Jamie who crashed to the floor.

Danny seized the opportunity; he charged at Bachman and slammed into him knocking him back. Joe snatched Bachman's abandoned knife off the floor and began to cut Jamie loose. The rope was too tight.

"Shit! Guys I need some help!" Joe called in frustration to his fellow officers.

Bachman was already rolling to his feet as Danny came at him with the gun gripped tightly in his fingers. Bachman tried to kick it out of his hand but Danny blocked it smartly and punched him. One of the officers tried to tackle him but Bachman ducked, dived and rolled, coming up as Danny leapt at him. Two soldiers once fighting on the same side for their country, now battling each other.

Bachman swung his leg up and aimed a kick at Danny's hand, successfully knocking the gun out, flying across the room. Danny cried out in surprise, Bachman tried to wrap his hand around Danny's throat but he just jammed an elbow into Bachman's face. Danny heard a crack as Bachman's head snapped back.

Bachman stumbled into the wall, clutching his nose which was spurting blood. Another officer grabbed his arm and tried to restrain him but Bachman shifted his body, using all his military strength so the officer went slamming into the wall. He couldn't hold on and lost his grip, slipping down the wall in pain.

Danny flew at Bachman again, in rage, punching him as hard as he could. "You do that to a police officer?" He choreographed another punch, "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that!" Danny hissed with enjoyment as Bachman fell back, dropping to the floor. He rolls off and up, coming back at Danny but he's ready.

Danny ducked a blow delivered by Bachman, spinning around and catching him hard across the head. Bachman collided into the two officers, slamming back into a table, knocking it over.

Danny flexed his arms, feeling refreshed, "I tell you what, it sure is good to be me!" He charged after him.

Meanwhile, Joe and his fellow officer were desperately trying to cut Jamie loose but the ropes were just too tight. All around them chaos was breaking out, out of the corner of his eye, on the floor, Jamie could see Danny dive at Bachman who rolled out of the way. He saw two officers on the floor around the debris of wood from the broken table. They weren't moving… were they dead?

"That all you got big brother?" Bachman baited in a voice tinged with delight, "Come on…"

Danny leaned against the wall to pull himself to his feet while Bachman grabbed a chair and proceeded to swing it at him.

"Danny look out!" Jamie screamed as Bachman hurled the chair towards his brother.

Danny heard his little brother's warning just in time, he hit the deck just as the chair came hurtling towards him and crashed into the wall which he had been leaning on seconds before.

"Got it!" Joe cried out in relief. Jamie felt the rope slip loose and his hands broke free. He squirmed out of the chair but Joe held him down. "No, don't let Bachman see you're free. Let Danny handle him -"

"But Joe he's gonna kill him!" Jamie whimpered urgently.

At that moment Bachman dove right into Danny, both of them crashing through the open door, tumbling down the front stairs.

"DANNY!" Jamie and Joe both screamed in horror.

Joe scampered across the broken glass and splintered bits of wood to Danny's gun which was lying untouched in the corner of the room. He clasped it tightly, "Gotcha."

Back outside, Bachman and Danny both struggled to their feet, just wanting to finish this fight. The right side of Danny's head was bleeding from a deep gash and Bachman's nose was still streaming blood but neither of them seemed fazed by this. Their eyes were on each other.

"Let's get this over with once and for all." Bachman spat.

"Love to." Danny responded, deadpan. "You want Operation Annihilation? You got it Steve."

And that was it.

Bachman's eyes fell completely dead, he roared, charging at Danny who could barely hold himself together on his feet, he was about two seconds away from finally beating him down to the ground. The gunshot ripped through the quiet neighbourhood, like a firework. Bachman howled in pain and shock. His knees buckled and he collapsed to the floor, falling by Danny's feet. Danny looked up in surprise to see Joe standing by the door, with his own gun aimed at Bachman, smoke issuing from the revolver after the release of the fresh bullet. Joe briefly made eye contact with Danny before tossing the gun at him. Danny caught it swiftly, held it in place above Bachman's temple watching him writhing underneath him, in pain. Danny's finger caressed the trigger, pulling it back ever so slowly.

Bachman's spasms stopped. His body fell motionless and his eyes just stared back at Danny.

Danny tried to gain control of his ragged breathing, his mind swimming with recent events as he glared at the body in front of him. It's what he'd always wanted.

Steve Bachman was dead.

"Danny!" Joe tripped down the steps, running to his brother and pulling him into a hug, "Are you okay?"

"I am now, thanks to you bro," Danny answered in a shaky voice. He smiled gratefully at his brother. If it weren't for Joe, Danny would've been Bachman's last victim.

"He's was gonna kill you," Joe said breathlessly, staring at Bachman's body. "I didn't even think – I just acted on instinct. Like Dad always taught us to do."

"One of these times you follow Dad's advice to a T and it has to be one of those times which saved my life!" Danny joked, shaking his head in amusement. "I'm never gonna live this one down am I?"

Joe pretended to think, looping an arm around his brother's neck, "Nope. Never. Gonna bring it up till the day I die!"

"Who says you're gonna die before me?" Danny chided as they walked back into the house.

Joe shrugged, "Who says I'm not?"

"Touché, my brother, touché."

As soon as they entered the house, Jamie, who was huddled in a corner, talking to an officer, wrapped his arms around himself and walked awkwardly to his brothers. Danny just pulled him into a hug.

"I'm glad you're okay," Jamie whispered.

"You're glad I'm okay? What about you – kid, when I saw him standing behind you with his arm around your throat – that was all it took to fuel my anger. I wanted to end this once and for all."

"You're a reverent hero Danny," Jamie complimented humbly.

Danny bowed slightly, "Yeah…I know."

Joe snorted. Jamie just grinned.

"What do you say we get the hell outta here?" Danny suggested, his nose wrinkled, "I don't know about you but I wanna get some sleep. Plus I promised Ma we'd get you back safe and sound."

"Oh right. Ma." Jamie echoed guiltily, "Is she – I mean are they – you know -"

"I don't think they're angry with you Jamie," Joe said with reassurance, "I think they just want you back home which would entail a lot of smothering – if you can live with that."

"Oh I can live with it, believe me I am so over the whole, needing to grow up thing!" Jamie replied in reprieve. "I'm happy being a kid - gonna be ready to milk it for as long as it lasts."

"Good. You should be. For now anyway." Joe smiled.

"Some Fourth of July this turned out to be huh?" Jamie asked in awe.

"Yeah tell me about it," Danny gave an exhausted laugh, "I can't wait to see what you're gonna pull out of the hat next year kid!"

Danny guided him out of the house with Joe trailing close behind them.

"So… do you really think Ma and Dad are gonna be okay?" Jamie asked tentatively.

"You know they will," Joe answered gently.

"Sooo..." Jamie glanced up at them hopefully, "Do you think they'll buy me a car for my birthday?"

Annoyed, Danny shoved him into the backseat. "Don't push it kid."

He slammed the door on Jamie's crestfallen face.

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><p>To be Continued..<p> 


	25. Chapter 25  Ten Years Later

**Author's Note:**Omg this is the end of a long and well... long journey. Thank you to each and every single one of you who read and reviewed because as an aspiring writer it helps for self-esteem and confidence. I started this during the Summer and now I've finished it near Christmas! Wow... anyway, thanks again and I'll probably do another story I mean, I'm bursting with ideas but I think I'm gonna wait a while until work lets up. This last chapter is done obviously in the future, hence the title but it deals more with the siblings as a threesome now that Joe's gone. So for the last time, read and don't forget to review! ;)

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><p><strong>Chapter 25 – Ten Years Later<strong>

_**February 22nd 2010**_

Jamie sat beside the vast pit which was soon to be Joe's resting place; his feet dangling lifelessly off the edge. Somewhere down there, if he leaned over deep enough, he would catch a glimpse of the pinewood coffin in which his brother was sleeping eternally. But he didn't want to look. Not now not ever. The sky was beginning to darken, echoing Jamie's mood, all he could do was stare into the blackening sky. Was this really happening? Was Joe really dead?

He needed to get out. He just couldn't stand being in that house any longer, everyone sidling up to him awkwardly, telling him what a great guy Joe was, how sorry they are for his loss, their thoughts and prayers are with him and his family and very politely asking if he was sure that changing careers at this point in time was a wise move. God, did Jamie need to get out of there. After snaking a couple of anti-depressants from the bathroom, he managed to slip out. Sydney was busy receiving the condolences which Jamie couldn't do any more of, so she didn't notice him leaving.

Jamie felt the footsteps approaching before he could hear them. He felt Danny sit down on his left side and then he felt Erin sit down on his left. And for the first time since Joe died, he actually didn't feel alone anymore.

"Hey kid, Dad sent me out lookin' for you." Danny said softly, he nudged his kid brother. "Why are you sitting here all by yourself."

Jamie shrugged, "I don't know," he answered truthfully. "It sure beats being back at the house."

Erin sniffed and rested her head on his shoulder as the three of them stared bleakly into the empty pit.

"He's not coming back is he?" Jamie asked monotonously, after a minute's silence.

Danny cleared his throat. "No kid. No he's not."

"What do you – what do you think he's doing now?" Jamie asked inaudibly.

"Joe? Probably watching over us now," Erin replied with a tiny smirk. "With Ma and Grandma, Nana and Granddad Seamus. Happy. And at peace."

"Yeah," Danny agreed, "He's at peace. And he'll want us to be at peace too."

"No!" Jamie shook his head fiercely, "Never gonna happen."

"But this is what it means to grieve Jamie," Erin said tenderly, resting her chin on his shoulder so she could see him, "First we'll deny it – but then we'll come to terms with it. Remember when Grandma got sick? Grandpa spent three weeks in hospital praying she'll make it through but she died. He was devastated. But he pulled through it. And Ma... well, we didn't see that one coming. We all just – gotta stick together and have faith, in each other and God -"

"God!" Jamie spat. "Why? What for? For taking away our mother and brother in the space of three years?"

"Hey! Kid…" Danny rested his hand on his brother's shoulder, "We can't just blame God for everything that's gone wrong in our lives. These things happen. We all knew the consequences of the job. I mean this was Ma's worst nightmare. I'm thankful she's not here to see it but – Dad – to outlive his son like that – and Grandpa – outliving your kids is one thing but your grandkids?"

"What's your point?" Jamie said in annoyance.

"My point is that we need to band together and show them how strong we all are! We're all that's left now. Just us three."

"It just – it feels so – so…" Jamie gritted his teeth to stop himself from screaming, "It feels so empty without him. Like we're not whole and we'll never be again. Whenever we're together it'll always feel like there's something missing."

"I know," Danny said painfully. "This one's gonna hurt like hell for a long time but we can get through this, I know we can."

"You know we were so worried about you Jamie," Erin said anxiously, "You just took off – we didn't know where you had gone! Or- or what you had…"

Jamie snorted, "What? You thought I tried to top myself?"

"No!" Danny lied, "Don't you dare talk like that!"

They lapsed into a melancholy silence for the longest time.

"Remember Bachman?" Jamie said suddenly. Danny and Erin exchanged a concerned glance at each other.

"Yes," Erin answered tentatively, "What about him?"

"I tried to save him you know," Jamie said with a small smile.

"What do you mean?" Erin pressed gently.

"I haven't told anyone. Not since that night." Jamie sighed heavily. He could see the moon peeking out at them from behind the trees. "It's so stupid. It's people like him that are the reason Joe's lying in that casket right now. He could never be saved!"

"Hey, don't you beat yourself up over that piece of crap now!" Danny scolded. "He was a psychopath. And you know," Danny let out a low rumble of laughter, "If it wasn't for Joe – Bachman would've killed me."

"You never told me that!" Erin chided in surprise.

Danny just nodded. "It's true."

"Yeah, it- it is." Jamie said quietly. "I remember."

"So are you still sure you wanna go through with being a cop?" Erin asked anxiously. "I mean – you know what it's like, you've seen it first hand -"

"Hey, hey, hey," Danny reprimanded, "Let the kid make his own mind up and live his own life. You sound like Ma."

Erin raised her eyebrows, "My point. Ma didn't want him to become a cop."

"And my point – it's Jamie's life and he can do what he wants -!"

"Okay 'he's' sitting right here trying to grieve!" Jamie interrupted sharply. Danny and Erin effectively shut up.

"Sorry." Erin apologized.

"That's okay. You know Erin, thinking about Joe. And Bachman - everything that happened back then. I was just a kid. I didn't know what I wanted." Jamie turned to his sister with a sincere smile, "But I do now. I was on the brink of actually getting Bachman to confess. I think I'll make a good cop."

"Of course you will!" Danny praised, shoving his brother encouragingly. "And you know I'll always be here if you need my help. And that goes for Dad and Grandpa too."

"If it's what you want then…" Erin broke into a warm smile, "I think you'll make a great cop too."

"Good, so now that's cleared up I am so ready to get out of here!" Danny exclaimed, standing up and dusting dirt off his good suit. "Cemeteries always did give me the creeps."

"Let's pay our respects to Ma and Grandma first," Erin said, letting Danny help her up.

"Kid, you coming?"

Jamie stared at Joe's grave one last time before nodding. "Sure." He let Danny help him to his feet. "I need a drink."

"I don't think that's such a good idea -!" Erin started quickly but stopped at the look on Danny's face.

"I'll be okay." Jamie murmured. "I haven't been – sleeping well at all." He let out a bitter laugh of irony. "I haven't done that since I was sixteen."

"Well I'm not gonna let you out of my sight and go off the rails again this time kid!" Danny vowed. "From now on - big brother's officially watching you."

As they walked out of the cemetery together, ready to start their new lives without their brother, Jamie knew that he would make one hell of an awesome cop. Not just for himself, or his father or Sydney or even his brother and sister – but for the city. And for the people who needed him.

* * *

><p>The End!<p> 


End file.
